Sierra 2: Pregnancy Rumors Again?

[FecundFundieFundus]

Just wanted to chime in that a frequent response to childhood abuse is arrested emotional development. Sierra never got therapy for her traumas. Her head is probably a very sad place. Even if she doesn't have/no longer has PTSD (she's said before that the year/s the abuse took place are blacked out, so my money is on having PTSD at some point) it will fuck with your head in a big big way. 

[Daisy0322]

@nst i tend to agree. I work about 6 dats a month because I work in the medical field and want to stay up to date. But as a mostly SAHM I find things to get out and be less isolated. Swim classes, mom groups, getting my nails done, etc. she's an adult and she is responsible for her mental health especially now that she has kids. I have complex ptsd, anxiety and depression issues as well as I self medicated for about 10 years with drugs and alcohol. But when I found out I was pregnant I got clean and starting going to therapy.  I take responsibility for the fact I decided to bring a little person in the world who needs me to take care of myself. Am I always perfect? No but I do what I need to. I just can't have much empathy for someone who says poor me then continues to do what they are doing with out so much as reflecting on their actions. 

[FecundFundieFundus]

Mmmm gatekeeping. I didn't use drugs or extremely restrictive religion as a maladaptive coping mechanism, what's my prize? 

[Timetostoplurking]

I remember, quite a few years ago, being a SAHP with 3 kids under the age of 5.   One of them severely autistic.  Man, some days it was a struggle.  But I knew as they got older, that things would get better.  I knew I was done having babies.  I/we made the choice to stop having babies after my/our third was born. It was a very easy decision to make.  We knew our limits, financially and emotionally.   I wouldn’t change a thing, three was the perfect number for us.  

For Sierra, because of her choices, there is no end in sight.  The babies keep coming and due to homeschooling, she will never get much of a break.  Endless childcare for the next few decades.   

  Make better choices, Sierra !  

[OyToTheVey]

I agree with a bunch of people here. She's just overwhelmed and clearly unhappy. The oldest kids need to be sent to school. And number 7 should be the very last. Not to be dramatic but I really hope that this won't lead to an extreme situation. Most of the things she writes are scary on their own but when added to everything else the undertones are very emotionally abusive by nature. This mindset she's in, people tend to snap in those situations. Never ends well for the kids involved. I hope I'm just being paranoid. 

[apandaaries]

@OyToTheVey given that we’ve never seen any indication of psychosis, just a lot of depression and perhaps anxiety, I’d bet she’s more of a danger to herself.

[nst]

On 8/1/2019 at 7:20 PM, FecundFundieFundus said:

 

 

edited blah balh 

Edited August 3, 2019 by nst

[mstee]

I think that’s it’s perfectly normal to have complaints as a parent but she seems to have them more often than not. Yep -parenting is hard and it’s great to have a good friend to vent to, but I personally find the “everyday is a struggle but we survive” jokes constantly to be very telling. I’m sure she’s trying to come across as relatable to other moms on IG, but I just see an overwhelmed woman who seems to force herself to say that she’s happy and grateful. I hope that the babies stop coming and that she is able to enjoy the ones she already has. Kids tend to know when parents are frustrated.  

[Forevernotfundie]

Live laundryroom breakdown Sierra-style in her instagram story!

couldn't help but laugh because of the irony...

[Belugaloo]

While I agree with others that the constant "days are hard but worth it" posts from her are very telling- she is having hard days more often than not- I do think about 50% of this can be attributed to her a. being pregnant and likely more sensitive than usual, and b. her personality. She seems to be easily over stimulated (she herself says this all the time!) and she seems to have both an anxious temperament and some ADD. It wouldn't surprise me if I found parenthood more overwhelming than the average person bc I also have anxiety and ADD and the desire for everything to be organized. I think a lot of the her words seeming kind of concerning comes from her willingness to talk about things other people wouldnt- and while she seems to think she's being super relatable and *real* there's a reason why most people wouldn't constantly talk about their stresses on the internet. Its good to vent and its good she feels comfortable to express non-perfect feelings, but I do think there is something to be said about keeping some things between you and your husband/therapist/close friends/ etc etc. 

 

 

If a posted every emotion I've had this past year on the internet someone would've had me forcefully evaluated. Its been a HARD year. Instead, ive mostly kept to myself and recently switched from having my primary care doctor refilling my ADHD medication to seeing a psychiatrist.  I dealt with it (mostly) privately whereas Sierra seems to desire and feel better when other people know her struggles. 

[NoKidsAndCounting]

I watched Sierra's Instagram story.  She says she wants this life but everything about the way she's talking and expressing emotions makes me feel that she is deeply unhappy and overwhelmed.  Sure, she loves her children, but I think it's time to stop having kids and get some help.  She needs a laundry fairy/public school/some kind of help.

[Cheetah]

I don't usually follow Sierra closely... just catch up on this thread once every few months or so... but I watched her Instagram story last night and while I can relate a bit to the 'overwhelmed mom of little kids trying to be real' schtick she's going for, she just comes across as a big old martyr/ drama queen type.  I know... she has to justify why she keeps having more kids when they are already overwhelmed.  It's too bad they've never thought that the overwhelming feelings they have are the message from God they are looking for and he's telling them it's okay to go on the pill.  

[Screamapillar]

3 hours ago, Forevernotfundie said:

Live laundryroom breakdown Sierra-style in her instagram story!

couldn't help but laugh because of the irony...

It was indeed very Sierra-style. She used a fake eyelash filter.

[HermioneSparrow]

She needs to stop having kids and her husband needs to get it together and help her. Also, send those children to school.

[bal maiden]

Her husband went to bed at 8pm and left her alone and exhausted to do housework? What a tosser. 

