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Iamhispurity

M Is For Mama - making quiverfull look modern

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Tired
Iamhispurity

I stumbled across her blog some time ago.  At first she looked like a normal, evangelical mum with lots of kids. After some time, I realized that she subscribes to the quiverfull ideology. She is dressed pretty modern, homeschools and seems pretty normal. There isn't a lot of fundiegelical talk as well. But still, she is quiverfull, talks about child training, homeschools... On the other hand, her blog is posh, loads of DIY, fashion, travel. So a modern quiverfull mom?

I did not find a thread on her, so I decided I should create my own.

http://misformama.net/

http://misformama.net/2012/10/q-with-five-days5-ways.html 

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Howl

Reminds me of the Mormon mom fashion bloggers that have been discussed here -- beautiful home design, beautiful clothes, beautiful kids, beautiful women with lots of kids.   Oh, and husbands who are good providers.  These women all look to be twenty-something or early 30s. 

The second post in The LDS/Mormon Fashion Bloggers thread has links to 5 of these sites. 

http://www.freejinger.org/topic/26715-ldsmormon-fashion-bloggers/#comment-1175758

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Wine time!
ophelia

I've been reading her blog for quite a while now. At first I had the exact same thought, but then I realized that she was no better than all the other fundies we snark on. If I remember correctly she had a really harsh blog post about abortion or same-sex-marriage.

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JermajestyDuggar

It looks just like many other mommy blogs all over the web. A mommy claiming all these relatable things like a messy house, sleepless nights, penny pinching, etc. But all the pics are filled with crafty cute creations, perfectly coiffed children, and mom with her hair and makeup done. 

Its all just one big humble brag. 

Edited by JermajestyDuggar
Unfortunate but hilarious misspelling

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Pravda_Iskra

She doesn't realize how lucky she is, I guess, compared to other quiverfull fundies out there. Don't see a lot of them (or any of them) wearing J. Crew. Even if it's factory, their stuff is expensive. Looks like her husband has a real job too. The lifestyle may work for her, but it's because she and her husband are more educated and better off than most of the others we see preaching quiverfull. They can provide for that many kids, but a lot of people can't. 

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Petrel
10 minutes ago, JermajestyDuggar said:

But all the pics are filled with crafty cute creations, perfectly quaffed children, and mom with her hair and makeup done. 

Sorry, I got the giggles.  It's coiffed, quaffing is drinking.  Please don't drink the children.  

I notice she posted something about the Dallas shooting and how sad it was but the Orlando night club shooting wasn't even on her radar.  She got some nice pictures of herself in artistically torn jeans and a flowy shirt the next day, though.  

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JermajestyDuggar
Just now, Petrel said:

Sorry, I got the giggles.  It's coiffed, quaffing is drinking.  Please don't drink the children.  

I notice she posted something about the Dallas shooting and how sad it was but the Orlando night club shooting wasn't even on her radar.  She got some nice pictures of herself in artistically torn jeans and a flowy shirt the next day, though.  

Hahaha! Thanks! I'll go change it! 

PSA: don't drink your children! Even if they are dressed adorably!

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Meh
refugee

We had some of these at our old church. Energetic, cheerful, fashionable young ladies (cute, not frumpy) who grew up and married and are now fashionably having a baby every other year while blogging and Pinteresting and running an Etsy store and still looking (at least in the pictures) cute and perky and like they have it all together.

They're out there, for sure, promoting with grace and glitz a poisonous mindset and worldview. Even though they do it well, they're of the mistaken impression that because they're managing, everybody should be able to. And everybody should, anyway, because it's the biblical way to live.

IM-rather-jaded-O it's all about appearances with that crowd.

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onlyme

Fashion shots remind me of Lisa Pennington. What is that? I mean, do we really need all these photos of you in an ordinary tank top you picked up at Goodwill? Get dressed and run to the store already. Whhhhhyyyyyyy??????? 

