Lori Alexander 20: Evil and Hateful as Ever

[Hisey]

44 minutes ago, delphinium65 said:

When Aunt Lori says 'This is why I hate birth control. It “allows” couples to decide how many children they want...' why does she put quotation marks around the word 'allows'?  It definitely DOES allow a couple to make those decisions. 

Because the quotes shows you that you shouldn't be allowed such a thing! It looks too legit and reasonable without the quotes. Watch:

Quote

This is why I hate birth control. It allows couples to decide how many children they want. . .

See? This sentence makes Lori look a bit weird. You'd read this and say, "What's wrong with that? What's her point?" Here's another example:

Quote

This is why I hate restaurants. They allow people to choose their own food.

You're like. .. .what? So what? What's bad about that? In contrast, quotes can be used to show others what's bad:

Quote

This is why I hate restaurants. They allow people to "choose their own food."

Thanks to the quotes, you now know that choosing your own food is bad. (Lori should choose it, and she chooses for you to eat a big salad).

For a stupid person, Lori manipulates language well. Like in cases of physical abuse. She never says "Call the police." That makes it seem too serious, and almost like the poor husband has done something wrong! Almost like she's showing empathy to the probably-unsubmissive victim. She distances herself by saying, "Call the authorities."

I saw Kelly Crawford put "rape" in quotes once. I think that says it all.

[Red Jumper]

@jadis87 her eldest is Alyssa.

@quiversR4hunting Recently I left the apartment right after posting something on FJ, turned on the radio and heard the following lyrics ( translated without the rhyming):

Quote

Every time you go out, you could paint yourself a new face,
even when you are feeling like hell smiling up to the ears.

but you don't do that

For the first time i was thinking about the forced smile of fundies. The song goes on about
 

Quote

You could think a dude with a beard sits up there on a cloud, and the government injects neurotoxin into our clouds

...

Quote

You could talk,talk, talk and tell yourself anything, never think yourself, always only ask the others

At the refrain
 

Quote

You make it easy for me. I love you just, really just - oh - the way you are, the way you are.

I though that this is absolute the opposite of all this headship - submissiveness - talk

(when i wrote this post i let the video play on youtube. then i saw that at the bearded-god-line they showed an old man selling the booklets of the Jehovah’s Witnesses)
It's a pop song so probably not your style, but not leave it out: it's call "So wie du bist" (=just like you are) from "LEMO"

ETA: @quiversR4hunting How about Blake Shelton "Doin' what she like" for you? I like the video and the "she likes it when i get past 2nd gear" hits home. but I only started to explore this very unknown world of country

[EowynW]

Her healthy chocolate sounds like what I make. Simply coconut oil, coco powder, sweetener and nuts or vanilla, etc. not earthshattering. I use it as a way to get some healthy fat in and keep it on hand for period chocolate cravings so I don't eat a bag of stuff I shouldn't. 

[Koala]

On 5/30/2017 at 2:46 AM, Joyce said:

Lori sent me a message on Facebook:

Quote

Hi Joy, I am not going to publish any more of your comments on my blog, Instagram, or Facebook anymore because I sense your contention with what I teach. Then you post it in the chat room. It seems like you are always trying to undermine what I teach. I am a teaching blog, not an arguing or up for discussion blog. If you have a simple question, that is different but I don't want to be undermined by you anymore. I am tired of it. Thank yo

 

The more I think about it, the more I think that Lori's "ministry" is beginning to have a cultish vibe to it.  

-Lori is above question- readers must agree with her(see: chat room application), and blindly accept what she says.  

-Anyone who dares question Lori, is silenced via deleting/blocking.  

-Discussion is strongly discouraged, and is viewed as "undermining" she who is not to be questioned.

-Adults are "monitored" by Lori, who devotes a VERY large portion of her day to making sure that other women/men don't say anything that she disagrees with (or worse, contradicts something she's said).

-Random rules that have no basis in the Bible.  Rules apply to everyone....except Lori.

Even the tone of the questions have changed.  I see a lot of "is it okay if I.....".  
Why are they asking Lori?  Kind of like the woman who said her husband didn't like the way she was disciplining their daughter, so instead of telling her to submit (which actually matches Lori's "message"), she told her to treat her one way in front of him, and another while he's at work.  

Lori seems to get a thrill from controlling her readers.  That's why she is encouraging a women to go against their doctor's advice and have more children.   She even went as far as to hint that if they "trust God" it'll be okay.

Lori:

Quote

 I have been reading the Above Rubies Magazine for many years and there’s countless stories of women who were told by their doctors to not have any more children but they did and they were fine because they trusted God.

