Maxwell 17: Life After John Left

[mango_fandango]

I’m not really a mint fan. It reminds me too much of toothpaste. I don’t like really strong-tasting mint toothpaste/chewing gum, it feels horrible in my mouth. 

Sounds like all the Maxwell sons are assholes. Ugh. I have no hope for any of them. Steve you are a dickhead. 

[petrushka]

Re: the toothpaste travail--I left a comment on the blog which will never see the light of day. Asked Sarah why this was a problem now and certainly Nathan could ask his dentist or use his internet search skillz for some suggestions. Kids toothpaste tastes good to encourage brushing and one doesn't need much to do the job. Hope those kids get regular dental checkups but maybe they don't.  I also mentioned that perhaps they needed to supervise their children's use of the toothpaste if one of them was eating it like candy.  Wonder which little Maxwell is the guilty party?

[LilMissMetaphor]

What's next, Sarah asking us what kind of toilet paper we all buy? Calling all ass-wipe experts! You know how kids are with toilet paper.  We could really use your expertise.  

 

(I guess this technically should have been in the other thread...)

[AllisonWndrland]

1 minute ago, LilMissMetaphor said:

What's next, Sarah asking us what kind of toilet paper we all buy? Calling all ass-wipe experts! You know how kids are with toilet paper.  We could really use your expertise.  

 

We can talk about Steve's scrote all day long because Jesus, but I'd be willing to bet money toilet paper is off-limits. Too much chance for the mind to wander elsewhere. 

[usmcmom]

So over in Lori Alexander Land she's talking about breastfeeding without a cover. 

Here, the Maxwells have devoted a blog post to toothpaste!  

TOOTH. PASTE. 

What in th ever lovin' heck is wrong with these people that such little things become SO BIG?!?

Talk about majoring in all minors. These people win the prize!! 

[CyborgKin]

11 hours ago, nomoxian said:

Sarah wonders "What is it that makes children think it’s delicious?"

And why do kids love the taste of Cinnamon Toast Crunch?

[Dandruff]

2 hours ago, AllisonWndrland said:

We can talk about Steve's scrote all day long because Jesus, but I'd be willing to bet money toilet paper is off-limits. Too much chance for the mind to wander elsewhere. 

Toilet paper, hmmm.  Wonder if they ration it.

[FloraDoraDolly]

I'm old enough to remember when there was no such thing as kids' toothpaste. We just used plain Colgate or plain Crest. The idea of candy-flavored toothpaste sounds icky to me. My teeth wouldn't feel clean if I used that.

[Coconutwater]

I honestly don’t remember what kind of toothpaste I used as a kid, I’m sure my parents bought the kind for kids, I just remember feeling dirty if I didn’t brush my teeth. I’m still that way. This question did not warrant a blog post, ask your dentist and try different brands to see what works (common sense...) I would rather see more of J&C’s house. 

It looks like they are going modern except for those recliners. 

[ViolaSebastian]

1 hour ago, Dandruff said:

Toilet paper, hmmm.  Wonder if they ration it.

You know they probably have strict square limitations based on the product er...produced. 

[MamaJunebug]

5 hours ago, albanuadh_1 said:

I recall that John, as a child, said when he had kids that could eat toothpaste. it was an example how willful he was.

So it’s a multigenerational bugaboo. Steven& Teri must feel so proud. 

 

6 hours ago, IReallyAmHopewell said:

Nope. They'll be there.

 

Yes and Yes. "Children, Grandpa is going to tell you a scary story. Let's pray to calm our fears first. Amen. Now, a long time ago, Grandma made an idol out of Pepsi. ...."

The Stevehovah of Wales!  I was disappointed (I hope I have the right family!) that Benjy wasn't named Eric or something. After they lost the first girl they've had Abby, Bethany, Christina [Tina] and Drew [Andrew] ...Benjy just doesn't flow there....

I think they’re trying to go ABC on the boys. Thus Andrew then Ben., and it’s just a happy coincidence that “Drew” can continue the original ABC pattern. 

[Granwych]

4 hours ago, CyborgKin said:

16 hours ago, nomoxian said:

Sarah wonders "What is it that makes children think it’s delicious?"

And why do kids love the taste of Cinnamon Toast Crunch?

If kids will eat boogers, then just about anything is tasty.

[Dandruff]

1 hour ago, ViolaSebastian said:

You know they probably have strict square limitations based on the product er...produced. 

But do they actually monitor it...and how?

[Black Aliss]

23 hours ago, CyborgKin said:

Google tells me that professional funeral photography has become a thing in the last few years.

http://www.abc.net.au/news/2017-11-07/meet-john-slaytor-sydney-funeral-photographer/9113246

It was a thing in the early-mid 1900's. Our old photo albums are full of pictures of caskets in the living room of the deceased's family, surrounded by family members, even a few photos of the deceased lying in repose.

[BullyJBG]

4 minutes ago, Dandruff said:

But do they actually monitor it...and how?

That's what I wonder. Do they count it? Or do they just keep track of the average time between each new roll being put on the holder? Or how often they need to buy more? And the same with toothpaste, and Kleenex and anything else as such? Next; do they mention how often they do laundry and what makes them get their clothes dirty in one day? Let's go find that story of Jesus who was criticized by the Pharisees for not going through the ceremonial hand-washing before a meal with one of them?

