Dillards 31: Grifting, Lying, and Allergies

[MadeItOut]

I still envy a woman I used to know who was wallpapering her sitting room one Saturday afternoon, felt a little dizzy, so climbed down the stepladder and birthed a 4lb6oz but perfect full term girl. This was the first she knew she was pregnant. - There is karmic justice though, it was her third child and she far outdid the others for energy, curiosity etc...

[ClaraOswin]

No prenatal care and a tiny baby? Not something I'd envy. Sounds a bit scary to me.

[Darwinesque]

There is a lot that I like about the US but your health care seems f'd-up to me. For such a developed, wealthy country it feels like the population is being let down. 

I've used the health care over there with a sick child whilst on holiday, so I have experienced it. First question is insurance, paperwork?  What about the sick child? It just seems so impersonal. My same child was rushed to A and E here in the UK not that long ago and was seen to immediately with care and compassion, and we walked out of the hospital after an emergency operation not a penny lighter and with no request for paperwork or identification. It's just done and you leave. It's paid for out of our taxes and I would happily pay more if it meant preserving the NHS. Our hospitals might not look the best, the paintwork is tired, and the food pretty terrible, but the main part, the actual medical attention, has been second to none for me ( 2 emergency c-sections).

I also really appreciate our pre-natal care. Appointments are with midwives and if needed you can be referred to an obstetrician, but for a healthy pregnancy you can go the whole time without having seen a doctor. After-care is also fantastic, midwife visits at home for the first week to to two weeks and then on to a health visitor who you can go to for advice until your child reaches school age. Once at school you have the school nurse or GP. I've known of a few friends who have had home births, all after a successful hospital birth first time, and attended by NHS midwives.

My daughter and I love the programme "One Born Every Minute". It's a fly on the wall documentary set in the birthing units of NHS hospitals. It's very "real" and I highly recommend if anyone wants an insight into free at point of use maternity care in the UK.

I hope this doesn't sound like too much of a put down of the USA, there's plenty you do better than us, but I wouldn't swap the NHS for anything.

[nastyhobbitses]

21 minutes ago, Darwinesque said:

I hope this doesn't sound like too much of a put down of the USA, there's plenty you do better than us, but I wouldn't swap the NHS for anything.

Nah, put us the hell down. I was in the UK for grad school and was so amazed at the NHS (you mean that this appointment to treat an infection, plus the drugs to kill the nasty bugs in my ear piercing, is £8 TOTAL? Whaaaaaaaaat); if I can get the job and visa gods to smile upon me, I might be moving back, partially (mostly) for NHS, partially because you guys might get rid of Theresa May soon because of how much of a screwup she is (but even if you don't, she's better than Trump, but then again, a half-eaten ham sandwich could run a country better than he can), and partially because I am in a Godly Courtship with a Special Friend in London. You guys do most things better than we do. We've been a dumpster fire of a country since we kicked you out.

[HarryPotterFan]

Maybe if we ask really nicely the queen will take us back. We can bribe her with corgis.

[Italiangirl]

You know that it was the Whels miner the one who founded the first kind of National Healt Sistem? Basically everyone pay when they was healthy, so when they was si ci they didn't have to and can use that money for living and medicine. 

So basically the Europe Healt Sistem has to thank you some of the poorest worker for his function. 

 

[Darwinesque]

4 minutes ago, nastyhobbitses said:

 I am in a Godly Courtship with a Special Friend in London. 

Ahh, London. I also entered into a Godly courtship in London and have the most amazing memories of those times, even after 20 years  with my Mr London. For both of us, our dating days there were definitely the most exciting years of our lives, it was just so much fun.

I hope it all works out for you.

[Nikedagain?]

4 hours ago, Million Children For Jesus said:

My kids want all the babies born on their birthdays, so they can have a birthday twin. 

Yeah well, my ex MIL was my birthday twin. It wasn't that great....

