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Lori Alexander 51: Looking for the Transformed Husband


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10 hours ago, Melissa1977 said:

Alyssa has a lovely instagram and looks so sweet and happy, but why is everybody sure she doesn't share her parents beliefs? Of course, not entirely, but I wonder if she's ok with all that submissive crap and Bible-over-law ideology.

I mean, Ryan wife's IG also looks cute but we all know how they train their children and how comfortable are them leaving kids with grandma Lori.

Unpopular opinion here but I can't swoon over Alyssa. I admire her for her courage, strength and beauty. I know it can't have been easy, growing up in Lori's household, and as the oldest, too. However, the constant pictures of herself in ballet poses gets old. I know she might need to do it for professional reasons, but it also seems a bit like, "Look at me!" And she seems to have the same food obsession as her mom, believing that some foods are magical and will solve all your problems. In fact, Lori's entire family (sisters, mom, husband, kids) all seem to be obsessed with eating the right thing and then (most important) talking about it.

I also can't swoon over Erin. First of all, I understand she needs to work at her business, but leaving your kids with Lori ??? Unforgivable. Also, on her IG, she talks to women like they are idiots. "Here are some new pretties. . . " 

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3 hours ago, feministxtian said:

My husband doesn't like for me to travel alone...it's not creepy, the man is a professional worry wart. But, then again, I was t-boned by some idiot not 50 feet in front of him. He doesn't like it but he doesn't "forbid" it (but I think if he thought he could get away with it, he'd drive me everywhere)

Mine, either, tbh, but it's not really so much jealousy or controlling stuff. We're just kind of joined at the hip. He had a trip not long ago without me, and he texted me constantly because he missed me. 

Not knowing the context of his dislike for travel, it's hard to say if he's worried about her, controlling or what.

2 hours ago, lilwriter85 said:

There was another red flag about Alyssa's husband years ago when Lori mentioned how Alyssa got rid of some of her clothes because Jon didn't them. I thought that was a bit controlling.  Lori mentioned a few times on the Always Learning blog that Jon grew up in a household where his mother was a servant to his father.  It's possible that Jon and Alyssa have changed some of their beliefs over the years. 

 

How reliable of a narrator is Lori, though? We know she's said pretty obnoxious things about her own parents and was taken to task by her aunts for it. Was Jon's mom really a servant, or did she just "spoil" him, for lack of a better term, which Lori translated as "servant"? I know I do things for Mr. Polecat that could be considered "serving" him, and in a way, I am, but it's mutual. He does those same things for me, too. 

The clothing thing is super red-flag-gy, though.

 

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This post showed up because a Facebook friend of mine commented.  Friend who commented is a semi-conservative Christian woman with a half sleeve - needless to say, she was not impressed.  It’s always weird to me when FJ world crosses in to non FJ world.

 

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As far as Lori's kids/sons-in-law/daughters-in-law-

Erin and Ryan don't get a pass from me.  Ken confirmed the Emma story, and they allow Lori to keep their children, which tells me all I need to know about them.

Steven and Emily allowed Lori to keep their daughter, and Emily left Amazon reviews defending Lori.  She also posted a picture with her daughter holding Lori's book, and something like, "Start them young".  Again, no pass.

Cassi is actively posting in the chat room, and defended Lori's discipline practices in the Amazon reviews.  I used to feel really sorry for her, but I am starting to think her kids are getting the Lori treatment, and if so, she (Cassi) is 100% responsible.

Alyssa seems to be a decent human being.  I agree with @Hisey, the pictures are a bit much, but whatever.  I hope she stands up for herself...I can't stand the way Lori's always taking jabs at her.

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8 minutes ago, Koala said:

Steven and Emily allowed Lori to keep their daughter, and Emily left Amazon reviews defending Lori.  She also posted a picture with her daughter holding Lori's book, and something like, "Start them young".  Again, no pass.

I wasn't aware of this...and while in general I stand by my earlier post in theory, when one injects themselves into the public arena, that changes everything.  Fair game 

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9 minutes ago, Koala said:

As far as Lori's kids/sons-in-law/daughters-in-law-

Erin and Ryan don't get a pass from me.  Ken confirmed the Emma story, and they allow Lori to keep their children, which tells me all I need to know about them.

Steven and Emily allowed Lori to keep their daughter, and Emily left Amazon reviews defending Lori.  She also posted a picture with her daughter holding Lori's book, and something like, "Start them young".  Again, no pass.

