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Kendra and Joe Duggar 6: Sitting in a tree...M.A.R.R.I.E.D!


samurai_sarah

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23 hours ago, Hmmm_idolatry said:

Snipped.  I'd like to know more about what type of education they receive in regard to being in relationships and even understanding sex and the feelings that go along with sexual relationships.  I strongly suspect they get basically zero education on this topic, and I'm morbidly curious to know whether or not they're absolutely terrified on their wedding nights.  I suspect that they are to some degree, and my heart goes out to them. 

Obviously everyone's different but I can confirm the terror. I got married on my 18th birthday after being raised in a fundylite homeschooling house. The thing of it is my parents ADORED my then boyfriend and his parents and thus let me visit him in his home country regularly so we had lots of *ahem* alone time and even still we spent most of our wedding night watching Disney channel absolutely sick with nervousness. We've both since left religion and have enjoyed 8 years of fabulous intimacy but the first few weeks were hard :p. I can't imagine never even being alone and then concieving...

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2 hours ago, 2manyKidzzz said:

But....oatmeal cookies are not chocolate chip cookies...are they......

Oatmeal chocolate chip cookies are the best of both worlds!

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On 9/20/2017 at 8:49 AM, allthegoodnamesrgone said:

Maybe they will go to Disney World.

Don't wish that giggling encrusted PDA on us!  We just had a hurricane.  That's enough for one season!

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On 21/09/2017 at 7:10 AM, Lurky said:

The depressing thing is, most girls who go through a giggly phase grow out of it...  and their boyfriends of the time.  I'm sad Kendra is married to her first BF.

(And yes, I know some of the FJers married that young, and to their first love and it went well - BUT they all had a ton more experience, and were allowed to hold their BF's hand, and see him without a chaperone.  This isn't about young marriage, it's about exceptionally sheltered girls married off to a guy they believe they couldn't be alone with before marriage, or touch his hand, because it would be a sin)

I wonder to what extent a 'giggly phase' is performative. I know I myself had a giggly phase in my mid-teens and I know it was just me attempting to perform femininity to the max because I was sad and single and wanted to be cute. Of course, a lot of young teenage girls are just naturally giggly, but it brings a lot of question into culture and the pressures many young girls feel. Kendra of course lives in a world of very binaristic, rigid world views so not surprised that she's expected to perform femininity to a much larger extent. 

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Already covered. I concur that the cookies were made post-engagement, pre-wedding. Corrected on location as well. I thought that was the Pool  House fridge, but upon reflection, there is a lot more space in that kitchen than the guest house one. 

I figured Disney for the honeymoon, but with the hurricane, that would have been scrapped. I just can't picture those two going out of the country. Maybe they went to a dude ranch in Montana. :D

Edited by marmalade
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On 9/20/2017 at 10:34 PM, Hmmm_idolatry said:

I agree with all of this.  Seeing her in that episode with the rollerblading just made me sad.  She seemed so young in terms of her personality.  It seems like these sheltered teens are encouraged to stay so young and sheltered until their wedding days, where they are then expected to become fully sexual adults in a committed relationship within a matter of hours.  I'd like to know more about what type of education they receive in regard to being in relationships and even understanding sex and the feelings that go along with sexual relationships.  I strongly suspect they get basically zero education on this topic, and I'm morbidly curious to know whether or not they're absolutely terrified on their wedding nights.  I suspect that they are to some degree, and my heart goes out to them. 

Agreed JB tells her headship day of the wedding that it's like leggos.

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19 hours ago, mizandry said:

Not trying to attack anyone here, but honestly, the whole giggly girl = annoying narrative grates me to no end. If she were to laugh like that into her 80s, I frankly would not give a damn. I guess this topic is a little too BEC for me, idk.

It's just that, as far as I'm concerned, critiquing how women and girls laugh is yet another example of how we, intentionally or not, 'train' women to hate themselves and deny their natural instincts for the sake of performing for everyone else's approval. If giggling is what helps Kendra to deal with the circumstances of her life, shit... go for it! She can laugh like a fucking hyena for all I care. It's a knee-jerk reaction. I feel gross seeing this used as an example of her infantilization. She has a distinctive laugh. It'd probably be her laugh if she grew up in a normal, less oppressive household as well.

I mean I also say this as a 23 year old who giggles A LOT and has been treated like shit for it in an extremely sexist way from teenhood on, by all genders. I literally can't help how I laugh. The fact that I even feel inclined to explain why I laugh the way I do, that I've even had to analyze it because OTHERS do all the time, is kind of indicative of just how deeply entrenched misogyny really is in our communities. Women are constantly having to monitor how they express being nervous or happy or really any genuine, authentic emotion. I'd rather not perpetuate that.

