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Jinjer 37: The Joys of Pregnancy


Coconut Flan

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4 minutes ago, December said:

But I've definitely known people who had parents, siblings, close friends and/or in-laws present in the delivery room! 

Me, me, me, me, me, me!!!! :my_biggrin: I'm not an exhibitionist, but I had my husband, sister, mom, dad, and mother-in-law in the labor and delivery room for my first birth. The same plus my sister-in-law and a niece for my second. I only got to witness one of my sister's five births, but I guess it touched me, and I wanted to share that with loved ones. 

I don't regret it, but I do sometimes look back and wonder at my choice. I'm generally an introvert. 

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9 minutes ago, WhatWouldJohnCrichtonDo? said:

Me, me, me, me, me, me!!!! :my_biggrin: I'm not an exhibitionist, but I had my husband, sister, mom, dad, and mother-in-law in the labor and delivery room for my first birth. The same plus my sister-in-law and a niece for my second. I only got to witness one of my sister's five births, but I guess it touched me, and I wanted to share that with loved ones. 

I don't regret it, but I do sometimes look back and wonder at my choice. I'm generally an introvert. 

Bless your heart that you can be that open-- i just couldn't. Thinking about more people in there when i'd already be stressed, exhausted, emotional and in pain. Hell no. You're a better person then me.

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4 minutes ago, kachuu said:

Bless your heart that you can be that open-- i just couldn't. Thinking about more people in there when i'd already be stressed, exhausted, emotional and in pain. Hell no. You're a better person then me.

I don't think it made me a better person than anyone. I could ignore them all except my husband and sister (who was my coach/doula) as long as they stayed quiet.

The second time, my brother-in-law was in the room for a minute, dropping off his wife and daughter. He.just.kept.talking! If it could have spared a smidgen of my focus to yell at him to shut up or leave the room, I would have. But I was focusing on relaxing through my contraction, and fortunately, he left before the next contraction. After that, everyone stayed quiet except my sister, the nurses, and the doctor. As long as they stayed quiet, I really didn't remember that they were there. Or at least I didn't care.

I don't know about other moms who've given birth vaginally, but my usual modesty flew out the window during labor and delivery, and it took me a few days afterwards to get back to normal. I don't know how common that is?

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43 minutes ago, WhatWouldJohnCrichtonDo? said:

Me, me, me, me, me, me!!!! :my_biggrin: I'm not an exhibitionist, but I had my husband, sister, mom, dad, and mother-in-law in the labor and delivery room for my first birth. The same plus my sister-in-law and a niece for my second. I only got to witness one of my sister's five births, but I guess it touched me, and I wanted to share that with loved ones. 

I don't regret it, but I do sometimes look back and wonder at my choice. I'm generally an introvert. 

Yea, but would you do so with a camera crew yelling "CUT! Let's do that again please".

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4 minutes ago, onekidanddone said:

Yea, but would you do so with a camera crew yelling "CUT! Let's do that again please".

That reminds me of the Kourtney Kardashian had her births filmed & she literally grabbed the child herself as he/she was coming out.

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I truly believe that if I had asked my parents to be in the delivery room, they would have had previously arranged plans.  They visited the next day with the first (she was born at midnight) and in the evening (he was born at 2PM) for the second. 

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@SassyPants, my mom later told me that my dad spent most of the time quietly reading a book he brought. She nudged him to look up to see his grandchild born, then he went back to reading. :my_biggrin: I wonder if he might have preffered to wait in the waiting room or at home.

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1 minute ago, SassyPants said:

I truly believe that if I had asked my parents to be in the delivery room, they would have had previously arranged plans.  They visited the next day with the first (she was born at midnight) and in the evening (he was born at 2PM) for the second. 

My inlaws plan to be waiting right out the door as soon as he pops out of me. I'm stressing the fuck out. Like, why cant we have 5 minutes of transition before you HAVE to shove yourselves into every damn moment. Is that selfish?

Do the nurses allow visitors back there as soon as you are in recovery or do they wait till you give the say-so? My MIL is overwhelming and pushy and so help me god if she just waltz through the door while i'm pushing. I'm super hormonal about the woman today, so you know, our future is really bright.

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Just now, kachuu said:

My inlaws plan to be waiting right out the door as soon as he pops out of me. I'm stressing the fuck out. Like, why cant we have 5 minutes of transition before you HAVE to shove yourselves into every damn moment. Is that selfish?

