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Adoptive "Mothers" 3: Women Who Don't Deserve Mother's Day


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On 12/19/2017 at 8:43 AM, littlemommy said:

It says a lot that other people can’t forget about Avery as easily as Vicky appears to want to. 

Vicky and the girls attend the same church we do.  I only ever see 4 girls with her.  I'm guessing Avery has been sent off again.

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5 minutes ago, lrigau said:

Vicky and the girls attend the same church we do.  I only ever see 4 girls with her.  I'm guessing Avery has been sent off again.

Oh man. Poor Avery. Not necessarily for getting away from Vicki, but for what Vicki has done to her life and self esteem, no matter how well intentioned it all started.

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5 minutes ago, littlemommy said:

Oh man. Poor Avery. Not necessarily for getting away from Vicki, but for what Vicki has done to her life and self esteem, no matter how well intentioned it all started.

I feel bad for Avery, no matter where she has ended up.  I hope it's somewhere she can be loved and given the chance she deserves.  

The other girls seem like normal, sweet teenagers.  

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Vicky has sent Avery away twice now. After the first time, she said she would never do it again. But, Avery did not fill Vickys bucket so she sent her away again. If I try was simply keeping her off the blog for Averys privacy than she would simply say so. She is hiding the truth about what happened to Avery. I pray for Avery. I hope she finds the stability and love all children deserve. 

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  • 2 weeks later...

I have a general thought for y'all.   I remember that it was noted one thread that one girl had quite an attachment to her caregiver in China before she was adopted in the US.  Many months later the thought popped into my head that perhaps in some instances, children were removed from an orphanage where they DID have a strong attachment to a caregiver and/or their fellow orphans and part of their problems adjusting to a new situation (new country, new language, new family) stems from the loss of their primary caregiver and other bonded relationships, and NOT because they never had that bond.  Thoughts?

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7 hours ago, Howl said:

I have a general thought for y'all.   I remember that it was noted one thread that one girl had quite an attachment to her caregiver in China before she was adopted in the US.  Many months later the thought popped into my head that perhaps in some instances, children were removed from an orphanage where they DID have a strong attachment to a caregiver and/or their fellow orphans and part of their problems adjusting to a new situation (new country, new language, new family) stems from the loss of their primary caregiver and other bonded relationships, and NOT because they never had that bond.  Thoughts?

Correct. Some adoptees who were in orphanages are upset they were adopted. They wanted to stay because that was their culture. They connected and bonded. 

 

 

RAD(Reactive attachment disorder) means no attachment. It' rare. Imagine if you were taken to a forgein country not knowing the language, people, food, customs. 

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  • 4 weeks later...

The first time Kimi mentions kicking Sissy out when she turns 18 is well... when she was still in China, during the adoption trip.

The self-titled super mom says "I saw the next four years as something to be struggled through with a kick out the door on her 18th birthday."

http://fencingmama.blogspot.co.uk/2012/07/finally-had-breakthrough.html

She brought her to America anyway and went on to adopt two more girls.

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8 hours ago, Edhelfin said:

The self-titled super mom says "I saw the next four years as something to be struggled through with a kick out the door on her 18th birthday."

http://fencingmama.blogspot.co.uk/2012/07/finally-had-breakthrough.html

She brought her to America anyway and went on to adopt two more girls.

Oh, my. I read that post and some other ones from that time (when Sissy was new), and wow. Just wow.

Kimmi, you are cordially invited to go get fucked.

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I hadn't read that blogpost by Kimmie. She really shows how little she understands of adoption in general and in particular of kids who have grown up in institutions. It is expected that they might not understand everything about living in a regular family. Knowing what a hotel is shouldn't be expected even if she was from a fosterfamily, if they had never had the means to go on a holiday which involved staying in a hotel the existence of such establishments might have been unknown or something she only had a dim idea about. Having less knowledge of proper interactions with people is also very much expected for a child in her situation. 

I once remember reading about an occurrence in a family with an older adopted child who the first time he got into the family car said: "What kind of bus is this?" When the family explained that it was a car he immediately understood what they meant but since he had never been in a car before he didn't recognize the inside of a car as a car but as a bus which was what he had traveled with every time he ever went somewhere. Cars were something you saw outside a window or in a book but not something he expected to use himself.

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On ‎2‎/‎9‎/‎2018 at 3:39 PM, PopRox said:

Oh, my. I read that post and some other ones from that time (when Sissy was new), and wow. Just wow.

Kimmi, you are cordially invited to go get fucked.

Let's sell tickets to the event, and Sissy will be set for a very long time.

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I just wish Kimmi would update.  She has been quiet for so long, but I fear she has no good way of spinning what is happening in that house.

