Bro Gary Hawkins 8: F is for Felony and No Longer Funny

[keepercjr]

15 minutes ago, CTRLZero said:

One thing that occurred to me, and not that it specifically applies to Gary, but if you can't pass an employment background check because of a felony conviction, one option might be to hit the ol' religion (grifting) trail.  I assume none of these small churches look into the backgrounds of their visiting missionaries/preachers?

I doubt it.  I mean I found it with a simple google search but it did take more than just entering “Gary Hawkins”. I had to know that his real first name is William, not  Gary.  Also needed to add in the state.  I can’t really imagine them wanting to have him over to preach if they knew but I could also imagine them accepting that his sins are forgiven since he claims to be “borned again” and having him anyway.  I do think it speaks volumes that Gary isn’t in any of the pictures of Becky and her escaped kids.  She does seem to try to visit them regularly (I am guessing there is some sort of court ordered visiting schedule) but ol G haw is not there.

I hope he has truly moved on from what he did when he was you her but one can never be sure.  It does make me sick that Becky has 3 daughters who lived with them in that RV... and she thought that was ok.  Maybe her brain told her that she is with him 100% of the time since neither one of them works so it was ok?  I do know there is a fraudulent check charge that matches his name and location from a few years after the first conviction.

[Texas Heifer]

4 hours ago, CTRLZero said:

Isn't Gary's father a pastor?  Are there more of them in the family?  He has to be one of a kind, right?!? 

I think the elder Hawkins is a man of GOD with all the GOD WORDS, yes. I wouldn't be surprised if Gary learned everything he knows at his daddy's knee. His mama sure thinks he's the shit. She shows up pretty early on in the comments on his videos.

I imagine they're pretty proud of him. He's borned again and preaching fire and brimstone from every recliner to cradle his bottom.

3 hours ago, Yogi said:

So I guess it’s pretty clear he does not read here

I think he's read here before, but I don't think it's a regular thing like it is with JillRod. Honestly, I doubt he cares what we think of him. We're reptobates, we're the lost. We're not right with god, and even those who follow Gary's criteria for being right with god aren't as holy as he is, because he's a PREACHER. It's for him to judge everyone else, not vice versa. He's so very wise, is Gary.

He did limit his past posts a while back, after posters in his threads here took screenshots of his weens and various gibberish (including rants about reptobates and robtos), but I don't think it's ever been a 100% certainty that he reads here, just speculation.

[Beermeet]

Bro Gary may have read here but, let's face it folks, he can't follow along with us.  Reading comprehension is not his forte.  I do think Bro would actually be more accepting than Jill but that's not hard to do.  Jill is bottom of the barrel, Bro is almost non-existent.  Molesting rapey creep he is, I bet he's afraid of hell.  Explains him a lot but Becky is even more of a mystery now.  I just can't respect a mother who lets a rapist into her circle.  

[pamplemousse]

4 hours ago, Beermeet said:

Well, this took a dark turn.  Never underestimate your instincts,  we all got vibes from him.  Way to go Gary, you disgusting fuck, now I can't laugh at you without feeling some kind of way.  

This. So much this. This thread used to be good for laughs and groans...now not even the disgusting food he eats is funny!  Curse you, Bro Gary, you and your disgusting pink weens in ME!

[Beermeet]

27 minutes ago, pamplemousse said:

This. So much this. This thread used to be good for laughs and groans...now not even the disgusting food he eats is funny!  Curse you, Bro Gary, you and your disgusting pink weens in ME!

He's why we can't have nice things or good ol' jokes.  

[Jellybean]

But we still have each other and we can be funny even in dark times. @Texas Heifer and her husband have been making me cry with laughter. The God Words v. Walmart Potatoes. I cant even - too funny!

[Briefly]

I am late to the party, I had to go back through the last few pages of the previous thread.  I'm not sure what to say.  He's disgusting anyway.  But now he is on another level of nasty.

