Chelsy and John Maxwell 5; Pregnant, but Still Waiting to Read about the Honeymoon

[IReallyAmHopewell]

14 hours ago, Tangy Bee said:

Wait...!?! You mean Steve has the same CRAZY phone rules as JB? John has been a grown ass man for a while now. That is just  TOO weird and controling.  

But you AREN'T an adult until you are married..... sigh....

When the "girls" get back from their mission-tourism trip, IF IF IF IF [please, please, please] one of them gets a proposal, we can see if Chels is involved in planning that wedding. That might show some "acceptance" by Steve. Might.

[Jigsaw3]

The Bontragers were probably also burnt out after three weddings at once. I'm sure they were thrilled for Chelsy, but it's hard to turn around and plan a fourth family wedding in four months, especially with everyday life going on at the same time. Harvest, Thanksgiving, Christmas, plus touring is a lot of work.  And John and Chelsy were also trying to finish the house: Chelsy spent a lot of weekends driving to Maxhell to do renos.

And I agree with whoever upthread said that either John or Chelsy or both weren't interested in waiting, whether for sex or to get away from their families. There were compelling reasons to wait: the house would have been more finished, the wedding would have been more organized, Chelsy would have had her barefoot boho summer celebration. Plus they knew 10(!!!!!) couples getting married on that day. So the impetus for picking a winter wedding must have been pretty strong, stacked up against the disadvantages.

But of course, they'll never tell us the real reasons why.

[Captain Obvious]

5 hours ago, IReallyAmHopewell said:

But you AREN'T an adult until you are married..... sigh....

When the "girls" get back from their mission-tourism trip, IF IF IF IF [please, please, please] one of them gets a proposal, we can see if Chels is involved in planning that wedding. That might show some "acceptance" by Steve. Might.

Yes, let’s hope so!

The Maxwells were slightly more involved with Joe’s wedding, even though they didn’t host it -  they helped decorate the venue and Mary sewed the flower girl dresses. But the reception food, decorations, flowers etc all seem to have been done by Elissa’s family. They were also a LOT more involved in the actual ceremony, since Steve conducted it.

FWIW, I have a feeling that should a Maxwell girl ever get married, particularly if it’s the next wedding after John & Chelsy, that the wedding will be on a similar scale to J & C’s, including by providing a full meal. 

While I think it’s true that having a more traditional reception with a full meal would be judged pretentious/offensive in fundie circles, I don’t think the Maxwells are really part of any circle but their own. And we’ve seen that  they are not above flaunting their relative wealth: they have newish cars, modern kitchen appliances, frequent vacations/travel, shop frequently, don’t appear to wear thrift store clothes.

I totally wouldn’t put it past Steve to host a relatively grand wedding as a public demonstration of the success of the Maxwell methods and the benefits of a debt-free lifestyle. I could imagine the cost of the wedding being mentioned and justified because they saved, worked hard, didn’t go into debt and possibly something Biblical about hosting guests chucked in as well. And I could imagine the girls having 15 bridesmaids just because Chelsy had 14. 

The Maxwells would end up getting a lot of help - I mean they couldn’t even host the J & C reception dinner without their Idaho friends helping - but they’d make out like it was their own crowning glory and not possible without their hard work, creativity like nobody else has ever  creativitied and let’s not forget Steve’s mighty headship.

 

[Foudeb]

8 hours ago, Jigsaw3 said:

But of course, they'll never tell us the real reasons why.

Leaving the Fathership. They don't need to say it, its obvious. 

[IReallyAmHopewell]

12 hours ago, Captain Obvious said:

a more traditional reception with a full meal would be judged pretentious/offensive in fundie circles,

I think the reason many don't have a full meal has to do with large families and a striving to be [obsessed with] debt free. I don't think it's any cultural thing beyond that. But when you each have 10 siblings and you invite a bunch of people with similarly sized families......well it gets beyond merely "expensive." Most families don't have a tv network paying but may have 4 more daughters to marry off without going into debt.

 

 

[JermajestyDuggar]

Chelsy made a post about sewing her wedding dress. My mom sewed her own wedding dress back in the 70s. It turned out very pretty. It was clean and simple unlike some other 70s wedding dresses (as ruffles and frill seemed to be very trendy at the time).  But my mom regretted sewing it. Engagements were short back then. So she only had six months to plan a wedding and sew her dress. She said it was too stressful. I think Chelsy’s dress turned out very pretty too but it must have been stressful. 

[Coconut Flan]

2 hours ago, IReallyAmHopewell said:

I don't think it's any cultural thing beyond that.

It's cultural within certain groups, churches, and even denominations.  My neighbors could afford a meal for the daughters' weddings, but no one at their church ever does that.  The standard is a 2:00 wedding on Saturday with cake and punch and possibly a few finger sandwiches in the church hall immediately following.  Anyone who deviates from that is gossiped about for years afterward so it's rare when someone does.  

This is why many of us shudder over the reception discussions.  People tend to do what is normal and accepted behavior for their group.  What your group does may be vastly different from someone else's without either one being wrong, cheap, ill-mannered, or inconsiderate.

[scoutsadie]

Chelsy mentioned in her blog that her dad handed her and John a big check early in the engagement, to let them decide how best to budget, plan and spend on wedding prep.  It was thoughtful of her to mention that, but mostly I was struck with how incredibly unlikely Steve would be to do that for one of his daughters.

(Psst - @Coconut Flan - is it possible for you to correct the spelling of C's name in this and the previous thread title? There should only be one E in her name.)

