What is going on with these marathon length births??

[desertvixen]

The only bad thing about the short labor was the tearing.  I had initially told the doctor (and since I was delivering with an Army doc in a training hospital - Fort Gordon had no L/D ward in 2006) that I did not want an episiotomy and I did want an epidural.

The guy was pretty good about respecting my wishes, especially since we'd just met, but when he advised that I had the episiotomy because I was about to tear, and I agreed, he cut DEEP.  Too deep, IMO.  45 minutes to stitch me up afterwards.

[Coconut Flan]

As my "down there" plastic surgeon told me tears heal better than cuts and less painfully.  In my case he was certainly right as the episiotomy never healed properly and the tear quit hurting in four or five days.  Although it took about ten times as long to sew up the tear as the cut.  It takes more time, patience, and skill. 

[desertvixen]

17 minutes ago, Coconut Flan said:

As my "down there" plastic surgeon told me tears heal better than cuts and less painfully.  In my case he was certainly right as the episiotomy never healed properly and the tear quit hurting in four or five days.  Although it took about ten times as long to sew up the tear as the cut.  It takes more time, patience, and skill. 

Considering this guy took 45 minutes to stitch the cut, I can't imagine him doing the tear.  It healed okay but that was the reason I ended up buying a second Boppy.

[JermajestyDuggar]

My tear healed much faster and better than my cut. Down with episiotomies! 

[DaisyD]

My mom's doc cut her almost all the way back when she had me. As a result,  I was SEVERLY against an episiotomy. I would have a c-section before an episiotomy. I only ended up needing a couple of stitches for the boy's giant (98th percentile) head and no pain relief for it so I'm all for tearing over cutting. I don't even remember if I needed stitches the second time. Episiotomies are the devil.

[desertvixen]

Oh believe me, if I ever have the experience I again (I would like to have another child, despite the MiniVixen being 10 here soon) I'm going to opt for tearing.

[PennySycamore]

I had a "wet tap" when I had an epidural with Katherine. I was okay at first but I went home 4 days after the birth with the worst headache ever.  I've been told that a blood patch can be helpful if you should develop an epidural headache

@PsyD2013,   No mother should ever have to lose a child. 

[Rebelwife]

20 hours ago, JermajestyDuggar said:

Extremely fast labors are terrifying and much more painful. I wouldn't wish it on my worst enemy. 

My second labor was less than three hours, from my first contraction (which put me on my knees) until my daughter was born.  It actually was a planned home birth and I'm glad because I don't know how I would have made it to the hospital; the contractions were immediately less than 2 minutes apart.  It was like being hit by a freight train that didn't stop quite honestly and I never once felt like I had a chance to even catch my breath - a little scary and I can't imagine what it would have been like if that had been my first.

[nastyhobbitses]

16 hours ago, December said:

Agreed. If they believe their entire purpose on this planet is to have babies (and lots and lots of them), it makes sense they would want to emphasize the amount of work/effort that went into giving birth to the children. 

Also, with the emphasis on leaving the family size up to God, I think letting their labor be (potentially unnecessarily) long and painful might be more evidence that they truly are leaving it up to God. Which would also explain why they had to wait for the husband to be moved by God to go to a hospital for intervention, etc. 

I also notice that occasionally, they'll bring up how long labor took when writing birthday greetings to their children. Isn't that a bit like saying "look how much suffering you inflicted upon me, you little shit. Happy birthday"? I know my mom likes to jokingly theorize that my procrastination problems started at birth (head up by her ribcage, was absolutely not going to come out safely and on time without surgical intervention), but she doesn't write "X years ago today the doctors tore you from my nether regions, happy birthday NastyHobbitses" when she writes her little Facebook birthday messages to me.

[LilMissMetaphor]

On 7/10/2016 at 9:20 AM, fundiefan said:

 Shunning it all for some idealized reason just seems dangerous to me. Of course, if that's what you choose, more power to you and I would never say it's wrong.

 

I would say it's wrong.  But I'm very anti-pain.  Pain is wrong.  If it hurts, you're doing it wrong.  WRONG WRONG WRONG.  

[polecat]

10 hours ago, JermajestyDuggar said:

My tear healed much faster and better than my cut. Down with episiotomies! 

Do they no longer do the perineal massage? 

 

Again, I've only actually done the labor/push thing once, but they did the perineal massage (although "massage" should be used loosely since it felt more like they were stretching everything out with hands and feet and anything else they could get in there, lol) so that I wouldn't tear or "need" a cut. 

[Wenny]

14 minutes ago, polecat said:

Do they no longer do the perineal massage? 

 

Again, I've only actually done the labor/push thing once, but they did the perineal massage (although "massage" should be used loosely since it felt more like they were stretching everything out with hands and feet and anything else they could get in there, lol) so that I wouldn't tear or "need" a cut. 

I've only met one person who had a massage and that was by a student midwife. I had a epi and hated it, felt like I was drowning and no one believed me. 

