Best Courtship Stories?

[Georgiana]

3 minutes ago, Palimpsest said:

From Kristina's old blog:  http://kristinaskeeps.blogspot.com/2009/02/engagement-pictures.html

Oh my.  She really has grown up since then.

Kristina has been a member here since yuku.  She pops in sometimes to set us straight.  Look under "Kristina & Josh Carter" in the Families and Individuals section.

She's also REALLY done a 180, based what people who view her FB page have said.  She wears pants and make up now, her kids are enrolled in an actual school, and they seem to practice some form of family planning.  I've always admired her for her willingness to confront opposition and defend her beliefs, but now she seems like someone I would actually like to be friends with.

The thing about Kristina is that she is self-aware.  She REALIZED her short-comings, REALIZED the ways in which her upbringing contributed to those, and chose NOT to inflict that same damage onto her kids.  That couldn't have been easy.  That's a lot of painful self-reflection and many people from ALL walks of life choose to avoid self-reflection like that.  But Kristina didn't.  Instead, she bucked her childhood and chose to do better by her kids.  In the end, that's really all we can ask of any parent.  

I've always said she had the biggest lady-balls of anyone we discuss here, and I'm glad to see her escape.

For those of you wondering about the BRADRICK! rabbit hole, the blog article below does a really great job of summing everything up through their courtship and early marriage.  It's quite succinct (well, as succinct as you can be over several years of events) and worth a read, though you do miss out on Dougie's WIDE STANCE.  From there, they largely go dark until the divorce, which you can read about in the threads here.  

http://ingridgraceandaudrey.blogspot.com/2012/06/portrait-of-lady.html

If you want to skip straight to the meat of the divorce and ignore all the idle speculation, @Palimpsest broke it down for us here:

I think once you go down the BRADRICK! rabbit hole you'll see why I constantly bring it up when people say of other couples "Oh, they'll never get divorced because of their values."  It's by no means guaranteed.  If you want to know how much of a big deal this wedding was, pop "Kelly Brown Bradrick" into your search bar and find ALL the results that just slobber all over the knob of that wedding.  

And yet....here we are.

[Palimpsest]

38 minutes ago, Georgiana said:

She's also REALLY done a 180, based what people who view her FB page have said.  She wears pants and make up now, her kids are enrolled in an actual school, and they seem to practice some form of family planning.  I've always admired her for her willingness to confront opposition and defend her beliefs, but now she seems like someone I would actually like to be friends with.

Well, Kristina and I go way back to yuku .  She's driven me up the wall because I've always seen so much potential in her!  We've gone nose to nose a few times, and she has acquitted herself well in debates with even more challenging members than I.  Particularly  @formergothardite and @treemom, although there are many others.

I have sincerely rejoiced as she has made changes.  Some credit for the changes may be due to discussions on FJ - but I doubt it.  I think her intelligence, the reality of her situation - trying to bring up all those kids on a single income, her health, and what happened to her parents' and brother's marriages - may have had something to do with it.  She has always refused to discus her parents and brother, and I agree with her and respect her for that.  Still, the wreckage of their lives and marriages must have affected her.  And Josh.  Perhaps.

I'd put it at a 160 rather than a 180 - I'd like to see her go further and reach her full potential - but that is what I meant by "she's really grown up."

I'm not sure I'd want to be friends with Kristina.  There are still some poisonous beliefs there.  But I definitely praise her for how far she has come.

[closetcagebaby]

7 hours ago, Jingeyk said:

Ask and ye shall receive (I hope this link works)

https://docs.google.com/presentation/d/12DVTVd3SJWy0TQ-KgqCeblHdxIdG4jdhcBJeVyWgAgI/edit#slide=id.i0

So weird to me that she quotes from a Mormon church president! That seems very un-fundie to me. 

[Fascinated]

7 hours ago, scoutsadie said:

Y'all. If you take time time to read Jessiqua's story, I think it's also worth your time to read @Burris's commentary about it - really well-articulated "WTF?"

It's a few years old and I wasn't given the option to upvote it, but Brava, @Burris, brava.

Gah. I can’t read Burris anymore. She deluded me, and one of our former disgruntled members (Beb, probably) quoted my patheticness (?) on GOMI!  It’s interesting that she and DGayle are both prominent in that thread.  Ah, FJ. So strange yet so informative. 

