Joy and Austin 19: 273 Days After the Wedding Gideon Arrived

[luv2laugh]

Not up to date but did she give birth yet? This thread says it’s hot.

[bucherwurm]

I am currently on my Canadian maternity leave, and have been off since the middle of October when I was 38 weeks. Feeling very thankful right now.

[neurogirl]

I was born at 32 weeks (spontaneous placental abruption yay) and my parents were clearly not expecting me yet. I remember my mom telling me that by the time I went home from the hospital her maternity leave had ended and she had to go back to work. I just can't imagine that. I'm going to ask her about it tonight. 

(After learning more about human development and birth/delivery from you fine folks I did ask my mom if she had a steroid shot to help my lungs, but she said because she had been at the mall when her membranes broke they didn't want to stop delivery on risk of infection. And I was born within 12 hours of her arriving at the hospital. We joke now that I was so early because I was just so impatient and advanced, and that I was perfect so they didn't need anymore kids, but I know it's just a joke because my mom wanted 2 or 3 kids and she couldn't have any after me, an only child. Sorry mom :/ ) 

@luv2laugh Nope no announced JoStin baby yet! Just the usual Duggar upcoming/post birth thread drift

[Crazy Enough to Join]

For those talking about duggar homebirth risks (I agree!) but I don't know that it's ignorance driving the risks. They probably can't afford a hospital birth a year with their insurance. That could easily run 5k a year.

[onekidanddone]

2 minutes ago, Georgiana said:

With a daughter, you may never have to worry about penises at all.  

At One Kid's camp last summer we go up to see her on visitor's day. A fellow bunk mate, is hanging around my girl. I'm watching the dynamics and it is rather clear to me that  girl  has a crush on my child and my child appears clueless My thoughts were.. yea, they were 13 at the time and perfect age for fist crush/love. Then I think.. oh no, first love is all well and good,but that means first breakup and I hate the idea of my kid having her heart broken...Aaaaand then my mind jumps to think it could be my kid who does the heart breaking. 

Where it be a penis or vagina, one day my kid is going to make that leap, and I don't know if I'll ever be ready.

[fraurosena]

33 minutes ago, onekidanddone said:

I worry because Jill had two traumatic devilries

Gee, that devil really has been busy down in Duggarland! First we had Josh with the devil building a fortress in his heart, and now you're telling me Jill had two devilries? 

What else has the devil been up to while I was stuck in the politics threads? 

[tabitha2]

The Devil went down to Duggar Land...

 

[SapphireSlytherin]

He was looking for courtship deal

[tabitha2]

He was in a bind
'Cause he was way behind
And he was willin' to make a meal...

[Satan'sFortress]

Tater tot casserole?

[tabitha2]

Old Nick would cook from scratch a casserole with herbs, spices , fresh ingredients and add cooking wine to his recipe

[onekidanddone]

1 hour ago, fraurosena said:

Gee, that devil really has been busy down in Duggarland! First we had Josh with the devil building a fortress in his heart, and now you're telling me Jill had two devilries? 

What else has the devil been up to while I was stuck in the politics threads? 

Stain. Satin. Seitan Satan made me bad spieller 

[rainbowbabycakes]

3 hours ago, VineHeart137 said:

.

We once had 6 week old twins enroll in our daycare. On their first day their mom literally sobbed her way out the door. I felt awful for her.

I work in daycare, and we regularly have 6 weekers... It's tough.

My ex is in the army, and when my guy was born, I was lucky to be able to stay home... After working in a daycare, I didn't want my newborn in one! i babysat and picked up a few short term nanny gigs through craigslist and sitter city (completely insane, btw, how many people will see an ad on craigslist and call and be lie "hi perfect stranger, who I have no idea is not insane, will you come into my home, have access to everything, and watch my kids tonight, without me having ever even met you?) while he was little. We divorced when he was 2, and I went back to work in daycare.... 

