Counting On: Season 3, Part 3: Shifting Blame and Escape Rooms

[nickelodeon]

ATI members who progress far enough in the Wisdom Booklets discover that Gothardism is actually a cult of the Horned God that has existed within mainstream Christianity for centuries. Hence the many totemic deer heads. But the Duggars don't want us to know this, so they made up a counternarrative about roadkill and taxidermy! WAKE UP AMERICA

[JemimaPuddle-Duck]

@singsingsing what have you done!!??

[justmy2cents]

I'm always impressed with all of the fj detective work. Rufus doesn't seem to be one of the Deer in the warehouse.  In any case, I wouldn't want to sleep in their guest room.

[Carm_88]

14 minutes ago, grandmadugger said:

You know blurry Bin almost looks like Alyssa's husband.

Blurry Ben and John Webster are the same person, Ben wears his glasses to throw us off.  

[PennySycamore]

I've had two visitations of bears in yards.  The first was way back when I was in junior high or high school.  One night, our dogs wouldn't shut up.  We wondered what was bothering them and I think my dad might have checked and seen nothing.  The next day,  my dad noticed that one of his bee hives was knocked over.  We assumed that a bear had knocked it over.  People were being bears that had come down from the mountains occasionally.

The other time was when we were in the Adirondacks with my daughter and her now husband.  In Old Forge, you are required to put your garbage can in a locked shed to keep the bears out.  One night when we'd had steaks for dinner, he forgot to put the trash away properly.  About 3 in the morning, his German shepherd started barking her head off.  My daughter got up to see what was upsetting Scout so.  She looked out the front door and noticed the garbage can knocked over and the garbage strewn over the yard.  The next morning, we noticed a window screen in the living room and huge claw marks on the house outside the window.  That damn bear was trying to get in!  That's our closest encounter with a bear.

[grandmadugger]

22 minutes ago, Carm_88 said:

Blurry Ben and John Webster are the same person, Ben wears his glasses to throw us off.  

It would explain why Bin did a Poli Sci major at CC.  I prefer to think that Bin is the love child of Taliban Dan and Guinn.

[ViolaSebastian]

Of all the Duggar conspiracies, Roadkillgate (Taxidermygate? Rufusgate?) has to be one of my very favorites. 

[grandmadugger]

So which headline will the tabloids pick up first?

Joe Duggar secretly dating a coat rack with a wig

Jinger Duggar didn't really run over Rufus but sacrificed it

Jinger Duggar didn't really run over Rufus but found him in a shed

Ben Seewald is really Sen. Webster's love child.

Jessa Duggar and Alysa Bates are sister wives

[ViolaSebastian]

3 minutes ago, grandmadugger said:

So which headline will the tabloids pick up first?

Joe Duggar secretly dating a coat rack with a wig

Jinger Duggar didn't really run over Rufus but sacrificed it

Jinger Duggar didn't really run over Rufus but found him in a shed

Ben Seewald is really Sen. Webster's love child.

Jessa Duggar and Alysa Bates are sister wives

Rufus is actually child number 20, the spawn of a love affair with a part-man, part-deer who saw Michelle mowing the lawn in a bikini and had to seduce her. Rufus was kept in the attic to prevent further scandal, until he caught rubella from unvaccinated Josie and had to be put down. 

[VeganCupcake]

On 2/13/2017 at 10:06 PM, nst said:

that was beyond boring.  The only thing entertaining was Derick's impression of Jinger and jessa actual admitting she has been crying 

I thought it was interesting when Jessa said "I have mixed feelings about the wedding." She was referring to Jinger leaving, but I think she actually has mixed feelings about knowing her sister outdid her by FAR in the husband department. And is possibly a little jealous. Jeremy is the only well-spoken, outwardly normal-appearing Duggar spouse so far. 

[singsingsing]

I don't think Jeremy is that much better looking than Ben, and I would much rather be married to Ben than Jeremy. Obviously I'm not in Jessa's head, but an astrologer came to Free Jinger once, did my birth chart, and told me I must have an affinity with Jessa because we were born under the same rare moon phase, or something like that* so I like to think I have some insight into her psyche.

*I wish I were kidding.

[CreationMuseumSeasonPass]

You know how hard it was not to bust out laughing in the break room while reading these "conspiracies"? I agree with a previous poster. The Duggars are boring. But, WE are hilarious. 

[Snarkle Motion]

9 minutes ago, VeganCupcake said:

I thought it was interesting when Jessa said "I have mixed feelings about the wedding." She was referring to Jinger leaving, but I think she actually has mixed feelings about knowing her sister outdid her by FAR in the husband department. And is possibly a little jealous. Jeremy is the only well-spoken, outwardly normal-appearing Duggar spouse so far. 

