Real Life Fundie Encounters - Part 4

[PumaLover]

I have never heard of Blue Laws before and this is fascinating (and infuriating!). What is the reason stores couldn't sell feminine products or diapers? I can see not selling alcohol at certain times but really, diapers?

I have lived in California my entire adult life, and you can buy beer, wine and hard liquor at grocery stores. They even have a liquor aisle at CVS! (For those not familiar it's a pharmacy/grocery kind of store). I went to visit my dad this summer in Alabama and smuggled a bottle of vodka just in case liquor wasn't sold in his county, LOL. I found out that they sold beer and wine at grocery stores but no hard alcohol. It was surprising for me.

[Briefly]

4 minutes ago, PumaLover said:

I have never heard of Blue Laws before and this is fascinating (and infuriating!). What is the reason stores couldn't sell feminine products or diapers? I can see not selling alcohol at certain times but really, diapers?

I have lived in California my entire adult life, and you can buy beer, wine and hard liquor at grocery stores. They even have a liquor aisle at CVS! (For those not familiar it's a pharmacy/grocery kind of store). I went to visit my dad this summer in Alabama and smuggled a bottle of vodka just in case liquor wasn't sold in his county, LOL. I found out that they sold beer and wine at grocery stores but no hard alcohol. It was surprising for me.

Here's an article from Wikipedia about them.  It's Wikipedia so there may be inaccuracies.

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Blue_laws_in_the_United_States

 

[PumaLover]

6 minutes ago, Briefly said:

Here's an article from Wikipedia about them.  It's Wikipedia so there may be inaccuracies.

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Blue_laws_in_the_United_States

 

Wow, that is really surprising. Thank you for the link. Why would hunting be banned on Sundays? That's crazy! I guess so you spend your day off going to church and spending time with family. I guess I've been in my liberal state for so long that I can't even conceive of laws like this. California only tells you when you can and can't water your lawn.

Also, this law made me giggle: 

Florida–

Several counties prohibit the sale of alcohol and sex toys on Sunday and during certain hours.

[SoSoNosy]

Memphis had Blue Law rules for decades!  There were stories about doctors writing prescriptions for needed things like fuses, diapers, etc; anything a doctor wrote could be legally sold. It was stupid.

[WhatWouldJohnCrichtonDo?]

For a state by state summary of liquor laws, this website is pretty good.

http://www.stateliquorlaws.com/map

I don't think it goes down to the county or city level, but it does include all 50 U.S. states. 

[smittykins]

I never knew NY doesn't allow alcohol to be sold within 200 feet of a school/church.  Interesting. 

[Pammy]

In my area of Canada (pot now legal!) alcohol has been sold only in liquor stores for my whole life. Kids were not allowed in the stores. As a kid, literally the first time I had seen alcohol for sale was on vacation with my parents at a gas station in the US. I remember feeling just shocked, even asking may parents if it really was alcohol — just out there stacked in a pyramid! 

I was doubly scandalized by the connection between drinking and driving. (Because it was a gas station convenience store, which implied to me that they sold mostly ‘things you might need during a drive’.)

[Briefly]

32 minutes ago, Pammy said:

In my area of Canada (pot now legal!) alcohol has been sold only in liquor stores for my whole life. Kids were not allowed in the stores. As a kid, literally the first time I had seen alcohol for sale was on vacation with my parents at a gas station in the US. I remember feeling just shocked, even asking may parents if it really was alcohol — just out there stacked in a pyramid! 

I was doubly scandalized by the connection between drinking and driving. (Because it was a gas station convenience store, which implied to me that they sold mostly ‘things you might need during a drive’.)

The laws are still age 21 for going into liquor stores in Oklahoma but there is no ruling on that as far as convenience stores and grocery stores are concerned; just that under age 21 can not purchase it.  I think that there is possibly another attempt at lowering the age to 18, which is cigarette legal age.

[Aine]

On 10/17/2018 at 9:22 PM, SoSoNosy said:

Memphis had Blue Law rules for decades!  There were stories about doctors writing prescriptions for needed things like fuses, diapers, etc; anything a doctor wrote could be legally sold. It was stupid.

I bet you don't live far from me  I'm in North Mississippi. Hearing stories about how it used to be here and in Memphis always makes me thankful that it isn't as restrictive as it once was. I only really 'register' the restrictions when friends from out of town come and stay and then what has been habitual to me for a long time seems so backward when I say it aloud. I've got used to the ones we have here but they also don't have any restrictions on anything but alcohol and sex toys.

[klein_roeschen]

Meanwhile in germany, every supermarket has a varying variety of booze, you can choose from. Outside the opening hours, wich the law in my state says are 6am to 12pm and closed on sunday, you can get it from the one gas station, who is open around the clock. Teens 16 and older can get buy beer and wine, as long as it has no more than 10% alcohol in it and at 18 you get everything you want. And in my part we have some kind of celebration for 14 year olds called "Jugendweihe". It's like confirmation at a church, only an atheistic celebration to welcome them in the circle of adulds. In the afternoon, they have party at home with family and friends, where they get cash from everyone as a present and their first hard liquor and are allowed to trink with the adulds.

