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Bro Gary Hawkins 4: HAY-MAYUN!


DaisyD

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From here:

Do NOT microwave Cheez Whiz in the jar. My sister and I learned that one the hard way. :pb_eek:

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Ok Folks, it's obvious to me that Sis Becky done wrote this.Screenshot_2018-02-01-09-47-45.thumb.png.1f7bfe8402bd1e8e58a11a60a35dc441.png

Because of Decent Writing Skillz,

Sis Heifer

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20 minutes ago, Texas Heifer said:

Ok Folks, it's obvious to me that Sis Becky done wrote this.Screenshot_2018-02-01-09-47-45.thumb.png.1f7bfe8402bd1e8e58a11a60a35dc441.png

Because of Decent Writing Skillz,

Sis Heifer

This isn't a "newsletter",  it's a Facebook status update. These people strike me as lazy.

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19 minutes ago, LimeKitty said:

This isn't a "newsletter",  it's a Facebook status update. These people strike me as lazy.

You don’t say??

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Definitely sis Becky who wrote that.  I wonder what was going on with bro Gary’s son.  Poor boy has no way out that we know of and maybe just gave in and accepted his fate.  Gary’s kids had to watch Becky’s kids run away all the while knowing they just couldn’t.  

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You used my title! YAAAS. 

That letter is definitely a Sis Becky production. It sounds a bit like what Gary says, but it’s better written. 

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Back to cheese-food products, Cheesewhiz is really good on soft pretzels, and nothing beats Velveeta for getting my dog to take her pills. That’s all I got. 

Oh, wait, no it isn’t. HAAAYYY-MAYYUN!!

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Y'all, I think Sis Becky has left us. I can't find her anywhere. Deactivated?

Nothing after "Married"

Screenshot_2018-02-01-23-35-53.thumb.png.a585522f162c5b0b3f4c9dce5e421cdd.png

She's not in our Best Bro's friends:

Spoiler

Screenshot_2018-02-01-23-05-02.thumb.png.fc83199125c91e23dd646e0aa90c9fc4.png

And this comes up when I search for her. No pic:

Spoiler

Screenshot_2018-02-01-23-34-37.thumb.png.98093bea58596d8a93f3db7b1cab4e21.png

How is she going to Dosh and hawk Plexus with no Facebook?

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I wonder if she's been put in FB jail. Technically you're not supposed to use your personal account for promotional purposes.

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That might explain it.

So (speaking of Plexus), last thread, I mentioned my ex-fiancé's wife and her Plexusing. She has gotten much worse in recent weeks. The emojis fly fast and furious, whereas before, there were only a sprinkling here and there.

And this. This was over a picture of her office door, which had a plastic-covered printout of the word "COACH" and a couple of football stickers.

The woman works at a hotel. I am the daughter of a (retired) football coach. My eyes could not have rolled any harder, y'all.

photostudio_1517534415561.png

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12 minutes ago, Texas Heifer said:

That might explain it.

So (speaking of Plexus), last thread, I mentioned my ex-fiancé's wife and her Plexusing. She has gotten much worse in recent weeks. The emojis fly fast and furious, whereas before, there were only a sprinkling here and there.

And this. This was over a picture of her office door, which had a plastic-covered printout of the word "COACH" and a couple of football stickers.

The woman works at a hotel. I am the daughter of a (retired) football coach. My eyes could not have rolled any harder, y'all.

photostudio_1517534415561.png

I'm so confused.  Is she some kind of athletic coach off-hours from the hotel, or just inexplicably called coach at the hotel?  

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2 hours ago, acheronbeach said:

I'm so confused.  Is she some kind of athletic coach off-hours from the hotel, or just inexplicably called coach at the hotel?  

The inexplicable one. I cannot imagine her coaching an actual sport any more than I could Sis Becky.

