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Cleopatra7

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25 minutes ago, nausicaa said:

Anyone can confirm this is true? I never heard this before. 

No way. The maiden name/married name thing is mostly common in English-speaking nations; in many of the heavily Catholic cultures of Europe and Latin America it isn't standard for a woman to change her name.

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27 minutes ago, nausicaa said:

So in his post on filling in a Massachusetts marriage license, he claims that men are prohibited by Canon Law to change their surnames without a good reason and women from keeping their maiden name after marrying. Anyone can confirm this is true? I never heard this before. 

Neither have I, and I’m 65. 

This guy reminds me of someone I dated briefly in my late 20s. He was socially awkward, and, looking back, I think he might have been on the autism spectrum. We met through Mensa, and he was involved in a special interest group for transcendental meditation. He and many of the men in the group bemoaned their inability to find women who were “spiritual” enough. (He did eventually marry, and I hope he and his wife are happy.)

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1 hour ago, singsingsing said:

I'm not saying he shouldn't be criticized. I'm saying that joking about how he's 'special', 'crazy', or 'a loony toon' is probably not okay. And I'm not pointing the finger at anyone. I'm just suggesting that maybe it's possible to discuss his messed up beliefs without using language like that or mocking him for idiosyncrasies that might be associated some kind of disorder. I do also think that it's not really helpful to compare him to 'typical' hardcore orthodox/trad Catholics or fundies, because a lot of the beliefs and opinions he's espousing are probably not coming from the same place.

For the record,  I most certainly was not making fun of him by saying special.   After the video, I realized that this was not an individual that I feel I should snark on any longer.  I bowed out.  Anything I said prior was before video and I take it back.  This is a whole nother discussion, imo.  One I won't partake in.

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2 hours ago, Cleopatra7 said:

While traditionalism can be appealing to non-NTs because it provides a black and white worldview (and here I speak from experience), there are plenty of type A personalities who are also attracted to it.

As it happens, the relatives  who are traditional Catholics include a cousin whose sibling is a fundie Christian, and *both* were raised as mainline Protestants.

The Catholic relative married into the RC church, so to speak, while the fundie relative spent time as a young adult with another family branch who were all fundie and then became entrenched in it. 

All this to say, you just can't always predict who in a family will either veer into or away from religious extremism.

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8 hours ago, anjulibai said:

Oh my god there is so much to snark on. WTF with all those pictures of women with hands over their hearts? Just...the fuck? And he randomly lists his favorite names because....why? His wife can be an architect, but he'd prefer she didn't work? 

What a little shit. I wonder why he's not married. *rolls eyes* I guess there are no women in his required age range that goes to his church. 

I believe those are the names he prefers in a wife. Jillian Mary etc. Note: no straight up Mary. At first I thought those were names of future children but being all female it must be for his wife. So Neveah need not apply.

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8 hours ago, nausicaa said:

I understand how Traditionalists can try to rationalize their sexism, but how do they defend their racism from a Catholic point of view?

Racism is not a Catholic tenant and on his post blaming DACA for him not being employed for being a "real" Catholic he slams bishops, cardinals, and priests who support DACA. He is a racist entitled white male who really thinks his qualification for a job and wife are because he is a "real" Catholic. He leaves out the fact that he is a racist and sexist and that is probably why he hasn't had luck finding a mate or employment. He may not be NT but he is a terrible person from this things he writes about women and minorities. 

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7 hours ago, nausicaa said:

I understand how Traditionalists can try to rationalize their sexism, but how do they defend their racism from a Catholic point of view?

In my experience, it usually boils down to the following:

1. An agreement with Hillaire Belloc that, “The Church is Europe and Europe is the Church.” If you believe this to be true, non-Europeans will never be able to have the same connection with the Catholic Church that whites do. At best, they can be imitators of proper European Catholicism.

2. An extreme Eurocentrism that posits that non- white Christians, Catholic or otherwise, are “doing Christianity wrong” since the Tridentine Latin Mass is objectively the best form of worship.

3. White tribalism that views non-whites, even fellow Catholics, as interlopers (see point one)

As for the relationship between being non NT, having a separate mental illness, and being attracted to some kind of extreme religion, I have a few ideas. I have a theory that being a minister, priest, rabbi, imam, etc can be a useful staging ground for sociopaths to manipulate people in a physically non-violent way. When these manipulations turn physically violent is how we things like the Tate-LaBianca murders, the Jonestown massacre, and the Branch Davidian fire. This doesn’t apply to Whittle, since he’s just a layman with a frustrated desire to get married. But it does show that a cult environment causes members to share in the delusions of their leaders. 

Based on my own experiences, I believe that being in a very rigid religious atmosphere is not doing Whittle any favors. Conservative and traditionalist Catholics tend to look down on the idea of community, which they view as a Vatican II buzzword. The people in my old Latin Mass parish were very self-absorbed and very much into cultivating their own “holiness” at the expense of creating a real parish community. It was sort of like being around a bunch of strangers who would be superficially nice to you in face to face interactions, but would talk smack about you for being a “heretic” behind your back. There were cliques but no real sense of community or belonging and it was like that by design. 

