Josiah and Lauren Part 11: The Baby Watch Continues

[bananabread]

Echoing what others have said, this still feels like a weird pairing to me. And Josiah still seems pensive/muted/unhappy.

BUT: I like Lauren a lot, and her family is super sweet. They all also seem REALLY into Josiah, which I think underscores how unenthusiastic he is about everything.

Lauren HAS to notice how off Josiah is around her......right? Does she think he'll come around? Does she think he's just taking the relationship very seriously? Does she not care and is secretly just into the fame, having a husband, or plotting her own freedom???

I have so many questions. ?

[eveandadam]

Wow, Lauren's family does not hurt for money at all! They seem pretty loaded, you can also see it in the style their house is decorated in. I guess you can have a large family AND money, if inherited! They seem like the landed gentry in Jane Austen's times...

 

[Meggo]

1 hour ago, bananabread said:

 

Lauren HAS to notice how off Josiah is around her......right? Does she think he'll come around? Does she think he's just taking the relationship very seriously? Does she not care and is secretly just into the fame, having a husband, or plotting her own freedom???

I have so many questions. ?

How would she KNOW though....? She's young - no one in her family has gotten married yet (so the Duggar girls have seen a bunch get married off), she's not been allowed to really spend anytime with boys/men so - aside from her dad - who would she about to compare him against? And her dad thinks he's the bees knees because he's godly and pure and blah blah blah. And her dad is likely different with her mom - but they've also been married for what - 19 years?

So - I think she probably believes that she's been raised to be a helpmeet and someone's wife - and Josiah is a good man, a hard worker, funny, and the first guy to ever REALLY give her a second look. So like all young and inexperienced girls - she's fallen head over heels for him and the life he will bring to her (marriage, family, serving the Lord together- exactly as she's imagined).

We all fell head over heels for the first guy who looked at us - but most of us were younger, most of us had a TINY bit more experience and most of us probably didn't marry the guy within 6 weeks or some insane timeline.

But there is just something.... out of step with him and I don't know what it is.

 

[xenobia]

2 hours ago, Pecansforeveryone said:

Dwain already seems noticeably kinder and more appreciative of Josiah than JB ever was. 

This. I think that Josiah and Jim Bob were/are very different personalities. He seems much more connected to Dwain, and - just like others mentioned - the whole Swanson family really seems to like Josiah. I do think they will be a family who spends more time with her parents than with his parents in the future. 

[Daisy0322]

Si doesnt seem super into it but I don't think she does either... they both feel like to me that they are doing everything they were raised to do. HOWEVER with that said.... I think it's s good match in an arranged marriage type of way and they'll grow to love each other. 

I think Ben and jessa were similar. I think jessa saw a little freedom in Ben and similar values and Ben saw a women that fit his discription of an ideal wife. They didn't seem to have a spark to me until maybe 4-5 months post spurgie. Even the infamous kiss picture felt staged to me. But now they seem like they have the most chemistry to me. Jinger still seems nervous around Jeremy IMO

[Rachel333]

5 hours ago, singsingsing said:

On the other hand, I kind of like Lauren. I hate that people keep criticizing her voice. Most of us can't help our voices, and I really don't think she's 'faking' her voice.

I doubt that she's intentionally faking her voice, but I did notice that she only sounds breathy when she's around Josiah.

[albireo]

EDIT: Lauren's birthday message to Si. Nothing interesting to see here. Wow I goofed, but don't really want to delete the IG image.

Spoiler

 

[SapphireSlytherin]

That's Lauren's message to Josiah.

[Sky with diamonds]

She didn't mention God or Jesus! That makes me happy. 

[singsingsing]

The fact that this 19-year-old young woman could ever believe that she doesn't 'deserve' to be loved, let alone by her own husband, is appalling. This is the outcome of their awful religious indoctrination. You're told from the time you're a tiny child that God loves you even though you don't deserve to be loved because you're a disgusting, evil, depraved sinner, and in fact what you deserve is to be tortured in hell for eternity. But God loves you (even though you don't deserve it because you, tiny child, are a sinner) so he'll spare you that fate if you admit how terrible you are and throw yourself at his invisible feet and beg for mercy. Oh and by the way, when you grow up and get married your husband is God's representative to you on earth, so...