[DaisyD]

I know my OB did the massage with my second (I tried give her the oil I had brought for it and she said I was stretching fine and she didn't need it). I think they did it with my first too. It's more like massage is (very slowly) taking the place of episiotomy. I haven't heard of anyone getting cut around here in a long time. When my mom was having babies it was much more common. So common that she just assumed I had had one and was very impressed at how well I was getting around after. 

[PennySycamore]

@daisyd681, it used to be that episiotomies were done on most every woman who gave birth in the US.  I don't know what the rate is now. but it has dropped.  I had three c-sections and two VBACs with no cutting that I know of.  I know I wasn't cut during my last birth (tore badly though) but I'm not  entirely sure about my first VBAC.  My OB had to use high forceps to get her out because her heart rate was dropping precipitously and Katherine needed immediate resuscitation.   So I don't know if the doc did a quick cut or not.  The pain was excruciating and Dr Howard later apologized to me for the pain.  Dr Howard is the gentlest OB/GYN I've ever met.

[Grimalkin]

All four of my births and labors were so incredibly different. The second being the quickest and easiest. Two pushes and done. My fourth was a C-section because of his size and my other two labors being so difficult (I don't want to go Ito the awful details, but they were rough) I would avoid a c-section if possible the recovery is rough and I think I had it easy except I ripped my stitches a bit when my oldest went on a bike ride and went 'missing' I panicked with the other three in tow looking for her. She was at a friends house.

         Also if you happen to find yourself itchy all over for no reason and it happens a few days in a row call your doctor. I was embarrassed to bother them with "I'm insanely itchy all over including hands and feet." Any weird symptoms no matter how silly they seem are worth a call to ask.

[Melissa1977]

On 10/7/2016 at 7:43 PM, Dandruff said:

Who knows what some of these fundie moms would choose if they weren't in total submission to their husbands.  I think the biblical statement that women's pain in labor would be increased is often taken as a directive to not allow pain relief.  Priscilla Waller's video about her 26 hour home labor with 10+ lb, first child, Paul had me staring at the screen bug-eyed.  In contrast, and apparently an exception, was Whitney Bates' hospital birth of Bradley with epidural.  I'm guessing the same was done for Kaci.  IIRC, Zach didn't want to see her suffering unnecessarily (I hope his parents weren't trying to discourage it).  Such a normal caring reaction from a husband...and I'm sure it invited some criticism.

Althrough Kelly Bates had a lot of homebirths, both Whit and Erin had choosen other way. Erin needed hospital for sure, but she said she wanted epidural (I think she couldn't for medical reasons, but she planned not to suffer). I don't know if Alyssa went to a hospital. But any of them talked as if a homebirth was godlier than an hospital birth. 

[Dandruff]

Maybe some of the opposition to hospital/medicated births is about money?  Both Whitney and Erin (who wanted an epidural but didn't get one) were filmed in the hospital, so there were UPTV $$s.  I still think Zach, and probably Chad, would have willingly paid for it themselves - assuming Erin didn't have the medical issues - but what if their finances were really tight?  I expect some fundie families would avoid hospital births because they plan on umpteen children and only want to pay for a hospital if they have to.

[Coconut Flan]

36 minutes ago, Melissa1977 said:

I don't know if Alyssa went to a hospital.

Alyssa said she was going to use a birthing center and based on the photos that's what they did.

[polecat]

4 hours ago, Wenny said:

I've only met one person who had a massage and that was by a student midwife. I had a epi and hated it, felt like I was drowning and no one believed me. 

 

It sounds like it was placed incorrectly. I'm sorry no one believed you. I have a friend who had this happen. She felt like she couldn't breathe, and it was because they placed it too high.

[Melissa1977]

About birth lenght, I think fundies count since the first contraction. So 72 can be true. 

With my first I laboured 14 hours in the hospital, but I had been 2 days with contractions at home (they were soft and slow so hospital was no needed then). 

I have had a natural birth and an epidural birth. Natural is painful, but is more beautiful and feelings are so special. With epidural delivery is colder, but you don't suffer. It's difficult to say which was better.

[justwatching]

On ‎7‎/‎11‎/‎2016 at 8:25 PM, desertvixen said:

Considering this guy took 45 minutes to stitch the cut, I can't imagine him doing the tear.  It healed okay but that was the reason I ended up buying a second Boppy.

My nurse broke a rule and got me a donut pillow before I left.  She said I would thank her later. 

[Chocolatedefrauded]

I love birth stories. It is amazing that women grow babies so nicely & manage to get them out safely. There are so many different ways to give birth. I don't like the contests of "I gave birth better than you did" that some women play. (Not here)

My water broke but I didn't go into labor so about 20 hours later, they gave me pitocin. Labor was hard & fast. I didn't get an epidural. When they gave me a painkiller (Stadal or something) it did not help the pain. Just made me so spacey that I didn't know who the guy holding my hand was. When they were counting as I pushed, he was a slow counter so I told him to shut up. Only one person should count!

What do they call that labor period when you decide, nah, I don't want to do this? Transitition maybe? I was planning to walk out the hospital door, cause that would stop the contractions, you know?

My baby's head got stuck after 2 1/2 hours of pushing & I was so glad to get a c-section. It was scary & fast. But the result was amazing!