If Whittle was at a more mainstream parish, I think it would be much easier for him to make friends and find a potential spouse. There would probably even be resources to help him find a job through something like the St Vincent de Paul Society or another ministry, even though it might not be the kind of job he feels entitled to have. However, because he is knee-jerk against “social justice” programs at the parish level, he’s cutting himself off from resources that could help him with some of his problems, and chances are his fellow trads are too self-absorbed to care about him.

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8 hours ago, nausicaa said:

So in his post on filling in a Massachusetts marriage license, he claims that men are prohibited by Canon Law to change their surnames without a good reason and women from keeping their maiden name after marrying. Anyone can confirm this is true? I never heard this before. 

This doesn't pass the bullshit smell test. I live in a very Catholic country and no woman among my direct ancestor ever changed her last name after marriage, going back at least 200 yrs.

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26 minutes ago, Cleopatra7 said:

In my experience, it usually boils down to the following:

1. An agreement with Hillaire Belloc that, “The Church is Europe and Europe is the Church.” If you believe this to be true, non-Europeans will never be able to have the same connection with the Catholic Church that whites do. At best, they can be imitators of proper European Catholicism.

2. An extreme Eurocentrism that posits that non- white Christians, Catholic or otherwise, are “doing Christianity wrong” since the Tridentine Latin Mass is objectively the best form of worship.

3. White tribalism that views non-whites, even fellow Catholics, as interlopers (see point one)

As for the relationship between being non NT, having a separate mental illness, and being attracted to some kind of extreme religion, I have a few ideas. I have a theory that being a minister, priest, rabbi, imam, etc can be a useful staging ground for sociopaths to manipulate people in a physically non-violent way. When these manipulations turn physically violent is how we things like the Tate-LaBianca murders, the Jonestown massacre, and the Branch Davidian fire. This doesn’t apply to Whittle, since he’s just a layman with a frustrated desire to get married. But it does show that a cult environment causes members to share in the delusions of their leaders. 

Based on my own experiences, I believe that being in a very rigid religious atmosphere is not doing Whittle any favors. Conservative and traditionalist Catholics tend to look down on the idea of community, which they view as a Vatican II buzzword. The people in my old Latin Mass parish were very self-absorbed and very much into cultivating their own “holiness” at the expense of creating a real parish community. It was sort of like being around a bunch of strangers who would be superficially nice to you in face to face interactions, but would talk smack about you for being a “heretic” behind your back. There were cliques but no real sense of community or belonging and it was like that by design. 

If Whittle was at a more mainstream parish, I think it would be much easier for him to make friends and find a potential spouse. There would probably even be resources to help him find a job through something like the St Vincent de Paul Society or another ministry, even though it might not be the kind of job he feels entitled to have. However, because he is knee-jerk against “social justice” programs at the parish level, he’s cutting himself off from resources that could help him with some of his problems, and chances are his fellow trads are too self-absorbed to care about him.

He is so strange that even to other people at his parish he probably scares them off when he starts talking or ranting. Him being so rad trad and not NT makes a hard combination because he doesn't seem to have any friends from his blog, is unemployed, and with no acces to public transportation I assume he can't drive he really is cut off. This probably isn't helping him mentally and is adding fuel to the fire for his religious persecution complex.

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@fundiefun, you are absolutely correct about racism being incompatible with the teachings of the Roman Catholic Church. In the Catholic Bible my parents gave me for a wedding present back in 1973, there are writings about the contemporary Church which state that racism is a sin. There are similar comments in the new catechism that was published under John Paul II.

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In his post about getting the Boston Archbishop "fired" he says that everything went to hell in a handbasket when Cardinal Law was made to step down. He liked Cardinal Law and wishes he were back.  To refresh your memories Cardinal Law was the one who hid all the priest sex abuse cases in Boston for many, many years.

He also rants against social justice, which is a big part of our faith, dating back before Vatican II.  St Vincent de Paul Society, Catholic relief charities anyone?

I found it interesting that he wrote that when he turned 18 he went full on Trad and that no one (family incl) had any legal or ecclesiastical right to make him change his mind because he was a legal adult.  His Christmas message post about living in a small room, but preferring to be on the street, except for his thyroid condition, rather than in public housing, makes me think he lives in some sort of adult group home or assisted living situation.

I agree he is likely non-NT but with enough skills to get around on the bus and complete an AA degree.  However the vehemence of his anger at not having a wife and his diatribes at all the other Catholics (who aren't a true Catholics because they aren't as Trad as he is) are disturbing.  For the sake of those around him, I sincerely hope he isn't given to physical violence as a way to express himself.

Edited by Red Hair, Black Dress
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1 hour ago, Red Hair, Black Dress said:

I However the vehemence of his anger at not having a wife and his diatribes at all the other Catholics (who aren't a true Catholics because they aren't as Trad as he is) are disturbing.  For the sake of those around him, I sincerely hope he isn't given to physical violence as a way to express himself.

As a woman who has an online dating profile, I can't even begin to tell you how many guys there are out there like this. It's really scary to realize.

