Priss & Pecan, Pt. 3: Glory Days Dwindling Away

[nokidsmom]

30 minutes ago, LadyCrow1313 said:

And didn't they fly to Australia when she was heavily pregnant w/Paul?

 

Yes, they did.  IIRC they got back from that trip with only a few weeks to spare.

29 minutes ago, Jana814 said:

I have to say I think their father pushed them into marrying these men. Maybe not so much Priscilla but I think he pushed Anna into marrying Josh. 

I have long been of the opinion that Pa Keller bears a lot of responsibility for his daughters respective marriage situations: Anna and Esther both wound up with douchebags and Pris with clueless Pecan Thief.   Pris might be slightly better off but only in a material sense that her husband does have a job and does actually provide for his family even if the source is IBLP.  Regarding Pa Keller, as he transferred his authority to these men, as much as I hate the whole transfer of authority patriarchal BS, if you believe in this concept then you bear the responsibility if you give it over to a guy who doesn't do right by your daughter.

 

[Dandruff]

3 hours ago, nokidsmom said:

I think you make a good point about Priscilla versus Anna.  Pris probably doesn't know what she is missing so she's not going to experience hurt and dissatisfaction over what she is getting out of her marriage.  Blissfully unaware at best, constant state of confusion at worst but possibly writing it off to it being her, not Davey.  Anna, on the other hand, went into her marriage clearly loving and valuing Josh, and thought she was getting the same in return.  She found out the hard way that was not the case and the heartbreak is obvious.

Agree that she probably doesn't know what she's missing.  She was raised to do what she's doing, and they tend to socialize with other patriarchal families where women may not be especially appreciated.  For all we know, she feels lucky where she is.  David has steady employment (unless the whole thing implodes, am hoping), I suspect she's friends with lots of other women, and I expect many of them live nearby. 

I also think she's at least as over-the-top fundie as David is, and possibly more, so they're compatible in that regard.  As long as David doesn't pull a "Joshley" or a "Shrader" she might be happily counting her blessings each day.

I still wish he showed her more affection though - at least on camera.

[Jana814]

I highly doubt that David would pull a Josh. 

[VooDooChild]

3 minutes ago, Jana814 said:

I highly doubt that David would pull a Josh. 

Maybe not with a woman...

[JenniferJuniper]

46 minutes ago, Jana814 said:

I highly doubt that David would pull a Josh. 

I think David would pull Josh....oops, my dyslexia again!

[marmalade]

Still pregnant, and Davey had to mention that she had a checkup! Probably her first in months. Isn't today her due date?

 

[Fascinated]

Priscilla looks incredible. You'd never guess from that photo that she's nine months pregnant.  I hope she's happy. (He seems so turdy.)

[Dandruff]

2 hours ago, marmalade said:

Still pregnant, and Davey had to mention that she had a checkup! Probably her first in months. Isn't today her due date?

I think tomorrow, but whatever - it's soon.   Suspect that the checkup was with an all-female IBLP birthing team, well-trained in the biblical implications of labor and birth.

Hope Priscilla was comfortable at that metal picnic table.

[nastyhobbitses]

9 hours ago, nokidsmom said:

This is my feeling about him too   He clearly doesn't respect her though I don't think he physically or verbally abuses her.  I suspect Davey is one of these guys who thinks of himself as a decent Christian husband because he does (or does not) do certain things for his wife and family.  Ok, fine but that's not enough.   He appears to have no "emotional" intelligence, he doesn't seem in the least attuned to Priscilla emotionally or even consider her needs, he goes his merry way and expects her to go along no questions asked.   He's been doing this ever since they got married but the fact they have two kids and another on the way doesn't seem to register with him.  He doesn't seem to realize that being a good partner is to be considerate of the other person, that there's a certain level of give and take, it's not just that they are there to give, give, give to you.    I feel for Pris in that she probably has a very emotionally distant marriage but has no way to even articulate her feelings about that, perhaps even recognize it.

He strikes me as the sort of person who sees relationships as transactional. I do this, so that means that you have to do this.

[JillyO]

That looks like quite the date night.

[uber frau]

7 hours ago, VooDooChild said:

Maybe not with a woman...

His BFF Robert is moving to TX. I hope Priscilla &Kendalynn get along because I'm fairly sure that Robert &the Pecan  Thief will be spending a good bit of time together.

 

Also,is anyone else impressed /taken aback at how Pris/TPT ALWAYS match. I have enough of a struggle funding an outfit for myself in the morning.  Finding one that matches my partner would be bwyond me.

[SavageMom]

I'm taken aback too, especially since I'm assuming they largely shop at thrift stores. In a regular store, it's easier to find matching clothes but at a thrift store - that's a lot of searching!

[luv2laugh]

They probably match because JB and Michelle do it too and they idolize JB and Michelle.

[nastyhobbitses]

6 hours ago, uber frau said:

His BFF Robert is moving to TX. I hope Priscilla &Kendalynn get along because I'm fairly sure that Robert &the Pecan  Thief will be spending a good bit of time together.

 

Also,is anyone else impressed /taken aback at how Pris/TPT ALWAYS match. I have enough of a struggle funding an outfit for myself in the morning.  Finding one that matches my partner would be bwyond me.

I don't think their owners really care about them being compatible as friends or companions. Besides, they have SO MUCH in common! They're both women, they both love Jesus, they both have hair....totally BFFs already!

[JenniferJuniper]

7 hours ago, uber frau said:

His BFF Robert is moving to TX. I hope Priscilla &Kendalynn get along because I'm fairly sure that Robert &the Pecan  Thief will be spending a good bit of time together.

I don't see them as much of a match.  And Pris seems very sweet, but I'm not sure many people could take her for long periods of time, even fundie wives.

