Josiah Duggar Part 6: Now Officially Engaged!

[FundaMental]

She sounds like a porn star. Just me?

 

Edit: Why am I being downvoted? I thought this forum was for snarking. She's 18, she's not off bounds. Genuinely confused here.

[lawlifelgbt]

...the rule is we can speculate once the fundie moves out, right?

[VelociRapture]

40 minutes ago, lawlifelgbt said:

...the rule is we can speculate once the fundie moves out, right?

I believe it’s once the person in question marries or takes another step that indicates they’re viewed as a full adult in their culture. I really hope no one does though. I honestly don’t think sexuality or gender identity is anyone else’s business and it’s ridiculously easy for people to fall back on tired stereotypes to prove a point. 

ETA: I just want to add that I do appreciate you asking for clarification about the topic instead of just starting to speculate. 

[Bad Wolf]

So, they're putting God first? I've never seen the Duggars put God first, as in feeding the hungry, helping the homeless, etc. They certainly don't follow Jesus's teaching, and he didn't say anything about abortion or side hugs.

[catlady]

4 minutes ago, VelociRapture said:

I believe it’s once the person in question marries or takes another step that indicates they’re viewed as a full adult in their culture. I really hope no one does though. I honestly don’t think sexuality or gender identity is anyone else’s business and it’s ridiculously easy for people to fall back on tired stereotypes to prove a point. 

and just because you can doesn't mean you should.  

[allthegoodnamesrgone]

1 hour ago, singsingsing said:

I feel you.  Lauren is all of 18. She was born in 1999!!!!

Christ! My kids were born in 97 & 2000, my oldest is 1 month younger than Joy, my youngest turned 18 two weeks ago. The 20 year old is living on his own thinking about going to Nursing school, the youngest is a Senior in High School and is going to University in August, she wants to be a Dentist. Neither of them are considering marriage, neither of them are really looking for more than a casual relationship right now, they both think they are way to young. THANK GOD!  I'm excited for what my kids are doing, I would be devastated if they were just wanting to get married and have babies, and not go out and be young and dumb and enjoy life.  Their is plenty of time for them to be married and parents later on enjoy having only yourself to be responsible for, for a while, it really is the best thing ever.

[SorenaJ]

Not speculating, but even if a Duggar was gay, they would still get married to an opposite-sex person, because that's what you are supposed to do. For them, the only marriage is hetero, so that's what they'll do. 

[MoonFace]

1 hour ago, SamiKatz said:

Can their official nickname be JoLene?  I know it doesn't really work, but I love that song!

I like that song too so can we not ruin it by calling them that?   Please?  With a cherry on top.  (Or a pickle, if you prefer)

 

[Meggo]

I can't decide if I'm getting older or they're getting younger? Or both? 

She could be my daughter. And not in the "I started my family ridiculously early" way - but the "I was out of college, working and met my husband in 98.... she could be my daughter" way. That's terrifying.

 

[twoanddone]

My kid was born in 2003. This is making me crazy. 

[Nashville92]

I think theyll get married May 25th or June 1st/2nd.  The Fundies Wiki has her birthday as May 18th.  Didn't I read somewhere her family moved to Arkansas recently? 

[twoanddone]

I would be very shocked if they had a long engagement.  How old are her parents?

[MoonFace]

49 minutes ago, SPHASH said:

Cuz she is still at home raising children that aren't hers.  Fuck you Mullet and Boob.

It may suck but at least she hasn't been forced to push them out of her own uterus and have to be 'available' if the man of the house is interested in something more than a sandwich. 

[melon]

7 minutes ago, Nashville92 said:

I think theyll get married May 25th or June 1st/2nd.  The Fundies Wiki has her birthday as May 18th.  Didn't I read somewhere her family moved to Arkansas recently? 

I think they will get married in June,not long after her 19th birthday.Then if they did,a  baby in March/April or 2019.

[FundaMental]

5 minutes ago, melon said:

I think they will get married in June,not long after her 19th birthday.Then if they did,a  baby in March/April or 2019.

I'm actually going to change my baby date to April. My guess is April 29th. Baby <Insert Biblical name here> Duggar. Perhaps it's too soon to be speculating about baby names, but when you're a Duggar you don't wait for these things, so I won't either. 

 

Seriously though - imagine being in a 'relationship' (not much different from friendship with the level of physical contact they bring in) for not even two months and then getting engaged. How any of these fundie girls manage it is beyond me.

[Carm_88]

https://instagram.com/p/Bf86fJOh5_A/
Josiah talks of gods timing [emoji849]

[kachuu]

I don't know why but this one hit me worse then Joy or Kendra. THEY ARE SO YOUNG.

[Oudler]

I hope their wedding is not in June! I want to marry on June 2nd (my 25. birthday is June 1st)

My boyfriend is planning something... he is restoring an oldtimer which I’m not allowed to see and he asked me to stay at home at my birthday instead of going to a festival, so there must be something going on... [emoji848] I don’t want to share my special day with them!

 

 

[allthegoodnamesrgone]

1 minute ago, kachuu said:

I don't know why but this one hit me worse then Joy or Kendra. THEY ARE SO YOUNG.

Probably because Si is only 21(?) Joe and Austin are a little older so at least one of them had a little more life behind them. Si and Lauren are both super young. 

