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Maxwell 24: Juicing, Chiropracters, and Faux Insurance


Coconut Flan

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I have never heard of chipped beef. How would you normally eat it?

 

God that shit looks foul. What's wrong with a nice chicken and vege pie?

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That casserole reminds me of those Instagram pages where they post the gross 80s midwestern food.  I did not even know chipped beef existed.  I was raised on an all natural gluten-free and dairy free diet over here on the West Coast so I find a lot of those casseroles really shocking. 

 

@NeckPunch  my mom had some sort of book by Teri from way back in the day and she told me that almost every day Teri would just do microwave bargain pizza for lunch. So not only was Teri denied meds for her depression but she was also limited to a crappy diet which certainly does not help gut health therefore does not do her mental health any favors.  I feel bad that the kidults had to grow up on and are still subjected to such a bland, unhealthy diet. 

 

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I’m not so sure what Melanie, NR-Anna and Elissa serve, but we’ve seen that the Bontragers do great food, and Chelsy has posted photos of some of the meals she and John have had. They look a lot better than standard Maxwell fare, which we’ve mentioned on here before. 

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My favorite part of snarking over their crappy food, for real, is when someone confesses that they make something similar but then they show how theirs is marginally (or considerably) better.  I'm TOTALLY doing that right now.  I made a COC casserole last night.  It goes like this: mixed frozen veggies (cauliflower, broccoli, carrots and peas), with a cream of bacon soup mixed in, chicken breasts chopped up on top, and a layer of bread crumbs and grated cheese over that. 

BUT there was no extra chipped beef (why???) or sour cream.  And there were veggies.  So.

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6 hours ago, Black Aliss said:

I have no words to describe that awful chicken dish. How on earth is that better/easier/more economical than a whole roasted chicken with lovely golden crispy skin and vegetables roasted in the same pan? 

Or just roast the chicken breasts? Add in some olive oil and some herbs and you get yummy and far healthier and easier. 

5 hours ago, filomena1815 said:

First post here for me. It totally cracks me up in the comments on the juicing post when Teri says they haven't seen any health benefits from juicing and then they post a recipe like this (chipped beef, chicken, etc.) ! Their bodies are so confused it's no wonder they can't see benefits! Situation normal for them, I guess...

They'd get more benefit from all those carrots in the juicing by roasting them with the chicken breasts alone. Again, much healthier and easier.

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Why would extra salt and pepper be needed?  It already has chipped beef & Campbell's soup.  

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I just saw the new post, that is a monstrosity. What the hell is chipped beef? It looks like that nasty seven layer salad with beef and chicken...

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I am really puzzled by the two kinds of meat in one dish. Why? I don't get it. Also the Carl Buddig brand, IME, is sooo gross. Their little packets of lunchmeat...last time I ate a sandwich with that, I was revolted. 

I guess the closest thing to this in my family's recipes would be "Poppyseed Chicken," which is cooked chicken mixed with sour cream, cream of chicken soup, and poppyseeds, put in a casserole dish. Crush Ritz crackers and mix with a stick of melted butter and use that for a topping, then bake until it's all brown and bubbly. Still not exactly healthy, but there's no chipped beef in it so that's something!

 

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8 hours ago, anjulibai said:

Yeah, that recipe looks super gross. All the Maxwell recipes are just seem so blah and nearly inedible.

Also, I feel like the chipped beef needs to be on top of the chicken, not under. It's bugging me that it's not. 

In my larval years, I could scarf down half a pack of Buddig Corned Beef just because the rest of my diet was so bland (no chips, no chocolate, and I didn’t like fruits).  

As I grew up, I realized the only time I wanted Buddig was in the famous cheese ball recipe:

mix sour cream, cream cheese, finely minced green onion and Worcestershire sauce (orsavory spice) together;

chop Buddig Corned Beef very fine.  

Form the cheese mix into a ball and roll it in the chopped beef to coat.

Smear a glob of that on party rye or a bagel chip!—-mm mm GOOD salty snacking!

Teri’s recipe makes me sad because the Buddig on the bottom of the pan would bake up dried-out and crispy. Anathema!

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Smoothies are still an acceptable way to get things in right? You don’t lose the pulp like in juicing and can hide spinach in there? 

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2 hours ago, freejugar said:

At the end of each year we should vote on the most disgusting recipe of the year from the Mawell blog

Yes!

 

I must say this one is an early contender. Even their "salad" had some vegetables in it. This is just a slow death by sodium.

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3 hours ago, AliceInFundyland said:

Smoothies are still an acceptable way to get things in right? You don’t lose the pulp like in juicing and can hide spinach in there? 

Much healthier - you are still eating whole vegetables and fruits, just in a different form, so you still get the good fiber. 

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10 hours ago, terranova said:

I have never heard of chipped beef. How would you normally eat it?

Me neither - can someone tell me what it is? Is it just processed beef, like ham?

And I think the answer as to how you would normally eat it would be "throw it in the bin, eat something more appetising, like gruel".

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2 hours ago, anjulibai said:

Much healthier - you are still eating whole vegetables and fruits, just in a different form, so you still get the good fiber. 

Thanks. Just making sure. I’m a vegetarian who is not a salad person. (Oh man, the looks that used to solicit.] So when I am operating at healhiest I am fan of “hiding” vegetables. Love the food processor and blender.