 

[Joyce]

@Koala, monitoring and deleting comments on her blog, Facebook chatroom, and Instagram site must take up hours of Lori's time each day.

She reminds me of some authoritarian states that censor internet content: North Korea, Burma, Cuba, Saudi Arabia, Iran, China, and Syria.

[quiversR4hunting]

1 hour ago, dairyfreelife said:

A sedentary woman her age still needs at least 1600 calories to maintain while moderately active women her age need minimum 1800 and very active women need 2200. This is for all women age 50-60. <snipped to focus in on this>

Maybe you are nutritionist or doctor/pa, etc but many calculators do not agree with above. I am neither so I have relied on a couple calculators to give me a ball park of calories needed for myself to loose 10-15 lbs of my 3 babies weight*.  Here is a calorie calculator out on the net: http://www.calculator.net/calorie-calculator.html

I put in age 60, female, height 5'5" (anyone know Lori's height?) and I put in 125lbs and activity as sedentary. It says 1365 to maintain the weight. If I change the age to 40 it says 1485 to maintain.

To compare, I am shorter, younger and heavier than what I put in for Lori and I exercise (I put in moderate activity) I have to eat 1911 calories to maintain. (when I say heavier, I am now not over the recommended weight for my height.)

*side note: I did this when I was running and not loosing weight and frustrated! I found a calculator put in my data and found out that I was eating way too many calories so I slightly adjusted my calorie intake and that is how I lost 8lbs in a year. Yeah, not a ton of weight nor super fast but I wasn't worried about all that, I just wanted to feel better about myself so loosing slowly and still having sweets or fried food sometimes was fine with me.

[delphinium65]

42 minutes ago, Hisey said:

Because the quotes shows you that you shouldn't be allowed such a thing! It looks too legit and reasonable without the quotes.

Good point. I was thinking more like Lori saying 'you think BC 'allows' you to control your family size? Ha! You just think it does!'  She seemed to me to be making a stab at the efficacy of birth control, and I wondered if she really is that ignorant.  

[Red Jumper]

She knows BC is working. She destroyed hers.

 

[delphinium65]

11 minutes ago, Red Jumper said:

She knows BC is working. She destroyed hers.

 

That's what I figured, but Aunt Lori does seem to be pretty good at cognitive dissonance. 

[Koala]

The birth control sabotage was another "this is who Lori really is" moment.  It's not even like she just stopped taking it.  She actually had to go through a very deceptive process, in which there were many points that she could have turned back and done the right thing.  A normal person would have been wracked with guilt for even considering such a thing.

At some point she walked into a room, picked up her diaphragm, and destroyed it (smugly thinking, "This'll fix him.  Now I'll get my way!").  

How she was able to look at Ken, knowing she was tricking him into conceiving a child with her---I can't even fathom.  I also wonder at what point she told him what she'd done, and how he reacted.  What she did to him was practically criminal.

The whole thing requires a level of calculation that is just mind boggling.  She truly believes that if she wants something , she should get it at all costs to those around her.

 

[polecat]

From the comments today: 
 

Quote

For example, if I wanted to teach my husband how to swim this summer, or teach my father in law to make my recipe for salsa? That’s definitely teaching men, but I’m not sure if it’s off limits or if it’s ok since it’s not teaching Scripture.

Oh my holy heck. 

By all means, let's not teach males anything. Anything at all. I have three sons, and I'm-a just going to sit back and let my husband teach them errrrything. Because I am a poor, lowly little vagina-haver and could not POSSIBLY usurp authority over a penis-owner. Nope, nope, nope. So it's all on him! 

Sorry, Mr. Polecat, the little skunks are all yours! Enjoy! 

I'm going to sit over here and nurse my coffee. Have fun! 

Flipping lunatics.

 

[dairyfreelife]

1 hour ago, quiversR4hunting said:

Maybe you are nutritionist or doctor/pa, etc but many calculators do not agree with above. I am neither so I have relied on a couple calculators to give me a ball park of calories needed for myself to loose 10-15 lbs of my 3 babies weight*.  Here is a calorie calculator out on the net: http://www.calculator.net/calorie-calculator.html

I put in age 60, female, height 5'5" (anyone know Lori's height?) and I put in 125lbs and activity as sedentary. It says 1365 to maintain the weight. If I change the age to 40 it says 1485 to maintain.

To compare, I am shorter, younger and heavier than what I put in for Lori and I exercise (I put in moderate activity) I have to eat 1911 calories to maintain. (when I say heavier, I am now not over the recommended weight for my height.)

