Jinger and Jeremy - Social Media Silence

[FleeJanaFree]

 

11 hours ago, VeganCupcake said:

Stop right there. Please don't treat me as tarnishing the pro-choice moment, when this MAN who refuses to use condoms votes Republican ok? 

Also I would never get an abortion! I said many times that he would be much more upset by a kid than I would. 

FJ, we can't fix stupid.

 

but I'm a glutton for punishment so I will respond again:

 

You hold the power, vegancupcake. Stop acting helpless for fucks sake. It is pathetic. Tell him no condom, no sex. One of two things will happen: he will care about you and put a condom on like an adult who cares about the woman's he's  screwing. Or he will leave you to go raw with another idiot who refuses to stand up for herself and you'll realize exactly what you are to him-a fuck.

 

i don't give a shit what his political views are! You act like that matters in YOUR choice in how YOU have sex. So he's not willing to protect against a pregnancy, doesn't want a kid, but he will shame you if you get an abortion? What great options! Round of applause for this winner. Wonderful. Top notch guy.

[SweetFellowshipper]

@Carm_88, I noticed you posted about pregnancy sucking but I haven't been able to find it again-- pregnancy has been seriously miserable for me. Emotionally,physically, everything. Nothing has made me more sure of my previous pro choice stance than being pregnant. And I'm married and tried hard to get pregnant!! And I have a wonderfully supportive husband who does nearly all of the cooking and housework, and a cushy university job. I don't regret it at all but I can't imagine doing this without a partner, with an unsupportive partner, with having just gone through trauma, while going through poverty, while working at a stressful office job or waitressing or doing manual labor, with an unsupportive family, with an insecure housing situation, during college...Jesus Christ. Plus, there are SO many things that you learn can go wrong in the first 12 weeks of pregnancy, it's basically a crap shoot whether you'll miscarry. Something like 50% of women do. Given that, choosing it doesn't seem all that different. 

[allthegoodnamesrgone]

12 hours ago, VeganCupcake said:

Stop right there. Please don't treat me as tarnishing the pro-choice moment, when this MAN who refuses to use condoms votes Republican ok? 

Also I would never get an abortion! I said many times that he would be much more upset by a kid than I would. 

Sorry, it sounds like we are ganging up on you but know, at least from me it is from a place of concern.  I will say one more thing your boyfriend isn't a man, he's an asshole a man is responsible about sex, and doesn't knowingly and recklessly have unprotected sex because it isn't HIS job. BULL SHIT, it is just as much HIS responsibility as it is yours.  Don't let him out of it because he's the man and he is in charge,  tell him condom or he can take his dick and his two hands and go fuck himself. 

[MargaretElliott]

12 hours ago, VeganCupcake said:

when this MAN who refuses to use condoms

He doesn't get to choose. You do. Because it's your body and your pregnancy. Not his. It's your call. Not his. It's your choice. Not his. Make it a good one.

Even if you don't use condoms, there's plenty of other birth control choices. You can talk to your doctor and find one that's right for you. By saying HE refuses to use condoms, you're not taking responsibility, you're pushing the blame on someone else. But it is 100% your choice and your responsibility. I'm not saying his opinion doesn't matter, but... his opinion basically doesn't matter. Take this from someone for whom sex is a luxury. Take this from someone who had to work through lots of painful medical procedures for sex to be possible. You're so lucky- you have no idea. You can have healthy, normal sexual relationships. It just makes me so mad when I see people who have this option, who have this possibility, acting so reckless. Don't take sex for granted. Don't be stupid about it. Your birth control methods and your pregnancies are no one's responsibility but your own. Not your boyfriend's. Your. Own. And no one else's.

Did you get abstinence-only sex ed in high school or something?

[QuiverDance]

@VeganCupcake  If you're not a troll, and I think you might be, is there possibly the slightest chance that you actually want to get pregnant?  Because the subtext of what you're saying is that you want to get pregnant, and you think having this guy's kid is going to be your ticket to some kind of payday.  Trust me.  It won't be.  First of all, this guy (just from the few sentences you've posted about him) sounds like a selfish douche.  You don't want to coparent with a selfish douche who won't marry you.  You also run the risk of this selfish douche with more money than you trying to take  your kid away from you.  

Long story short, stop being an idiot.  Seriously.  

[VelociRapture]

1 hour ago, SweetFellowshipper said:

@Carm_88, I noticed you posted about pregnancy sucking but I haven't been able to find it again-- pregnancy has been seriously miserable for me. Emotionally,physically, everything. Nothing has made me more sure of my previous pro choice stance than being pregnant. And I'm married and tried hard to get pregnant!! And I have a wonderfully supportive husband who does nearly all of the cooking and housework, and a cushy university job. I don't regret it at all but I can't imagine doing this without a partner, with an unsupportive partner, with having just gone through trauma, while going through poverty, while working at a stressful office job or waitressing or doing manual labor, with an unsupportive family, with an insecure housing situation, during college...Jesus Christ. Plus, there are SO many things that you learn can go wrong in the first 12 weeks of pregnancy, it's basically a crap shoot whether you'll miscarry. Something like 50% of women do. Given that, choosing it doesn't seem all that different. 

