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silvia

NATHHAN: Beating Your Special Needs Child, By God's Grace

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silvia

So I recently went down a Bradrick-related rabbit hole and found myself at the NATHHAN website--NATHHAN stands for National Challenged Homeschoolers Associated Network. I haven't read all their content, but one article by Tom and Sherry Bushnell particularly horrified me: http://www.nathhan.com/superparent.htm

TL;DR, 4th section in: 6-year-old special needs child screeches in his room, pretending to be hurt so that his parents come running. He grins from ear to ear when they arrive. His parents, convicted that little Joey is becoming a "tyrant," resolve to beat this malice out of him: "Joey was a big boy, and they knew that a few small spankings would not do the job. It would take weeks of loving, consistent use of the rod, without fail, day after day, to transform their son into what they knew and had seen was possible."

OMG. I'm just going to retire to a corner now and weep for all humanity. 

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Howl

There are a lot of sickening web sites; this ranks at or near the top. 

 

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Waffle Time
JMO
1 hour ago, silvia said:

 

TL;DR, 4th section in: 6-year-old special needs child screeches in his room, pretending to be hurt so that his parents come running. He grins from ear to ear when they arrive. His parents, convicted that little Joey is becoming a "tyrant," resolve to beat this malice out of him: "Joey was a big boy, and they knew that a few small spankings would not do the job. It would take weeks of loving, consistent use of the rod, without fail, day after day, to transform their son into what they knew and had seen was possible."

WTAF.  This is child abuse for any child, but if they have a special needs child who can't even communicate with them to let them know what he needs there needs to be a special place in hell for them and for anyone who advocates this.  Maybe he's smiling because he sees his parents, who until now he associated with love and caring, coming to help him.  But now he will associate them with fear and pain.  Fck them.  The parents will need "loving consistent use of the rod" to transform them.  I need to go cry now.  

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silvia

Now we know what would have happened if the Duggars had ended up with a special needs kid, I guess. :tw_cry:

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Waffle Time
smittykins

I wonder if Josie is special needs?

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JermajestyDuggar
5 minutes ago, smittykins said:

I wonder if Josie is special needs?

What is messed up about the Duggars is that out of all the kids, if Josie had special needs (I have never seen anything to think she does), I bet they wouldn't beat her. I only say that because she is treated differently than all the rest. She's special. She's the miracle baby. She's the youngest. The older three girls must resent that.

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RosyDaisy

WTH did I just read? That is child abuse!

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Happy
ViolaSebastian
Quote

A friend gave them a booklet on character training, opening their eyes to the fact that Joey, although he was disabled, still could be held accountable for his naughtiness.

Oh geez, well, if a Wisdom Booklet says that a special needs child with the mental age of three can possess mens rea, it must be true! :2wankers:

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anachronistic

Fuck them. I am going to send that guy poop.

seizures can look like smiling or laughing. It is creepy as hell but they can. I want to take that rod and beat those 'parents' bloody.

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Meh
acheronbeach

Child development?  Child psychology?  Who needs all that book lernin' when you got a Wisdom Booklet? 

I can't believe anyone would advertise themselves on the internet as so utterly ignorant.  Yet again, and again, and again I come up surprised. 

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purjolok84

I used to think people like this were genuinely ignorant and maybe didn't understand about certain things like disability and mental illness. Hell, a lot of of people who are attracted to moderate - strict religions are also living with undiagnosed mental illnesses or conditions and the practices/uniformity in the religion is what attracts them.

But now I truly think there are people who are wilfully ignorant and choose to behave this way, unChristlike. That someone would think that a kid (who may have communication issues) would purposefully call for them as a joke and then come to the conclusion that they need to be beaten is a fucking monster.

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Sad
Gobsmacked

Michael pearl will be wetting his pants, waving his wee plumbing line and jumping with glee. He has monstrous soul mates to keep his monstrous soul occupied in hell.

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Depressed
polecat
Quote

They contacted their doctor who fully supported the idea of character transformation, but doubted their ability to do it themselves without intervention from professionals.

