Bontragers and Bowers 2

[usedbicycle]

On 9/26/2018 at 4:29 PM, JermajestyDuggar said:

It’s nice that they will have 18 full months of marriage before a baby comes along. 

That was my first reaction too. How nice to experience life as a couple before pregnancy nausea and massive hormonal fluctuations, followed by intense sleep deprivation. Pregnancy is also such a vulnerable/complicated time in terms of body confidence and sex. I couldn't imagine beginning my very first relationship and having to learn all about intimacy while pregnant. 

Then I remembered that these kids are quiverfull and were probably very stressed out that they weren't conceiving. I'm sure there is some degree of shame and guilt when God isn't choosing to give you a blessing, and that positive pregnancy test must have come as a huge relief. 

 

[HereticHick]

On 9/27/2018 at 7:40 AM, Captain Obvious said:

I'm just popping in here to say that Joshua Bontrager meets the very definition of Backpfeifengesicht (a face in need of a punching).

Holy crap I know he's got a lot of competition in fundie land, but he's surely the smuggest douchiest arsehat out there. 

He's got a nice new post about how he proselytized  bothered  Hispanic construction workers while on his honeymoon. Tired construction workers who just wanted to relax with a beer. Instead they got Joshua handing them tracts & telling them they were sinners (even though they were Catholics).  Asshat.

[usedbicycle]

I'm still shaking off the CRINGE from that last post. I can't even....

Quote

 

In that moment, I saw three rough looking Hispanic construction workers about 10 yards away from us.

Besides, these were not the type of guys I would want to talk to with my wife standing by my side.

I left Cassidy in the room, and trudged back unwillingly to witness to these three men. 

 

A racist prejudiced Christian makes a poor, poor Christian indeed. And that is the exact reason I'm not Christian anymore, so I'm never lumped in with people like Joshua.

[NellieBell]

I'm just going to pipe in from the chemo dungeon to add my two cents - which is - these fuckers! 

[mango_fandango]

Ugh, Joshua sounds like a right dick. I mean, lots of guys his age can be arrogant nitwits who think they’re invincible/the shit/and know everything, but the religious fundamentalism makes it x1000 worse. 

[JermajestyDuggar]

I just keep thinking... his poor wife. His poor son. 

[Pianokeeper]

23 minutes ago, JermajestyDuggar said:

I just keep thinking... his poor wife. His poor son. 

Seriously. Even if he were to leave religious fundamentalism, he'd be like Vicki whatsherface -- equally self-important, just in a new sphere.  

I hold out some tiny hope that time might lessen his racism and cartoonish level of small town thinking ("rough looking characters").  

[SoConfused]

This is my first post (and I’m super new to FJ) so I’m sorry if this is the wrong place to ask this, but I just started reading all of these blogs and did the Bowers family literally buy a farm and move to Iowa in order to marry off two of their daughters and then pack up and leave once they had both given birth? Is this a normal thing to happen?

[JermajestyDuggar]

5 minutes ago, SoConfused said:

This is my first post (and I’m super new to FJ) so I’m sorry if this is the wrong place to ask this, but I just started reading all of these blogs and did the Bowers family literally buy a farm and move to Iowa in order to marry off two of their daughters and then pack up and leave once they had both given birth? Is this a normal thing to happen?

It really seems like they did exactly that. And no, I don’t think this is normal fundie stuff. Most fundies stay where they are and their children have long distance relationships. And then the girl moves to where the guy is after the wedding. The only other family that seemed to move for courtship potential is the Swanson’s who moved closer to the Duggars. 

[SoConfused]

9 hours ago, JermajestyDuggar said:

It really seems like they did exactly that. And no, I don’t think this is normal fundie stuff. Most fundies stay where they are and their children have long distance relationships. And then the girl moves to where the guy is after the wedding. The only other family that seemed to move for courtship potential is the Swanson’s who moved closer to the Duggars. 

This is incredible. Not in a “wow, I wish my parents had done that” kind of a way, but seems like such an obvious force/arranged marriage for the daughters. Especially since it seems the parents were instrumental in facilitating the courtships. Not sure why, but I find this so fascinating and I’m glad there are other people who understand!

[JermajestyDuggar]

6 minutes ago, SoConfused said:

This is incredible. Not in a “wow, I wish my parents had done that” kind of a way, but seems like such an obvious force/arranged marriage for the daughters. Especially since it seems the parents were instrumental in facilitating the courtships. Not sure why, but I find this so fascinating and I’m glad there are other people who understand!

When you read the “love stories” of the two sibling pairs, you get the feeling that there was an extreme amount of pressure put on them to match up. That kind of pressure wasn’t placed on Chelsy or Mitchell. They seemed to make their own matches. 

[usedbicycle]

Allison talks about her evening routine of back rubs and story time with her little siblings. They read Beatrix Potter and "shared many laughs over the plight of Tom Kitten". 

These "little siblings" are not 3-6 years old like you would expect, but 11-16! Why are fundies so immature? 

[sleepy_doggos]

Allison talks about her evening routine of back rubs and story time with her little siblings. They read Beatrix Potter and "shared many laughs over the plight of Tom Kitten". 
These "little siblings" are not 3-6 years old like you would expect, but 11-16! Why are fundies so immature? 