My current company's benefits suck, which is terrible, since they're a huge national corporation. No paid anything outside of whatever PTO you have saved up (but it doesn't roll over, so you can't even save, planning for when you want to have kids), you can take FMLA, but it's up to each individual director (and I assume DM as well) how to handle more than that. My director is awesome, but not all are. She's also willing you let you work in the infant room, and nurse there too, if you want to after baby is born. But the company doesn't offer employee discount on care (or any discounts, even the companies we work with to offer 10%) before age 2, so unless you receive childcare assistance, you can't afford to send your baby there anyway, lol

[NotQuiteMotY]

Yeah, parental leave here sucks. My last job I was guaranteed up to 12 weeks' unpaid leave and I had to use any saved paid time off concurrent with it: no using a week of paid time plus the leave. I ended up leaving beforehand, but my current part-time job is even worse; since we have fewer than 50 employees, FMLA doesn't apply at all. If we have a second child and I'm still there, I'll probably get about six weeks off unpaid and that's it.

[SorenaJ]

US maternity leave sounds absolutely shite. Here you get 52 paid weeks at 100 % salary. 

[VineHeart137]

1 hour ago, rainbowbabycakes said:

I work in daycare, and we regularly have 6 weekers... It's tough.

My ex is in the army, and when my guy was born, I was lucky to be able to stay home... After working in a daycare, I didn't want my newborn in one! i babysat and picked up a few short term nanny gigs through craigslist and sitter city (completely insane, btw, how many people will see an ad on craigslist and call and be lie "hi perfect stranger, who I have no idea is not insane, will you come into my home, have access to everything, and watch my kids tonight, without me having ever even met you?) while he was little. We divorced when he was 2, and I went back to work in daycare.... 

My current company's benefits suck, which is terrible, since they're a huge national corporation. No paid anything outside of whatever PTO you have saved up (but it doesn't roll over, so you can't even save, planning for when you want to have kids), you can take FMLA, but it's up to each individual director (and I assume DM as well) how to handle more than that. My director is awesome, but not all are. She's also willing you let you work in the infant room, and nurse there too, if you want to after baby is born. But the company doesn't offer employee discount on care (or any discounts, even the companies we work with to offer 10%) before age 2, so unless you receive childcare assistance, you can't afford to send your baby there anyway, lol

You may be working for the same company that I used to, mine was also a national corporation and had the ridiculous "no discounts before age 2" rule. Knowing that that's the most expensive age, smh. Part of the reason I quit 8 weeks after I came back. But I totally get that not everyone has that luxury.

[scribble]

4 hours ago, Bushes of Love said:

Wow. US maternity leave sucks.

Yup. My company gives 12 weeks of "paid leave" if you give birth by taking it from your accrued sick time (if you have enough to stretch over 12 weeks, which is only possible for long time employees.) Since I adopted, instead of giving birth, they would not let me use sick time for my maternity leave. The whole thing irritated me to no end since I had enough sick days available to give me a good amount of  maternity leave. I couldn't afford to take more than a week off unpaid each time.

[nst]

Lets take bets Joy is the smart one and goes to a hospital from the beginning....

Bueller anyone 

no - didn't think so... she has to let Dr. Jill deliver her in Joy's kitchen with the nice floor 

[Someone Out There]

5 hours ago, onekidanddone said:

A friend of mine had some simple parenting advice for me. I'ld like to pass on to Joy and Austin.

I shall paraphrase:

Raising Daughters is horrible. With sons you have to worry about one penis. With daughters you have to worry about many penises.

Not thing I want to think about when my kid is going into high school in the fall.

I would point out that one penis can impregnate many females over the course of 9 months, whereas a female will only have one full term pregnancy over the course of 9 months.

Unfortunately then there is the responsibility issues...

[candygirl200413]

Ditto @Someone Out There, my mom always said that with me my twin brother that she'd be more pissed at him for impregnating than me getting pregnant.

 

[GoddessOfVictory]

When I took a Payroll class in college I remember the textbook mentioning that companies who give paid time off for maternity leave can require that the mother notify the company every time she leaves the house while on leave. I am, of course, paraphrasing as my textbooks are currently packed away but I remembered thinking that was an insane rule when I read it. However, it could have changed in the years since I took that class.