I don't know if it counts as fundie encouters, but I live about 300 m away from the local mormon church, if you can call it a church. They have rented a few rooms in building that contains shops and apartment. They are above a pharmacy and beauty parlor and across the floor is a general physician. And everytime they get a new batch of missionaries, they want to talk to me about god, when I just walk my dog. I pity them a little, because here are not many people interessed in even talking about god, let alone become mormon. But I also hope, that my heathen part of germany have at least a little bit of a good impression on them.

And 15 years ago I had a rather nasty encouter with the Jehowa's witnesses. In the morning, my mother was taken to the hospital and on life support with hardly any brain activity left. And in the afternoon, 2 women from the JW stand in front of our door and wanted to offer their support in our hour of need. We didn't know any JW personally and I still don't know how they get to know this and our adress to come to our door.

[feministxtian]

19 hours ago, klein_roeschen said:

And 15 years ago I had a rather nasty encouter with the Jehowa's witnesses. In the morning, my mother was taken to the hospital and on life support with hardly any brain activity left. And in the afternoon, 2 women from the JW stand in front of our door and wanted to offer their support in our hour of need. We didn't know any JW personally and I still don't know how they get to know this and our adress to come to our door.

Let me let you in on a nasty secret about the JWs. They often have people working in hospitals...they call their "pioneers" and give them information so they can try to recruit you in your dark time. They also read obituaries and come visit. I bodily removed 2 from my front door a week after the mother died. 

[Jana814]

13 minutes ago, feministxtian said:

Let me let you in on a nasty secret about the JWs. They often have people working in hospitals...they call their "pioneers" and give them information so they can try to recruit you in your dark time. They also read obituaries and come visit. I bodily removed 2 from my front door a week after the mother died. 

Oh my that’s horrible!!  So sorry that happened to you. 

[feministxtian]

Just now, Jana814 said:

Oh my that’s horrible!!  So sorry that happened to you. 

In the mood I was in, it was great fun. I know who sent them...my husband's X-bitch is a JW....

[Briefly]

I have had JW's on my doorstep a few times but they have always been polite.  There was one particular older gentleman that used to come by when we lived in Tulsa.  He was always very polite and actually a nice person, I enjoyed talking to him.  But I think that maybe he was unusual, from what I have heard from other people who have had discussions with them.

The Mormons are the ones I've gotten cross-ways with.  They don't like to hear the word NO and don't generally listen.  I had a couple of young men literally tell me that I needed to listen to them, because what they had to say was so much more important than the breathing treatment I was giving to my asthmatic toddler!  It was one of the few times I used language my mother would not have approved of to total strangers when I ordered them off my property!

But then a couple of weeks ago, there was a small group of Mormons in the Dollar Store when we were shopping there.  It was pouring rain and I think they ducked in the door to dry out.  I felt kind of sorry for them.  They were actually very polite, and were concerned that we might get caught in the rain when we left.  It is possible that we might have reminded them of their parents!

[Paige1]

If this is in the wrong place let me know...

So I have an interesting situation..... My long time friend turned boyfriends parents. They apparently in the 8 years I have known him have taken the slow slide into fundy land. They have always been on the line. No vaccine, home schooled, for the most part home churched. My Boyfriend never was really allowed friend or just interaction with kids his age. He is an anomaly for how he turned out to be a well adjusted liberal. 

His mother has serious health problems she won't get medical attention for because it insults god and she "speaks" to her illnesses. She has started to do the speaking in tongues thing and his sister who sadly has mental health issues that have lead to and been exasperated by drugs, doesn't need rehab/mental health help. Nope. She is demon possessed and needs to be taken to some big church someplace to get rid of the demons... I never thought they liked me much before we were dating but now that we are it is CLEAR they really don't like me even if they are surface level polite. 

They believe that my boyfriend shouldn't have his own life and because they "did so much for him" (by you know, raising him like people who decide to have children are kinda obligated to do) that he should basically do nothing but help them.

He was basically his mothers segregate husband his whole life and since he moved in with me she is really making things difficult. 

[Briefly]

@Paige1, I hope that your boyfriend realizes how poisonous they are, both to him and to you.  I do hope that his mother will realize that she needs help and will get it.  She's not insulting God.  I wonder if she would listen if someone were to tell her that God has given the medical abilities to the doctors?

I hope that things will be ok for everybody and that your boyfriend will stand up to her/them.

[Paige1]

Briefly. Thank you. He is aware but it is hard for him. People have told her the thing about god and doctors. The thing is her illness/disabilities have, in my opinion, become her whole identity.  She has been the victim for so long and she uses it to control those around her I think she wouldn't know what to do with herself if she was better. I also think she is afraid everyone would abandon her if she wasn't helpless. His sister had a child that they now have custody of (she is about a year and a half, was taken away at birth and they got her back). Even this has not motivated her to get help. This is all really the tip of the iceberg. There is A LOT going on with these guys. Including a ex boyfriend of the sister (not the babies dad) who lives with them and while he helps in some ways he is mostly a serious drag on the entire family but he started eating up the religious stuff and now he is "like a son" and they can't "turn their backs". They have my boyfriend stuck in some financial situations that are complicated too. Things they did when he was young and now conveniently are used to try to keep him inline. He has been working to untangle. 