Oh I agree 100%! I also get the sense that Jeremy wants the limelight and would love to have a "brand," as does Jessa. I get the sense that she is plotting to copy chip and joana gaines, would love to have a style and homemaking spinoff show. I sense the "setting up Jingers apartment" was her starting to market this skill set, I see her studying up, reigning in ben's extremes, controlling their image. I sense Jeremy also wouldn't mind being a televangelist or find a way to use fame to his benefit. i bet she can't help thinking how much farther she'd go with Jeremy by her side instead.

[allthegoodnamesrgone]

3 hours ago, singsingsing said:

This has got to be the most random Duggar conspiracy theory I've heard yet. They found a deer head while cleaning out a house, and for no reason whatsoever, with no discernible benefit to themselves, decided to make up a random story about Jinger hitting it with her car and their taxidermist friends offering to stuff it. They all then colluded with each other to keep this dastardly charade going, and breezily lied about it to the world, again... for literally no reason. lol!

I mean, I guess it's possible. Anything's possible. Maybe their entire family is a social experiment, and they've never been fundamentalists at all. Or maybe Jinger is into the occult and she sacrificed the deer and uses the head to do spells when no one else is looking. Jeremy is some kind of neo pagan priest who really was pretending to be a fundie to rescue her, and that's why the deer head now has a place of honour above their bed.

#IBelieveInRufus

Holy fucking hell I just choked on my lunch. Best. Theory. EVER. I agree there are a whole lot of BEC theory's about the Duggar's out there. This is redneck country, She hit a deer, called taxidermy friend said he could have the deer if he gave them the mounted head. He gets a freezer full of deer meat she gets a dumb dear head. Shit like this goes down all the time in the backwoods of, name your state. 

[Kelsey]

1 hour ago, grandmadugger said:

You know blurry Bin almost looks like Alyssa's husband.

When I saw the pics, my first thought was "Why is John posing with alternative Rufus?"

[eveandadam]

19 minutes ago, Kelsey said:

When I saw the pics, my first thought was "Why is John posing with alternative Rufus?"

We should start a new series: Fundies who look alike but are not (closely) related

my first pick:

Priscilla and Pecan

[Berty K]

Quote

1 hour ago, Snarkle Motion said:

I sense the "setting up Jingers apartment" was her starting to market this skill set, I see her studying up, reigning in ben's extremes, controlling their image. I sense Jeremy also wouldn't mind being a televangelist or find a way to use fame to his benefit

Yes totally agree. I think Bin is working towards becoming educated enough that Babee can justify making him an assistant pastor and then they will move towards televangelism with "homemaker" and "helpmeet" features from the J-Wives.  

Once in awhile JillyMuffin will come to beg for money for their mission work and maybe Smuggar will lead courses on overcoming porn addiction  

A true family affair  

 

[IReallyAmHopewell]

1 hour ago, Snarkle Motion said:

Oh I agree 100%! I also get the sense that Jeremy wants the limelight and would love to have a "brand," as does Jessa. I get the sense that she is plotting to copy chip and joana gaines, would love to have a style and homemaking spinoff show. I sense the "setting up Jingers apartment" was her starting to market this skill set, I see her studying up, reigning in ben's extremes, controlling their image. I sense Jeremy also wouldn't mind being a televangelist or find a way to use fame to his benefit. i bet she can't help thinking how much farther she'd go with Jeremy by her side instead.

1. Jeremy in politics. After all he's from an evil Blue State. He'll go home convert the masses, fill his quiver with arrows for God, then get elected to the State House or something.

2.  Jessa: "Marry in haste, repent at liesure." You took the first brainless penis that asked. Live and learn.

3. Jessa as an HTV or similar style guru... possible catchy show titles: "Roadkill Decorating?" "Trailer Park Trash to Treasure?" "Thrift that Shop" "Couch by the Roadside Redo?"

4.  Bet they are so wishing they'd gone with Elliott Spurgeon since they aren't calling Henry "Willberforce"....ugh....

 

[HereticHick]

I really really want a deer head in my office now y'all!!

 

[Snarkle Motion]

1 hour ago, IReallyAmHopewell said:

1. Jeremy in politics. After all he's from an evil Blue State. He'll go home convert the masses, fill his quiver with arrows for God, then get elected to the State House or something.

2.  Jessa: "Marry in haste, repent at liesure." You took the first brainless penis that asked. Live and learn.

3. Jessa as an HTV or similar style guru... possible catchy show titles: "Roadkill Decorating?" "Trailer Park Trash to Treasure?" "Thrift that Shop" "Couch by the Roadside Redo?"

4.  Bet they are so wishing they'd gone with Elliott Spurgeon since they aren't calling Henry "Willberforce"....ugh....

 

You are so right about the political aspirations. Although I suspect Jinger would hate that, she's already used to being in the spotlight. He may be more clever than I give him credit for, the Duggar girls are already media savy, camera ready, and now they've been pretty thoroughly vetted for skeletons in the closets.