[VelociRapture]

5 hours ago, Henk12 said:

You had your baby at 33 or 34 weeks, right? I know you mentioned it before but I've got mom brain so I can't remember. Either way, if you had been planning a home birth and then gone into labor before 35 weeks then you would have had to transfer to a hospital. The home birth midwives in my area won't attend births before 35 weeks because of situations like your daughter's. So I understand that a home birth would not have been a good choice for you but home birth is very safe with a real midwife because they plan for emergencies like yours.

Yes, 34 weeks. And I'm sure a legitimate Midwife would have absolutely transferred under those circumstances. 

@Million Children For JesusYes, I was referring to my daughter's birth specifically (I thought I made that clear, but I guess not. Sorry about that!) I had always planned on a hospital birth, but I would have been stupid if I had demanded to give birth outside a hospital given the circumstances (especially given the breathing issues and the fact that the cord had to be cut early because it was wrapped around her neck.)

A woman with a full-term pregnancy with no prior complications or risk factors is absolutely free to choose any birth she feels is best for her. I'd just hope they'd have a plan in place in case they do need to be transferred and that they're flexible enough with their birth plan to do whats safest (and I'm sure a good Midwife would make sure that happens.) And I would hope she wouldn't need the backup plan and she would be able to experience the birth she hoped for. Any woman in the same situation I was in who insisted on a home birth is an absolute moron though. I think most of us likely agree on that.

[VeryNikeSeamstress]

The fact that they've already revealed Dullard the second's name feels anticlimactic to me. It gives us so much less to snark about.

[MadeItOut]

4 hours ago, ClaraOswin said:

No prenatal care and a tiny baby? Not something I'd envy. Sounds a bit scary to me.

Perfect, full term baby. 

Does seem a pretty sweet deal from where I'm stood: Para 14 inc two twin pregnancies, grav 3 - all of whom premie, total roughly one week in active labour.  ...plus, she was the most wonderful little child - so adventurous and creative.

4 hours ago, HarryPotterFan said:

Maybe if we ask really nicely the queen will take us back. We can bribe her with corgis.

Her Maj has said she won't have any more. She's supposedly very fond of cake though.

[Fluffy14]

6 hours ago, Darwinesque said:

My daughter and I love the programme "One Born Every Minute". It's a fly on the wall documentary set in the birthing units of NHS hospitals. It's very "real" and I highly recommend if anyone wants an insight into free at point of use maternity care in the UK.

I have watched that show too and LOVED it. I can't remember for sure, is this the one where they go to the homes and keep track of young teen mums? I watch so many documentaries it's hard to keep track.  The history of midwives in the uk is amazing. I also love Call the Midwives. 

I read recently that USA has the highest mortality rate in the western world.  Pretty sad considering such highly qualified and advanced  medical technology.

[just_ordinary]

7 hours ago, HarryPotterFan said:

Maybe if we ask really nicely the queen will take us back. We can bribe her with corgis.

Reminds me of the joke: Make American Great - Britain again.

I always enjoy the queen_uk twitter account. Very snarky!!!

[WhatWouldJohnCrichtonDo?]

37 minutes ago, just_ordinary said:

Reminds me of the joke: Make American Great - Britain again.

Just for you!

Spoiler

I cropped it from a picture of a t-shirt. 

 

[JillyO]

The fucked up health care system is the main reason I am terrified of moving to the US (from Germany) in October. Seriously terrified.

[season of life]

I follow a man on Twitter who is moving to the U.K. around September. The plan is for his wife to move first and then he will come over. I believe he has dual citizenship through his mother. I can't remember the exact details.

Moving to another country sounds terrifying to me. What if you can't find work? How does transportation work? I can't even make grilled cheese.

[bella8050]

I am happy to be an American for many reasons, but our healthcare system is not one of them.  I am lucky and grateful to have good by US standards insurance, but damn it is getting harder every year. I have a number of medical issues and until the last few years used to hit the max out of pocket limit of $9,000 a year by October or November giving me a little bit of a break and would plan doctor visits around that knowing the insurance would cover everything. They've now raises it to $14,000 and raised co pays as well. 