 

I call BS. No reputable doctor (unless this was a "doctor") would support hitting a child for weeks on end and especially a special needs child.

I've heard stories of non-special needs kids going through screaming phases when they've discovered that screaming at the tops of their lungs would get people running. I've never heard of parents ritually beating their babies/toddlers for it, though. I've never btdt and have no idea how I'd handle it, but hitting a child who just wanted a little attention/love is definitely not an option.

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purjolok84

I call BS. No reputable doctor (unless this was a "doctor") would support hitting a child for weeks on end and especially a special needs child.
I've heard stories of non-special needs kids going through screaming phases when they've discovered that screaming at the tops of their lungs would get people running. I've never heard of parents ritually beating their babies/toddlers for it, though. I've never btdt and have no idea how I'd handle it, but hitting a child who just wanted a little attention/love is definitely not an option.


If a doctor was telling me that spanking was a reasonable treatment for any of my (imaginary) children, not only would I not be seeing them again, I would be reporting them to anyone I could. With all the information we have about how damaging hitting children can be, how anyone can recommend this is beyond me.

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Cleopatra7

What I don't understand is how the same fundies who keep going on about how "children are a blessing" and you should have "as many as God gives you" also claim that said "blessings" are evil, vile sinners who have to have their spirits broken through marathon beating sessions. 

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Waffle Time
JMO

I took a different interpretation of what the "doctor" supposedly said.  Now, he could have been some crazy Christian that believes in corporal punishment, ooooorrrr.... the parents could have interpreted his words to their liking.

Dad: Hello Dr. Smith, We are worried about Tommy.  He's been screaming at night and we thought it was his seizures but when we get there he is just smiling.  He just wants the attention and is totally fine. We need to change this behavior so that we aren't running there all hours of the night and that we all get some rest.  We are all exhausted and it's just getting worse.

Dr: Yes, I think that that would be a good idea.  Why don't I recommend a behavioral therapist for you to work with?  Since Tommy has delays in communication and understanding it might be helpful for you to have some help in getting him to be able to sleep through the night and to know when to call for you for help if he is having a seizure or is otherwise ill.  

Dad: No, we have a book someone gave us to help with this.  I don't think the therapist will be needed.

Dr:  It might help to have a professional help out.  They can give you a lot of tips and advice for helping him with behavior in general as well as sleeping in particular.

Dad:  No, that's ok.  We're good.

Dr.: Ok, well if you change your mind I can always provide you with the number.  Hope everything goes well.  

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onemama

I really wish these homeschooling people would understand that one of the ways God may provide is to send the right professionals into their life.  I read the whole article and it made me very sad. I guess they are blind and will remain blind because they don't want to see, sadly, the children will probably have to suffer because these people tend to isolate themselves. 

Edited by onemama

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Minionmayhem
12 hours ago, polecat said:

I call BS. No reputable doctor (unless this was a "doctor") would support hitting a child for weeks on end and especially a special needs child.

I've heard stories of non-special needs kids going through screaming phases when they've discovered that screaming at the tops of their lungs would get people running. I've never heard of parents ritually beating their babies/toddlers for it, though. I've never btdt and have no idea how I'd handle it, but hitting a child who just wanted a little attention/love is definitely not an option.

I live in super fundie land and many of the families rely on a Chiropractor and a massage therapist who sells YL oils for their medical advice. My guess would be that their "doctor" is one of those sorts and not a developmental pediatrician or anything. As a mom of 2 special needs kids, this kind of advice to parents makes me ill. 

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Mercer
17 hours ago, polecat said:

I've never btdt and have no idea how I'd handle it, but hitting a child who just wanted a little attention/love is definitely not an option.