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3 hours ago, Captain Obvious said:

Me neither - can someone tell me what it is? Is it just processed beef, like ham?

And I think the answer as to how you would normally eat it would be "throw it in the bin, eat something more appetising, like gruel".

I've never heard of that brand of chipped beef (it looks awful).  I live in Delaware and chipped beef is readily available here in stores or at the local farmers markets (we have a small Amish/Mennonite community here & Lancaster, PA is about 2 two hours from here).  The main store brand of chipped beef that my Mother used was Esskay ("Baltimore's Own Since 1858").  Chipped beef is usually served in a gravy and spread over toast or biscuits. (Stouffer's makes a ready made one, it's in the frozen foods section.)   

https://www.geniuskitchen.com/recipe/creamed-chipped-beef-269872#activity-feed

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19 hours ago, NeckPunch said:

That recipe looks disgusting, but at least the Maxwells have finally posted a useful blog entry for fundie women looking for new recipes to try.

 

I'd love to see a blog post on how Teri fed the brood back when everyone was at home. What sort of tips and tricks worked for them back then.

Massive amounts of frozen processed food, that's what.  She talked about it in MOTH.

Chipped beef on toast was one of my grandfather's favorites.  My grandmother called it shit on a shingle and said it was a true labor of love when she made it for him because it grossed her out.  

 

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2 hours ago, danvillebelle said:

Chipped beef on toast was one of my grandfather's favorites.  My grandmother called it shit on a shingle and said it was a true labor of love when she made it for him because it grossed her out.  

I am familiar with shit on a shingle because it was frequently mentioned on M.A.S.H.  I never want to see it or eat it though.  

I expect Gigi got the recipe for the chicken and chipped beef monstrosity from the Campbell's Soup Cook Book circa 1952.  A lot of those recipes are still around.  Just go to Allrecipes.com and search for "hot dish" and condensed soup.  You will see that not only the Maxwells eat that crap stuff.  

My MIL used to make green bean casserole every Thanksgiving from this recipe: https://www.allrecipes.com/recipe/151595/campbells-green-bean-casserole/?internalSource=hub recipe&referringContentType=Search

No-one ever ate it.  They took a spoonful for manners and left it on their plates.  It eventually got binned.  When I eventually took over Thanksgiving dinner I substituted a sauteed green beans with fresh mushrooms and shallots topped with toasted almonds dish.  You would think I had kicked a sacred cow in the udder!  There were many complaints but people at least ate it.  :)

What I thought was funny is that Teri doubled the Chicken and Chipped Beef recipe (so we can assume some of the "relatives" also had to eat that meal) but she doesn't tell us how many people it is supposed to serve.  She also says in the comments that they don't eat that dish very often because of all the sour cream.  I'd be a lot  more worried about all the preservatives, fat, and sodium in the soup and chipped beef than the sour cream.

 

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This is a recipe my mom served our family when we didn’t live in the same town and came to visit. Now it is a favorite in our home, too, but we don’t have it very often because of the amount of sour cream in it. We served it at the rehearsal dinner for Joseph and Elissa.

This was served at a rehearsal dinner.:jawdrop:

I imagine the Bontragers must have been horrified, they are used to real food.

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So as a former creepy Maxwell anti-Stan who had to walk away from reading them and either being angry or devastated for the childults, I can say nothing is really surprising to me.  There have been a few times when the women traveled themselves, although usually with Terri.  While I think Steve is a control freak extraordinaire I believe for some things he can move on.

 

the saddest thing to me is it feels like a solo trip for Sarah indicates Steve knows she will never marry.  And you know, Sarah may not even want to marry or raise children, the problem is it was the only desire she was ever allowed to have.  So I am not sure she can ever live her best life without therapy to untangle what her dad did.

John and Chelsy look happy.  It’s hard to know exactly how much Steve controls things with the “extended family” but I have always leaned towards he mostly doesn’t.  He controlled the childults enough that when they moved within the 1 mile radius he had filled their heads with the right life.  So he controls them without controlling them directly.  He doesn’t have to attempt to exert any control now.

also, yesterday I ate cheese paper which I saw as divine inspiration to go ahead and do the drop in and say hi which I had been thinking about for weeks.  That’s what I miss about FJ sometimes, no one understands why I laugh as hard as Terri at eating cheese paper.

And that chipped beef in chicken is so gross and I like gross things like that.

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Ok, John’s intermingling with The Beast is surprising.  When somone saw him at a homeschool event years and years and years ago (like maybe 8 or 9?) they reported he fell to his knees and begged people to get rid of The Beast with tears in his eyes.

even if it is just John-adjacent in that Chelsy watches movies occasionally.  I find it so surprising.  

6 minutes ago, Palimpsest said:

@treemom, you are back!  :happy-jumpeveryone:

I hope all is well with you.  You have been missed. 

Thanks. I posted a thread in AYTFJ.

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Is chipped beef different than sliced lunch meat? I've never heard of this. This recipe reminds me of the awful processed food recipes people used to make forever ago. 

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7 hours ago, nastyhobbitses said:

Dear god between the fiber-less juices and these casserole monstrosities, these people must go months without shitting. 

Maybe that's the reason for their weekly bean burritos?

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