I just noticed that poor Kendalynn is a few months away for birthing blessing 4.   Wonder if Pecan and his BFF are in baby siring competition.   So masculine!

[JermajestyDuggar]

10 hours ago, JillyO said:

That looks like quite the date night.

They splurged! 

[JenniferJuniper]

4 hours ago, JermajestyDuggar said:

They splurged! 

Looks like a shared shake though.     Mustn't have been part of the twofer.

[BobTheWalrus]

17 hours ago, JermajestyDuggar said:

On 12/10/2016 at 6:46 AM, JillyO said:

That looks like quite the date night.

They splurged! 

I kind of wish this kind of comment didn't happen. Some people just don't have a lot of money, but they still want to go and have a bit of time together, and I think it's insensitive to shame them for that.  If they were wealthy, and he was spending loads of money on himself but only taking his wife to cheap restaurants, that would be snarkworthy. But they don't strike me as having tons of spare cash to spend on fancy dinners. Or maybe they just don't enjoy the atmosphere in very formal restaurants.

[acheronbeach]

I'm actually pretty excited about the updates we'll get one again from Davey & Robert, the Very Special Friends. It's been far too long. 

[nokidsmom]

On 10/11/2016 at 9:47 PM, nastyhobbitses said:

He strikes me as the sort of person who sees relationships as transactional. I do this, so that means that you have to do this.

Just want to briefly jump back to this and comment that ITA on this.   I get that same vibe from him and I wonder if he "keeps score" in his head.  Not consciously, but this transactional mindset is wired in his brain.  We probably know or have known people (I have) who do this so it's not a necessarily a fundy thing, though the fundy belief system no doubt contributes to this thinking.

 

[nastyhobbitses]

Just now, nokidsmom said:

Just want to briefly jump back to this and comment that ITA on this.   I get that same vibe from him and I wonder if he "keeps score" in his head.  Not consciously, but this transactional mindset is wired in his brain.  We probably know or have known people (I have) who do this so it's not a necessarily a fundy thing, though the fundy belief system no doubt contributes to this thinking.

 

Oh, it definitely happens outside of fundie-dom (which is why I have to really assess whether or not I should let a guy buy me a drink because worst case scenario is that he has this transactional mindset and thinks I need to "pay him back" with sex), but I'm sure that a belief system that tells you that a woman's role is to do XYZ and the man provides as the breadwinner in exchange for XYZ doesn't exactly foster respect or sacrifice for your partner.

[JermajestyDuggar]

2 hours ago, BobTheWalrus said:

I kind of wish this kind of comment didn't happen. Some people just don't have a lot of money, but they still want to go and have a bit of time together, and I think it's insensitive to shame them for that.  If they were wealthy, and he was spending loads of money on himself but only taking his wife to cheap restaurants, that would be snarkworthy. But they don't strike me as having tons of spare cash to spend on fancy dinners. Or maybe they just don't enjoy the atmosphere in very formal restaurants.

I doubt they are so poor they can't afford a fast food date night. Plus he wrote LOL after it. I'm guessing he wasn't being that serious just as I was not. He has a job and they only have two kids. They are most likely living much better than Priscilla did growing up.

[Dandruff]

1 hour ago, nastyhobbitses said:

Oh, it definitely happens outside of fundie-dom (which is why I have to really assess whether or not I should let a guy buy me a drink because worst case scenario is that he has this transactional mindset and thinks I need to "pay him back" with sex), but I'm sure that a belief system that tells you that a woman's role is to do XYZ and the man provides as the breadwinner in exchange for XYZ doesn't exactly foster respect or sacrifice for your partner.

This brings back memories.  I once dated a young man who was very polite, we went on three dates, then he was all over me.  He thought three dates with him behaving as a perfect gentleman bought him sex.  We were in our late 20's and hadn't even kissed goodnight prior to that.  I pushed him off and made it very clear that we were done.  Thank goodness he went away.  There was no fundiedom involved whatsoever.

That said, I think David's mindset is just narrow ultra-fundie, with such limited social interaction with the outside world that he has no clue how typical relationships work.  I'm also not sure that he's terribly bright.  So I believe he thinks that if all roles and behavior are consistent with patriarchal/Gothard guidelines (as they've been trained to do), especially with regard to gender, then all should be well. 

I see him as fitting in perfectly, or perhaps adapting perfectly, with a messed-up system.  I don't think he sees Priscilla as any kind of equal, but I also don't think he would intentionally abuse or neglect her.  I hope there's some real warmth between them, but I don't see it.  As I said in an earlier post, I think he's fond of her, and sometimes frustrated with her, as he would be with a pet.

[JillyO]

4 hours ago, BobTheWalrus said:

I kind of wish this kind of comment didn't happen. Some people just don't have a lot of money, but they still want to go and have a bit of time together, and I think it's insensitive to shame them for that.  If they were wealthy, and he was spending loads of money on himself but only taking his wife to cheap restaurants, that would be snarkworthy. But they don't strike me as having tons of spare cash to spend on fancy dinners. Or maybe they just don't enjoy the atmosphere in very formal restaurants.

Far be it from me to shame anyone for not having a lot of money. However, buy-one-get-one burgers and fries at a fast food place by a big road still gets the side-eye from me when declared a "fun date night" (and I really don't think David and Cil are bad off financially). Frankly, a home-cooked pasta dish and a few candles would make a much better date night any time in my book, and would likely be cheaper too. YMMV, and that's okay.

[MsSaylor]

Maybe he meant splurge in a caloric sense instead of a money sense.  I think they are pretty health conscious and don't eat this kind of fast food all the time. Either way I think he was joking.