 Sorry for interruption.  Am enjoying everyone’s comments and knowledge. 

[nickelodeon]

6 hours ago, Anonymousguest said:

I didn't read all 900 parts of Jessaqua's story. Was the guy previously married? Did he have children? Are they the adopted adult children she mentioned somewhere? I couldn't find this information skimming. 

I don't know if he was ever married, but in a recent thread @NachosFlandersStyle found out that the dude had multiple restraining orders from different women by the time he met Jessiqua.  

[VVV]

3 hours ago, closetcagebaby said:

So weird to me that she quotes from a Mormon church president! That seems very un-fundie to me. 

ThatWife was Mormon at the time.

[Hane]

12 hours ago, VVV said:

ThatWife was Mormon at the time.

And that, in huge part, was the reason for the PowerPoint proposal and the sad tale of Bathroom Baby. Heterosexual marriage—and having kids—is a theological cornerstone of Mormonism. A Mormon who is not married, and married in a Mormon temple, cannot attain the highest level of Heaven, the Celestial Kingdom, after death. The LDS Church puts a huge emphasis on families  being together in the afterlife. 

And there you have how ThatWife’s life became such a trainwreck. She obviously was constitutionally unequipped for marriage or motherhood, but her religion gave her no other options.

[Briefly]

On 3/12/2018 at 6:32 PM, Georgiana said:

She's also REALLY done a 180, based what people who view her FB page have said.  She wears pants and make up now, her kids are enrolled in an actual school, and they seem to practice some form of family planning.  I've always admired her for her willingness to confront opposition and defend her beliefs, but now she seems like someone I would actually like to be friends with.

The thing about Kristina is that she is self-aware.  She REALIZED her short-comings, REALIZED the ways in which her upbringing contributed to those, and chose NOT to inflict that same damage onto her kids.  That couldn't have been easy.  That's a lot of painful self-reflection and many people from ALL walks of life choose to avoid self-reflection like that.  But Kristina didn't.  Instead, she bucked her childhood and chose to do better by her kids.  In the end, that's really all we can ask of any parent.  

I've always said she had the biggest lady-balls of anyone we discuss here, and I'm glad to see her escape.

She is actually how I first heard of FJ, in her old blog when she was talking about. I think she is someone I would like a lot in real life. She did not have the educational opportunities that she should have or at least that is what I gathered, but I think she is very intelligent. I also think she deeply loves her children and is a very good mother. I respect the fact that she doesn't really talk about her parents or brother's problems, or even her sister. That is very classy. Because we made a misguided and very regretted attempt at fundamentalism, I feel like I have a little "kinship" for lack of a better work with her mother because I think her mother came into fundamentalism as an adult and possibly after she got married, and (my opnion only) is that it was a failure for her/them.  I hope that Kirstina's mother is ok.  And I hope Kistina is ok, she talks about having anxiety attacks on her facebook page. Those are tough, I've had a few of my own.

[closetcagebaby]

22 hours ago, VVV said:

ThatWife was Mormon at the time.

I see! I’m not really familiar with her. 

[scoutsadie]

On 3/12/2018 at 6:03 PM, Palimpsest said:

Kendalyn.  Most unenthusiastic bride ever until she was overtaken by Kathryn in the cold feet stakes!  What is it about those Staddons that inspires such passion apathy.

Most of my other favorites have already been covered above but Meredith and Stephen Hammer's courtship and wedding were pretty good.  Rhodes scholar just stumbled on his Fundie bride while surfing the net.  And their wedding was OTT with the flower girl dress and 27 bellringers!  My summary here (scroll down the page): 

Photos saved here, thanks to @DomWackTroll.

 https://www.datalounge.com/thread/10006793-dominion-wackiness-post-of-the-week-the-wedding-of-meredith-and-stephen

The Maxwell failed courtships are far more interesting than their successful ones.  Unfortunately they swiffered all the evidence from their blog.  I can't remember much about the Christopher and Sara Smith failed courtship, and threads about it must be buried back on yuku.

But here is poor Joe getting dumped a week before the wedding by Elizabeth Munck.  She missed a bullet!

Nathan and Christopher's success stories are boring, and the most interesting thing about Joseph's courtship and wedding with Elissa was that it was so super-secret.  I don't think we ever got a courtship story there.