Do the nurses allow visitors back there as soon as you are in recovery or do they wait till you give the say-so? My MIL is overwhelming and pushy and so help me god if she just waltz through the door while i'm pushing. I'm super hormonal about the woman today, so you know, our future is really bright.

Our nurses would let in exactly who you said exactly when you said (except while you are getting an epidural, no one comes in or leaves in that exact moment).  Security would have removed anyone pushing through a door from the building, and called the police.  

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3 minutes ago, justoneoftwo said:

Our nurses would let in exactly who you said exactly when you said (except while you are getting an epidural, no one comes in or leaves in that exact moment).  Security would have removed anyone pushing through a door from the building, and called the police.  

Maybe i can start day dreaming that the cops will just take them away. This is all hormones, i think. :pb_lol:

Thanks! This made me feel a bit better. I'm sure this is over-reacting & I'll be begging them to bring me food or something after the fact.

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1 minute ago, kachuu said:

My inlaws plan to be waiting right out the door as soon as he pops out of me. I'm stressing the fuck out. Like, why cant we have 5 minutes of transition before you HAVE to shove yourselves into every damn moment. Is that selfish?

Do the nurses allow visitors back there as soon as you are in recovery or do they wait till you give the say-so? My MIL is overwhelming and pushy and so help me god if she just waltz through the door while i'm pushing. I'm super hormonal about the woman today, so you know, our future is really bright.

My kids were born via c-section, so no one was popping in as soon as the baby was born. My inlaws were great- old, lots of kids, our daughter ( our first kid) was their 3 grandchild born in 2 months time and another followed a few weeks later. These were grandkids 5, 6, 7, and 8...and GK #1 was 4 at the time. 

My daughter was GK #1 for my parents and I am an only daughter, and still I don't think my parents wanted any part of all that-

My daughter had her daughter in So America- her ILs are very involved and were at the hospital when C. was born- I waited a month before I flew down- I wanted to give them time to settle in, daddy to enjoy his family leave time, and then showed up with my mom in tow...with my daughter getting so sick after birth, I did end up staying nearly 3 months.

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Those who have witnessed a birth are so lucky. I would love to see my niece be born next month, but my sister doesn't want anyone but her husband. I respect her decision, but I'm still disappointed, especially since for her first baby, my other sister got to be in the room. I understand it's because my other sister is a labor and delivery nurse, so that's pretty much her wheel house and she was a huge help to my sister, but it still sucks for me who wants to be there but doesn't have the skills to justify being in the room. 

(It doesn't help that my sister and I have had trouble our whole lives, and I've always felt slighted for my other sister, so this doesn't help. But I'm trying to be supportive and positive because I understand her pregnancy isn't about me in the least.)

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2 hours ago, WhatWouldJohnCrichtonDo? said:

I don't regret it, but I do sometimes look back and wonder at my choice. I'm generally an introvert. 

As a fellow introvert, that sounds like my absolute worst nightmare! I'm glad you were able to do what was right for you at the time. :)

1 hour ago, kachuu said:

Do the nurses allow visitors back there as soon as you are in recovery or do they wait till you give the say-so?

Your mileage may vary but from my family's (non-childbirth) hospital experiences... you should be able to specify who can/can't visit you when you're admitted. If someone who's not allowed in tries to access your room, they'll be removed by security.

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8 hours ago, Icea said:

I don't know about that. Alyssa (Bates) Webster's births were never shown on Bringing Up Bates, we only saw the last check-ups before birth and Gil and Kelly visiting them after the baby was born 8in the case of their oldest daughter). Feels like Jinger and Jeremy could get the same "deal" with their child.

When Lexi was born they filmed in the clinic, but not in the delivery room. I could see J&J going for that with Jeremy showing off his scrubs. He does love to dress up.

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1 hour ago, kachuu said:

My inlaws plan to be waiting right out the door as soon as he pops out of me. I'm stressing the fuck out. Like, why cant we have 5 minutes of transition before you HAVE to shove yourselves into every damn moment. Is that selfish?

Do the nurses allow visitors back there as soon as you are in recovery or do they wait till you give the say-so? My MIL is overwhelming and pushy and so help me god if she just waltz through the door while i'm pushing. I'm super hormonal about the woman today, so you know, our future is really bright.

