The Hodnett Family Converting Scotland

[Palimpsest]

18 minutes ago, formergothardite said:

"Landlord is possessed" is what Shrader used and that seemed appease his followers, perhaps Hodnutt can borrow it. 

Yes, that one was really excellent.  Much better than the missionary who went off on leave with the key to the hanger where the plane was one.  Why did none of John's humpers ever call him out properly over the disappearing plane?

[samurai_sarah]

33 minutes ago, Palimpsest said:

What the fuck has he done in Dundee so far except for eating fish and chips?

The less he does, the better the good people of Dundee are off for it. At least eating fish and chips supports the local economy!

[Palimpsest]

True, @samurai_sarah.  He's gone to a coffee shop too.  And I forgot that he'd done some street preaching.  

I just looked at the comments properly.  According to Ginger they are "needing" a house.  A leg-humper says: "oh ok. I thought the one you had posted pics of a few weeks back was permanent. Sorry. Must've missed a post. We will be praying."

No, sweetie.  You didn't miss a post.  Methinks that the first "new to us" house that needed paint and carpeting wasn't up to the standards the Hodnutts would like to be accustomed to.

[Gobsmacked]

8 hours ago, Howl said:

Would there be different visa requirements if they moved to Carlisle, or is a visa good for all of the UK?

 

VISA good for the uk. Scotland sadly hasn't gained independence yet. We are still working on it though!!

[Gobsmacked]

Jody posted on the Dundee house initially to say that it needed some work doing to it and that he isn't very good at carpentry if I remember correctly. (Can't be bothered to look all the way back sorry).

What was he expecting for very little money! A palace!!????

Scotland has a major housing crisis due to Thatcher selling off council built housing in the 1980s and not replacing them with a decent alternative. 

Rogue private landlords now rule the rental housing markets with very few rules and regulations in place to stop this.

The Hodnetts were lucky to have been given a roof over their heads when they "arrived" here to save us poor wee wicked pagan witchy worshipping Scots from whatever perceived evils that are attacking us.

Me thinks that the cruel wicked Scottish weather ( which hasn't arrived in full force yet) is already scaring the poor Hodnetts.

Also the good folk of Dundee aren't fools and will not be treated as such by folk who can't tell the difference between major Scottish cities.

I do feel sorry for the folk of Carlisle if The Hodnetts end up living there instead though.

[imokit]

Its one thing to explain a change of city to your church back home.  But how do you explain a different country?  Or do you just hope they don't notice?

[Gobsmacked]

I may have missed it but did The Hodnetts say where the new house is?

[Palimpsest]

1 minute ago, Gobsmacked said:

I may have missed it but did The Hodnetts say where the new house is?

Nope.  I was joking about it being in Carlisle.

[Gobsmacked]

Ooooo! So is it in Dundee or is Jody keeping us all on tenterhooks?

[Gobsmacked]

Jody's car died in a puff of black smoke yesterday. Leg humpers are giving lots of 'advice'.

The container is arriving today, so I'm presuming that the new house is In Dundee.

 

[FrumperedCat]

I wonder if the first house they were staying in was furnished because the furniture hadn't arrived from their container. They're moving on Saturday and the container arrives on Sunday so I guess they're moving house because they now need an unfurnished one with space for the furniture.

[Gobsmacked]

Possibly. In the video he filmed of their first night in the house after leaving the hotel, the eldest girl could be seen putting a sheet onto a blow up mattress.

[Palimpsest]

But why would Jody be whining about lacking carpentry skills and grifting for carpets if they knew that house was just temporary?  

His car died in a puff of black smoke?  These missionaries have the worst luck, or Satan strikes again.  I wonder if it was the timing belt?

 

 

[hoipolloi]

36 minutes ago, Palimpsest said:

These missionaries have the worst luck, or Satan strikes again.

Or maybe, you know, God Himself is sending a big fat message to these dolts.

[Gobsmacked]

One of the leghumpers suggested timing belt!.

The poor little car probably shook on its axle and took ten deep breaths each time  Jody climbed in. I'm not suprised that it  'retired' it's self. .

[JesusPony]

"PRAISE GOD!" Are they begging for a new car yet?

[Palimpsest]

5 minutes ago, Gobsmacked said:

One of the leghumpers suggested timing belt!.

The poor little car probably shook on its axle and took ten deep breaths each time  Jody climbed in. I'm not suprised that it  'retired' it's self. .

My car once died in a puff of smoke at 60 MPH.  I coasted to the side of the road jumped out of the car and ran like hell because I thought it was going to blow up.  It didn't, luckily.  It was very frightening to lose all power completely with no warning - just like that.

It was a cracked engine block and apparently a known fault in the car - a recall was in the process of being issued - so we got the engine rebuilt at no cost to us.

Whatever this is for Jody -  is it sounds expensive.  

I have to agree with @hoipolloi.  God works in mysterious ways!

[Lurky]

@hoipolloi Funny how when things go right, it's God rewarding them,, but when things go wrong, it's Satan fighting against them, but never, you know, an actual message from God!

It just seems so unsurprising that this kind of mission just goes wrong.  I am used to JRod, John Shrader etc, and new to following the grift-ssionaries, so I haven't seen any of the Jill Duggar/Hodnett style "everything's going wrong" ones - but logically, more of these 'missions' that struggle for funding in the first place, and don't have concrete plans, must end with early returns than not. 

Speaking of, I can't find an update from the Mauluccis in ages - last seen on their cash-raising tour in that second-hand Limo....   Anyone found any more?

 

[Gobsmacked]

Jody posted a photograph of a revolting greasy double bacon burger. Healthy eating doesn't seem to be his thing. 