I was wondering, does NHS cover emergency transports? I have had to be taken to the hospital by ambulance a few times and that was a seperate $400+ bill. A few years ago I sliced open my thumb trying to put together my Ninja blender, on my dominant hand, and ended up driving myself to the hospital to avoid the ambulance cost. It was after midnight (major night owl here) and I didn't want to call and disturb the anyone that lived close enough to drive me. It's quite comical to me now, especially given how squeamish I am over blood normally. I just wrapped my finger and drove with my left hand with my right up over my head.  Going back to insurance, I will never fully understand our system. This incident happened in January so I figured I was going to get screwed over big time because no deductibles had been reached. For whatever reason my insurance ended up paying the full ER visit that totaled over $1,000. I did have to pay the seperate doctors fee of a little over $100 but I didn't mind feeling I dodged a bullet with the ER charges. 

I never used the attachment on the blender that cut my finger. That's what I got for having a new years resolution to be healthier and make smoothies and shit. When I told that to the doctor he replied "yep this wouldn't have happened if you went to McDonalds". Not gonna lie that still pops into my head as a justification when I get a fast food craving. 

 

[Dugg@rTime]

Bella, the NHS does cover emergency transfers in emergent cases, but if you call an ambulance and it's not a proper emergency, eg you're in labour but could easily get to hospital yourself say by taxi then there's a chance you'll be given a bill.

A woman in the same ward as me when I had my first son had rung for an ambulance while in early labour and had been told to expect a bill as it wasn't a proper emergency. I have no idea how much or whether she did pay but it was 25 years ago and NHS funds are tighter than ever so I hope they are billing for misuse of resources nowadays.

[Darwinesque]

1 hour ago, bella8050 said:

 

I was wondering, does NHS cover emergency transports? I have had to be taken to the hospital by ambulance a few times and that was a seperate $400+ bill. A few years ago I sliced open my thumb trying to put together my Ninja blender, on my dominant hand, and ended up driving myself to the hospital to avoid the ambulance cost. It was after midnight (major night owl here) and I didn't want to call and disturb the anyone that lived close enough to drive me. It's quite comical to me now, especially given how squeamish I am over blood normally. I just wrapped my finger and drove with my left hand with my right up over my head.  Going back to insurance, I will never fully understand our system. This incident happened in January so I figured I was going to get screwed over big time because no deductibles had been reached. For whatever reason my insurance ended up paying the full ER visit that totaled over $1,000. I did have to pay the seperate doctors fee of a little over $100 but I didn't mind feeling I dodged a bullet with the ER charges. 

 

 

Absolutely. The ambulance service is part of the NHS - you call and they come in most cases. I have a 97 year old Grandmother who requires medical treatment and not only do they take her to hospital and treat her, they also take her back to her nursing home. Not in an ambulance, but in a community transport bus.

 

We do have 2 numbers to call if there is a medical problem. 999 for true emergencies and 111 if you have a medical concern that you don't think is serious enough to call an ambulance but want your mind put at rest. With your finger incident, I would have called 111 and they would have advised whether an ambulance was necessary.

 

 

[MadeItOut]

3 hours ago, season of life said:

 

Moving to another country sounds terrifying to me. What if you can't find work? How does transportation work? I can't even make grilled cheese.

US to UK there's also driving on the other side and electronics are a totally different system. Plus, many US zoned DVDs etc won't work.

 

I moved internationally in a little under a month in the end once I found a house. People think because they're geographically close it was nbd, but there's still culture shock & stuff even now.

[SapphireSlytherin]

40 minutes ago, MadeItOut said:

Moving to another country sounds terrifying to me.

It's not terrifying - it's AWESOME! You learn so much about yourself, others, new cultures, etc. Yep, electronics are different, but it's no big deal. My main gripe about the UK is their plumbing - so many places don't have mixer taps on the sinks. I know. That's truly a FWP.

