Boyer Sisters Part 7: One Still Creative

[FilleMondaine]

On 8/29/2019 at 5:52 AM, Palimpsest said:

I just agreed with both @FilleMondaine and @apandaaries, which may seem contradictory.   I thought they both made very good points.  

I don't think that they are contradictory. We both recognize that he is (thankfully for Brigid) in a different class than other men in his subculture. He is a "work in progress" as @apandaaries says, and I quite agree. We just differ on the details.

[formergothardite]

Just now, FilleMondaine said:

I don't think that they are contradictory. We both recognize that he is (thankfully for Brigid) in a different class than other men in his subculture.

I have to say fundie patriarchs like Gil Bates and even Jim Bob seem to absolutely adore their wives and allow them to make life choices. IME the super hateful guys are not the norm. They get a ton of attention because they are so awful, but there are plenty of Gils and Gabes.] in this subculture. 

I just don't know that Gabe is a rare one in how he treats his wife. I do think most of the men have a less of a sense of humor when reading snark on their lives, but that isn't just a fundie thing, most people wouldn't take it with humor. 

 

[JermajestyDuggar]

25 minutes ago, formergothardite said:

I have to say fundie patriarchs like Gil Bates and even Jim Bob seem to absolutely adore their wives and allow them to make life choices. IME the super hateful guys are not the norm. They get a ton of attention because they are so awful, but there are plenty of Gils and Gabes.] in this subculture. 

I just don't know that Gabe is a rare one in how he treats his wife. I do think most of the men have a less of a sense of humor when reading snark on their lives, but that isn't just a fundie thing, most people wouldn't take it with humor. 

 

Ahhhh and there’s the brilliance of the patriarchy in fundie land. Men don’t actually have to keep their wives in line. There are plenty of other women to do that for him. The women are raised to believe in submission to men and to follow strict gender roles. And then as adults shame other women into staying in line. Women like Lori, Jill, Zoo, and Girl Defined come right to mind. And don’t forget all the women in your church and fundie social circles. JB and Gil never had to keep their wives in line. Of course there are some men that help to keep them in line like Gothard, pastors, and other fundie personalities. But for the day to day stuff, you’ll likely get the most shaming from other women in your life. The men hardly ever have to get their hands dirty with any of that.

[hoipolloi]

2 hours ago, nausicaa said:

So I get it's scammy, but what's the scam? Like, how do they make any money out of this? Is anyone familiar enough with this type of thing to hazard a guess?

There is so little information on that website  -- no backgrounds for the company's staff or principals, no specific property descriptions, no data on the company's finances -- I can't believe that anyone with half a brain would give them the time of day, let alone money. They imply that they're experts in real estate. So who are they and what are their specific qualifications & records in buying/selling property? 

That all said (again), I'm going to guess that their small print stipulation ("All properties are sold for cash or hard money. Buyers responsibility to do your own due diligence and verify all information. Prices are NET to seller with buyer paying all closing costs. ") allows them to avoid some financial headaches through insisting on cash-only sales. Still, it's hard to believe they have a clientele of any size at all.

Edited September 3, 2019 by hoipolloi

[AmazonGrace]

"it's not worth what we tell you it's worth and we try to avoid paying taxes"?

[WhatWouldJohnCrichtonDo?]

13 hours ago, Palimpsest said:

Seriously, @Gabe, you are a teddy bear compared to other vitriolic Fundies who have visited us here.  And that is a compliment.

As an added bonus, he didn't get inappropriate and offer to send someone M&Ms.

13 hours ago, formergothardite said:

I do think most of the men have a less of a sense of humor when reading snark on their lives, but that isn't just a fundie thing, most people wouldn't take it with humor. 

I shudder to think of the skewering FJ could give me over some of the choices I've made in my life. Then again, I don't publicize my life as an example for other people to imitate. 

Edited September 3, 2019 by WhatWouldJohnCrichtonDo?
clarification

[FilleMondaine]

15 hours ago, Gabe said:

 Brigid and children are doing well. 

