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Duggars by the Dozen 30 - On a Mission from GOD!


choralcrusader8613

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I'm glad Marjorie dodged that bullet, and I suspect that the breakup was a combination of her just not being interested in Josiah (who seems sweet enough, but doesn't seem like he could keep up with her - she's very active and independent with lots of initiative and creativity, and he's...a Duggar boy) and her thinking about her own brand. She's going for that fundie-lite lifestyle blogger/writer/walking Pinterest board deal, and marrying into a controversial family at 19 would likely be a net loss for her. Sure, it's exposure, but she walked in right when Josh Scandal Numero Uno broke, and considering some of the things Jill said to Megyn Kelly, I wouldn't be surprised if she or her family knew about more stuff/rumors that could come out. Gossip travels fast in isolated circles. She wasn't about to hitch her wagon to that mess.

I have a sinking feeling that she's a Girl Defined kinda girl and I'd find her beliefs repulsive, but she's smart and she's got hustle for days. Can't fault her for that.

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Here's my question about JB and M:

My sister and a load of my friends are all struggling with Boomer parents becoming crazed grandparents who seem to have thrown every idea about child-raising out of the window now they have grandkids - you know, like when we were kids, our parents restricted sweets and chocolates and wouldn't let us go to McDonalds, didn't like us wearing trendy clothing, didn't give us presents outside of birthdays and Xmas etc etc etc, but now they're giving the grandkids every kind of treat imaginable.  Undermining their own kids to spoil the grandkids.  Getting really pissy about not being able to see the grandkids whenever they want, when they only took us to see our grandparents once a year because they didn't like their parents interfering, and so on and so on.

So I wonder what JB and M are like as grandparents, if they want to spoil Spurgeon and Israel etc and treat the M kids differently to the Lost Girls the same age?

Or whether, seeing as the M'Slaves were sister moms, JB & M have always treated the Lost Girls and younger Lost Boys as grandchildren anyway?

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Although I do not have grand kids, I think of them as being spoiled by grandparents. My son would spend the summer with my parents when he was grade school age before they moved closer to us. Mom would take the kids to orthodontist appointments and then take them for milkshakes after. Dad helped teach my son to drive and also drive a stick shift car. 

That said, I don't think JB and M are like that. They are too busy :output_eeMbjt:

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2 hours ago, Lurky said:

So I wonder what JB and M are like as grandparents, if they want to spoil Spurgeon and Israel etc and treat the M kids differently to the Lost Girls the same age?

The answer? Absentee, disinterested and disengaged. 

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2 hours ago, SassyPants said:

The answer? Absentee, disinterested and disengaged. 

Basically the same qualities as their parenting, too.

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Or I can imagine them if they did spoil them to spoil only for the first year or two and pass it on, kind of like what they've done to their children.

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10 minutes ago, candygirl200413 said:

Or I can imagine them if they did spoil them to spoil only for the first year or two and pass it on, kind of like what they've done to their children.

I bet grandchildren to JB and Michelle feels just like parenting. I mean, they can hand the baby back to their daughter/daughter-in-law and go about their business, just as they did with their own children. 

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3 minutes ago, curlykate said:

Or, spoil until the next one comes along, and then move on to the shiny new baby, and forget the previous one. 

They pretty much said this in one of the early specials. Michelle was each baby's 1st "buddy" for a few months (I think it was until they were weaned?), then they got their official sibling buddy. So, just in time for the next impending birth. 

5 hours ago, Lurky said:

Or whether, seeing as the M'Slaves were sister moms, JB & M have always treated the Lost Girls and younger Lost Boys as grandchildren anyway?

Not surprising that there would be a "generation gap" within that big of a set of kids, even just from the age range alone, not factoring in the whole sister mom thing.

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6 hours ago, December said:

They pretty much said this in one of the early specials. Michelle was each baby's 1st "buddy" for a few months (I think it was until they were weaned?), then they got their official sibling buddy. So, just in time for the next impending birth. 

This is correct. She did say that. Can't remember which special though. She was very proud of herself when she said it though.

