Mr & Mrs Jill Duggar 60: The Shilling Dillards

[YoungAndHaggard]

Did anyone else see what Jill said about the movie? I just find it odd that she didn’t take the opportunity to bash all the things “wrong” with the Incredibles, just agreed that the short beforehand was weird. Idk, it just struck me as off brand for her. Anyone else?

[luv2laugh]

I am in the minority but these are BIG changes for someone like golden fundie daughter Jill. Jill used to love preaching her holier than thou modesty beliefs and came off arrogant. I believe she still has hateful beliefs but is now fundie-light Southern Baptist and no longer IFB fundamentalist. I wouldn’t be surprised if her and Jinger drink wine or beer. I bet the husbands do. I’m also assuming they practice birth control or NFP. She’s not worried about looking like a “rebel” and I wonder what JB and Michelle think. I remember Alyssa said she still had to wear skirts when visiting the Bates home out of respect for her parents’ beliefs. Jessa may SEEM relatable but I still think she’s a fundie, don’t let the cute baby pics fool you. Ben says he doesn’t care if she wears pants and she still won’t be seen in them. Jessa is simply better at hiding her beliefs. Pants may not make one an apostate but a hardcore fundie will never be seen in pants and will debate the issue just like Jill Rod.

The LESS exposure to other people and culture the Duggar offspring have, the more likely they will remain fundie. This is why I expect Joystin and JoKen to be the most fundie, living small town country lives away from diversity and among fundie parents on both sides. I expect the more exposure the others get to people not like them, the more they’ll evolve.

Personally, I think Jinger changed out of truly always wanting diversity from the beginning. I believe as Jill increased her exposure to others, including pants wearing Cathy and college students, her beliefs evolved.

[kiwi]

Why would the Dullards attend their sister in laws brothers wedding??? 

If my sister in laws brother got married id not be invited!

 

Are fundie weddings an “invite everyone you know and their dog” events? 

[Lurky]

I have always felt sorry for Jill, because she's the one who bought into trying her hardest to be the daughter her parents wanted, and that Golden Child time was great for her, but as others have said, once she married, it all fell apart.  She was set up in the arranged marriage with Derrick by JB, and she genuinely thought she'd love the missionary lifestyle, because her parents had told her they were doing super-important missionary work, and she was so sheltered, she didn't know the difference between missioncations and living overseas - and she was never taught any critical thinking skills, so couldn't work it out beforehand. Her parents set her up to fail in almost every way.  I've said before, they should have sent her on a three-month placement, maybe with a sister, or another Fundy daughter, to prepare her for actually living overseas.  

And now there's social media, which looks so simple, anyone can do it, right?  And Jill is *so bad* at it!  Like, so bad it's comedy.  But it's also one of those things that *is* a skill.  Good social media looks effortless, and of course it does comes easy to some people, but everything about it involves skills, from knowing how to take a good picture, to using words well.  And the Duggars didn't grow up doing it, like other women their age - if anything, I'm amazed Jessa is so good at it, because their education was so poor.   Jinger was allowed to learn about photography, so it's no surprise hers is better, but Jinger and Jeremy also seem to have other people around them to take their endless photos of her looking up at him adoringly while he smiles at the camera. 

And it's not even like Jill seems to have friends, who can say "oh honey, no". She's one of the daughters who never seemed to have a peer best friend.  Jana had JD as her twin, Jessa and Jinger were/are besties, but Jinger also was very close to Joe and Josiah.   Jill has Joy, but that was in sister-mom mode rather than friends - and Joy was very close to her brothers (esp Joe, again, who seems super-popular).  And while Jessa and Jinger seem to have a ton of friends, and Jana has Laura etc, Jill lives by her parents' lesson that her husband should be her best friend.  She's also moved around a lot more than her sisters, so doesn't have the long-term connections  - and it's not like Jinger, who was moving into her husband's social circle. 

My TL;DR is I feel for Jill, who must see everyone else around her doing social media effortlessly, and she just... can't.  And it's not her fault - she doesn't seem to have anyone who can help her improve.

[WhatWouldJohnCrichtonDo?]

2 hours ago, kiwi said:

Why would the Dullards attend their sister in laws brothers wedding??? 

If my sister in laws brother got married id not be invited!

When my sister's husband's sister got married, I was invited. (She's my brother-in-law's sister, so it's a similar relationship as OfJill to Deena's brother.) Of course, in the 8 years between my sister's wedding to her brother and her wedding, we had gotten to know each other and hung out at various get-togethers for our mutual family. So, not exactly the same thing.

[Nargus]

3 hours ago, kiwi said:

Why would the Dullards attend their sister in laws brothers wedding??? 