Same here. I was prochoice before my pregnancies and my experiences have only made me more certain that all women should have the right to choose for themselves. Even women who have the easiest pregnancies would likely agree it's hard at times. Same with raising children in general (regardless of how you welcome them to your family.) 

The American Pregnancy Association estimates that between 10 -25% of clinically confirmed pregnancies end in miscarriage. "Chemical" miscarriages - when a miscarriage occurs shortly after implantation - account for 50-75% of all miscarriages. So it's likely that everyone knows at least one woman or couple who has suffered a miscarriage at some point, even if they don't know it or discuss it.

http://americanpregnancy.org/pregnancy-complications/miscarriage/

[marmalade]

3 hours ago, nst said:

Where is this latest video online?

 I found it yesterday embedded in an US Weekly article. I posted it in the now closed show thread. I think someone also posted the article in this thread. I just felt it was show-related (they did show it during a commercial break).

[flycat]

I don't know if she is pregnant yet or not but it sounds like they have something to do everyday with building up the church and settling to to Laredo.  Having a hobby can be a form of birth control since you aren't lonesome and bored all day. 

[MoonFace]

On 2/19/2017 at 2:06 PM, JMO said:

@sparklymagie I have a lot of friends that use mirena or other IUDs and love it.  They need to be replaced every 5 yrs but they are no worry birth control. Of course they don't prevent STIs but they do prevent pregnancy more than 99%. 

Ummmm - my daughter was an IUD baby.   Still in place (and I was nursing) when I got pregnant.   

[Kelsey]

1 hour ago, QuiverDance said:

@VeganCupcake  If you're not a troll, and I think you might be, is there possibly the slightest chance that you actually want to get pregnant?  Because the subtext of what you're saying is that you want to get pregnant, and you think having this guy's kid is going to be your ticket to some kind of payday.  Trust me.  It won't be.  First of all, this guy (just from the few sentences you've posted about him) sounds like a selfish douche.  You don't want to coparent with a selfish douche who won't marry you.  You also run the risk of this selfish douche with more money than you trying to take  your kid away from you.  

Long story short, stop being an idiot.  Seriously.  

This was my impression as well.  @VeganCupcake Your posts come across as like you are a really young girl that is okay with with the idea of getting pregnant by this dude because he's wealthy. Obviously, only you know if that's true but if it is, please reconsider your stance. Just because a man is wealthy (or perceived as being wealthy) doesn't mean he is going to support the child (or even stay with you). The fact that he refuses to use condoms  while not wanting a child shows that he's not really big on personal responsibility. There is a pretty decent chance that if you do get pregnant, he's out and you're left holding the bag. After all, you knew he didn't want kids (sarcasm but I've heard many a "man" say exactly that). 

 

As to the bolded- you don't want to marry a selfish douche either.

[Coy Koi]

One more thing, @VeganCupcake, people who vote Republican or identify as pro-life have abortions or encourage others to have abortions all the damn time. Have you directly told your boyfriend that in the (rather likely) event that he impregnates you, you plan to have the baby? If not, and even if you take none of the rest of the advice that's been offered here, please do that one thing.

[QuiverDance]

14 minutes ago, Kelsey said:

This was my impression as well.  @VeganCupcake Your posts come across as like you are a really young girl that is okay with with the idea of getting pregnant by this dude because he's wealthy. Obviously, only you know if that's true but if it is, please reconsider your stance. Just because a man is wealthy (or perceived as being wealthy) doesn't mean he is going to support the child (or even stay with you). The fact that he refuses to use condoms  while not wanting a child shows that he's not really big on personal responsibility. There is a pretty decent chance that if you do get pregnant, he's out and you're left holding the bag. After all, you knew he didn't want kids (sarcasm but I've heard many a "man" say exactly that). 

 

As to the bolded- you don't want to marry a selfish douche either.

 

 

This is a very good point, and one I should have made clear.  This whole situation is bad news.  I hope you're a troll, really. 

[Carm_88]

2 minutes ago, QuiverDance said:

This is a very good point, and one I should have made clear.  This whole situation is bad news.  I hope you're a troll, really. 

I'm beginning to think that this person is a troll. 

[TeamDefraudinSquad]

16 hours ago, VeganCupcake said:

 I appreciate yall's input! I guess I just went along with what he wanted to do cause I figured it must work if he has been doing this pullout thing forever and has no kids, and seems really dead set against having them. But I will reconsider. 

Please, please reconsider! And I mean that in the kindest, warmest way possible. I got pregnant accidentally on the pill, just from not taking my dose at the same time one too many days one month, so it is almost a certainty you will get pregnant if you keep using the pull-out method with your boyfriend. You said you'd never get an abortion, but pregnancy is very physically uncomfortable, in my experience, and really one of those things that's better to be going through only if you really, really want a baby. Even on days you eat beautiful, healthy meals, you will feel bloated. Being pregnant is like being in that uncomfortable day or two before your period every single day.