Cassi is actively posting in the chat room, and defended Lori's discipline practices in the Amazon reviews.  I used to feel really sorry for her, but I am starting to think her kids are getting the Lori treatment, and if so, she (Cassi) is 100% responsible.

Alyssa seems to be a decent human being.  I agree with @Hisey, the pictures are a bit much, but whatever.  I hope she stands up for herself...I can't stand the way Lori's always taking jabs at her.

I agree.

For Alyssa, I think ballet was an escape, a source of comfort, and a healthy coping mechanism. Through that, she seems to have developed some positive relationships. 

I also agree that the whole lot of them have unhealthy relationships with food- even in a few cousins. It’s bizarre. I certainly believe in eating healthy but not to the point that I can’t enjoy a good meal (and an occasional run through the McD’s drive thru for a Diet Coke and fries). 

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Alyssa's area is food & fitness though. Not everyone posts personal stuff on their instagram. Mine is mostly knitting, spinning, Crazy Kat & gardening  & some health food stuff. 

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Lori and her people have set up such a nice world for themselves. If anyone is offended by what she says it's because they're sinful and living a life in the flesh. It can't possibly be because she's wrong. She's getting the hate because the world hates the truth. She can't possibly get the disagreement because she herself is offensive. There is no winning with these people. No responsibility, no actually accountability it's nothing but an echo chamber of gaslighting narcissists. 

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25 minutes ago, AlwaysDiscerning said:

Liar Lindy!!!

Lori is doing exactly the opposite, taking down the respectful comments, and leaving the nasty ones.  Hey, a 'godly mentor' needs something to prove that she's being 'persecuted,' right? 

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1 hour ago, Koala said:

Cassi is actively posting in the chat room

I have to be honest (and I am not trying to defend anyone) but I have never seen Cassi post in the chatroom. Does she go by a different name? Of course, I could have missed it. 

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16 hours ago, Emilycharlotte said:

lookhuman.com has “debt-free virgins without tattoos” merchandise for sale—-mugs, shirts, and buttons.  FYI. 

I don’t know if I’m amused or horrified. 

 

I do like this one: https://www.lookhuman.com/design/359703-deeply-indebted-hussy-dipped-in-ink/6733-heathered_black-lg

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8 hours ago, feministxtian said:

My husband doesn't like for me to travel alone...it's not creepy, the man is a professional worry wart. But, then again, I was t-boned by some idiot not 50 feet in front of him. He doesn't like it but he doesn't "forbid" it (but I think if he thought he could get away with it, he'd drive me everywhere)

Mr. Briefly is the same way, he doesn't really like me traveling alone. He's protective but for a reason.  I was stalked by a guy from high school that I dated after we graduated.  But to someone who does not know, it probably does look like he's overprotective.

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28 minutes ago, Briefly said:

Mr. Briefly is the same way, he doesn't really like me traveling alone. He's protective but for a reason.  I was stalked by a guy from high school that I dated after we graduated.  But to someone who does not know, it probably does look like he's overprotective.

My husband thinks he "borders on creepy" when I go out alone. I get it though. 2 bad car accidents, one that happened in front of him and the last one that fucked me up...and Vegas drivers suck too. He worries. Depending on where I'm going and how traffic is, he'll ask me to text him when I get to wherever it is and text him when I'm leaving to come home. Honestly, he doesn't care where I'm going, but he just gets freaked out when I drive myself anywhere anymore. Shit, I can't explain it right...he's not creepy, controlling or any of that shit, he's just a terminal worry wart who thinks his job is to be my personal chauffeur and since our work schedules don't mesh, he can't be. 

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1 minute ago, feministxtian said:

My husband thinks he "borders on creepy" when I go out alone. I get it though. 2 bad car accidents, one that happened in front of him and the last one that fucked me up...and Vegas drivers suck too. He worries. Depending on where I'm going and how traffic is, he'll ask me to text him when I get to wherever it is and text him when I'm leaving to come home. Honestly, he doesn't care where I'm going, but he just gets freaked out when I drive myself anywhere anymore. Shit, I can't explain it right...he's not creepy, controlling or any of that shit, he's just a terminal worry wart who thinks his job is to be my personal chauffeur and since our work schedules don't mesh, he can't be. 

He does not sound creepy to me.  He sound caring.  There is a huge difference between the two, and as you said - he's seen two accidents.  So of course he's concerned.  He knows "what's out there" as we say around the Briefly house.