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December

I've not really run across any mommy bloggers (or other lifestyle, cooking, etc. bloggers) who acknowledge that they're being bankrolled by their spouse and/or family. It seems very disingenuous to me. While a few of them may be supporting themselves and their families by a blog, most aren't. And those who are didn't start turning huge profits from Day 1. I'd find these sort of blogs a lot more relatable if they actually were honest about the circumstances that allow them to devote so much time to blogging, photography, etc. instead of just claiming it's due some MLM scheme or something. But as @JermajestyDuggar rightly pointed out, these blogs are often one big humblebrag and keeping up appearances is the #1 goal.

I also can't stand when I start reading a new blog, and a few entries in I start to realize that at it's core it's really a ministry/evangelizing blog under the guise of another topic (diet, exercise, home decor, etc.). I get that the mission is to shoehorn in the religious spiels after drawing people in with interesting secular content, but I'm not personally responsive to that sort of bait 'n' switch approach! ;) 

The M is for Mama blog seems rather interesting. It's definitely got a different vibe than the other Quiverfull blogs, which I assume is on purpose. Though that first picture on her about page reminds me of Michelle Duggar (maybe not fair, it's obviously a "silly face" picture).

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slickcat79

She reminds me of LoraLynn. I read this entry:

http://misformama.net/2012/01/try-it-tuesday-how-to-build-house-from.html

I give them a lot of credit for the work they put in, but damn if it's not dripping with privilege. At the ages of +/- 19 and 22, they bought an 1800 sq ft house that was a perfect "starter home". When they wanted to sell it, they did, and moved into her parents' second floor apartment area to live rent free for a year. Her husband apparently has tech-y skills as well as building skills, and they were able to get most of the labor free from him and his father and barter for the rest. Even so, they managed to shell out $100,000 cash over the course of a year to build their own house. It's a pretty damn lucky 26yo SAH/QF mom who has the means for that. 

And yet, here I am at the ripe old age of 29, and I’ve now lived in my very own from scratch, 95% DIYed, cash-bought dream home for 2 1/2 years.

*beam*

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Spent
ViolaSebastian
Quote

Abbie–take care of kids, including a 2 year-old who voluntarily constipated himself to avoid using the potty for an. entire. year (best.year.ever)

I despise this sort of overshare and thank my lucky stars that I made it through my childhood before all the world could know about one's voluntarily constipation.

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Red Hair, Black Dress

Yes seems normal at first until you read her About section.  She calls her husband an "amazing renaissance man who has been known to do things like build our entire house from scratch with his own bare, manly hands", (emphasis mine). 

I mean well, yes they of course they are manly hands because he's a man -- but I know what she means -- that he's a "real" man.  Which seems to be a big deal in fundie land.

But what does a real man look like?   What --  really-- do "manly" hands look like? 

My daddy, all of 5'8" 145 lbs soaking wet, had thin hands, bony without an extra smidge of flesh on them, thin fingers and knobby knuckles. They were well cared for.  They were also incredibly strong.  He had "manly" hands.  My brother, very like my father at 165 lbs and taller has the same "manly" hands,  Mr Black Dress and my BIL, both different physically and with different hands,  also have manly hands.

My rambling point is that this emphasis on "manly" in fundie world is nuts, because they have such a narrow definition of what manly is, does, and looks like.  They want to everyone to fit neatly into a little box labeled  "Manly" and "Womanly" depending on gender.  And heaven help you if you don't conform to their manly/ womanly definitions.

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Petrel

Does it make you less manly if you build the house wearing work gloves? 