Also, even if you've got a good partner, you never know how they'll respond to the news of you being pregnant. After I told my husband I was pregnant, overnight he started treating me like a delicate flower who couldn't handle our usual workout routine without something horrible happening to me, and it was so weird for me! It seems like a small thing, but I was not expecting that kind of response from my husband, who is usually very feminist, so it took me aback and made me upset at first, until he was able to convince me he wasn't being benevolently sexist towards me just for being pregnant, he was just scared of me getting hurt more than before. 

Just my two cents. Please take care of yourself! ♡

[SassyPants]

56 minutes ago, Carm_88 said:

I'm beginning to think that this person is a troll. 

I thought it pages ago.

[formergothardite]

I sure hope it is a troll. 

[JMO]

1 hour ago, MoonFace said:

Ummmm - my daughter was an IUD baby.   Still in place (and I was nursing) when I got pregnant.   

The failure rate is about 1/1000.  Considering that there are 10s of thousands of women, easily, in the US with an IUD there will be some babies born each year despite an IUD.  However, that's a lower failure rate than most other methods (hell, I know of some couples who conceived despite their hubby getting a vasectomy), and it's definitely lower than the "pull out" method.  It's also incredibly low maintenance.  No daily meds, no need to keep stocked on condoms, and it's reversible. 

[singsingsing]

No birth control method is 100% effective. Not even abstinence (you may choose to not have sex, but unfortunately some women have that choice taken from them). There is no comparison between an IUD and pulling out. Someone will always be that unlucky one out of a hundred women whose IUD fails. That's life. If you know you don't want a baby, much better to go with the .5% risk than the 25% risk.

Edit: I lied. A total hysterectomy would be 100% effective. But we're talking realistic options here.

[meowmeow19]

I hope I don't sound cranky ( in my defense I do have norovirus at the moment), but can we start talking about nail polish or something? Isn't that what we use to do back in the day when conversations either got too heated or went on too long. Maybe it's me, but I doubt another version of the 50+ posts directed at vegancupcake is going to change her decision if the previous 50+ posts haven't already.

[Queen]

Reading all this makes me so happy I'm a lesbian  

(not that all same-sex couples can't conceive. Some can, due to one of them being transgender, for example.) 

My mom taught me to always use a condom. Always. No exuces. Well, due to my sexuality I've never needed one, but if you cut it up it works as a dental dam! 

Also there are tons of sexual activites you can do (like oral, for example), even as a straight couple, that don't get you pregnant (but make sure to not catch any STDs). I kinda get mad when people claim that penetrative penis-in-vagina-sex is the only sex that counts... 

[SilverBeach]

42 minutes ago, meowmeow19 said:

I hope I don't sound cranky ( in my defense I do have norovirus at the moment), but can we start talking about nail polish or something? Isn't that what we use to do back in the day when conversations either got too heated or went on too long. Maybe it's me, but I doubt another version of the 50+ posts directed at vegancupcake is going to change her decision if the previous 50+ posts haven't already.

I had my most recent manicure done in red chrome. Love it!

[meowmeow19]

@SilverBeach  Those are fierce AF! I love the chrome. Btw, am I the last one to notice that Sephora is discontinuing the Formula X polish?

[Jilli]

On 2/6/2017 at 7:19 PM, Zola said:

What is a wife supposed to do if the sex her husband wants is with a woman who isn't his wife for the sheer thrill of having sex with a woman who isn't his wife?

How would that be the wife's fault? She could be throwing the taco at him 24/7, and if he isn't turned on by wife sex but is turned on by non- wife sex, how is that on her?

I'm so sorry. My dad had that last year. I've never seen him taken do wn by something as easily as that.

I can't show you a picture but I'm super excited to try the hot pink nail polis I got for Christmas. 

[JMO]

So this is an off shoot of the debate, and I agree it's time to move on, but when I read about this it fascinated me.  There are actually two case reports of young women who got pregnant despite not having vaginas.  In one case she was having oral sex with her boyfriend and when she turned up pregnant they discovered she had a fistula (connection) from her GI tract to her uterus that was previously unknown.  The other was having anal sex and also had a fistula, her's was just lower down.  Sometimes life has a way of procreating no matter what.  

[VeganCupcake]

2 hours ago, flycat said:

I don't know if she is pregnant yet or not but it sounds like they have something to do everyday with building up the church and settling to to Laredo.  Having a hobby can be a form of birth control since you aren't lonesome and bored all day. 

So true! Jessa & Ben have a lot of free time on their hands with minimal responsibility. Jeremy has an actual demanding job. What a moron though to JUST NOW be saying maybe they will learn Spanish. How many months gas Hebron been pastor of this on-the-border church again??? 

2 hours ago, Carm_88 said:

I'm beginning to think that this person is a troll. 

I'm not joking if that's what you mean. When we first got together he said he would do the pullout and I asked if he would finish inside if I got on hormonal bc, & he said no it's still too risky. So I just figured whatever, maybe this is the common consensus. I have also hooked up with a couple guys prior to this relationship who begged to take off the condon (I said no) knowing that I'm not on bc. So it must be kinda common?? But like I said, I will take everyone's advice to heart! I'm shocked at all the various ways people got pregnant in this thread. 

Btw we are not some sort of rural ignorant bumpkins, we live in a major world class city.