*side note: I did this when I was running and not loosing weight and frustrated! I found a calculator put in my data and found out that I was eating way too many calories so I slightly adjusted my calorie intake and that is how I lost 8lbs in a year. Yeah, not a ton of weight nor super fast but I wasn't worried about all that, I just wanted to feel better about myself so loosing slowly and still having sweets or fried food sometimes was fine with me.

I didn't use a calculator, I used this https://health.gov/dietaryguidelines/2015/guidelines/appendix-2/

It's from the USDA. 

[quiversR4hunting]

1 minute ago, dairyfreelife said:

I didn't use a calculator, I used this https://health.gov/dietaryguidelines/2015/guidelines/appendix-2/

It's from the USDA. 

Thanks for the source & clarifying, that is helpful on why things are a bit off between the 2 sources.

No matter if we all use the USDA or the calculator Lori does not have a well balanced diet.

[polecat]

16 hours ago, Joyce said:

Up until January before hormone replacement, my hormones were extremely low, in fact almost life-threatening low because my pituitary was dying. My Naturopath even said some were lower than she'd ever seen yet I had no problems with depression at all.

With all due respect (iow, none at all), Lori, you have symptoms of depression whether you want to admit it or not. Depression includes not just persistent sadness but also angry outbursts, irritability, social isolation, tiredness, lack of energy, weight loss, poor appetite, repeatedly going over the same thoughts or ideas, fixation on past failures, trouble thinking, unexplained health problems, etc.

I'm no doctor, but ... I'd suggest seeing one, if I were you.

http://www.mayoclinic.org/diseases-conditions/depression/basics/symptoms/con-20032977

 

[Imrlgoddess]

I'm not sure why she'd say older women need fewer calories?  I can understand a change in nutritional value, different vitamins, that kind of thing...but why calories?  Whether you weigh 100 lbs at 20 or 60 I'd think you'd need to maintain your intake to maintain your weight.  Usually I can reach waaaayyyy out there and kind of grasp what she's trying to say but this one just flew straight over my head.  

I take the majority of her "this is my method" crap as her way of one upping everyone.  It will never matter how good another person does something, she will always do it better.  You got a cold?  She got the flu.  You run marathons, eat steak and could bench press a Buick?  She eats expensive organic, rests, and has her man bench press whatever it is men do that...thing...to (I'm too Godly/ladylike to care).  

[polecat]

13 minutes ago, Imrlgoddess said:

I'm not sure why she'd say older women need fewer calories?  I can understand a change in nutritional value, different vitamins, that kind of thing...but why calories?  Whether you weigh 100 lbs at 20 or 60 I'd think you'd need to maintain your intake to maintain your weight.  Usually I can reach waaaayyyy out there and kind of grasp what she's trying to say but this one just flew straight over my head.  

Older people -- not just women but men, too -- tend to lose muscle mass over time, so their metabolisms become slower and use fewer overall calories. Hence, they need fewer calories as they age. Now, someone who is really active and compensates for the reduced muscle mass with more activity/weight lifting/etc. might be able to eat the same amount, but most of us will need to reduce calorie intake as we age. 

 

[Imrlgoddess]

@polecat Thank you!  That makes sense!  The way she just throws things out there it's confusing as to which ones hold water and which don't so I often take her quips with a grain of salt.  

[HoneyBunny]

2 hours ago, Koala said:

Lori seems to get a thrill from controlling her readers.  

Of course she does. She is a former bossy older sister, former bossy mother to terrified young kids and a former bossy wife to a husband who threatened to leave her. She hasn't changed. She hasn't been transformed.  She has simply directed her bossiness onto a whole new audience, mis-using the Bible to maintain control. 

She's really quite vile. 

[Koala]

She posted a video with a breakdown of what she eats in a day.

Basically:

Breakfast: Oatmeal or yogurt with fruit 

Lunch: 4 day old salad with beef/chicken/or fish on top

Snack: 4 (why 4???) chips (she said that in yesterday's video) / piece of choc.

Dinner: Soup

What strikes me as odd, is that it seems like most days she doesn't cook anything at all.  The salad lasts for 4 days, and lord only knows how long she lets that soup sit in the fridge.  

She seems to be opposed to any variety, which I have a hard time believing is something that Ken enjoys.  

There are other healthy meals that she could be making, but I honestly get the impression that she's too busy "monitoring" the internet to bother.

Whatever...just very boring, and I will literally laugh myself out of my chair the next time she complains about women who don't cook.

@HoneyBunny- I agree, and I think she uses the blog to take jabs at her family.  When they do something The Godly Mentor doesn't like, a post (or 3) on that very subject magically appear on her blog.  