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16 hours ago, jiggleromp said:

I just wish Kimmi would update.  She has been quiet for so long, but I fear she has no good way of spinning what is happening in that house.

That's what's scaring me. She could update while simply omitting anything horrible; I'm sure things weren't peachy with Sissy and Blossom while Kimi was posting all about the dogs or Apple entering kindergarten. The whole 6-7 months of silence thing is too long of a hiatus for even her.

I also think it's weird that she's approved comments that are asking direct questions about the girls, but hasnt answered them. She knows that everyone who reads her blog has a dozen questions as to what the hell she's doing, so I don't we why she wouldn't address them when she's so obsessed with appearances.

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On 2/9/2018 at 4:09 AM, Edhelfin said:

The first time Kimi mentions kicking Sissy out when she turns 18 is well... when she was still in China, during the adoption trip.

The self-titled super mom says "I saw the next four years as something to be struggled through with a kick out the door on her 18th birthday."

http://fencingmama.blogspot.co.uk/2012/07/finally-had-breakthrough.html

She brought her to America anyway and went on to adopt two more girls.

From reading the blog it looks like Sissy was not able to consent to the adoption. Did she have a chance to know what it entailed? To wrap her mind around it? To accept the idea? Or was she, at least in her own perceptions, ripped away?

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1 hour ago, wild little fox said:

From reading the blog it looks like Sissy was not able to consent to the adoption. Did she have a chance to know what it entailed? To wrap her mind around it? To accept the idea? Or was she, at least in her own perceptions, ripped away?

My personal opinion is that she did not understand the whole aspect of it. And Kimmie acted from the beginning that Sissy owes her for being the awesome super mommy/white saviour and should be grateful. How can she do that if her perception of things was as poor as Kimmie says? Poor girl. 

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  • 2 weeks later...

My first post! Anyways kimmy has scrubbed the last post about apple and j/k. Not sure what else has gone missing yet..... 

false alarm. It is still there on my second look. But it would not surprise me if she did start scrubbing. 

Edited by Augustus
False alarm
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I wonder if CPS has gotten involved. Those firemen across the street are all mandated reporters... Kimmie may be clueless, but she'd never admit that they were involved. 

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Doesn't she go on about Sissy being super mentally impaired and unable to do the simplest of things? Yet, in 2012, she was typing relevant questions into a translator. 

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Optimistic thought: Maybe she got married and is happy. Happy busy people often let their depressing blogs slide. She put the kids in school and everyone is getting all the help they need. 

Less optimistic thought: She's depressed and abusing her kids, the fireman has run off, and her house smells like cat pee. 

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1 hour ago, Maggie Mae said:

Optimistic thought: Maybe she got married and is happy. Happy busy people often let their depressing blogs slide. She put the kids in school and everyone is getting all the help they need. 

Less optimistic thought: She's depressed and abusing her kids, the fireman has run off, and her house smells like cat pee. 

There's no way she wouldn't be all over blog-land bragging if she somehow got that fireman to marry her.  My money is on your second scenario.

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i always find it curious that Kimmie doesn't use the girl's real names on her blog.   She reveals all sorts of other inappropriate information about them, so what is her reasoning for not using names?

 

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10 hours ago, Inthemadhouse said:

i always find it curious that Kimmie doesn't use the girl's real names on her blog.   She reveals all sorts of other inappropriate information about them, so what is her reasoning for not using names?

 

I feel like Kimi is creates a little fantasy narrative around her 'family' and giving them silly fake names makes it easier to write whatever she wants about them. Stretch the truth a little. 

She reminds me very much of my ex's mother who was a narcissist. She was always giving people including her children nick names and then imbuing them with the characteristics of that name. Even if it was completely inaccurate.  'Piggy, my sister was always the greedy one' 'we all called my son Poppy cos he's sooo gentle and sensitive'... It was an easy way for her to steer the narrative of the people around her. 

I've since read that it's a common narcissistic trait. 

Edited by cara
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Jie Jie means 'big sister' aparently so her role was settled much before Kimmie adopted Apple who is the dream child. 

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2 hours ago, Edhelfin said:

Jie Jie means 'big sister' aparently so her role was settled much before Kimmie adopted Apple who is the dream child. 

It was; if you go back further on her blog before she'd adopted any of her girls, Kimmie states that she'll refer to her future daughter as "Apple". Then, even as Jie Jie, Sissy, and Blossom entered the picture, she'd still write out letters to a hypothetical "Apple" about how much she was longing to meet her, etc., marked with how long it had been since she'd begun her adoption process (10 months, 20 months...). She couldn't take her eyes off the "prize"--the idea of having a baby daughter--that she wrote off the needs of her existing three. No wonder Sissy began acting out.

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