[Beermeet]

OT:     This disgust right here?  Needs to happen with Catholics.   Sorry not sorry. Idk why my friends and family turn a blind eye.  Don't need to ditch your beliefs,  just need to call out the whole church for their non action as they call for no birth control and act like rampant child molestation/ rape isn't happening within their ranks, for ever .  Don't go to any service, make demands.  No one goes=message received.   Any major institution runs off its following,  don't follow until demands are met.  Just like everyone ditched bro weeny avatars and can't just have fun any longer,  line was crossed.  Simple.

[Lisafer]

@Texas Heifer I enjoyed your stoned narration of Bro Gary's sermonizing. Seems like it could be a little disturbing to listen to that screaming while high, though. Glad you survived!

[Carol]

4 hours ago, Beermeet said:

OT:     This disgust right here?  Needs to happen with Catholics.   Sorry not sorry. Idk why my friends and family turn a blind eye.  Don't need to ditch your beliefs,  just need to call out the whole church for their non action as they call for no birth control and act like rampant child molestation/ rape isn't happening within their ranks, for ever .  Don't go to any service, make demands.  No one goes=message received.   Any major institution runs off its following,  don't follow until demands are met.  Just like everyone ditched bro weeny avatars and can't just have fun any longer,  line was crossed.  Simple.

You don't have to be sorry.  Not one bit.  Those fuckers deserve everything that's coming to them.

[ElToro]

Been away so late to this news.... Like others, I'm shocked but somehow not surprised. What could it be about the patriarchal fundamentalist movement that attracts these power hungry but inadequate (and deeply flawed) men, huh? It seems like every single fundie thread/family I follow involves a man who turns out to be rotten to the core. Since I joined FJ, I've watched them fall, one by one, like dominoes. And it always involved sex. I'd be delighted if, just for once, they could be good ol' fashioned fraudsters, or tax evaders, or pecan thieves. But no (aside from TFDW)... Always sex and usually with vulnerable victims. Fuckers.

[Ms. Squishels]

He put up a video last night of his oldest son "preaching."  I guess he has now been called to preach.  I reckon he wants to live the good life like good ole Daddy does.  HAYMAYUN.  But while filming it, Gary keeps breathing so loudly it's hard to hear the kid.  He also laughs a lot, for some reason.  You could tell he was just really proud for the boy to be folllowing in the family footsteps!  Hallalooyer!

[keepercjr]

2 hours ago, Ms. Squishels said:

He put up a video last night of his oldest son "preaching."  I guess he has now been called to preach.  I reckon he wants to live the good life like good ole Daddy does.  HAYMAYUN.  But while filming it, Gary keeps breathing so loudly it's hard to hear the kid.  He also laughs a lot, for some reason.  You could tell he was just really proud for the boy to be folllowing in the family footsteps!  Hallalooyer!

Unfortunately it looks like Caleb (I think he is 16 or 17) is following in his dad's footsteps in more ways that one.  I found his twitter last night and lets just say that having Gary and Becky do homeschool was never ever a good idea.

https://twitter.com/CalebHa40573513

He is also following (and bless his heart, was trying to talk to) some very non fundy, pretty girls on twitter.  I hope he didn't feel tremendous guilt.

Spoiler

 

 

[FullOfGravy]

Oh, bless his little heart, he's branching out from Ok fokes to Are right people.  Points for creativity.

Seriously, though, Gary and Becky have done the poor kid a major disservice by home "schooling" him, both educationally and socially.  

[keepercjr]

50 minutes ago, FullOfGravy said:

 

Seriously, though, Gary and Becky have done the poor kid a major disservice by home "schooling" him, both educationally and socially.  

Yes and yes.  He says in the tweet I posted above that he saw things on the beach that made him sick yet he is trying to chat up this woman.  She has picture of herself in a tiny bikini on twitter!  I think he likes that way more than he was willing to admit to daddy.

[Texas Heifer]

I saw that he'd put up that video last night, but as soon as I read that it's his kid preaching, I noped away quickly. Thanks, @Ms. Squishels, for the insight. I may watch it in a couple of weeks, but odds are that I won't. Judging by the cringeworthiness of the boy's tweets, I really don't know if I could handle watching him preach like his daddy. I could be entirely overcome by secondhand embarrassment and never recover.