His post appeared to come from Lockerbie. He seems to be travelling again.

[kunoichi66]

On 27/11/2016 at 3:32 PM, samurai_sarah said:

Because then they'd have had to be missionaries to England! Seriously though, my best guess is that they didn't think this through properly, before settling on Scotland and creating their grifting-site and video. Considering that they didn't even know about driving on the left side of the road, it seems like they just expected a romantic adventure, after seeing pictures of Scotland. They'll really be in for a surprise once it starts snowing seriously!

And I agree with you, Scotland has plenty of its own problems, and doesn't need missionaries who just preach. How about doing something useful like collecting money for the frail elderly, who may not be able to pay their heating-bills in winter? And checking up on them regularly to ensure that they have all they need/are still alive when snow turns them house-bound? (In case anyone wonders why *I* haven't started a scheme like that myself: I came up with the idea while typing.)

While I'm quite in love with my idea right now, I doubt that folk like the Hodnetts would find a scheme like that appealing. Not enough preaching and proselytising -although it would make good use of their grifting skills- too much hard work, and listening instead of talking at others. Then, it would also lack the "prestige" of "soul-winning", because no matter what they claim, the Hodnetts aren't in Scotland to serve the people, they're here in a vanity project!

Anyway, I'll also keep my eyes peeled.

@sea_gale: If you want to start an FJ Scotland meet-up, the easiest way to go about it would be to start a topic in AYTFJ. Or open a PM t-group. You can copy multiple recipients into the address bar of a single PM, and add more as needed. Hope this helps!

This this this!  People like the Hodnetts make me so angry, because there are so many problems and vulnerable people in Scotland that could use help (like the examples you gave).  But, you know, that would be work, and God forbid someone like Jody roll up his sleeves and get stuck in.

 

Heh.  He might actually get some respect if he did that, too.

 

Also...Carlisle?  Isn't Carlisle in England?  Why is he driving to England every single week?

I have so many questions!!!

[kunoichi66]

On 05/12/2016 at 2:07 AM, hoipolloi said:

Speaking of grit, this cracked me up the other day:

 

I like that Twitter user.  I like them a lot.

On 07/12/2016 at 0:47 PM, Palimpsest said:

And that, I'm afraid, is quite typical of IFB "missionaries."

I feel a limerick is coming on ...

There once was a mission'ry called Jody,

Whose knowledge of Scotland was grody.

He went to Dundee

To convert the Wee Free,

But to Carlisle he drives just to toady.

BRAVA!!!  ENCORE!!!! 

[Palimpsest]

2 hours ago, kunoichi66 said:

I like that Twitter user.  I like them a lot.

BRAVA!!!  ENCORE!!!! 

How about a Christmas carol?  

(My American husband says he's never heard of the Bird Carol, so there's a youtube link below with the original.)

From over the pond did a missionary fly,
Damn you.
He came to convert us and make us cry,
Damn you.
He ate, he chowed down, round he drove,
And we did ask "Fit ya sen cove?"*
Damn you, damn you, damn you.

The pastor decided on old Dundee,
Screw you.
He preached, and prayed, and had such a spree.
Screw you.
He showed his colours clear enough,
His plan was to convert all of us
Screw you, screw you, screw you.

The twerp then set sights on poor Carlisle,
Fuck you.
The English more likely to fall for his guile,
Fuck you.
'O you,' he mooed, ' you're much less alert,
I'm sure to find you easier to convert.'
Fuck you, fuck you, fuck you.

*What are you talking about, mate.

Sorry, I can't get it to cue to the right spot.  The Birds starts at the 11:40 mark.

 

[ViolaSebastian]

I fell down this rabbit hole yesterday and good Lord...but I noticed on the post where he is attempting to self-diagnosis himself with sleep apnea (which, not enough  in the world there, buddy...) that he is availing himself of Plexus to lose weight. Apparently he didn't have a sleep study and grifted his way to a new CPAP machine. I am not body snarking (in my heavier days I was on a CPAP machine too--non-grifted, though), but if he'd had a sleep study, the respiratory therapist probably would have told him that he's morbidly obese and desperately needed to lose some weight in order to be able to breathe at night. And that Plexus isn't going to help a bit if he keeps eating bacon sandwiches and fish and chips. 

[hoipolloi]

1 hour ago, Palimpsest said:

How about a Christmas carol?  

(My American husband says he's never heard of the Bird Carol, so there's a youtube link below with the original.)

From over the pond did a missionary fly,
Damn you.
He came to convert us and make us cry,
Damn you.
He ate, he chowed down, round he drove,
And we did ask "Fit ya sen cove?"*
Damn you, damn you, damn you.

The pastor decided on old Dundee,
Screw you.
He preached, and prayed, and had such a spree.
Screw you.
He showed his colours clear enough,
His plan was to convert all of us
Screw you, screw you, screw you.

The twerp then set sights on poor Carlisle,
Fuck you.
The English more likely to fall for his guile,
Fuck you.
'O you,' he mooed, ' you're much less alert,
I'm sure to find you easier to convert.'
Fuck you, fuck you, fuck you.

*What are you talking about, mate.

Sorry, I can't get it to cue to the right spot.  The Birds starts at the 11:40 mark.

 

Brilliant! This is definitely in the top 5 of "Wins Internet, Christmas Edition"

[Peas n carrots]

Lockerbie would be on the way to/from Carlisle.

Scottish cuisine isn't exactly known for fresh healthy options, but damn I can find ways to be reasonably healthy and not eat a burger a day.

I wonder if he has discovered fried pizza yet?

Btw - I've read southern cuisine derived from the food the Scots Irish brought to America. No wonder he is digging his rounds of the best chippys in Scotland!