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Sister Wives: 5 Threads, 5 Adults...Or Are There?


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CJ's AWESOME blog (cynicaljinxwelcome.blogspot.com) has been on hiatus since May, and I know she's coming back, but until then, I did a thing:

https://sisterwivestlc.blogspot.com/

In case any of y'all ever comment on her blog, you can check out this one out and comment, too :)
Because for some reason, not everyone over at blogger'verse is over here on FJ (which hello, I have no clue why, we're awesomesauce).

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Hello Jingerites--

Since TLC is airing old sister wives episodes all freaking day ... shall we assume a new episode is happening tonight??

I've tried to watch two of them so far ... as a distraction to feeling crummy ... but Sister Meri's endless "poor me" catfish whining is even more nauseating this go-round.

If someone is recapping tonight, please give a heads up.

Gratefully, 

Sis Chickenetti 

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@ChickenettiLuvr I might try tonight!

If you just wanted a general "catch up" of what's been going on in the lat few months of the Brown's lives - I did a blog post, with social media links HERE.  And yup, premiere tonight!

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Alright guys and ladies - hubby volunteered to put the kiddos down, so I can try to recap as the show goes :)

I'll most likely wait for the commercial breaks, and make sure to take notes on the side ;)  So I'll probably post the first in a series in about 20-30 minutes.  

Brace yourselves, I've never done this before!  But I'm happy to try :dramallama-nanner:

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Just turned the TV on.  I think I missed a season... but I am back to snark-watch.

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Ohmygawd. I'd forgotten about Tony-the-Mouth-Breather. 

He already lost a thousand points in the opener when he was present for wedding dress shopping. Gah.

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Sister Wives Season Premiere Recap

Dear God, this thing is two hours . . . :pb_eek:

We start with a quick recap of the previous season - Maddie’s wedding, Meri and Kody marriage issues, and Mykelti wants to get married.  And of course, Mariah sharing that she’s gay, and how Meri feels “weird” because they’re relationship is already strained.

Moving onto the: “This season on Sister Wives”-clips

- It’s four months till the wedding (so circa, September for filming, since wedding was in Dec.).

- Kody seems riffed before they even start talking on the couch

- Christine mentions they’ll be dress shopping, and mentions who’s coming, including an emphasis on Tony, which seems to imply she ain’t happy about it . . . Actually she says,”I don’t like that he’s here either, I’m just saying!”, and Janelle doesn’t know why he’s there either.  Robyn is literally pushing him towards dresses after he makes what I assume is a disparaging remark, and chuckles, “What did you say?  What did you say?!”

- We introduce Audrey to the scene!  Meri seems to be embracing things (good for her!)

- Madison announces her pregnancy

Onto the episode!
 

- Reminder from Kody that Mykelti and Tony are engaged, “after only five months.”

- Tony’s extended family don’t speak English very well.  

- Christine seems to be panicking: about the blending of cultures, about the language barrier, about their polygymy lifestyle (and what if they have stereotypes about us!!11!!1).  Then we cut away to just Christine quietly sharing with the cameraman that the real worry is just because she didn’t really embrace their relationship, and what if Tony’s mom doesn’t like her for it? . . . which then cuts back to last season with Mykelti letting her mom know that a guy she talked to for a few weeks wants to ask to”talk” to Kody (about getting his blessing), which Christine manages to respond pretty much how the rest of us did:

Spoiler

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- But as she started to get to know them as a couple, she gave them their blessing 

-We meet Tony’s siblings Lito and Carina, who seem to want to avoid direct eye contact with the cameras :pb_lol:

- Tony seems to have a sarcastic way of interacting with people, but whether cultural/or age,doesn’t really know how to jive it well with everyone - like some people like to respond back to that with sarcasm (like Robyn), others, like Kody and Christine are just like, “ready to fight” (really, that's what Christine said in the talking head, about standing in the kitchen, listening to Tony talk).

- Kody is declared an idol by Tony’s family for having four women to agree to marry him, which just gets Kody in a fit of giggles.  In the couch scene, he tries to clarify that he’s runs by his four oldest daughters (not wives, Kody?), and then Christine interjects that he should enjoy the rare moment of being considered the most “important”.

- There’s 27 people that need to fit on a table that can’t fit more than 24.

- Things break down prtty fast from there.  People are “voting”, getting “outvoted”, and Kody is getting frustrated and says that “emotional women” set this all up (by adding a mini table), not an “engineer”.  Good luck Kody, I think the reverence of your idol status is now dead.

COMMERCIAL BREAK!!
There’s still another 1 and 45 minutes to go y’all!

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That table shenanigans was ridiculous. And Christine ain't the brightest bulb in the lamp, with her toaster phobia. I hope I can make it to the end.

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Thanks for the recap - WeensMan went live on FB and got distracted!