[MarblesMom]

Looks like bikini clad Twitter lady put him in his place right  quick LOL

[keepercjr]

7 minutes ago, MarblesMom said:

Looks like bikini clad Twitter lady put him in his place right  quick LOL

Yes but he clearly didn’t understand at all.  It looks like he only used twitter for about a week.  I wonder what was up with that.

[Hashtag Blessed]

Oh god, his tweets at women are a world of cringe! He clearly has no clue how Twitter works. I have so many questions!

1. Does he know that all of his tweets at these women are publicly visible?

2. Does he think this is a dating site? 

3. How does he find these women? One of them is youtube famous, but the other is just a pretty girl with only 1,000 followers. 

4. Does he really think "Hi what's your name" is how people communicate online? Is this his first social media experience ever? 

5. Does he know what "idgaf" means? It doesn't seem like it. 

6. Did he read through either of their tweets before @ing them? Because neither of them sounds like they'd want to go to church with him. 

7. Why did he choose Captain America as his profile pic? Is he an Avengers fan? 

8. Does he know he's spelling "Folks" wrong? Is he doing it on purpose? Did he ever learn about punctuation? Oh my god, the educational neglect is heartbreaking. 

.... I think that's all I've got. Thinking about his education, or lack thereof, has me speechless. I have so much sadness for this poor boy. How old is he? 

[Dandruff]

1 hour ago, Texas Heifer said:

Judging by the cringeworthiness of the boy's tweets, I really don't know if I could handle watching him preach like his daddy. I could be entirely overcome by secondhand embarrassment and never recover.

This could be what he's most skilled at...which is pretty pathetic. 

I doubt pink weenie gravy would ever be considered "brain food".

[Ms. Squishels]

Didn't Becky have some kind of education?  Can't she help them with their posts so they don't look so ignorant?  So pathetic.

[Dandruff]

2 hours ago, Ms. Squishels said:

Can't she help them with their posts so they don't look so ignorant?

Maybe she already did.

[MayMay1123]

10 hours ago, Ms. Squishels said:

Didn't Becky have some kind of education?  Can't she help them with their posts so they don't look so ignorant?  So pathetic.

speculation is that she does write some of bro's posts, because some of them are actually literate. i'm thinking captain america did not know in the least how twitter works and was probably trying to be a little sneaky and got caught

[RidiculousFundies]

I'm catching up on this loser's threads, I'm up to where he started peddling toothpasta. I don't even want to read the rest of the them up until this one because he went from stupid and hilarious to disgusting ? pig in two seconds flat. 

This hits a nerve because something similar happened in my immediate family and I am not over it 20 years later. What a sick sack of crap, seriously. How were his kids allowed to live with him, this just confirms in my head that he is potentially abusive in his home and it just be truly awful and scary to live with him. Omg im nauseous. 

ETA - RF out *mic drop*

I'll stick to jrod and jillymuffin 

[waltraute]

20 hours ago, Hashtag Blessed said:

Oh god, his tweets at women are a world of cringe! He clearly has no clue how Twitter works. I have so many questions!

1. Does he know that all of his tweets at these women are publicly visible?

2. Does he think this is a dating site? 

3. How does he find these women? One of them is youtube famous, but the other is just a pretty girl with only 1,000 followers. 

4. Does he really think "Hi what's your name" is how people communicate online? Is this his first social media experience ever? 

5. Does he know what "idgaf" means? It doesn't seem like it. 

6. Did he read through either of their tweets before @ing them? Because neither of them sounds like they'd want to go to church with him. 

7. Why did he choose Captain America as his profile pic? Is he an Avengers fan? 

8. Does he know he's spelling "Folks" wrong? Is he doing it on purpose? Did he ever learn about punctuation? Oh my god, the educational neglect is heartbreaking. 

.... I think that's all I've got. Thinking about his education, or lack thereof, has me speechless. I have so much sadness for this poor boy. How old is he? 

And this is how it begins. We are watching a baby fundie minister take his first steps. Preach hellfire and brimstone from the pulpit and tweet bikini-clad girls on the side. You notice he wasn't approaching random dudes on twitter to talk about Jesus.