Bizarre. I read YA books into my mid twenties but after that they lost appeal.
If their older brother Josh is any example, these children are seriously infantilized. They aren't allowed to grow into adult minds. So sad. What's so wrong with growing into adolescent and adult frames of mind?
I do like that they include touch as part of their routine. Loving touch is so important for connection and I feel like teens, especially in these subcultures where touch is mostly sexual, may not get it enough.

[HereticHick]

27 minutes ago, usedbicycle said:

Allison talks about her evening routine of back rubs and story time with her little siblings. They read Beatrix Potter and "shared many laughs over the plight of Tom Kitten". 

These "little siblings" are not 3-6 years old like you would expect, but 11-16! Why are fundies so immature? 

I'm glad I'm not the only one who picked up on that. I mean, I loves me some naughty Tom Kitten, but I'd never find Beatrix Potter appropriate for a tween!!

[JermajestyDuggar]

I find it beyond weird that so many fundies infantilize their teens and then think it’s great when those same teens get married. Wtf?!

[mango_fandango]

Sarah Maxwell reads to Anna and Mary before bed. 

Mary is 22 and Anna is nearly 26.

 

And Sarah is 36.

[browngrl]

I still read Beatrix Potter*, but I save it for no good, very bad days when it is all I can do to not curl up in a fetal position and just start screaming in anger/panic/frustration etc. I'll come home after a terrible day like this, have a long hot shower, put on fleece pyjamas, brew up some tea, make cinnamon toast (with lots of butter and sugar), curl up in bed with my pets and read Beatrix Potter. Not exactly an event full of "shared laughs" and certainly not the way I spend time with my tween/teen relatives, but deeply comforting to me. 

 

*alternatives Wind in the Willows or Blue Castle (by LM Montgomery)

[sleepy_doggos]

I still read Beatrix Potter*, but I save it for no good, very bad days when it is all I can do to not curl up in a fetal position and just start screaming in anger/panic/frustration etc. I'll come home after a terrible day like this, have a long hot shower, put on fleece pyjamas, brew up some tea, make cinnamon toast (with lots of butter and sugar), curl up in bed with my pets and read Beatrix Potter. Not exactly an event full of "shared laughs" and certainly not the way I spend time with my tween/teen relatives, but deeply comforting to me. 
 
*alternatives Wind in the Willows or Blue Castle (by LM Montgomery)

Quoted just to say I adore Blue Castle. Have you ever read the Emily series? They are to me what Beatrix Potter is to you

[browngrl]

1 hour ago, sleepy_doggos said:

Quoted just to say I adore Blue Castle. Have you ever read the Emily series? They are to me what Beatrix Potter is to you

I have read every book LM Montgomery wrote but Blue Castle is my absolute favourite. When I am bored  I think about how I would write a screen play for this book and who I would cast in the various roles. This is in my top 100 books of all time. 

[sleepy_doggos]

I have read every book LM Montgomery wrote but Blue Castle is my absolute favourite. When I am bored  I think about how I would write a screen play for this book and who I would cast in the various roles. This is in my top 100 books of all time. 

Who would you cast?

[mango_fandango]

I read the second Emily book, it was a present. I assume my mother (think it was her) didn't realise it was the second in a series. I may well get myself the others, but I have a lot of unread books right now. There are a couple of others I'd like to buy too (not Emily ones). 

I haven't read much of Anne of Green Gables beyond the first one. I know what happens though (as in, who she marries and what their children are called). 

[sleepy_doggos]

I read the second Emily book, it was a present. I assume my mother (think it was her) didn't realise it was the second in a series. I may well get myself the others, but I have a lot of unread books right now. There are a couple of others I'd like to buy too (not Emily ones). 
I haven't read much of Anne of Green Gables beyond the first one. I know what happens though (as in, who she marries and what their children are called). 

I enjoyed all of LM's books except her poetry. What other books are on your list right now?

[mango_fandango]

My to-get list isn’t that long at the moment considering that the books-I-have-but-not-read-yet list is long. Mostly it’s the third and fourth Cormoran Strike books by Robert Galbraith/JK Rowling right now. I read The Silkworm a while ago now. 

[browngrl]

1 hour ago, sleepy_doggos said:

Who would you cast?

I go back and forth all the time. My current choice:

Barney: Joachiam Phoenix

cousin Olive: Blake Lively

Dr Redfern: John Goodman

Valancy:???Rachel Weisz (this is the casting I struggle most with)

I'm open to suggestions - I am secretly dreaming that some Holywood producer will read this thread and make it real)

[Jigsaw3]

Oooh, Blake Lively would be GREAT as cousin Olive.

I'd just worry that Hollywood would try to make Valancy's family nice, or give them some redeeming qualities, and they really weren't at ALL nice. (Picture Teri and Steve Maxwell? They'd give some of the buttoned up repressed fundies a run for their money.) Maybe Glenn Close for the mother?

Valancy: Carey Mulligan, or Jennifer Lawrence. I know, I know, but I think Jennifer Lawrence is a great actress and could do a good job with it. She's brash in real life, but I think she could pull off the challenge.