Thank you for this -- I'm in my mid-30s and I've always been a giggler. It's just how I laugh, and it makes me happy, and I've gotten so much shit for it. People just assume you must be a ditzy girl who can't string a sentence together. I'm in the last stretch of a PhD now, but I giggle and smile a lot (and wear sundresses and polka dots) and I have actually had people laugh out loud when I tell them I'm going to be a historian. There is so much misogyny (internalized and otherwise) about giggling and girly things, and I wish people would question that more.

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15 hours ago, marmalade said:

I figured Disney for the honeymoon, but with the hurricane, that would have been scrapped. I just can't picture those two going out of the country. Maybe they went to a dude ranch in Montana. :D

If they don't have a big international honeymoon extravaganza sponsored by TLC, I can picture them going the Brandon and Michael Keilen route.

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15 hours ago, marmalade said:

I figured Disney for the honeymoon, but with the hurricane, that would have been scrapped. I just can't picture those two going out of the country. Maybe they went to a dude ranch in Montana. :D

I'm LOLing so hard at this. You know you're too young to get married if that's where people think your honeymoon will be. :pb_lol:  As the fundie wedding age gets lower I'm just picturing some of these fundie kidults at legoland for their honeymoon. 

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On September 20, 2017 at 5:03 PM, Howl said:

Wait, what?  I wondered what TTH stood for, thought about it and decided it was the acronym for Tontitown house.  Is it something else?

I did too!!

and I'm so rarely on the actual computer,  I didn't realize for months that the acronyms are on there when you hover.  But I was more concentrated on SOTDRT

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22 hours ago, Kolcatta said:

I wonder to what extent a 'giggly phase' is performative. I know I myself had a giggly phase in my mid-teens and I know it was just me attempting to perform femininity to the max because I was sad and single and wanted to be cute.

I find this quite interesting because I'm so reminded of my reaction of "this is such bullshit" when I read scenes where a girl is 'giggling', 'running her arm up and down his' or 'batting her eyelashes' to flirt. Even as a kid I was like, 'what? People do that? I don't trust you, Jessica Wakefield!" 'I've literally done zero of these things. Maybe I'm just a terrible flirt.  It's harder to tell a true laugh of course, but do poeple ACTUALLY BAT EYELASHES?! F'n bizarre.

Her laugh still drives me insane. She's seems relatively nice from what we know of her, but like Janice from friends, no thanks.

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I have to admit it...when I see the title of this thread, in my mind I always add, "...and Soon to Be, P.R.E.G.N.A.N.T.!"

I really, really hope that will not be the case, if for no other reason than because I'd like to see Joe and Kendra be able to spend at least a few months just being a couple before adding babies to the mix.

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6 hours ago, faraway said:

As the fundie wedding age gets lower I'm just picturing some of these fundie kidults at legoland for their honeymoon. 

They can swing by Sesame Place as well.

Edited by GreyhoundFan
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9 hours ago, Jinder Roles said:

In a TLC interview with Jana and JoKen, they mention that they're trying to finish the building of a house before they get married. 

Nice catch!

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What do these fundies have against putting their hair up while cooking? Yuck! Kendra's hair all down and she was making cookies. Also, what nut job thought she could cream that sugar and butter with a whisk? SMH

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8 minutes ago, divadivine said:

What do these fundies have against putting their hair up while cooking? Yuck! Kendra's hair all down and she was making cookies. Also, what nut job thought she could cream that sugar and butter with a whisk? SMH

I noticed that too. I love my kitchen aid but i didn't earn that bad boy until i was 44 years old. But a hand held mixer would've so much less work. 

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8 hours ago, Jana814 said:

What did they for their honeymoon?  

They were staying in a little B&B in the Rockies (Montana, IIRC) just doing some outdoorsy stuff, and otherwise probably enjoying finally being alone together.

I always wonder if the Duggar kidults really want these big international honeymoons or if it's just another plot line for TLC. I imagine if I were finally alone with my husband for the very first time after getting married, I would want to use that time to just spend together. You know, maybe not get out of bed for a whole day. Or just relaxing by the pool, talking. But not feeling like you have this (possibly) once-in-a-lifetime opportunity to see Rome/Paris/Sydney/whatever and therefore you just have to be out and about every minute of the day, sightseeing and exploring. But maybe that's just me.

Edited by JillyO
Should have proofread before.
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did anyone watch the videos with jana in them? I thought it looked a lot like Jessas house? the colour of the couch, and it seemed like one of the pics in the background was J+B + JinJer? So maybe they are fixing up their house and B+J have moved?

Or maybe I'm just really tired and waaaay off :D

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