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The closest we get to religious wackiness in the UK is this guy: https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Jacob_Rees-Mogg 

Check out the names of his kids, especially the sixth who was born in July. He is anti-abortion, anti-same sex marriage, etc. He also likes attending the Tridentine Latin Mass when he can. His kids go to a school with a very bizarre uniform, including breeches and cravats (see spoiler), it’s called Hill House International Junior School. Interestingly it isn’t Catholic.

Spoiler

C7B12571-C428-4161-A62C-EC8F465B6991.jpeg.f2b3f019f2b65dc44bef83aff97ae7ac.jpeg

 

Edited by mango_fandango
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I've read the posts that we're linked here, and I'm... worried. I really hope and pray that he is not a danger to himself or others. There is NOTHING wrong with not being neurotypical, or with having mental health struggles...but it seems like maybe he should talk to a counselor or therapist.

Edited by PopRox
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Wow. I mean in a way I feel bad for this guy because it's surely something that he latched onto and he's not neuro typical. That being said, his beliefs are harmful, he's not going to find what he's looking for either. Whether that's a good or bad thing I'm not certain. 

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23 hours ago, anjulibai said:

This is his intro video from when he started this blog. He's definitely "off". 

https://catholiclookforwife.blogspot.com/2010/07/intro-video.html

Yeah...from that, my immediate thought is maybe somewhere on the autism spectrum or severe social anxiety. I don't mean that to excuse any douchebaggery but his obsession with Catholicism would also play into an ASD diagnosis possibly and not completely understanding how that obsession translates to other people? 

Something is off. He's not cognitively delayed at all by his writings but let's presume he filmed that a bunch of times to get the "best" take and that's still what he posted? Plus that no one has really ever replied seriously as a prospect in so many years and the lack of job even with qualifications...if he was plain narcissistic and therefore that confident in his views, you wouldn't see such palpable anxiety and jarring speech. You would see that though in someone on the spectrum or someone with social anxiety disorder. Not that either of those make you an asshole, but maybe the traditional Catholic church gave him somewhere to belong?

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I'm a good looking victim, feel sorry for me and date me.

Spoiler

Monday, April 17, 2017

I hope you had a good Easter

I hope all my readers had a good and blessed Easter Sunday! 

 

Unfortunately, my situation has not changed. Hope does spring eternal, but up here in New England it's less likely. It was 80°F yesterday, the first time in a while it was that hot on an April Easter up here. I went to a restaurant for dinner, my first meat products since Mardi Gras were lamb, roast beef, and pork. At this place there were plenty of pregnant mommies and women (young to middle-aged) wearing sleeveless dresses, something I've not seen on Easter ever. (I went to an Easter Vigil the previous night.) 

 

As a man it is very natural to be attracted to women and smile at baby bumps, knowing that Mrs. X is going to give birth in the near future. I would consider myself hyper-attractive, and therefore would not make it as a priest or monk. (Don't get me started about married priests!) This is another reason why God created marriage. 

 

We are all called to celibacy at some point, for which I am discriminated against for holding this viewpoint. I can say that I have been chaste all my life and will not change until I find that Catholic sweetheart, if I do find her.

 

Because I support the institution of Holy Matrimony and loathe divorce, etc., I am also discriminated against, not only by some older liberal folks, but by persons my age, and also, yes, the modern-day Catholic hierarchy. There is one major U.S. archdiocese (which I will not disclose the city) that requires a pornographic Pre-Cana course and retreat where the engaged couple sleeps together with free condoms provided. This archdiocese also doesn't allow parish priests to schedule weddings for their own parishioners! (Quite a few Canon Law violations) 

 

May 13th is the 100th anniversary of the beginning of the Fatima Apparitions. Priests have been granted permission to use the Mass texts from the Feast of the Immaculate Heart of Mary (Aug. 22nd) to say a Votive Mass of the First Class in lieu of the Feast of St. Robert Bellarmine (who wrote several theological opinions on how to depose a Pope). Please pray. 

I'd really like to know which archdiocese he's talking about.  Definitely not my archdiocese.

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Did you guys see his post where he said that nightly sex was mandatory in a marriage?  Because BABIES!  But he also says sex must not be denied due to age, so there goes the 'babies' argument.  And yet this Prince Charming hasn't found his 'Catholic Sweetheart' yet... shocker.  

I believe from skimming through this blog today that he lives with his parents - who he seems to have no respect for since they aren't Catholic enough for his liking. 

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@Flossie  yes exactly.

Knowing he seems to like ER, is what concerns me about this guy.  His story thus far seems to track ER's -- especially the not being able to get a girlfriend. part  He's been trying 8-9 years now with absolutely no luck, not even a nibble.

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Quote

There is one major U.S. archdiocese (which I will not disclose the city) that requires a pornographic Pre-Cana course and retreat where the engaged couple sleeps together with free condoms provided. This archdiocese also doesn't allow parish priests to schedule weddings for their own parishioners! (Quite a few Canon Law violations) 

I can say with certainty that there is no U.S. archdiocese that "requires a pornographic Pre-Cana course and retreat where the engaged couple sleeps together with free condoms provided," but it's now obvious that he is gullible enough to believe crazy internet rumors. 

Edited by Howl
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