My hospital took what we wanted  (and the nurses made sure they talked to the Mr, but also talked to ME).  So when I went into 'real' labor, they shoo-ed everyone out for me.  They continued to keep folks out, let the Mr. go down and tell the waiting room all was well, but kept people out for as long as I wanted--verified I was OK w/ guests before they let them in.  And they let nobody wake me up for the entire time I was there--except the baby :)

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2 hours ago, WhatWouldJohnCrichtonDo? said:

I don't know about other moms who've given birth vaginally, but my usual modesty flew out the window during labor and delivery, and it took me a few days afterwards to get back to normal. I don't know how common that is?

I was out of my MIND with pain (remember:  unmedicated birth, and not by my choice). I asked everyone to check me (legs WIDE apart) to see how far I was dilated every time they walked in the door.

Including the janitor.

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4 minutes ago, SapphireSlytherin said:

I was out of my MIND with pain (remember:  unmedicated birth, and not by my choice). I asked everyone to check me (legs WIDE apart) to see how far I was dilated every time they walked in the door.

Including the janitor.

The best description of labor that I ever heard was from a friend who told me that (and I quote), "by the end, you won't care if they roll you right out on California Street, legs wide open, to deliver that kid at the busy bus stop."

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21 hours ago, HarleyQuinn said:

I bet Jinger will be a hospital birth with pain meds and an epidural. I'll be surprised if it isn't that.

I hope it will be a hospital birth with pain meds and an epidural. :pray:

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My youngest was born by repeat section at a different hospital than my others. And by a very attractive male doctor man. Which is completely irrelevant.  Because I had had one premature birth, resulting in an emergency c-section, this gorgeous doctor man wanted to make sure the baby’s lungs were developed, as it was several weeks before my due date. So an amniocentesis was in order. These are not usually performed at such a late stage and it is more difficult because the baby obviously takes up a lot of room.  As it was a teaching hospital, he asked if I would allow some medical students and residents to join the party. ‘Of course’, I said, smiling sweetly. In they came. A whole bunch of them. He did the procedure, and, what the hell, let’s just check everything out, as they all watched closely. You really just don’t care anymore.

I want to add something very important here.  Having a hot doctor does nothing whatsoever to help your self-confidence, with regards to your appearance.   He was my favourite OB, not because he was quite dashing, but because he cared.  He tried to figure out why I had gone into spontaneous early labour with my second baby.  He failed, but he really tried.  

 

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11 hours ago, tabitha2 said:

I don’t guess she’ll not want at least Jessa or her mother. She doesn’t hate her family or want to separate herself from them after all. 

I depends on the person. My sister is my best friend (and you are a lurker too so HI!) and my mom and I are SUPER close and I didn't want them in the room when my son was born. It depends on the stress it puts on her. If Jessa is going to be overbearing and push Jeremy out of the way or steamroll what she wants over Jinger's needs, Jinger might opt to have family wait in the waiting area. I'm also an incredibly modest person so I only wanted my husband in the room. It was husband, one nurse and the doctor walked in with like 5 minutes to spare and it was everything I wanted. 

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1 hour ago, SassyPants said:

The best description of labor that I ever heard was from a friend who told me that (and I quote), "by the end, you won't care if they roll you right out on California Street, legs wide open, to deliver that kid at the busy bus stop."

My mom's line is that by the end you don't care what hole they pull the kid out of just as long as they get it out.

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My modesty did not go out the window while in labor. 1 nurse, 1 doctor, and me. That's it. When the Epidural began to fail my doctor suggested to call the anesthesiologist back in. I declined and suffered for the next hour. I wish I wasn't so uptight but it's just me, oh well.

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3 hours ago, Sky with diamonds said:

I hope it will be a hospital birth with pain meds and an epidural. :pray:

I hope it'll be whatever she genuinely wants it to be.  I think a lot of the DugGirls "want" at home because they're told to, but if Jing has more options and genuinely wants home, I hoe she has that, and, if she wants a hospital and epidural, I hope she has that without getting shit from her family.

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12 minutes ago, Jug Band Baby said:

I hope it'll be whatever she genuinely wants it to be.  I think a lot of the DugGirls "want" at home because they're told to, but if Jing has more options and genuinely wants home, I hoe she has that, and, if she wants a hospital and epidural, I hope she has that without getting shit from her family.

I’m not sure how much they’re actually told to give birth at home. Jessa at least was pretty enthusiastically encouraging Jinger to have a hospital birth, epidural, etc. if that’s what she wanted. And Jana at the same time said that she would prefer to give birth at a birthing centre or hospital.

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