I am still very amused at your imaginative view of me.

I am glad to hear that your family is well.

And I can only imagine what it must feel to have other people talk about an online personality in a personal way. That's why I am totally off social media, and use a pseudonym, here. Owning a blog especially--but instagram and twitter too--give a tacit consent for other people to interpret and comment. 

Still, your culture has personally affected many here in a negative way. So when a person from such a culture becomes public--usually in a way to 'teach' other people--it is important to point out the unhelpful ways of thinking. Of course, that conversation becomes even more pointed when the person in question engages here in FJ.

I don't know you, personally, and have never written to anyone, before. Still, looking at the positive is a large part of my life. And I want to thank you, as a woman, for being respectful of your wife and sister-in-law's boundaries. 

[JermajestyDuggar]

Jessica posted to her Instagram for the first time since last year. She wrote about her big move with her new husband. Then today she posted this. I have to agree with her. Lives change. You can’t keep blogging about the same stuff if you just aren’t interested in it any longer. I think blog readers need to realize that blogs are like tv shows. They can’t last forever. And sometimes if they last too long, it gets really really bad. And that’s when Fonzie jumps a shark. No one wants their favorite blogger to jump the shark. 

Edited November 13, 2019 by JermajestyDuggar

[browngrl]

I can understand why the Boyers have stopped blogging. In general blogging has fallen out of favour and many people have left blogging, but I read their blog a long time and I can't help but be curious about how they are doing now.

However, my personal curiosity aside, I do wish that more former fundie bloggers would return to discuss how things turned out for them. I think the SAHD lifestyle is problematic and IMO many young fundie girls seemed boxed in and sad and things only got better once they started to venture into the wide world.  At one point these girls used their blogs as a soap box to promote their fundie ideas (even it was only by posing in a pretty way and sharing patterns and recipes) and now I wish that more of them felt the responsibility to show people how it worked out for them.

This being said I  wish the Boyers well. 

[FilleMondaine]

So....did anyone else notice an absence of the formerly-ubiquitous God-stuff?

(Fingers crossed that part of the growing also meant growing out of unhealthy fundamentalist mindsets)

[jozina]

I hope so too. Of the three I have the most hope for Jessica.  There's still some God talk on her instagram but I hope the fundamentalism is gone at least.

[FilleMondaine]

Sorry-I shouldn't say "God talk", which can be a wonderful and positive language. What I am referencing would be better described as obsequious virtue-signalling.

I hope that the fundamentalism is gone, too, @jozina, and especially for her, because she seems to be the most hurt by it.

[FreeMiriam]

On one hand, I'd like to see updates on their lives, on the other it's understandable that they grew out of the vintage aesthetic and ultra Christian values. Glad to see a post without excessive mentions of God. 

Also, is Charlotte pregnant? She has "Mama becoming" on her Instagram bio.

[NachosFlandersStyle]

39 minutes ago, FreeMiriam said:

"Mama becoming" on her Instagram bio.

Does she have a new Instagram account? The one I'm seeing hasn't been updated recently.

[JermajestyDuggar]

4 minutes ago, NachosFlandersStyle said:

Does she have a new Instagram account? The one I'm seeing hasn't been updated recently.

It’s this one and it’s private: 

[FilleMondaine]

What a name: "Mrs Brandyberry". It sounds so cheery, domestic, and like a jolly character in a Dickens novel. It would honestly be a good brand name.

Seems like (as far as we know), every one is happy, healthy, and more in control of their persons and online presence. That's swell.

Edited November 19, 2019 by FilleMondaine
forgot to put the words "as far as we know", which is important because I don't think that any of us are interested in prying unethically.

[justmy2cents]

Ok. Mama becoming is a strange way to refer to a pregnancy.

[JermajestyDuggar]

12 hours ago, FilleMondaine said:

What a name: "Mrs Brandyberry". It sounds so cheery, domestic, and like a jolly character in a Dickens novel. It would honestly be a good brand name.