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Despite the fact their grandkids are over at TTH all the time Michelle and Jim Bob are probably more like those grandparents who live far away and they don't see. Michelle doesn't seem like she knows who her own kids are so I'd be surprised if she knows who her grandchildren are or their names. 

 

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Michelle doesn't seem like a particularly interactive grandma. I can't remember her ever holding one of the babies although she must have at some point. Maybe Mack. JB has been bragging about his 200 future grandkids since Josie was born.  I think they won't spoil them since they know they can't do it for all. I would not be surprised if they played favorites at some point. 

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Just now, Fluffy14 said:

What university is JBU?

Jim Bob University. They teach you how to grift and ignore your children. :pb_lol:

I know that's not the right answer, but I'm blanking on the name.

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Weird comment of the day: I was perusing the interwebz on my lunch break and my office mate commented on the story about Natalee Holloway's alleged remains. 

"Is that Jana? Why is she on CNN?"

Now I can't unsee it.

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13 hours ago, curlykate said:

Or, spoil until the next one comes along, and then move on to the shiny new baby, and forget the previous one. 

This is precisely what I think happens - the youngest grandbaby is the chosen one......until the next one is popped out and then they are yesterday's news. 

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6 hours ago, LawsonBatesEgo said:

This is precisely what I think happens - the youngest grandbaby is the chosen one......until the next one is popped out and then they are yesterday's news. 

I wonder if once Jinger has kids they'd be treated any differently, since they'll live far away and won't see JB and M as much. Or maybe that distance will help them see how crazy their grandparents are. 

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On 8/24/2017 at 7:25 AM, Lurky said:

Here's my question about JB and M:

My sister and a load of my friends are all struggling with Boomer parents becoming crazed grandparents who seem to have thrown every idea about child-raising out of the window now they have grandkids - you know, like when we were kids, our parents restricted sweets and chocolates and wouldn't let us go to McDonalds, didn't like us wearing trendy clothing, didn't give us presents outside of birthdays and Xmas etc etc etc, but now they're giving the grandkids every kind of treat imaginable.  Undermining their own kids to spoil the grandkids.  Getting really pissy about not being able to see the grandkids whenever they want, when they only took us to see our grandparents once a year because they didn't like their parents interfering, and so on and so on.

So I wonder what JB and M are like as grandparents, if they want to spoil Spurgeon and Israel etc and treat the M kids differently to the Lost Girls the same age?

Or whether, seeing as the M'Slaves were sister moms, JB & M have always treated the Lost Girls and younger Lost Boys as grandchildren anyway?

Ugh, my parents are like this as grandparents.  They help me so much though that I feel bad reprimanding them for all of the spoiling and the sugar.  I don' see JB and M acting like this at all, but maybe Grandma Mary a little bit-especially with Amy.  Maybe Grandma Mary spoils the Duggarlings when JB and M aren't around.  JB especially seems too stingy to be a spoiling grandparent.

Also @Coconut Flan that article was really interesting and explained a lot of questions I have about these groups' interaction with society.   

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@freshlemonade That thing where you're grateful for the help, so find it hard to say "hang on, can we work by MY rules?" is something my sister and my friends really struggle with.  Especially when they have asked, in a nice, polite way, that eg the grandfather doesn't give chocolate to the kids before lunch, and 10 mins later, there he is, handing out the sweets like it's the end of the world tonight.

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Its really hard when you feel you need them.  Or when they visit for a week but live far away.  Its really hard then to say no, you can't have the relationship you want.  On the other hand I'm a horrible DIL and am totally willing to cut them off.  I would have a harder time with my parents, but they obey my rules with only some snarking about being over protective.  

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Spoiler Alert- This GM spoils like rotten- she also reprimands for inappropriate behavior, and places on Time Out, if needed!

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My granddaughters and I have a deal.  We don't tell their parents how I spoil them but they have to do what I say (cleaning, bedtime, etc)  They are 9 and 7 and we've had this deal for 2 years and it works great.

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12 minutes ago, Grannie2times said:

My granddaughters and I have a deal.  We don't tell their parents how I spoil them but they have to do what I say (cleaning, bedtime, etc)  They are 9 and 7 and we've had this deal for 2 years and it works great.

I love this, good negotiating!  

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