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PART TWO of the Recap

- "Tokeylti" - an orange juice mixed with coconut water if offered as a special drink to the guests (supposedly their "favorites", which Tony asks Mykelti “wait, that’s my favorite?”)  Bless you camera man for catching that one!

- Kody toasts about their marriage contract (where you know, you discuss the serious topics of what you should hopefully -  I don’t TALK about - before getting married).  Tony shares in a couch cutaway that he doesn’t want to plan too far ahead, because what if he says, “Yes, let’s have three kids!”, and then God responds with, “Smite thee!”  Okay,yes, be prepared for God laughing at your plans and all that, but you know, maybe talk about IF you’re going to have kids BEFORE getting married.  Hate to say it, but Kody is right.

- There’s some comedic bits about Tony not being the best translator - but honestly, having translated myself for German to English and back again, it gives you a headache real fast.  Sometimes you just cover the gist for your own sanity lol.  I’ll cut Tony slack on that one ;) 

- Tony and his family seem to blend in just fine - and the families lament about how “alike” (read: difficult) children they were for their families.  Thanks Christine for that riveting story of how even as a child, Mykelti knew to blame Satan when her “hands” wouldn’t listen to her :pb_lol:

- Even though Robyn has had “several intense experiences with him” ????  “He’s a really good guy, with morals - but he’s mischievous.”  Wtf Robyn, spill the deets girl!! 

- After dinner, the womenfolk do the dishes, Kody tries to say he helps clean.  In the couch cutaway, the wives lament that if Mykelti doesn’t want to do dishes, she ain’t doing them.  She won’t be bossed around, even if Tony comes from “traditonal family background”.  Okay, um, red flag number 256 for this relationship y’all.

- Mykelti asks Truely and Tony’s younger sister to be her flower girls.  Solomon gets to be ring bearer.

- Cutaway to Truely and sol being normal preschoolers, nothing too crazy there ;)

- Outside, the cameras have Tony ask his family what they think of marrying him to a polygmist family.  Um, he’s not becoming a polgymist people?  The parents say they support him and respect him, and Mykelti and Maria do seem very comfortable with one another.

- Tony asks Kody if he's going to have anymore kids.  But Kody says at this point, his kids born now, he'd be 70 before they'd leave the house, and short of "divine inspiration", they're done.  We'll see ;)  

- Christine says Mykelti is ready for kids NOW, but they have a "solid financial plan" (goals), before trying to have kids.  Again, we'll see ;)

COMMERCIAL BREAK . . . coming up next, segment on Meri looking at the B&B

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...and yet another reminder why I'm on the Can't-Stand-Tony-Train:

Again, he's demanding that Kody bankroll a wedding + reception for 400 people. That dude needs a UFC hit to the head.

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Shorter segment - PART THREE i.e. All About Meri

- Meri is visiting Utah, and she explains how, while on the route to Madison’s wedding with Christine’s mom, shared the story of this town that Meri’s (great?)grandfather helped get started.  After a few generations, the house was sold out of the family.  She’s been wanting to buy back the house for years.  

- she’s meeting Annie at the house, and the current owner (Vicky) who is selling the place.  

- Meri plans on buying it, with Annie living there and running the day to day (um, so is Annie still living with Christine, or has she decided to move out - because if no one's mentioned this to Christine, that'd be pretty weird).

- House was built in 1870 by Meri’s great-great grandparents (who’s pictures are in the living room, which hey, is pretty darn cool!).  

- The house is built as a “polygamist” house, where the husband wouldn’t be seen wandering around inside the halls from one wife to the next.  So the house was built, where the husband wandered outside, to then find various wives.  There’s A LOT of doors - including one to her great great grandfather’s “man cave”.  *insert dirty office-sex joke here*

- She hasn’t shared her plans yet with her sister wives, but she’s very excited. Though she’s a little worried that they won’t support it.

- Sidenote: from what I can tell, just from the website, Meri and Annie have kept the bones of it, but updated it a little in all the right places, so good job!  

- She hopes that they eventually run it not just as a B&B, but also a wedding venue.

- “Over the last few years, I’ve been trying to figure what to do with myself” ← dear God,thank you editors for not inserting a catfish joke.  BUT seriously, Meri has been floundering for a while, and I’m glad she’s finding something she’s passionate about.

COMMERCIAL BREAK. . . next up, confession to the Sister Wives!

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I know we're not allowed to be mean on FJ anymore, but would it be too mean to start a Mykelti-Tony divorce pool? I foresee... "they're trying to co-parent," as a future episode summary.

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PART FOUR - Meri (sort of) confesses

- So even though Meri plans on buying the B&B, turns out she would need the “financial support” of her sisterwives, so um, maybe should have talked to them, before talking to the owner?

- Talks to Robyn first, because she’s good with “feelings” *chucklesnort*

- Robyn is good as Meri’s “translator” for the family, because Robyn understands her

- Right after telling Robyn, in walks Mariah, with a nervous Meri chuckling away about how if she wants to find out what her and Robyn are discussing, she can come sit down with them.  