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Rhetorica

This thread has made my day! I've been following her blog for quite a while, and, yes, she is living a charmed life and quite blind to all the privilege she enjoys. In addition to everything listed so far, she homeschools the kids, but only a couple days a week, the other 2-3 days her mother is doing the homeschooling. Their parents live nearby and are forever taking care of the kids while she and her husband go off on these awesome trips to Paris and Vancouver. When you have so much support to help you, five (plus) kids are do-able. What upsets me, though, is that her overall story implies that anyone else could have the same life if they just made the smart choices she makes. Also, she only has one sibling, so it's not as though she grew up sharing resources with a ton of siblings, although she was homeschooled. I have to wonder if she and her husband are more conservative than her parents are? (Although she does talk about wearing frumpers as a kid.)

But what really gets me is that she can "do" all these things and still look as fit and fashion-forward as a 19-year-old. She led workout classes at the Y all through her pregnancy with twins and then snapped right back into shape afterward. All the while, other homeschool slobs like me raised their younger siblings, got to college way behind schedule, had their kids later too, and now at the age of 40 are overweight and still getting established in our careers. We're too tired to blog. Blech. 

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JemimaPuddle-Duck

Sometimes the fundi-mom homeschool blogs (even regular Facebook posters) really get under my skin. I think they (unintentionally or not) put a lot of pressure on the young wives. Another FJer mentioned feeling inadequate when looking at Kelly Bradrick's IG but still acknowledged that she is honest about her day-to-day struggles. Sorry, I'm just ramble-thinking out loud. I complain to my husband about the blogs that show how you can do everything if you do it just like the blogger and he says I should start a blog to tell all the other young Christian moms that you can't do everything and that's okay. Smart man. ;-)

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erunerune

Give Olivia Howard 10 years and she will be this lady. Although fundies have hardly cornered the virtual market on humble-bragging pretty people.

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JermajestyDuggar

I just roll my eyes at facebook, mom blogs, Pinterest, and any other social media that has given braggarts an easy stage to show off on. I am not on FB like I used to be. So much of it is just as fake as these mommy bloggers. I keep it pretty real on my FB without airing my dirty laundry but I'm starting to drift away. I'm tired of rolling my eyes every time I check my feed. 

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Meh
backyard sylph

I was hopeful with this one, as it fits in my favorite category of blogging hilarity, but I just cannot bear the parentheses parade.

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SparkleMomma

I'm a young mom myself and the humblebrags kill me sometimes. Just stahhhp. Please. Also does anyone know where in East Texas she is, that's my neck of the woods! This modern modest quiverfull seems like a really sneaky way to draw in new cult members. She looks like she "has it all" so why not want to join in. Those frumpers really didn't do a lot for the movement.

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Four is Enough

Does anyone else keep reading this as "mis INFORMED mama?"

I thought she was being sarcastic or something, until the comments showed me..

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JermajestyDuggar
1 hour ago, SparkleMomma said:

I'm a young mom myself and the humblebrags kill me sometimes. Just stahhhp. Please. Also does anyone know where in East Texas she is, that's my neck of the woods! This modern modest quiverfull seems like a really sneaky way to draw in new cult members. She looks like she "has it all" so why not want to join in. Those frumpers really didn't do a lot for the movement.

I would bet good money those frumpers drew some families in back in the 90s. Floral print dresses were in style for awhile in the 90s so it wasn't super far from a standard style. And people were drawn in by thinking.... How quaint! How sweet! How wholesome! Unfortunately some probably wanted to go back in time to a "better way of life." Little did they know that little house on the prairie is not completely autobiographical and pa was kind of a fuck up. 

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libriatrix

I just went on a binge through all her home decor posts as I find her style attractive (while way more cluttered and colorful than I would do in my own home). But boy am I glad I don't feel an urge to keep up with her, because that would be really disheartening. 

Is anyone else amused by her "Thrifted or Grifted" feature, wherein she uses 'grifted' to mean 'bought full-price'? Definitely not the FJ usage.

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THERetroGamerNY

Was reading that About section... Clicked on the "31 Things About Me" and got a "page not found"... Then clicked on some other random link and got one of those GAWD-AWFUL poasts where the blogger centers everything.

Cannot STAND that. Makes me want to grab a weapon and join a revolution of some sort...

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