[VBOY9977]

Well, Chelsy finished the 10 parts. The last part is things she did that she’d do again. 

I hope she doesn’t take a huge break from blogging after this, I like hearing her updates and the Maxwells and the Bontragers haven’t posted updates on them in a while.

[freejugar]

I can't stand the fact that she thinks she's such a special snowflake that she went barefoot

[DooDahDame]

Dinner at a Maxhell daughter reception will be meatless burritos with accompaniments, Teri’s pea salad mess and Steve’s favorite pumpkin pie. After all, their money...their favorites. But no Pepsi! 

The reason they made all the food for J and C’s rehearsal dinner was to avoid the restaurant place cards and server fiasco, plus Steve can be rather frugal at times.

[JermajestyDuggar]

This seems kind of odd from Chelsy. Did her pictures turn out bad? She could always make a post about her honeymoon without pictures. It just surprises me she would choose to leave out the honeymoon for such a small reason. 

[Ozlsn]

4 hours ago, JermajestyDuggar said:

This seems kind of odd from Chelsy. Did her pictures turn out bad? She could always make a post about her honeymoon without pictures. It just surprises me she would choose to leave out the honeymoon for such a small reason. 

Aw. I was looking forward to the honeymoon blog! I wonder if she's just wondering how to make it sound like they did a lot when they didn't leave the room much! Handy hint - spend most of the time talking about how thrilling it was to be a married woman with the man you love and how nice driving/eating/praying together every day on holiday was. Then mention Texas (or wherever they were) and how some thing was randomly different from home and you laughed about it. Because you were happy and together and in love and miles away from Stevehovah's watchful eyes...

[SPHASH]

Did Judgy Chelsy intentionality throw some shade on Prissy Chris when she said a good photographer is a must.  

[JermajestyDuggar]

47 minutes ago, SPHASH said:

Did Judgy Chelsy intentionality throw some shade on Prissy Chris when she said a good photographer is a must.  

Maybe. Chelsy does photography mostly as a hobby. Although she’s probably been paid a little for some of it. So she may feel she knows something about decent photography. 

[OhNoNike]

Eh. I think it’s kind of nice she doesn’t want to post about her honeymoon.  I’m a pretty open book myself, but I didn’t tell work about my second pregnancy for many many months.  It was nice just having something for me (I guess because I’m such an open book).  So I could see her reasoning. 

[HereticHick]

my two cents:

Chelsy's rushed these last few posts because she's going to make a pregnancy announcement.

 

She doesn't want to blog about the honeymoon because the few photos she has are of her in non-Maxwell approved clothing (even though it was January). We've seen her in jeans before. So I'm guessing she and John went hiking somewhere--maybe in Big Bend, or the Guadalupe Mtns--and she wore jeans.

[JermajestyDuggar]

14 minutes ago, HereticHick said:

my two cents:

Chelsy's rushed these last few posts because she's going to make a pregnancy announcement.

 

She doesn't want to blog about the honeymoon because the few photos she has are of her in non-Maxwell approved clothing (even though it was January). We've seen her in jeans before. So I'm guessing she and John went hiking somewhere--maybe in Big Bend, or the Guadalupe Mtns--and she wore jeans.

I feel like she would wait until her SILs have their babies. She waited to announce her engagement until well after the weddings. I think she doesn’t want to steal anyone’s thunder. So I would say she won’t announce for another few weeks. Lina is currently overdue and Cass is due tomorrow. So I’m expecting an announcement anytime from Cass or Lina anytime. 

[VBOY9977]

So she didn’t post the HM but she commented this description

 

[nastyhobbitses]

On 7/13/2018 at 10:26 PM, JermajestyDuggar said:

This seems kind of odd from Chelsy. Did her pictures turn out bad? She could always make a post about her honeymoon without pictures. It just surprises me she would choose to leave out the honeymoon for such a small reason. 

SPECULATION AHOY: Homegirl wore Heathen Sluttish Pants and didn't take enough waist-up photos. 

[Palimpsest]

1 hour ago, VBOY9977 said:

So she didn’t post the HM but she commented this description

 

I'm interested in the work conference.  Was it real estate or irrigation?

And that would be inside peek, not peak, Chelsy.

ETA:  Perhaps it was this one day irrigation conference: https://www.greentouchhub.com/listings-details/dallas-irrigation-expo-january-25-2018

[JermajestyDuggar]

That sounds like a nice honeymoon. I would probably tell my husband to go to the conference too. I don’t mind being alone wandering around a new city. 

[Dru]

On 7/13/2018 at 3:59 PM, freejugar said:

I can't stand the fact that she thinks she's such a special snowflake that she went barefoot

I mean, I can't deal with the term "snowflake" in general and most women I know aren't about to go barefoot in the snow. Maybe just us then?

On 7/14/2018 at 4:05 PM, SPHASH said:

Did Judgy Chelsy intentionality throw some shade on Prissy Chris when she said a good photographer is a must.  

Sorry, didn't get multi quote to work right, Did we know previously that Chris does real estate and product photography too? Also, did Nivea get aboard with him or did he take the images as "samples"

[Palimpsest]

9 hours ago, Dru said:

Did we know previously that Chris does real estate and product photography too? Also, did Nivea get aboard with him or did he take the images as "samples"

We did.  He's been doing that for about 2 years, although he seems to spend more time playing with his website than he does taking photos.  The real estate photography was added when John got his licence.   I suspect the product photography is mostly samples

[freethemall]

Well, guess the thread title should change to "A red dress post instead of a honeymoon".