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Okay y'all. There is literally no one else I can share this with besides you guys and Bro Heifer, so please excuse me if I am being a jerk. This is...a totally believable conversation between my ex and his Plexus-shilling wife. You know, the "coach." :pb_rollseyes:

I reiterate: this is between a husband and wife. Who live together in the same house, have no children to distract them, and work in the same building in sister departments.

photostudio_1517706040828.thumb.png.4cf3eb0189ca865ebaca5c1d9bd0d908.png

HilarityRTPlexus2.png.062a684b96c03eb7ce8e2473c1ad098c.png

 

I. Cannot. Even. I have been quoting to Bro Heifer, "Babe, why did you not tell me about this. I am going to order" in a robto voice, to which he deadpans (also robto-like): "you should buy some." All day long. :pb_lol:

(Yellow is one of her fellow Plexusers, naturally.)

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Ok Folks, here he goes. It's the return of the Supper Bowel! 

:wham:

 

photostudio_1517713051673.png

Complete with an AMEN comment ending in an actual eleventy!

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Supper Bowel? I. . .I. . .I just can't. . .I'm all out of evens, or whatever it is the kids call it these days.

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I am howling with laughter! :pb_lol:

What’cha wanna bet weens will be served at the supper bowel?  

 

Not to brag, butt I’ve been known to win a couple of supper bowels, myself. It was a big blow out.  It left me pooped in the end.  

 

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FIRST of all, having any kind of bowel is most comfortable at home, so I think most people would PREFER to have their supper bowel at home. It's kind of embarrassing in Church, you know?

SECOND does Bro Gary know when the Super Bowl starts? It's not during church time for me, and I'm 3 hours behind Gary. How late is Gary going to stay at church?

THIRD I must confess that Cheez Whiz is a guilty pleasure of mine, and one of the things I make with it does include weens.  Going forward, I will say 100 HAY-MAYUNs as penance for partaking in the Cheez. 

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2 minutes ago, Gimme a Free RV said:

I am howling with laughter! :pb_lol:

What’cha wanna bet weens will be served at the supper bowel?  

 

Not to brag, butt I’ve been known to win a couple of supper bowels, myself. It was a big blow out.  It left me pooped in the end.  

 

Bro Heifer thinks you're awesome! 

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13 minutes ago, Georgiana said:

FIRST of all, having any kind of bowel is most comfortable at home, so I think most people would PREFER to have their supper bowel at home. It's kind of embarrassing in Church, you know?

Having a supper bowel at work is awful, especially when there’s only one stall.

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4 hours ago, Texas Heifer said:

Okay y'all. There is literally no one else I can share this with besides you guys and Bro Heifer, so please excuse me if I am being a jerk. This is...a totally believable conversation between my ex and his Plexus-shilling wife. You know, the "coach." :pb_rollseyes:

I reiterate: this is between a husband and wife. Who live together in the same house, have no children to distract them, and work in the same building in sister departments.

photostudio_1517706040828.thumb.png.4cf3eb0189ca865ebaca5c1d9bd0d908.png

HilarityRTPlexus2.png.062a684b96c03eb7ce8e2473c1ad098c.png

 

I. Cannot. Even. I have been quoting to Bro Heifer, "Babe, why did you not tell me about this. I am going to order" in a robto voice, to which he deadpans (also robto-like): "you should buy some." All day long. :pb_lol:

(Yellow is one of her fellow Plexusers, naturally.)

I hear it with the fundie-obligatory “Baaaaabe.”

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53 minutes ago, Lillymuffin said:

I hear it with the fundie-obligatory “Baaaaabe.”

And now I always will, too. :pb_lol:

ETA: Bro H and I don't call each other "babe" or "baby"--like ever. I might call him honey on occasion, but if I called him one of the former two, he'd probably want to have me tested for drugs.

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1 hour ago, Gimme a Free RV said:

Having a supper bowel at work is awful, especially when there’s only one stall.

But getting paid to bowel, can't beat that. :pb_wink:

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7 hours ago, Georgiana said:

FIRST of all, having any kind of bowel is most comfortable at home, so I think most people would PREFER to have their supper bowel at home. It's kind of embarrassing in Church, you know?

SECOND does Bro Gary know when the Super Bowl starts? It's not during church time for me, and I'm 3 hours behind Gary. How late is Gary going to stay at church?

THIRD I must confess that Cheez Whiz is a guilty pleasure of mine, and one of the things I make with it does include weens.  Going forward, I will say 100 HAY-MAYUNs as penance for partaking in the Cheez. 

Maybe his church is having a special Supper Bowel service?[/wild-ass guess]

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