- Mariah seems over it, before Meri can really say anything else about it.  Meri explains that Mariah is not the “sentimental” type.

- Mariah the adds that she: “just . . . doesn’t get it.”

- Meri continues to chuckle through it all, and neither Robyn, nor Mariah seem like it would be a sound financial investment.

- In Robyn’s cutaway, she talks about how hard things were when Meri was being so distant with the Catfish saga.  How she missed her friend, but one silver lining is how close her and Christine have gotten.  But yet, she’s still worried about if this purchase would make Meri bolt from the family (fair concern imho).

- In a cutaway with Meri, the director asks Meri if she’d like to reflect on Robyn and Christine growing closer, and Meri gets teary eyed and answers, “Mmhmm” as in, “No thanks.”  She then wipes a tear away, saying it’s “painful subject”.

- Robyn is trying to prep Meri to not get upset with the family’s “base reaction”, and give them a minute to react first . . . good luck Meri, seems like you got an uphill battle on this one!

COMMERCIAL BREAK . . . onto the wedding venue saga!

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...... what I NEED tonight:

A ride to Walgreens for Nyquil & cough syrup with codeine + a mojito. Plus to have been asleep 90 minutes ago.

What I HAVE:

Recaps by @Fun Undies & your snark-a-licious company, Advil, and a warm, flat cup of ginger ale.

Thanks for hanging, Jingerites!

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If I was Mykelti, I would say fuck the LDS church. It's an asshole move to keep her out because of her family. They did the same shit to Maddie. I hope they come to see that there are a bazillion Christian denominations out there.

I hope Meri gets her B&B, she needs something to keep her busy and off the internet. They sure have a lot of money.

I'm loving the I Am Jazz commercials. Fuck you Derick!

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There is something about Tony I just don't like... not sure what it is yet.

Bigger issue:  if religion is going to be part of my life, and my betrothed isn't allowed to join my church, that would be a deal breaker for me.  I just don't see how that is a viable situation.  YMMV.

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4 minutes ago, MarblesMom said:

There is something about Tony I just don't like... not sure what it is yet.

Bigger issue:  if religion is going to be part of my life, and my betrothed isn't allowed to join my church, that would be a deal breaker for me.  I just don't see how that is a viable situation.  YMMV.

Well I'm pretty sure they can still go to church together, they just can't go to the temple together since Mykelti isn't a member. I can see how it wouldn't make much of a difference. The biggest thing theologically is that not being married in the temple would mean they can't be sealed for eternity, but since neither Tony nor Mykelti grew up in the LDS church I could see how that wouldn't be as upsetting for them as for someone who had been in the church from birth. I wouldn't be surprised if they consider themselves sealed for eternity whether or not the LDS officials agree.

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PART FIVE - the wedding venues!

- Wedding is going to take place in St. George, and the families are checking out three different wedding venues.  

- Aspyn is Mykelti’s maid of honor

- Looks like all the Kody, and the Moms’ are there.  Tony’s there, as well as Aspyn, and Ari is in a stroller.

- After explaining that they all feel most comfortable by claiming all the moms equally to strangers (like when the meet the wedding venue coordinator), Kody seems to get a little riled in the talking head, “we broke ourselves against the rocks of publicity, and we’ve earned the right to claim each other.”  But then again, they did spend A LONG time in hiding, so I get it.  But there's obviously still a lot of pain there.

- Cut back to the group checking out the venue.  And mentioning how there’s no alcohol - “part of that is the Mormon religion” - what’s the other part, Tony?

- Sidestory of how Tony was “enlightened” at the age of 17 to become a Mormon.

- Their wedding will be a mix of Mormon, as well as Catholic traditions (for his family).  Sidenote: does this mean, that the Mormon church won’t recognize Tony’s wedding, because Mykelti was denied becoming a member (which yikes, that’s kinda sad).

- Now they're outside, talking about hanging lights, and releasing lanterns with.fire.in them. . . and um, is Tony being serious??

- Cutaway to the wives and Kody deciding that Tony is a mini bridezilla, but good for Mykelti for standing her ground to at least some of it.  

- So now onto the insane guest list: 400 people.  But actually, they’re inviting 500 people, and sometimes, they invite the plus ones, as well as bring all the kids:

Spoiler

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- Kody says, “This sounds really expensive” - sidenote: how much are the Browns having to pay for the wedding, like a percentage, or the whole thing?  Because yeah, if they're paying for the whole thing, then they can have a say in it!

- Mykelti’s cutaway has an eye roll, and she laments about her father, “That man.”

- Um yeah, because nobody told your Dad that he was paying for three times as many people showing up, than Madison’s wedding.  Communication is key people :my_confused:

COMMERCIAL BREAK!

 

COMMERCIAL BREAK

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