[nomoxian]

5 hours ago, Granwych said:

If kids will eat boogers, then just about anything is tasty.

I imagine boogers taste the same as that snot that you snort back to keep it from running out of your nose. And if you have a means (hopefully a tissue and not a finger) to get it out of your body, why would you put it back in?! I was that weird kid who brought a big box of Kleenex to sit on my desk at school when I had a cold.

I also liked Cinnamon Toast Crunch (still do!) That and Quick cereal. Cinnamon or chocolate milk is yummy! I've never had them both at the same time, but now I am inspired to try

[nomoxian]

This comment in the toothpaste post really pissed me off.

Quote

For our five little ones, we use Tom’s flouride free peppermint toothpaste. We had the same problem as Nathan and Melanie with our children liking it too much. We switched to this brand, and they don’t enjoy the toothpaste as much now.

Can't let your kids have any f*n! Urg...

Quote

We used Tom’s Silly Strawberry when my son was a little boy, but your children might like that flavor too much. Have you tried just using adult toothpastes? They might feel like the mint flavoring is no temptation to eat.

How about just teaching your kids not to eat it, and supervising them when they're too young to understand fully? Though that requires parents to actually parent, and not have a litter of little ones.

Quote

Hi! I’ve been using Dr. Bronners toothpaste for years with my little ones. Just a tiny bit is needed because it’s a bit on the hot side but they eventually get use to it.

What. The. Fuck.

[elliha]

I do have a relative whose kid ate too much toothpaste and vomited from it. Sure, it was not life-threatening but I can see a parent want to avoid it. I hated kid's toothpaste as a child, I didn't like the sweet taste so I used adult tooth paste one brushing and nothing the other since my mom didn't want me to get too much fluoride from the adult stuff. Now there are plenty of minty kid pastes at least in Sweden and I always bought the minty ones for my daughter until she was old enough to ask for one of the ones with fruit flavor and I allowed her to try it and she hasn't inherited my dislike for children's tooth paste and I think she prefers the sweet tasting ones. I am still glad she is used to mint flavor so would she have to use the adult one which has happened at times she doesn't think the mint is weird.

[nastyhobbitses]

I get the concerns about kids eating toothpaste, but you could, oh, IDK, store toothpaste away from where they can get at it, teach your kid that toothpaste is not for eating and will make them sick, supervise your kid in the bathroom...you know, be a fucking adult and parent your child. 

[Eternalbluepearl]

I honestly had no idea that eating toothpaste was a thing! The things you learn on FJ and the Titus 2 blog. 

[catlady]

3 hours ago, nomoxian said:

I also liked Cinnamon Toast Crunch (still do!) That and Quick cereal. Cinnamon or chocolate milk is yummy! I've never had them both at the same time, but now I am inspired to try

Cinnamon Toast Crunch is ok, but i'm not normal and only eat cereal dry, and the sugar is too messy for me.  IMO, nothing beats generic Lucky Charms (i actually prefer the off-brand).

[HarleyQuinn]

Did they not have a conversation with their children when they learned to brush their teeth? Because I'm pretty sure "don't swallow this" was the first thing I told little Quinns when we started this. 

[lilith]

11 hours ago, Dandruff said:

But do they actually monitor it...and how?

The replacing of toilet rolls is probably scheduled. If the roll is running low and you know it’s not scheduled to be replaced til next week..... well, I imagine you would be very careful with the remaining squares.

Regarding the toothpaste thing. I actually remember eating toothpaste at a friend’s place as a kid. My mother strIctly limited sugars (only honey in the house, and that was a rare treat) and my own toothpaste was fluoride free herbal gunk. My friend had a new product - Colgate sparkle. It was glittery and sweet and came out in the shape of a shooting star. I would put a tiny bit on my finger and suck it every time I went to the bathroom there. All that to say that if the ABC kids are eating toothpaste to the point that it’s become enough of a problem to be an extended family conversation it makes me wonder if sweets are being extremely restricted. The Maxwells bake a fair bit, but they may not be getting treats at home.

Either way Nathan - if your kids are eating toothpaste the answer isn’t to look for a brand they don’t like the taste of. The answer is to supervise and teach them that toothpaste isn’t for eating, maybe storing the toothpaste out of reach til the phase passes.

[JermajestyDuggar]

When I was a kid, I kept clogging the toilet so my mom said 5 squares only! It wasn't two ply! I always used more than five. I needed at least 8!

I remember when Elaine on Seinfeld asked if the woman next to her could spare ONE square. I was like, one square is the same as nothing Elaine! 

[nastyhobbitses]

3 minutes ago, JermajestyDuggar said:

When I was a kid, I kept clogging the toilet so my mom said 5 squares only! It wasn't two ply! I always used more than five. I needed at least 8!

TMI, but there is no horror quite like your finger going through the toilet paper. 

Also TMI: in China, many public bathrooms don't have toilet paper. One time I didn't have my usual trusty packet of tissues that I kept on hand for this reason. Nature called loudly and lustily. I wiped my ass with money. It was worth maybe a fraction of a cent in USD, but I think I can call myself a real baller because I wiped my ass with money.