You seem to be a sane and rational human being, so I'm pretty sure what you would do is try to figure out what the root of the behavior is and respond accordingly. :)

Is the child screaming because he's bored? If so, you would find developmentally appropriate ways to help him learn to entertain himself. Is he screaming because he's in physical pain? If so, you'd take him to a physician. Is it because he's in emotional pain? Then you'd take him to a mental health or behavioral health professional. Is it sensory seeking behavior? You'd help him meet his sensory needs. Is it because he wants attention? Then you'd focus on positively reinforcing more socially acceptable ways for him to express that need. Is it just because it's a novelty for him? If so, yeah it's annoying, but with some planned ignoring he should move past it eventually. Etc etc.

The problem is that a lot of fundies don't see children (or people with special needs of any age) as full human beings with their own independent emotional lives and their own motivations. Lumping every behavior together as "sin" may seem easy on the surface, but a person with a more nuanced way of thinking is going to be a lot better at standing beside their children rather than standing against them.

Edited by Mercer

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Kailash

This is so heartbreaking. There are many reasons I don't believe in the god that fundies do- and things like this really highlight it for me. God won't give you more than you can handle? FALSE. Beating a child (especially special needs) is NEVER the answer. And you're totally in over your head if you think it is.

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Granwych
22 hours ago, anachronistic said:

Fuck them. I am going to send that guy poop.

seizures can look like smiling or laughing. It is creepy as hell but they can. I want to take that rod and beat those 'parents' bloody.

I have had the parents of developmentally delayed clients with seizures tell me with all seriousness that the kid is possessed and needs to have the demon beaten out of them.  You can bet that kid stayed at our group home immediately.

8 hours ago, JMO said:

I took a different interpretation of what the "doctor" supposedly said.  Now, he could have been some crazy Christian that believes in corporal punishment, ooooorrrr.... the parents could have interpreted his words to their liking.

Dad: Hello Dr. Smith, We are worried about Tommy.  He's been screaming at night and we thought it was his seizures but when we get there he is just smiling.  He just wants the attention and is totally fine. We need to change this behavior so that we aren't running there all hours of the night and that we all get some rest.  We are all exhausted and it's just getting worse.

Dr: Yes, I think that that would be a good idea.  Why don't I recommend a behavioral therapist for you to work with?  Since Tommy has delays in communication and understanding it might be helpful for you to have some help in getting him to be able to sleep through the night and to know when to call for you for help if he is having a seizure or is otherwise ill.  

Dad: No, we have a book someone gave us to help with this.  I don't think the therapist will be needed.

Dr:  It might help to have a professional help out.  They can give you a lot of tips and advice for helping him with behavior in general as well as sleeping in particular.

Dad:  No, that's ok.  We're good.

Dr.: Ok, well if you change your mind I can always provide you with the number.  Hope everything goes well.  

Well, if said Dr is a bona fide licensed medical professional, he or she is also a mandated reporter and, at the very least, would want the title of the book.  And followup consults, too.

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imokit
11 hours ago, Granwych said:

Well, if said Dr is a bona fide licensed medical professional, he or she is also a mandated reporter and, at the very least, would want the title of the book.  And followup consults, too.

I'm pretty sure that's been tried with the pearls. Following the book doesn't automatically (legally) mean you're abusing your kids, because they officially put in safeguards by warning parents not to be angry and not to kill children.

I wish reporting child abuse were that easy. And that the Pearls and anyone who advocates hitting children (especially special needs and babies) could be prosecuted.

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roddma

In the Fundie world no child is an individual regardless of special needs. I often wonder why these kinds of articles don't jump start an investigation by authorities or CPS. I know I would be investigating. 

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PsyD2013

The words, "someone gave me a book", would be a red light for me.  I work with kids with developmental disabilities and very challenging behaviors.  In-depth interviews are an important part of data collection.  If teaching replacement behaviors were that easy, I would not have a job.

I'm not sure if Jehovah's Witnesses are considered fundies, but I work with several JW families.  Sometimes they will share something they have read in one of their publications with me.  Today a client shared an article from Watchtower that suggested making a list of things to do when feeling anxious such as listening to music, journaling, inspirational sayings.  She thought that if her ASD child had a similar list it could help.  Sometimes I'm able to use what they share as a springboard, other times not.

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