[Georgiana]

I think we need to be very careful about speculation here.  It's really a harmful and ABSOLUTELY hetero-patriarchal assumption that a man who does not conform to hyper-masculine ideals must be gay.  A man who is in touch with his emotions is not necessarily gay.  A man who likes fashion is not necessarily gay.  A man who is more gentle and kind is not necessarily gay.  In fact, none of those things have ANY connection to sexuality in the slightest.

This is a stereotype perpetuated by those who want to reinforce ideals of toxic masculinity in order to SHAME men into being manly men.  And what is implied in that stereotype is that traits that are traditionally seen as "feminine" are lesser.  The underlying assumption is that if you are not "strong" enough to be manly, you MUST not be "strong" enough to be the penetrative partner.  You must be "weak" and therefore like to receive...like a woman.

And by using these traits in fundie men to speculate about their sexuality, WE take things a step back.  WE reinforce to them that all men MUST be super manly OR they must be gay.  

In this culture, a man who CHOOSES not to be hypermasculine is in rebellion.  As much if not more than a woman wearing pants and cutting her hair.  It's choosing to go against the norms of the rigid gender binary that this movement insists upon.  And it's an important rebellion because it reinforces that "feminine" traits are NOT lesser.  That they are NOT weaker.  And that men can (and maybe should be encouraged to) adopt them.  

Speculation is fair when there are clues that someone MAY NOT BE ATTRACTED TO A PARTICULAR GENDER OR SEX AT ALL.  I would posit David Waller as an example here because by his own admission he never was super interested in women*, did not want to get married, wasn't even that into his (now) wife, and had to be shamed into engagement.  That along with his incredibly close male friendships does warrant discussion, IMO.  I'm glad the marriage seems to be working, but their "love" story was nothing short of bizarre and did very much invite speculation.   

So while everyone is free to do what they want, if you're speculating on someone's sexuality simply because they don't conform to a hypermasculine gender binary, I think you need to have a word with yourself and consider what you are really doing.  Would you speculate on a woman's sexuality when she wears pants or cuts her hair?  If not, why is it OK to do so for a man just because he has chosen to break somewhat with the binary as well?  

Feminism is for everyone.  When the "feminine" is not considered lesser, that makes it OK for MEN TOO to express more "feminine" traits.  We should support men in this culture who chose to challenge the rigid gender roles, because ALL challenges to rigid gender roles help to erode their power and entrenchment.  

*Most fundie men do admit they struggle with lust and noticing women.  It's often PART of their testimony.  "I was struggling with lust and sin with all these temptresses, but then I found my pure angel-virgin".  Waller's testimony is a bit unique in that he pointedly had NO INTEREST. This is not something that is bragged about because it makes him seem less "manly".  

[Satan'sFortress]

Gosh, I don't know what is wrong with all of you.  I am just super excited about this engagement!  Lauren is such a sweet girl and has a servant's heart.  I know that Josiah will lead her in Christ and this is such an exciting step for him.  They will make such a sweet couple.  I am also super excited to see what the Lord has in store for them!!  Basically, to summarize:  super excited, sweet, The Lord.  Also, super excited!!!!

[KelseyAnn]

2 minutes ago, Satan'sFortress said:

Gosh, I don't know what is wrong with all of you.  I am just super excited about this engagement!  Lauren is such a sweet girl and has a servant's heart.  I know that Josiah will lead her in Christ and this is such an exciting step for him.  They will make such a sweet couple.  I am also super excited to see what the Lord has in store for them!!  Basically, to summarize:  super excited, sweet, The Lord.  Also, super excited!!!!

Does Jimbob know you're on the computer, Michelle? (sarcasm)

[Kelsey]

1 minute ago, KelseyAnn said:

Does Jimbob know you're on the computer, Michelle? (sarcasm)

Jana is the keeper of the internet. 

[Crazy Enough to Join]

I wonder what is going through the single Duggar kids' minds. All the explanations make no sense. They're too steeped in the Kool-Aid to think their parents are incompetent and be staying around to raise the younger ones. At this point, JB has basically acknowledged on TV that he's currently all aboard the twins getting married train. Both have to be seen as desirable matches in fundie circles and have a lot of different marriage options. You can't convince me they've never met an at least reasonably compatible person. To me, the only explanation is that not marrying really is an act of rebellion, a desire for a non-fundie life. Perhaps that's why the fundies are marrying them off younger, before critical thinking skills kick in.

[VelociRapture]

1 hour ago, FundaMental said:

She sounds like a porn star. Just me?

 

Edit: Why am I being downvoted? I thought this forum was for snarking. She's 18, she's not off bounds. Genuinely confused here.

You seem a bit new around here, so (first of all) welcome to FJ!

Just so you know for future reference, no one has to explain why they down-voted you on here - but because you seem genuinely confused, I’ll explain why I personally down-voted your comment. I did find it to be a bit distasteful. Not the worst thing I’ve read on here by far, but enough for me to down-vote it. How someone speaks is something they can’t always control and I just found it a bit off putting that you compared the voice of a teenager raised in a purity-centric culture to a porn star.

We are a snark site, but that doesn’t mean we all agree on everything or that we don’t call each other out for comments that may be/are out of line. The site relies heavily on self-policing in the threads and the down-voting you received is an example of that happening. You can say what you want if it’s not against the site rules, but that doesn’t mean we have to agree with you, like it, or allow it to be said without objection.

Others may have down-voted for other reasons, so I’m only speaking for myself here. It happens to everyone at some point though. I hope you stick around and learn more about the site. It can be a wonderful educational resource about the dangers of various forms of fundamentalism.