If my sister in laws brother got married id not be invited!

 

Are fundie weddings an “invite everyone you know and their dog” events? 

Fundie weddings do seem to tend to be like that but based on the garter toss that doesn’t seem like a fundie wedding to me. 

But really like @WhatWouldJohnCrichtonDo? said it depends on the relationship between them.

I invited our brother in law’s parents to our wedding. (As in my husband’s sisters parents in-law). 

[VelociRapture]

Photo from the wedding off of Cathy’s Instagram:

(And before anyone mentions Cathy’s counting skills, she’s counting Dan and Deena’s currently gestating son.)

[eveandadam]

I think it's so weird, the new dressing style of hers, the not bashing the movie, Derick's instagram-7witter ( ? ) not private anymore...Do they have a new PR-team?

And I am so confused about the new dress code, really. Showing shoulders, knees, together with a low cut top? What has happened, I'm sorry, but that's so very strange... Even in the most liberal countries on earth that outfit would not be common unless there's extreme heat involved. And that comes from me, who lives in a town with "nudist zones". It's more like an outfit you wear at home, or gardening or something, but not outside.

Next: Jill in a bikini? (Try say that 10 times really fast)

I have the impession that Jill is overdoing it, like new fundamentalists who go really radical in their lifestyle for the first few years they are in just to proove they belong.

I think Jinger made wiser less modest choices, by showing not everything at the same time.

I don't want to bash Jill here because it's a step outside of what she was brought to, which is great. But I would like to put it in a perspective that  this is not how less modest people dress normally. Her hiking outfit is very liberal and "unmodest" and I wish there was a way to tell her that. Jilly: The line between modest and not modest is very very thin and the difference is less extrem than you might think.

 

 

 

[SapphireSlytherin]

5 minutes ago, eveandadam said:

Even in the most liberal countries on earth that outfit would not be common unless there's extreme heat involved. And that comes from me, who lives in a town with "nudist zones". It's more like an outfit you wear at home, or gardening or something, but not outside.

 

Hm. I see this type of outfit all day, every day, during warm weather. I live in the MidWest USA, typically a conservative environment. 

Shorts and a tank aren't "out there" at all.

[ScorpiousMalfoy]

55 minutes ago, VelociRapture said:

Photo from the wedding off of Cathy’s Instagram:

(And before anyone mentions Cathy’s counting skills, she’s counting Dan and Deena’s currently gestating son.)

Jill looks really cute in that dress!

[VelociRapture]

13 minutes ago, SapphireSlytherin said:

Hm. I see this type of outfit all day, every day, during warm weather. I live in the MidWest USA, typically a conservative environment. 

Shorts and a tank aren't "out there" at all.

I’m in New England and Jill’s outfit is pretty normal attire here too for warm weather. 

20 minutes ago, eveandadam said:

I think it's so weird, the new dressing style of hers, the not bashing the movie, Derick's instagram-7witter ( ? ) not private anymore...Do they have a new PR-team?

And I am so confused about the new dress code, really. Showing shoulders, knees, together with a low cut top? What has happened, I'm sorry, but that's so very strange... Even in the most liberal countries on earth that outfit would not be common unless there's extreme heat involved. And that comes from me, who lives in a town with "nudist zones". It's more like an outfit you wear at home, or gardening or something, but not outside.

Next: Jill in a bikini? (Try say that 10 times really fast)

I have the impession that Jill is overdoing it, like new fundamentalists who go really radical in their lifestyle for the first few years they are in just to proove they belong.

I think Jinger made wiser less modest choices, by showing not everything at the same time.

I don't want to bash Jill here because it's a step outside of what she was brought to, which is great. But I would like to put it in a perspective that  this is not how less modest people dress normally. Her hiking outfit is very liberal and "unmodest" and I wish there was a way to tell her that. Jilly: The line between modest and not modest is very very thin and the difference is less extrem than you might think.

 

 

 

If you have to say you aren’t trying to bash someone for doing something, you likely are about to or just have bashed them. 

I honestly am so confused by your post though. Jill is dressed fairly appropriately for the weather and occasion (hiking.) The sole issue I have with the outfit are her sandals, but even those are a million times better than wearing flip flops for hiking. 

And since you mentioned Jinger, here’s a comparison:

Both are showing their knees and shoulders. Jill’s top is lower cut, but Jinger’s outfit is much more fitted to her body. Both are dressed 100% appropriately for the weather and activities they’re about to enjoy (hiking and tennis.)

Jill looks fine. Jinger looks fine. Can we focus on criticizing these young women for their dangerous beliefs rather than shaming them for wearing appropriate outfits they feel comfortable wearing?