[OyToTheVey]

1 hour ago, bal maiden said:

Her husband went to bed at 8pm and left her alone and exhausted to do housework? What a tosser. 

TBH I think the same of my bffs husband. She's a SAHM and he works. Basically her job is 24/7 and he's 40 hours plus his extra stuff like  working out. It's such a huge deal when he comes home to ask him to do anything. Last night after her kids went to sleep she had to ask him to come out for 20 minutes to pick something up from my place. But she had to handle bed time and dinner and all that before she even came out. I understand that's her job but he's a parent too and it was a Sunday. I feel like if she had more than 2 kids, she'd have a laundry room breakdown too. At this point she's turned a blind eye to a lot of things. Her kids are unruly. 

[FecundFundieFundus]

1 hour ago, OyToTheVey said:

 I understand that's her job but he's a parent too and it was a Sunday.

Dang. Our arrangement is the working parent has total freedom to commute to work, any necessary work commitments and private time to finish projects from home when those come up. So like 35-45 hours of work in the office, 2 hours transportation, a few work trips per year, and occasional marathon work sessions in the home office the stay at home parent is 100% responsible for children and house. Breakfast, evenings, weekends, lunch breaks taken at home: 50/50 responsibility. I don't understand men who think their role is to donate sperm to the creation of a child, bring in a paycheck and play with the kid once in a while. Parenting is hard. When you get to skip all the yucky parts that's being the fun uncle/aunt or the babysitter. 

 

Did anyone else notice Sierra's lake trip had three adult helpers? I wonder if she considered that if the two women who were giving her a hand had 5-10 kids she wouldn't be getting any help. Quiverful folks rely heavily on other people using family planning so there are enough resources for their family but act like everyone should be having 10+ kids.

[OyToTheVey]

4 minutes ago, FecundFundieFundus said:

Dang. Our arrangement is the working parent has total freedom to commute to work, any necessary work commitments and private time to finish projects from home when those come up. So like 35-45 hours of work in the office, 2 hours transportation, a few work trips per year, and occasional marathon work sessions in the home office the stay at home parent is 100% responsible for children and house. Breakfast, evenings, weekends, lunch breaks taken at home: 50/50 responsibility. I don't understand men who think their role is to donate sperm to the creation of a child, bring in a paycheck and play with the kid once in a while. Parenting is hard. When you get to skip all the yucky parts that's being the fun uncle/aunt or the babysitter. 

 

We went grocery shopping and got held back a little so dad took the kids to a scheduled sports thing that goes on an hour down the block from their house. You should have seen the guilt on her. She felt so bad for "making" him do that. Apparently it was her day to be with the kids because he had them a few hours on Saturday. She kept justifying it that he works and they have their own time with the kids and it wasn't his turn. I stood there thinking wow so basically he's a sperm donor and you never ever get a break.

[FecundFundieFundus]

Wow. I'm so sad for those kids... One of my parents had to be forced to spend time with me and that shit hurts. Parents should enjoy spending time with their kids (even if the activities in and of themselves are not fun). This morning a cricket got in the house and we all observed it for half an hour and my husband received some very excited text messages. He told them it was really cool and to take pictures so he could see. He HATES bugs. It would break their hearts if they heard me say I "made" him take them on nature walks.

[clueliss]

Probably sisters of hers since I believe she said something about 9.5 kids and not all of those are hers.

[Satan'sFortress]

Late to the discussion about her previous rant---the one about making the bracelets with the girls.  I can relate to things like that, as I am sure all parents can, but what I don't get is the public posting about it.  What if those little girls knew what she had posted?  They probably had such a great time with their mom doing a special thing--what if they knew that Mom hated it?  I find that sort of humiliating and demoralizing.  I wouldn't post anything about my kids that I wouldn't want them reading. 

[mstee]

I wonder how much of her feelings of annoyance or frustration with a situation over doing activities with her kids she successfully hides from them. I’d guess not much by her posting. Like other people have said, part of being a good parent is smiling and enjoying stuff even when you don’t. I wonder if she makes backhanded comments to the kids. Obviously pure speculation but I suspect her kids won’t be shocked to see her posts one day. I was raised as an only child who had a mom who was easily overwhelmed or annoyed and even though she claims she “protected” me from her feelings, I always knew. 

[crancraz]

Instead of fancy vacations, I’d rather hire a house cleaner. Good lord. I’m exhausted just watching her. 

We just had our third child six weeks ago. I got laid off a year ago and so am a stay at home parent while I maneuver a career change. My spouse works a demanding job as a physician.  He has charts he brings home a few times a week....And he still parents when he gets home because I didn’t make these kids alone. He gets up at night to feed the baby while I pump. He does mornings with the school aged kids. Packs their lunches, etc. Often does bath time or bed time with the middle while I juggle baby and oldest. I don’t understand this “he works so I do everything else.”  My spouse lives here, so he contributes to the home care about 25% and kid care at 50%, which is reasonable for someone who works 50 hours a week. My kids also do a lot of chores and home care, too, at least compared to their friends. As far as I’m concerned, we all live here so we all work to keep our home shit together. 

[Daisy0322]

I work very part time and my husband works full time. I do all the cooking and financial stuff and about 80% of the cleaning. He does about 90% of the yard work and he is very handy so he fixes everything and takes care of the cars. I obviously spend a lot more time with the kid (soon to be kids) since he works but when he is home parenting is 50-50 because parenting isn't a "job" to be doled out. Sure parenting is hard work sometimes but its your relationship with your kids your growing and building. I can't stand it when dads think they have no part in raising their kids and I especially can't stand it when they then wonder why they aren't close with their children

[mstee]

 Kind of random but I went to look for her Instagram profile and went to Joy’s to find it and they aren’t even friends. I thought in previous episodes they showed them as close?