If I find my textbooks while this thread drift is still going, I'll come back and post a more exact version of that particular rule.

[Firebird]

Free Jinger definitely makes me think through political issues. I want to believe I am American therefore I am free, but everything is so expensive and you have to work so hard to get by.  Big bills for even the basics of life like heat and food and healthcare make me question that If I have to slave away and sacrifice my dreams to make ends meet how free am I really? 

But I also think life in general is hard work and always has been. 

[Kangaroo]

I'm going to guess an announcement will be made tomorrow. Jessa and Jill just had a two day Instagram absence of activity (No posting, liking or commenting). Jessa liked a bunch of photos at once late in the evening of the 23rd, nothing from Grandma Jill as yet.

[Ozlsn]

7 hours ago, neurogirl said:

I was born at 32 weeks (spontaneous placental abruption yay) and my parents were clearly not expecting me yet. I remember my mom telling me that by the time I went home from the hospital her maternity leave had ended and she had to go back to work. I just can't imagine that. I'm going to ask her about it tonight. 

(After learning more about human development and birth/delivery from you fine folks I did ask my mom if she had a steroid shot to help my lungs, but she said because she had been at the mall when her membranes broke they didn't want to stop delivery on risk of infection. And I was born within 12 hours of her arriving at the hospital. We joke now that I was so early because I was just so impatient and advanced, and that I was perfect so they didn't need anymore kids, but I know it's just a joke because my mom wanted 2 or 3 kids and she couldn't have any after me, an only child. Sorry mom :/ ) 

@luv2laugh

My heart breaks for your mom, on both counts.  I would have had a breakdown if I'd had to return to work just as my child came home from NICU. Actually if my leave had ended at 6 weeks I would have had to leave work, he was still critically ill at that point and I was pretty much living at the hospital. As it was I was on sick leave from when I was hospitalised unexpectedly to when he was born (2 weeks), then rolled into firstly paid maternity leave (3 months full time, I took it as 6 months half pay), then paid parental leave (?3 months - because of a weird quirk I had no idea about it came as a lump sum), then unpaid maternity leave (initially the rest of one year, extended another year when my son still hadn't left hospital.) I ended up having to leave work after that as there was no way I could juggle it with the ongoing hospital appointments - and then I was paid out my annual leave that I had owing (and had forgotten about.) So that was helpful! 

 

5 hours ago, NotQuiteMotY said:

Yeah, parental leave here sucks. My last job I was guaranteed up to 12 weeks' unpaid leave and I had to use any saved paid time off concurrent with it: no using a week of paid time plus the leave. I ended up leaving beforehand, but my current part-time job is even worse; since we have fewer than 50 employees, FMLA doesn't apply at all. If we have a second child and I'm still there, I'll probably get about six weeks off unpaid and that's it.

I really don't get this dog in the manger attitude to leave, seriously. What skin is it off their nose if you choose to use leave in conjunction with maternity leave? Nothing says "oh we value you as an employee" like being an arsehole about petty crap like that.

 

2 hours ago, GoddessOfVictory said:

When I took a Payroll class in college I remember the textbook mentioning that companies who give paid time off for maternity leave can require that the mother notify the company every time she leaves the house while on leave. I am, of course, paraphrasing as my textbooks are currently packed away but I remembered thinking that was an insane rule when I read it. However, it could have changed in the years since I took that class.

If I find my textbooks while this thread drift is still going, I'll come back and post a more exact version of that particular rule.

Seriously?! I hope the same applied to managers on their annual golfing trip. 

[neurogirl]

@Ozlsn thanks for the love for my mama! I confirmed with her tonight- she had the standard 12 weeks unpaid leave available, tried to go back to work for a bit while I was in NICU so she could take off when I came out, but it was against policy to let her do that. She actually only took 8 weeks off because my dad was in grad school and they needed the income. Yet another voice saying US health care and family leave royally suck.