I suspect Jessa would rather be rich and not have to work. I think she'd like some of the perks of being a politicians wife but a lot of it involves meet and greets, fundraising, and other boring events that she'd get tired of real fast. I think she likes the idea of Internet or Instagram celebrity - couple hours of work, style some shit or whatever, rake in the money and enjoy. But the best would have been marrying someone wealthy to begin with. It seems, besides Jeremy, the Bates girls have far "superior" mates. Higher status, overall more attractive, and some with fame/political influence.

Poor Jill. I see Jessa, and perhaps evan Jinger subtly planning their futures together with (or for in Jessa's case) their husbands. Jill thought if she did everything right and prayed hard enough she'd be taken care of but it seems there's little connection/communication  in ther marriage and their aimless at the moment.

[Fighter]

6 hours ago, justmy2cents said:

The one in the middle with the khaki shirt has been seen with Joe a handful of times. Don't know if she's 18 yet, not that they would consider that too young. To me her hair is blonde. It's similar to mine which can look lighter or darker depending on lighting.

You need serious help with your investigation skills, the blonde woman appeared in the Seewald baby shower pics ( with some big bling on that finger I might add) on Jan 16. On Jan 23 Joseph was seen talking to a brunette at the March for Life rally! Than last night the same blonde woman ( with said bling)  was posted sitting by Joe at the family Valentines dinner/party oh she totally had a plate in front of her, her arm in her black sleeve was blocking it. There is no way this blonde woman could be a Caldwell daughter with highlights! By the way how many courtships has FJ correctly predicted? This Board reminds me more of middle school every day I'm not saying there's no chance of them courting in the future, they have been photographed talking together no one can predict the future! Did any of you date every member of the opposite sex you talked and walked with? I'm just glad the Duggar's have friends of the they can be hang out with! 

[justmy2cents]

17 minutes ago, Fighter said:

You need serious help with your investigation skills, the blonde woman appeared in the Seewald baby shower pics ( with some big bling on that finger I might add) on Jan 16. On Jan 23 Joseph was seen talking to a brunette at the March for Life rally! Than last night the same blonde woman ( with said bling)  was posted sitting by Joe at the family Valentines dinner/party oh she totally had a plate in front of her, her arm in her black sleeve was blocking it. There is no way this blonde woman could be a Caldwell daughter with highlights! By the way how many courtships has FJ correctly predicted? This Board reminds me more of middle school every day I'm not saying there's no chance of them courting in the future, they have been photographed talking together no one can predict the future! Did any of you date every member of the opposite sex you talked and walked with? I'm just glad the Duggar's have friends of the they can be hang out with! 

I don't need any help from some color blind bitch who's been on here for all of 2 minutes. And fyi, Fundies don't have close opposite sex friends.  If they're seen together often you bet your ass something is brewing.  May not materialize into anything but they're not just buddies.

[BlessaYourHeart]

I'm laying in bed with tears running down my face from laughing so hard at the conspiracy theories 

this is why I love Fj! 

 

[grandmadugger]

32 minutes ago, Fighter said:

You need serious help with your investigation skills, the blonde woman appeared in the Seewald baby shower pics ( with some big bling on that finger I might add) on Jan 16. On Jan 23 Joseph was seen talking to a brunette at the March for Life rally! Than last night the same blonde woman ( with said bling)  was posted sitting by Joe at the family Valentines dinner/party oh she totally had a plate in front of her, her arm in her black sleeve was blocking it. There is no way this blonde woman could be a Caldwell daughter with highlights! By the way how many courtships has FJ correctly predicted? This Board reminds me more of middle school every day I'm not saying there's no chance of them courting in the future, they have been photographed talking together no one can predict the future! Did any of you date every member of the opposite sex you talked and walked with? I'm just glad the Duggar's have friends of the they can be hang out with! 

 

You do realize that the Duggars are only allowed to talk to the opposite sex if they are related or getting to know each other right?  They aren't your typical family that has friends of the opposite sex they are either getting to know each other for the purpose of courting, courting, or engaged.  That's their three options in life with a member of the opposite sex they aren't related to.

[MargaretElliott]

@Fighter, in the real world, the normal world, if a guy was spending time with a woman, it would be just life. But to the Duggars and those who share their beliefs, that's not just life. That's suspicious. She could be giving away pieces of her heart. She could be tempting him. They might -gasp- want to date! Their misogyny, mistrust, and control issues of these beliefs manifest in such a way as to make normal, platonic relationships between men and women impossible. So if two people are regularly photographed together, there's a good chance that they might be in that "special friend" phase, because there's very few scenarios where they would be photographed together if they weren't. I think that's one of the reasons why a courtship is so likely and why this belief system is so toxic and damaging.

Not sure how many courtships FJ has predicted (none that I can recall), but there's a first time for everything. Only time will tell.

ETA: We correctly predicted Jill's courtships based off one Instagram picture. Perhaps it was a coincidence, or luck. But I'll take it as a win