[Cheetah]

1 hour ago, VelociRapture said:

Photo from the wedding off of Cathy’s Instagram:

(And before anyone mentions Cathy’s counting skills, she’s counting Dan and Deena’s currently gestating son.)

woah, Cathy, stop going crazy with the hashtags :-).  Took me a minute to parse that last one.  Israel's A Man and ... nope, LOL.

[JillyO]

 

1 hour ago, eveandadam said:

I think it's so weird, the new dressing style of hers, the not bashing the movie, Derick's instagram-7witter ( ? ) not private anymore...Do they have a new PR-team?

And I am so confused about the new dress code, really. Showing shoulders, knees, together with a low cut top? What has happened, I'm sorry, but that's so very strange... Even in the most liberal countries on earth that outfit would not be common unless there's extreme heat involved. And that comes from me, who lives in a town with "nudist zones". It's more like an outfit you wear at home, or gardening or something, but not outside.

Next: Jill in a bikini? (Try say that 10 times really fast)

I have the impession that Jill is overdoing it, like new fundamentalists who go really radical in their lifestyle for the first few years they are in just to proove they belong.

I think Jinger made wiser less modest choices, by showing not everything at the same time.

I don't want to bash Jill here because it's a step outside of what she was brought to, which is great. But I would like to put it in a perspective that  this is not how less modest people dress normally. Her hiking outfit is very liberal and "unmodest" and I wish there was a way to tell her that. Jilly: The line between modest and not modest is very very thin and the difference is less extrem than you might think.

I am SOOO confused by your post. Her shorts are both longer and looser than 95% of shorts I see on other people her/our age. This length and fit is much more common:

Spoiler

Her top, while lower-cut than most Duggar-approved tops, does not show even a hint of cleavage and is very loose and flowy. Here are some more common summer outfits for people our age:

Spoiler

 

I would consider Jill's outfit more modest (and a lot less stylish, but I digress) than any of those under the spoiler tags - and yet those are perfectly common summer outfits. Aren't you German, @eveandadam? Yeah, those are definitely common summer outfits in Germany. Not sure where you spend your summers if you think most young people wear more modest clothes than Jill's hiking outfit.

Apart from that, as @VelociRapture said: Maybe try to focus on criticizing the Dillards' horrid beliefs, rather than Jill's clothing choices, which certainly don't hurt anyone.

 

[Markie]

I think Jill and her family look lovely in the wedding photo. Too bad about their beliefs. I wonder how often the Duggar sister said or Bates sisters cringe when they look at older family pictures with clown dresses and bloomers? 

[nausicaa]

55 minutes ago, JillyO said:

I would consider Jill's outfit more modest (and a lot less stylish, but I digress) than any of those under the spoiler tags - and yet those are perfectly common summer outfits. Aren't you German, @eveandadam? Yeah, those are definitely common summer outfits in Germany. Not sure where you spend your summers if you think most young people wear more modest clothes than Jill's hiking outfit.

 I was confused by her post too and thought maybe it was a German thing that people just don't wear above the knee shorts. I was just composing a post reminding everyone of how damn hot it can get in the U.S. in the summer. 

Because the outfits I wear to go running in the summer (when it's 90 freaking degrees) are waaay less modest than Jill's outfit (think fitted halter top and athletic shorts the length of the denim shorts under your first spoiler). And I run on some pretty popular hiking trails. Jill's outfit would fall on the modest end of the spectrum. Some female runners wear only a sports bra and spandex shorts that end right below the butt cheek. Again--it's really, really hot out. 

[Gillyweed]

To reiterate how hot areas of America can get-- for the last month and a half it's been 26-32 degrees celcius where I live. I'm further north than the Duggars, so it wouldn't suprise me if it was hotter in Arkansas. And then there's the humidity. I don't know how humid european countries are, but I was literally drenched in sweat after walking around my neighborhood for 10 minutes. 

And July's going to be even hotter. 

[Daisy0322]

3 hours ago, eveandadam said:

 

And I am so confused about the new dress code, really. Showing shoulders, knees, together with a low cut top? What has happened, I'm sorry, but that's so very strange... Even in the most liberal countries on earth that outfit would not be common unless there's extreme heat involved. And that comes from me, who lives in a town with "nudist zones". It's more like an outfit you wear at home, or gardening or something, but not outside.

Next: Jill in a bikini? (Try say that 10 times really fast)

I have the impession that Jill is overdoing it, like new fundamentalists who go really radical in their lifestyle for the first few years they are in just to proove they belong.

I think Jinger made wiser less modest choices, by showing not everything at the same time.