I lived in Germany for almost two years, plus we spend an awful lot of time in the UK these days. Our ultimate goal is to go back to the UK permanently since DH is a Brit. However, Theresa May's shitty immigration rules mean it would take us about 6 months of living apart (him there/me here), plus having a certain amount of £'s in the bank, plus a place to live, plus his having a job making a certain amount of £ per year.

Immigrating into the UK is extremely difficult. 

[nastyhobbitses]

46 minutes ago, SapphireSlytherin said:

Immigrating into the UK is extremely difficult. 

Yup. I'm looking into moving back (got my MA there, moved back to the US after I finished because dead grandpa and most jobs I wanted wanted you to have a work visa or residency), and my options right now are to hope and pray that a job will sponsor me, or apply to a PhD program and get another student visa. Or to give up and stay in the States.

[moriah]

11 hours ago, VelociRapture said:

A woman with a full-term pregnancy with no prior complications or risk factors is absolutely free to choose any birth she feels is best for her. I'd just hope they'd have a plan in place in case they do need to be transferred and that they're flexible enough with their birth plan to do whats safest (and I'm sure a good Midwife would make sure that happens.) And I would hope she wouldn't need the backup plan and she would be able to experience the birth she hoped for. 

Lay midwives, even the best of them, are trained to deal with normal deliveries.  

What scares me is if the outside people doing the three wellness checks demanded are using county health unit personnel for such prenatal care, those medical personnel might not be using regular ultrasound to look for signs that demand a transvaginal doppler.  They're in a HUGE hurry anytime I've used their services.

I know a missed vasa previa would probably cause any midwife to rethink their profession.  Here's what usually happens -- the water breaks, there's sudden bleeding but people don't realize it's fetal blood until fetal brachycardia and/or an exanguinated stillborn infant is born.  That would be traumatic enough I think to make any lay midwife would blame themselves.   But, in fairness, it would be the fault of the prenatal care providers capable of doing an ultrasound not taking the time to visualize the placenta and umbilical cord, and therefore detect the signs that demand a specialized doppler.  

Vasa previa is very dangerous because of how fast the baby can bleed out,  But cord accidents one of the most common birth complications. It's an area of labor and delivery that people overlook. They routinely can extract a vertex-position baby from one loop around the neck before delivery of the shoulders, but that little cord is life for a baby.  With so many things that can go wrong, I'm surprised they haven't studied cord accident prevention more.

[Iamtheway]

13 hours ago, VeryNikeSeamstress said:

The fact that they've already revealed Dullard the second's name feels anticlimactic to me. It gives us so much less to snark about.

Do you think that's why they did it? Maybe they don't want us to write all the good names they've been saving up?

I've never heard of anyone giving birth at home in Sweden (except for when they didn't make it to the hospital). And even if it was an option it would not have been an option for me. We chose the hospital we did in part because it was the one where the delivery rooms were closest to the emergancy room in case something went wrong. My mum had an emergancy c-section with me and was told I probably wouldn't have lived if she had given birth in a less modern hospital. We fought hard to have our baby and I wouldn't risk it for anything. Also, I'm not cleaning that mess up.

We didn't pay a thing for my 53 hour delivery, the epidural (given by a man I wanted to name the baby after) and the two days we spent in hospital after the birth. 

I  paying tax. 

[bella8050]

7 hours ago, Darwinesque said:

Absolutely. The ambulance service is part of the NHS - you call and they come in most cases. I have a 97 year old Grandmother who requires medical treatment and not only do they take her to hospital and treat her, they also take her back to her nursing home. Not in an ambulance, but in a community transport bus.

 

We do have 2 numbers to call if there is a medical problem. 999 for true emergencies and 111 if you have a medical concern that you don't think is serious enough to call an ambulance but want your mind put at rest. With your finger incident, I would have called 111 and they would have advised whether an ambulance was necessary.

 

 

That's really nice that they take your grandmother home! 

For here if you call 911 about a medical issue many times the police are first to show up and then ambulance where an EMT will take your vital signs and then give you the choice to go with them or not. At least in the times I have encountered. That part luckily is no cost.