[Sky with diamonds]

Oh brother...she did mention God/Jesus but I think it's a good post for the most part.

[Mama Mia]

38 minutes ago, singsingsing said:

The fact that this 19-year-old young woman could ever believe that she doesn't 'deserve' to be loved, let alone by her own husband, is appalling. This is the outcome of their awful religious indoctrination. You're told from the time you're a tiny child that God loves you even though you don't deserve to be loved because you're a disgusting, evil, depraved sinner, and in fact what you deserve is to be tortured in hell for eternity. But God loves you (even though you don't deserve it because you, tiny child, are a sinner) so he'll spare you that fate if you admit how terrible you are and throw yourself at his invisible feet and beg for mercy. Oh and by the way, when you grow up and get married your husband is God's representative to you on earth, so...

Given their indoctrination, you’re probably right - that she takes that phrase very literally. - But- on the other hand - it’s the type of statement I see used in a more flowery? Light? Way, by lots of very secular men  and women about their partners in a Birthday or anniversary post. I don’t think they seriously mean they don’t deserve love- they are just throwing out a “ thanks for understanding when I blamed you for x, when really I was pissed at my stupid co-worker”  . Don’t know if I’m saying it right, just that it is often used more mildly than this interpretation 

[singsingsing]

5 minutes ago, Mama Mia said:

Given their indoctrination, you’re probably right - that she takes that phrase very literally. - But- on the other hand - it’s the type of statement I see used in a more flowery? Light? Way, by lots of very secular men  and women about their partners in a Birthday or anniversary post. I don’t think they seriously mean they don’t deserve love- they are just throwing out a “ thanks for understanding when I blamed you for x, when really I was pissed at my stupid co-worker”  . Don’t know if I’m saying it right, just that it is often used more mildly than this interpretation 

I know what you mean, though I usually don't see it phrased that way, more often like 'you do nice things for me even when I don't deserve it'/'you love me unconditionally even when I'm being a jerk'. But you're exactly right that it's the context that makes it disturbing to me. With a secular person, I'd likely assume it was just awkward phrasing. With fundies, I know that the belief that they are undeserving of love is deeply ingrained and beaten into them from the time they're babies. And it's awful and so, so damaging.

[nst]

59 minutes ago, singsingsing said:

The fact that this 19-year-old young woman could ever believe that she doesn't 'deserve' to be loved, let alone by her own husband, is appalling. This is the outcome of their awful religious indoctrination. You're told from the time you're a tiny child that God loves you even though you don't deserve to be loved because you're a disgusting, evil, depraved sinner, and in fact what you deserve is to be tortured in hell for eternity. But God loves you (even though you don't deserve it because you, tiny child, are a sinner) so he'll spare you that fate if you admit how terrible you are and throw yourself at his invisible feet and beg for mercy. Oh and by the way, when you grow up and get married your husband is God's representative to you on earth, so...

it's as awful as when Jinger did her fake interview with Ben....

I hate their cult because it reinforces everything bad about themselves, if that makes any sense.  Everyone deserves to be loved. Don't believe the people who say you don't deserve good things. 

 

[Snarkasarus Rex]

46 minutes ago, nst said:

it's as awful as when Jinger did her fake interview with Ben....

I hate their cult because it reinforces everything bad about themselves, if that makes any sense.  Everyone deserves to be loved. Don't believe the people who say you don't deserve good things. 

 

These two have been married for a whopping two months and she's already saying things like this.  Boob definitely made sure that this one would stick...

[albireo]

2 hours ago, singsingsing said:

With fundies, I know that the belief that they are undeserving of love is deeply ingrained and beaten into them from the time they're babies. And it's awful and so, so damaging.

It's like...depression, but externally induced somehow. That's what her phrasing reminds me of now that I look at it more carefully. The only fundie I know that has discussed dealing with depression is Teri Maxwell, and we know how that turned out. 