I don't want to bash Jill here because it's a step outside of what she was brought to, which is great. But I would like to put it in a perspective that  this is not how less modest people dress normally. Her hiking outfit is very liberal and "unmodest" and I wish there was a way to tell her that. Jilly: The line between modest and not modest is very very thin and the difference is less extrem than you might think.

 

 

 

I'm not sure where you live but here in the Bible Belt that outfit it Sunday church worthy...especially if paired with nice Sandels. It's finger tip length, wide shoulder straps, and has a collar bone neck line.

[RubyRei]

12 hours ago, candygirl200413 said:

So I do like her outfit but my Yankee self is coming out I guess cause hiking I'd be covered at least with the legs cause ticks and whatnot!

This made me unreasonably happy because TICKS ARE SO DANGEROUS AND DESTROY LIVES Y’ALL!!!!! 

@Gillyweed It is SO hot here in Florida. The other day it was 97* and i don’t even want to know what the heat index  was. I live in a not so fancy area (to say the least) and the only way I can mildly function in my apartment is blasting the shitty AC, always having a fan on, light blocking curtains in the bedroom and black garbage bags and curtains on all the other windows. It. Is. Miserable. Forget going outside ::blech::

[SorenaJ]

Jill’s outfit looks fairly modest to me. Not too modest for a fundie, but modest for the general population.  This is what most people wear here (just with shorter shorts) 

[melon]

It's hot here in SC,too.I dread my next electric bill.Mr Melon insists on a frigid AC setting.He'd rather be comfortable ,now..and pay for it..later.My sons defend him because he works outside on a golf course.It's not that I am totally unsympathetic,for years,I worked in a warehouse..cold in the winter ,and hot in the summer..and days like today,I would have been miserable..I just think he could turn it up a bit..we have ceiling fans,in almost every room.

[RubyRei]

@melon I tend to keep the AC at what I think is a reasonable temperature (77-78 but right now it’s 75 so I don’t die!! It’s also really old and not very efficient unfortunately), but my boyfriend would almost always have it warmer if it weren’t for me. In all fairness, I am very very heat sensitive and if I feel hot in the house for an extended period of time it will literally make me feel sick :/ But yeah... electric bills are no fun ):

[feministxtian]

4 hours ago, eveandadam said:

Even in the most liberal countries on earth that outfit would not be common unless there's extreme heat involved. And that comes from me, who lives in a town with "nudist zones". It's more like an outfit you wear at home, or gardening or something, but not outside.

I live in the desert southwest of the USA. Jill's outfit is a common sort of outfit here from April to October. It gets chilly from December-February, so pants & jackets are common. As soon as it goes above about 70F, the shorts/tanktops come out again. One day last week it was 113F here. It's running 105-110F for daytime highs and we'll have those highs from now until some time in September. 

Now, I don't wear shorts in public...has something to do with being fat. I wear loose skirts and tank tops. 

So, Jill's outfit would be on about 90% of the women you see in the grocery store on any given day during the season. 

[Rachel333]

I think it's kind of ridiculous to say she's copying Jinger just based on her clothes. All Jill has done is appear in a photo wearing shorts, so if she gets accused of being disingenuous just from that then there is no way a Duggar sister can publicly wear pants and not be seen as trying to copy her sister.  I also think I'd be incredibly annoyed if I got accused of only doing things to copy my sister!

I also don't think it would reflect poorly on anyone if Jinger's influence made the other sisters feel more comfortable wearing pants, but the way people are talking about it make it sound less like that and more like they think Jill is only wearing pants because she wants attention like Jinger.

[Lurky]

I can't actually believe someone from Germany would think that outfit is immodest, as I've traveled in small towns in East Germany in July that aren't tourist destinations, and been to Berlin, and have seen people in shorts and vests (I just pulled out my photos to check).  Definitely saw people in a lot fewer clothes on Borkum (a German seaside resort island).

As for other western European countries - I can't see anyone blinking at that in Netherlands, Belgium, Luxembourg, France, etc - and the idea that those would be shocking clothes in Mediterranean countries is just making me laugh.

For proof - check out the outfits people are wearing on these sites promoting hiking in Germany.  Sure, there are a lot of short-sleeved shirts, but that's more for sun protection than modesty, and there are a ton of shots of women in shorts and vests too.

http://www.germany.travel/en/leisure-and-recreation/hiking/hiking.html

http://danube.travel/upload/documents/NFI_DanubeHIKE_Brosch_ENG_OK_05.pdf

https://www.blackforest-tourism.com/discovery/hiking/Easy-Hiker

(Now I want to go hiking in Germany - so pretty!)

 

[Don'tlikekoolaid]

I think Jill and Derick are getting helpful advice from the elders at Cross Church and from the young people they are mixing with. Glad to see it.  They are still steeped in hateful beliefs though.