Thank you all for listening BTW this is kinda of a rant, I know, but it really feels nice to say it to people who get it.

 

[EowynW]

Saw on Facebook my sister's fundie husband got a very nice expensive gift for his anniversary, said it was from her but since he's the sole wage earner I know he got it for himself. Supposedly money is tight for them too so I don't get that but oh well  

Anyways, I asked my sister what he got her, since after what he got she certainly deserved something really nice. Her answer? A few FREE nights for them in a hotel with his points he earned. What the fuck. I have never really liked him but now I despise him. 

[fundiefollower]

Here in North Dakota it is illegal for retail stores to sell anything before noon on Sundays.  Grocery stores and gas stations can be open 24/7 which is weird because grocery stores can sell retail item like clothing, cookware, greeting cards, stuffed animals, health and beauty items - you know how they have random seasonal items and stuff too.  But Walmart can't be open because they can't separate the retail sales from the grocery sales.  It's bizarre.  You can go to Cracker Barrel after church at 10 am  on Sunday and eat but you can't purchase anything from the country store side of the building until noon.  Until the late 1980's it was illegal for stores to be open at all on Sundays. 

Also, regarding alcohol, can't pick it up along with you dinner ingredients in a grocery store unless it is a grocery store that also has a liquor store.  Separate transactions, no kids in the liquor store area, etc.  Until about 15 years ago liquor stores had to be closed on Sundays, you could get beer at gas stations but that was it. 

[ViolaSebastian]

On 10/17/2018 at 8:31 PM, PumaLover said:

I have lived in California my entire adult life, and you can buy beer, wine and hard liquor at grocery stores. They even have a liquor aisle at CVS! 

Here in Kentucky, chains like CVS and Walgreens are allowed to sell beer, wine, and hard liquor, but the aisles containing them have metal doors that shut people out from accessing them on Sundays. 

We also have "dry" counties (no selling booze, anywhere, including restaurants), "wet" counties (sale of booze permitted within the Blue laws' specified time frame) and "moist" counties, wherein cities within the counties have voted to allow alcohol sales, but the county itself is dry. It's actually a huge problem, because people go the next county over, get hammered, and are more apt to drink and drive than if they were at the bar down the street and stumbled home.

[SoSoNosy]

On 10/18/2018 at 9:34 PM, Aine said:

I bet you don't live far from me  I'm in North Mississippi. Hearing stories about how it used to be here and in Memphis always makes me thankful that it isn't as restrictive as it once was. I only really 'register' the restrictions when friends from out of town come and stay and then what has been habitual to me for a long time seems so backward when I say it aloud. I've got used to the ones we have here but they also don't have any restrictions on anything but alcohol and sex toys.

I am in North Mississippi, too; moved 10 years ago.   I clearly remember the Blue Laws, because they were still in effect when I was in college in Memphis. 

When my daughter first went to college, she went to a school in Arkansas that was in a dry county.  She became a Little Sister to one of the fraternities; they had a soft drink dispenser with one row of "beer" (generic), so they had to make beer runs to the next county to get their beer.  As a teenager she always looked a little bit older than she was, so she made the beer run fairly often.  Arkansas still has a bunch of dry counties.

[Briefly]

8 hours ago, ViolaSebastian said:

Here in Kentucky, chains like CVS and Walgreens are allowed to sell beer, wine, and hard liquor, but the aisles containing them have metal doors that shut people out from accessing them on Sundays. 

We also have "dry" counties (no selling booze, anywhere, including restaurants), "wet" counties (sale of booze permitted within the Blue laws' specified time frame) and "moist" counties, wherein cities within the counties have voted to allow alcohol sales, but the county itself is dry. It's actually a huge problem, because people go the next county over, get hammered, and are more apt to drink and drive than if they were at the bar down the street and stumbled home.

I had to laugh at the idea of "moist" counties!  But yes, it could be a serious issue with drinking and driving home.

[AliceInFundyland]

When I turned 21 it was in Iowa (liquor in grocery stores). Not only that, but tiny ass town - so rite of passage to hit the grocery store for college kids. My first legal alcohol purchase was almost $200 dollars. I was the first person to come of age on my dorm floor.  That was fun.

[smittykins]

NY raised the drinking age from 18 to 19 in 1982, and to 21 in 1986.  I turned 19 that September and the age raise was due to take effect on December 1st.  So I was legal twice(we weren't grandfathered in, unfortunately).

[WhatWouldJohnCrichtonDo?]

6 hours ago, smittykins said:

So I was legal twice(we weren't grandfathered in, unfortunately).

My sister turned 19 before the age limit was raised to 21 here, but she, and all the other people her age, were grandfathered in. It's always interesting the different ways things are done in different places.

My sister took me for lunch and my first legal drink right after I turned 21. The only reason the waitress asked for my ID was because my sister told her to, as kind of marking the moment and teasing me a little. I hope servers are better about carding these days!