Seems like (as far as we know), every one is happy, healthy, and more in control of their persons and online presence. That's swell.

Charlotte and Elijah Brandyberry sound like hobbits to me. 

[JermajestyDuggar]

Brigid made a post on her blog saying she had a daughter in July and hoping I get back into her blogging.

https://brijeepatterns.wordpress.com/2019/11/21/can-you-hear-me/

[anachronistic]

That baby will be one of the most cutely dressed children in the country, that’s for sure. I love old fashioned things on little girls, even if it makes me a bad feminist/lesbian. I just do. I know that Bridget doesn’t post photos of her kids much, but I do hope for some photos of the clothes at least.

[FilleMondaine]

19 hours ago, anachronistic said:

That baby will be one of the most cutely dressed children in the country, that’s for sure. I love old fashioned things on little girls, even if it makes me a bad feminist/lesbian. I just do. I know that Bridget doesn’t post photos of her kids much, but I do hope for some photos of the clothes at least.

All together, now....SQUEEEEE!

While it is certainly anti-feminist to whitewash history, I admit a fondness for sturdy and well-made clothing on children. Cheap and disposable (and often sexualised) children's clothing hurts women on so many intersecting levels: hurting the bodies of women and children in 3rd world countries due to dangerous factories and climate change while harming the minds of women and children in the US by narrowing gender expectations and promoting materialism.

So see, @anachronistic?? You get to keep your feminism card.

[ViolaSebastian]

My mother is quite the seamstress and made tons of absolutely adorable clothes for me when I was a little girl. She learned to smock (who on earth learns to smock when she was a 1 year old and a 7 year old??) and those outfits are honestly my most treasured childhood possessions. Congratulations, @Gabe and Brigid.

[Palimpsest]

1 hour ago, ViolaSebastian said:

My mother is quite the seamstress and made tons of absolutely adorable clothes for me when I was a little girl. She learned to smock (who on earth learns to smock when she was a 1 year old and a 7 year old??) and those outfits are honestly my most treasured childhood possessions. Congratulations, @Gabe and Brigid.

I hope that was a typo and you meant had a 1 year old and seven year old.  Otherwise your mother was an incredibly gifted infant.  

I used to be able to smock and embroider quite well although I haven't done any for years.  I still have a little smocking pleater block I use for crafts instead of smocking these days.

 I was taught to sew by my mother who made me some very pretty dresses.  I didn't like to wear them much because they inhibited play and tree climbing.  After the age of 5 or so we were supposed to be old enough to be ladylike and not expose our panties ever.  Yes, I was pretty much skirts-only until my teens and leggings hadn't been invented.  I actually feel a bit jealous of little girls today wearing comfortable looking leggings and tee shirts --especially when combined with a fluffy tutu. 

The Brigabriel babes will undoubtedly have lovely clothes and I hope Brigid blogs some of them.  But to be truly historically accurate if Gabe and Brigie are taking the babes to reenactments, boys and girls both used to wear white dresses until the boys were around 5 and "breeched."  And plenty of boys wore pink until the 1940s.  The rule was pink for boys and blue for girls before then.

http://www.todayifoundout.com/index.php/2014/10/pink-used-common-color-boys-blue-girls/

 

[Gabe]

Quote

 But to be truly historically accurate if Gabe and Brigie are taking the babes to reenactments, boys and girls both used to wear white dresses until the boys were around 5 and "breeched."  And plenty of boys wore pink until the 1940s.  The rule was pink for boys and blue for girls before then.

Aedan will wear gowns until at least 4. (at events) Those gowns don't have to be white,

https://archive.triblive.com/local/westmoreland/14171588-74/history-on-display-at-fort-ligonier-days

Edited November 25, 2019 by Gabe
Added news link

[JermajestyDuggar]

I like Aedan’s little hat. My babies always wore hats because I produce very bald babies.