She doesn't waste an opportunity to express her disapproval.

Yesterday Ken responded to one of her readers and she deleted both of their comments!  But you know Ken, he's a real command man 

[Imrlgoddess]

Well.  That's how her kitchen stays so spotless!  If you don't use it, it doesn't get dirty.  

She strikes me as what would be coined: "skinny-fat".  Someone who's thin but doesn't carry much useful muscle and usually has a minimal diet.  She never talks about going for walks or any real physical activity besides when the grandkids come over and they're such raging hand fulls. Yes she's probably a size 6 or so on what looks to be a decently tall frame, but she's not toned at all, very little muscle mass.  I'm not exactly an Olympic power lifter, but I can pick up a 35 lb box of kitty litter and carry it from room to room.  I highly doubt she could do the same.

I'm willing to bet if it doesn't get the best of her now, it did in the past.  The body needs that variety, that's why we have weird cravings that are only satisfied by some random thing.  You can be the healthiest eater on the planet and still run for a Reese's cup or some mozzarella sticks once in a blue moon.  

[polecat]

14 minutes ago, Koala said:

She posted a video with a breakdown of what she eats in a day.

Basically:

Breakfast: Oatmeal or yogurt with fruit 

Lunch: 4 day old salad with beef/chicken/or fish on top

Snack: 4 (why 4???) chips (she said that in yesterday's video) / piece of choc.

Dinner: Soup

What strikes me as odd, is that it seems like most days she doesn't cook anything at all.  The salad lasts for 4 days, and lord only knows how long she lets that soup sit in the fridge.  

Eating the same thing every day is a really good way to make sure you don't slip up and eat too much or go over your allotted calories for that day. The boredom of eating the same bland foods can also keep you from eating more than you want to eat. If she really does eat the same thing day after day, it may well be because those are her "safe" foods. 

Signed,
Someone who struggles with disordered eating patterns from time to time but who is going to stop short of Internet diagnosing someone else

[Red Hair, Black Dress]

XXXX Reader responded on the blog that you can only teach your husband (or any man) something if he asks you to. But.. you have to "respectfully instruct and encourage him",

If you push it on him, them you are being in authority over him -- an "inappropriate exercise of authority".

So to the reader asking about teaching her husband to swim, I say let the idiot drown if he's too stupid/ prideful/ patriarchal/ etc.to ask.

Here something that puzzles me about fundies and the no teaching men thing:  At what age does a woman stop being able to teach her male child?  5?, 6?, 12?  Or is she never to teach her sons because that puts her into authority over a "man".  But then how does this square up with the fundie mandate of homeschooling?  Isn't the SAHM supposed to teach the children?

Edited to add:    There is a video she made where she comments that Ken has just appeared in the kitchen to make his own breakfast. Ken has also admitted on FJ  he made his own dinner for years and the kids wanted his food.  I bet he's cooking himself a steak to go with that "big salad" and the "yummy" 3-week old raw egg yolk dressing

Edited to add 2:     I believe the root of LoriKen's 23+ years of fighting was her 1) insistence on not working ever and then 2) ratching up #1 by sabotaging her bc, as Ken had insisted she teach school for awhile.  

I also believe that Lori shamed Ken into quitting divinity school because he wasn't making enough money and never would as a minister.  I'm sure she told him that if he couldn't make enough money to keep her, then her father the rich doctor would do it.

Lori is the lazy, selfish, bullying, controlling bitch that she is at 58 because her parents let her get away with that behavior growing up. No one stopped her when she bullied her sisters and everyone must have given into her wants. because Lori herself says she always gets what she wants and always has.

Her mother might have been a wonderful SAHM with a bright and cheerful home, but she also raised Lori to be the woman she is today. If Lori is a monster (and she is) then that's on her parents.

[Chocolatedefrauded]

She is sounding food restrictive or food avoidant, which is a newly classified mental illness. Also known as selective eating disorder. Very rigid rules for eating.

[EowynW]

Your husband should never feel that you will not step up to help him, even if being a SAHM is your preference. My husband sincerely desires me to stay home part time since he knows my health is weaker right now and he wants to shoulder the main part of the burden. But he told me just knowing that should the need arise, I will jump up and cheerfully hop to full time in a heartbeat just eases such a load off of him mentally. He knows I'm his partner and teammate in every area possible. 

[Howl]

So Lori is nearing or is in menopause.  Once she can no longer have children, shouldn't Ken replace her with a fertile wife so his sperms don't go to waste?   Think of the CHILDREN, Lori!