John's courtship and wedding are really recent - see Maxhell.  Most memorable things about them are: 

• Steve getting his nose put out of joint because the Bontragers didn't keep the engagement super-secret,
• the preaching about Steve's scrotum at the wedding. 
• Oh, and Chels going barefoot down the aisle in Iowa in January.

An honorable mention though of a a really awful Fundie marriage and a shout out to some parents who stood up for their daughter, got her out, and rethought their beliefs. 

Autumn was married at 16 with parental encouragement and approval to a guy who turned out to be hugely abusive almost immediately.  I haven't checked in on her recently but I wish her all success.

This is a thread about her rescue and recovery. 

 

Good example of how Burris did sometimes make sense before she went completely off the rails.

Thanks, @Palimpsest - and I half-remember seeing something go down regarding Burris, but couldn't recall what (and since I read old threads sometimes, couldn't remember how long ago the kerfluffle was)...sorry that my quote stirred bad stuff up for you and @Fascinated. 

I thought I remembered reading at least one older and successful (yet still WTF) Maxwell courtin' tale, but I may be thinking of the wedding posts with their standard weirdness (rehearsal dinner shenanigans, death sermons, sitting shiva for Nathan post-wedding, etc).

[NachosFlandersStyle]

On 3/12/2018 at 7:36 PM, Fascinated said:

Gah. I can’t read Burris anymore. 

Yeah, even in the post linked here-- she makes some really good points, but it's also really navel-gazing with long meandering digressions about her (probably fictional) personal life. It's hard to read knowing just how much she was spinning tales, and how fucking weird she got with it.

[Flossie]

I'd just become aware of Burris when she went nuclear.  After being burned by Razing Ruth I stayed out of it when Burris suddenly 'came clean' with her tragic tale of being a camp guard in some country who did unspeakable things and was soon to go on trial by a tribunal somewhere and wanted everyone to know she was sorry and etc. and etc.

Is there a brief synopsis of the Burris character, what tripped her up, and if anyone knows what she's up to today?  Probably got some new scam online somewhere, which we likely wouldn't know about, but what if she got help and is now living quietly in, Canada, I think?  Didn't someone find that she lived in Canada?

[Fascinated]

46 minutes ago, Flossie said:

I'd just become aware of Burris when she went nuclear.  After being burned by Razing Ruth I stayed out of it when Burris suddenly 'came clean' with her tragic tale of being a camp guard in some country who did unspeakable things and was soon to go on trial by a tribunal somewhere and wanted everyone to know she was sorry and etc. and etc.

Is there a brief synopsis of the Burris character, what tripped her up, and if anyone knows what she's up to today?  Probably got some new scam online somewhere, which we likely wouldn't know about, but what if she got help and is now living quietly in, Canada, I think?  Didn't someone find that she lived in Canada?

I wonder what she’s up to also. I wonder if she’s here. 

[Palimpsest]

5 hours ago, scoutsadie said:

Thanks, @Palimpsest - and I half-remember seeing something go down regarding Burris, but couldn't recall what (and since I read old threads sometimes, couldn't remember how long ago the kerfluffle was)...sorry that my quote stirred bad stuff up for you and @Fascinated. 

I thought I remembered reading at least one older and successful (yet still WTF) Maxwell courtin' tale, but I may be thinking of the wedding posts with their standard weirdness (rehearsal dinner shenanigans, death sermons, sitting shiva for Nathan post-wedding, etc).

No worries at all @scoutsadie.  Burris is water under the bridge.  I only meant that the fact she often made sense made her long con more effective.  So when she finally dropped the hammer we fell for it.  We live and learn.

Re. the Maxwells:  Yes.  I think you mean Teri's extraordinarily detailed and long-winded account of Nathan's wedding.  Where the servers screwed up the seating plan and the whole family wept copiously because he and Melanie were riding off into the sunset never to be seen again moving to a house on the other side of the road.  Or when Steve preached about DEATH at Christopher's wedding.

The last time we snarked on Teri's post Steve wiped it from Titus2.  He's such a party pooper.  Someone found it on the Wayback Machine though and posted a link in one of the John and Chelsy wedding threads.  If I get time today I'll try to find the link.