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Just now, Briefly said:

He does not sound creepy to me.  He sound caring.  There is a huge difference between the two, and as you said - he's seen two accidents.  So of course he's concerned.  He knows "what's out there" as we say around the Briefly house.

Thank you! You got it! According to him, it's his job to worry about me. I will say he's damn good at it! For us it's a mutual worrying thing. His blood sugars started creeping up last night...so we did a cannula/tubing change this morning. I worry about that A LOT! He worries about me driving, lifting things, doing things, etc. He knows I'll go until the pain is off the charts and still try to push more. I've been informed that when we move, I'll be "instructed" to go back to the new place after I take him to pick the truck up and can piddle around there while they're loading here. Honestly, the only response to that is "yes sir" (said VERY sarcastically)

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Echo chamber of gaslighting narcissists 

and

Deeply indebted hussy dipped in ink...

...Are two quotes that must be forever committed to memory.  Thank you. 

I'd much rather be a member of the DIHDII (DeeDee) club than the gaslighting narcissists.

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@fluffy- I could have sworn someone from the chatroom told us that Cassi was posting there, and when Lori leaks quotes from the super secret group, she usually includes quotes from "Cassi" (whose story seems to match her daughter).  Maybe I am wrong.  I would feel a lot better if I were...

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7 hours ago, lilwriter85 said:

Another youtube response video to Lori. 

 

This is Sheila's daughter.  I just watched it from the link above and it's really good.  I'm going to link it on our facebook page when I am done reading this thread.  Sheila's post was also very good.

6 hours ago, Koala said:

Because Lori paid cold hard cash?  

I don't go on facebook very often anymore, but I have some pretty close to fundieish facebook friends and I thought FOR SURE I would have the Lori post in my feed.  Amazingly, not a word about it.  Nothing. *crickets* Not even a rebuttal.

Unfortunately, I still ran into pro-Trump posts so quickly noped right out of FB again.

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2 hours ago, AlwaysDiscerning said:

Robert Truelove supporting her. An hour video!! Some of you will remember him.

 

ain't nobody got time for an hour long video pro or con for anything, let alone Lori.  I thought Sheila's daughter, Kate, did an amazing video and 11 minutes was just about right.  Much longer and I would have turned it off.

The only long videos I watch are tv shows and art/coloring tutorials.  That is just me though.

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1 hour ago, feministxtian said:

My husband thinks he "borders on creepy" when I go out alone. I get it though. 2 bad car accidents, one that happened in front of him and the last one that fucked me up...and Vegas drivers suck too. He worries. Depending on where I'm going and how traffic is, he'll ask me to text him when I get to wherever it is and text him when I'm leaving to come home. Honestly, he doesn't care where I'm going, but he just gets freaked out when I drive myself anywhere anymore. Shit, I can't explain it right...he's not creepy, controlling or any of that shit, he's just a terminal worry wart who thinks his job is to be my personal chauffeur and since our work schedules don't mesh, he can't be. 

Sounds like he had some leftover trauma symptoms which is really pretty common. PTSD and similar trauma reactions are not uncommon when it comes to things like accidents and medical experiences like surgery and sudden medical issues. One of the reasons people might fear going to the doctors after a frightening medical experience. I just don't know if it's talked about as much as something like combat or violence related trauma. So it doesn't sound like he's creepy, so much as his body and mind remember a trauma experience that is much harder to process than normal experiences. This causes more intense feelings of worrying and fear. 

Of course you might already know all that and I could be totally wrong. :D I just have an interest in trauma and how it interacts with the brain. 

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2 hours ago, Briefly said:

Mr. Briefly is the same way, he doesn't really like me traveling alone. He's protective but for a reason.  I was stalked by a guy from high school that I dated after we graduated.  But to someone who does not know, it probably does look like he's overprotective.

I don't travel alone for obvious reasons, but if you really want to see my husband get super twitchy, try to push my wheelchair ;)   I thought he was going to actually tackle a friend some years ago when he was joking around and started randomly pushing me down the sidewalk we were all gathered in a group trying to decide what to do after a trip to the zoo with a bunch of chatroom friends that had come to visit us from all over.

He doesn't even really like nurses or techs pushing me, but has learned to let it go if they "insist."

ETA: I just realized I picked a bad post to quote on this.  I wasn't trying to make fun of or belittle your experience, @Briefly.  I just read the first sentence and it made me think of my husband with my wheelchair so quoted you.  I went back and read the entire post after I posted and saw the context.  Apologies!

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