[VeryNikeSeamstress]

I've said it before and I'll saying it again- Lauren cuts a fine figure in that wedding dress.

[DillyDally]

Sorry if this was mentioned already, but did anybody else think it was really weird that the Swansons named their new baby "Duke Josiah" after, well, Josiah? According to the TLC timeline, Duke was born before JoRen even got engaged (and even then I wouldn't say it's a "safe" deal). Talk about putting on the pressure big time. Thank God Majorie's mum didn't give birth during her courtship with Josiah 

[singsingsing]

1 minute ago, DillyDally said:

Sorry if this was mentioned already, but did anybody else think it was really weird that the Swansons named their new baby "Duke Josiah" after, well, Josiah? According to the TLC timeline, Duke was born before JoRen even got engaged (and even then I wouldn't say it's a "safe" deal). Talk about putting on the pressure big time. Thank God Majorie's mum didn't give birth during her courtship with Josiah 

His name is Duke Matthew. They were discussing the fact that Josiah's middle name is also Matthew, and that they liked the name and they like Josiah so it's 'kind of like' the baby's named after him - but I definitely didn't get the impression that they actually named the baby after him.

[DillyDally]

2 minutes ago, singsingsing said:

His name is Duke Matthew. They were discussing the fact that Josiah's middle name is also Matthew, and that they liked the name and they like Josiah so it's 'kind of like' the baby's named after him - but I definitely didn't get the impression that they actually named the baby after him.

You're right, I usually have my facts straight, so thanks for the correction!

Just checked on Lily and Ellie's blog again and they said "According to Dwain Swanson, the name decision was partly because of Josiah." I haven't watched the latest episode yet, so I'll see for myself later how they explained it.

[singsingsing]

I thought this video was pretty interesting. I kept thinking whenever I saw Lily that I really liked her for some reason, and here she is talking about planning to get her bachelor's degree in teaching and then a master's in speech pathology. Wow! Good for her, and I really hope she sticks with it! And now I'm very much hoping she doesn't wind up with a Duggar...

I appreciated Lauren's honesty when she said that she's a slow learner, that she really didn't like school and didn't want to continue. That's totally valid, and I give her props for sticking with it anyway and getting her associate's. 

[Meggo]

Gosh I hope Lily gets to keep on with school work - she seemed pretty excited about it.

 

[Imaginary_Wonderland]

I really liked Lily too. She definitely seemed more into it than Lauren. I so hope she gets to continue with her academic plans. I did think it was refreshing when Lauren was commenting on the transition and difficulties coming from a home school environment.  I was a slow learner too, and really struggled in school and uni. I enjoyed my time there alright, even though I was constantly wanting to pack it in at as every deadline approached. It is a big achievement for Lauren to stick it out that far even if she is not continuing. At least she got that opportunity to give it a try.

I always wished to see Joseph's journey in college for that one year. It would have been an actual proper storyline, and something different from courtship, engagement, wedding, baby showers, gender reveals, births, blah blah blah on constant repeat. I started following FJ again (after many years ignoring the Duggars completely) in the weeks in the run up to Izzy's birth. I didn't know details about Jill or Jessa's weddings etc, so there was a lot to catch up on. But the fact one of the kids had headed off to college was the bit that I found most fascinating. That was what I wanted to see and hear about. But I don't think it was ever shown?

[Lurky]

I'm so depressed by Katie Bates enthusiastically wanting to be a nurse, but starting cosmetology instead.  Like, nothing wrong with someone who chooses cosmetology, but it really feels like poor Katie didn't have a choice, and was pushed to change her mind.  Hope that doesn't happen to Lily.

[BadMurphy]

I hadn't seen Lauren's parents before Monday and her Dad seems to be a card carrying member of the "I want to be Jim-Bob" fan club. Are we sure their Arkansas house isn't a Jim-Bob rental while they play the part of Josiah's new in-laws only to head back to Georgia soon just like they did when it was time to have Duke?