[mango_fandango]

I remember reading a thread about Burris. It was the biggest bunch of WTF I’ve ever read. I mean, we expect fundies to do crazy shit. But one of our own members???

[Timetraveler]

I honestly still think the Tabitha Paine and Tim Robertson courtship/engagement/marriage is horrible. 

[zeebaneighba]

8 hours ago, scoutsadie said:

Thanks, @Palimpsest - and I half-remember seeing something go down regarding Burris, but couldn't recall what (and since I read old threads sometimes, couldn't remember how long ago the kerfluffle was)...sorry that my quote stirred bad stuff up for you and @Fascinated. 

I thought I remembered reading at least one older and successful (yet still WTF) Maxwell courtin' tale, but I may be thinking of the wedding posts with their standard weirdness (rehearsal dinner shenanigans, death sermons, sitting shiva for Nathan post-wedding, etc).

Excuse my ignorance; I have only the vaguest familiarity with the Maxwells. They sat shiva for Nathan? Because he got married? WTF??

[scoutsadie]

17 minutes ago, zeebaneighba said:

Excuse my ignorance; I have only the vaguest familiarity with the Maxwells. They sat shiva for Nathan? Because he got married? WTF??

@Palimpsest, I found it!  @zeebaneighba, here you go:

http://web.archive.org/web/20020603150842/http://titus2.com/wedding/index.html - see the Our Thoughts and Emotions section.   You're welcome.  

[louisa05]

4 hours ago, scoutsadie said:

@Palimpsest, I found it!  @zeebaneighba, here you go:

http://web.archive.org/web/20020603150842/http://titus2.com/wedding/index.html - see the Our Thoughts and Emotions section.   You're welcome.  

Did I read that right? All that crying drama and letting go drama was over the son moving across the street? You'd think he was moving to Tibet and couldn't visit for ten years. 

[zeebaneighba]

I'll probably cry when my daughters get married because I am happy for them, but not because they are moving out.  Because they both moved out of my house and commenced their own adult lives halfway through college, LIKE NORMAL PEOPLE!

[JermajestyDuggar]

On 3/14/2018 at 10:34 PM, louisa05 said:

Did I read that right? All that crying drama and letting go drama was over the son moving across the street? You'd think he was moving to Tibet and couldn't visit for ten years. 

And yet Sarah made it seem like they barely noticed when john moved out recently...

[Tangy Bee]

Zach Bates 1st failed courtship was hard to watch. I felt that he should of asked Sarah in private instead of making a national scene on tv.  I believe in private she would have let him down easy without cameras, family, and strangers looking on. She clearly was caught off guard and maybe did the polite thing and agreed to the courtship. Zach looked ridiculous running around letting everyone read his texts from Sarah. This was a grown ass man! If fact no grown ass adult needs to group text with parents! Do the Duggars still do this? Please NO.

[JermajestyDuggar]

1 hour ago, Tangy Bee said:

Zach Bates 1st failed courtship was hard to watch. I felt that he should of asked Sarah in private instead of making a national scene on tv.  I believe in private she would have let him down easy without cameras, family, and strangers looking on. She clearly was caught off guard and maybe did the polite thing and agreed to the courtship. Zach looked ridiculous running around letting everyone read his texts from Sarah. This was a grown ass man! If fact no grown ass adult needs to group text with parents! Do the Duggars still do this? Please NO.

It seems to me his failed courtship was a learning experience. I imagine he probably realized that the perfect fundie courtship model was not in fact perfect. So he found himself a non fundie girl at sonic. Good for him. He also set an example of his younger siblings. You can find a mate at non fundie approved places and it still works out. 

I know people like to say Whitney is fundie but I don't think she is. 

[scoutsadie]

On 3/12/2018 at 8:44 PM, nickelodeon said:

I don't know if he was ever married, but in a recent thread @NachosFlandersStyle found out that the dude had multiple restraining orders from different women by the time he met Jessiqua.  

Jessiqua's story mentioned that he had never been married and had thought he would never find a woman. (Maybe that is why he courted a kid?)

[ophelia]

14 hours ago, JermajestyDuggar said:

And yet Sarah made it seem like they barely noticed when john moved out recently...

this was the most honest and real moment on the Maxwell blog in a long time, if you asked me.