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Daniel Staddon and Kathryn Neely: the most convoluted courtship story ever


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46 minutes ago, GreyhoundFan said:

I want to say thank you for bringing this to FJ's attention. I had a singularly bad day and needed a laugh. I sure got them, lots of them, while reading that dreck. They both sound like they are 12 years old. I don't normally comment on looks, but she is pretty. Too bad she'll be knocked up for the next 20 or so years and chasing after an increasingly large brood of yard apes. I can't imagine getting engaged to a guy I've spoken with only a few times. <shudder>. And the crap about the "rare" princess-cut diamond. Um, at least 10 people I know have princess cut diamonds. Of course, I get out in the world and speak to people who aren't in a cult, so I have a leg up on Danny-boy. I wonder if they will be heading to Big Sandy too?

I have a princess cut diamond. I was surprised to learn they were so incredibly rare. They were actually quite abundant in the stores when we were ring shopping and pretty popular around that time. Today is my 7th anniversary; we bought the ring in the late summer of 2008. 

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7 minutes ago, louisa05 said:

I have a princess cut diamond. I was surprised to learn they were so incredibly rare. They were actually quite abundant in the stores when we were ring shopping and pretty popular around that time. Today is my 7th anniversary; we bought the ring in the late summer of 2008. 

Happy anniversary!  I was married in 2008 and also remember them being quite popular. 

Edited by mallallory
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Wow this is stupid!

 

On diamonds:

 

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1 hour ago, catlady said:

Oh my god, did he really say that?  Of all the what-the-fuckery I've read here, that's at the top of the list.  

Well Mr Staddon, by your philosophy, my husband must have a flawed bride--my diamond was flawed, and it ultimately fell out of the ring.  But 20+ years later, here we are.  Fuck you, Daniel Staddon.  I hope Ms. Neely wakes up and leaves you at the altar.

Ha! No, he didn't say that. It felt a little like he was implying that though. Or maybe that men who bought diamonds that weren't 100% flawless weren't all that into their ladies. It was just an all around douchey, pretentious, humble-brag of a paragraph.

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1 hour ago, JermajestyDuggar said:

6) and if Kathryn did have some reservations it was most likely the fact that in the non fundie world, she's gorgeous and way out of his league.

Re: bolded. They won't be the first fundie couple who is, uh, mis-matched in that way.

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4 hours ago, Petrel said:

Iirc the KJV uses LORD in the Old Testament for Yahweh.  Fundies use it so we'll know they're talking about God and not some other deity that his followers happen to call Lord.  Because that happens so often. 

This reminded me of something that's bothered me since I first heard about LORD/Yahweh at church eons ago.

Why isn't the "the" capitalized, as in THE LORD? Otherwise we get "the Yahweh," which, of course, sounds stupid. 

Internal inconsistencies make me twitchy, especially by those who claim to have a form of perfect knowledge.

As for the rest of this, in case I haven't gone public before, I formally renounce my former renunciation of feminism, and humbly beg readmittance to the real world.

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48 minutes ago, hoipolloi said:

Re: bolded. They won't be the first fundie couple who is, uh, mis-matched in that way.

This system is basically designed to force women to settle for the first guy who impresses dad, so it's not too surprising. These people remind me of the men's rights guys who act like the biggest catastrophe in the whole world is getting rejected by a woman. Seriously, it's like a Rube Goldberg machine for protecting the male ego. Trap the girls at home to agonize about the fact that they are powerless to pursue the one acceptable goal they've been given in life, and when some dweeb comes along they'll feel lIke they won the lottery.

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My engagement ring rock has flaws in it to match my pre-marital sexing, flawed soul. I got engaged in 2005 and the most common cut then was a princess too.

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10 hours ago, Petrel said:

Iirc the KJV uses LORD in the Old Testament for Yahweh.  Fundies use it so we'll know they're talking about God and not some other deity that his followers happen to call Lord.  Because that happens so often. 

Lord Vishnu? Lorde?

Speaking of which, I just want to add an E to every all-caps LORD, just so I can imagine Lorde the slightly edgy Kiwi pop star telling fundies what to do and how to conduct their courtships. Or that "delighting in the LORDE" just means putting on a Spotify playlist full of EDM-influenced pop and indie.

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12 hours ago, Kira said:

Like I said in the "Dillard" thread, I never believe fundie courtship stories. Every single courtship story is the same. The courtship stories have to be godly, they just cant say they like each other.

1 . I don't believe Daniel and Kathryn didn't communicate before their courtship.

2.. Look up Dorothy Morton and Noah Sanders' courtship story. They were clearly not telling the truth about their relationship( There families  are very close, yet they wanted us to believe Noah and Dorothy never had a conversation prior to their courtship)

I have my doubts about that to. But I can somehow see that they really monitor the boy-girl-interactions very closely. So if it rellay happened that way it is just another proof how fucked up the Mortons really are.

11 hours ago, Geechee Girl said:

They're a photogenic couple. Any idea on her chosen colors?

They look really cute together. I love her hair and some of her beauty really "helps" Daniel to look less awkward and Staddon-ish. I have the impression they have some kind of connection which would be good for them. Otherwise life must be so dreadful.

8 hours ago, JermajestyDuggar said:

Omg so many thoughts I can't type fast enough! 

1) I love how they had a questionaire to fill out and they were AMAZED at how similar their beliefs were. Of course they are! You're in the same fucking cult you morons! Your parents drilled the cheat sheet into brains since birth. 

2) was she humble bragging about the other dude interested in her? I think so. And I hate myself for being insanely curious as to who the other dude was. 

3) does this courtshit nonsense really guard your heart Daniel? Weren't you a wee bit hurt when Kathryn went MIA for a few months? Well, I'm sure it was only your frail headship ego that was hurt. But still.

4) I think all good fundie girls are supposed to play "hard to get." Otherwise you're a whore. Duh. I'm sure that was her little issue. 

5) I almost pissed my pants when he went on and on about his spectacular ring. Compensating for anything Daniel?

6) and if Kathryn did have some reservations it was most likely the fact that in the non fundie world, she's gorgeous and way out of his league. There I said it. I'm not proud but come on. She's out of his league.

Those are all of my thoughts for now. Thank you so much for posting this. The amount of navel gazing by these two provided many much needed laughs. 

1) this made me choke on my green tea. How stupid can you possibly be?? Aren't they aware that they were all brought up in the exact same way. With the same wisdom booklets and so on??

2) I'd love to know who the other guy was and if he lost pieces of his heart.

 

I just checked their blog - sweet jesus, they are way more daughters to marry off. I wonder if the parents will allow that level of "drama" to all their girls.

Edited by ophelia
to add the last sentences.
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8 hours ago, EmiGirl said:

Something tells me these people would love to go to Vaughan ohlmans conference. 

Nope. Wrong theology. Wrong brand of fundie.

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3 minutes ago, nelliebelle1197 said:

Nope. Wrong theology. Wrong brand of fundie.

I find it really hard to keep all this different branches of fundamentalism apart and to tell which family belongs to which theology.

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3 minutes ago, ophelia said:

I find it really hard to keep all this different branches of fundamentalism apart and to tell which family belongs to which theology.

I don't but I come from a wide variety of theologies, so it is probably more natural for me. If you haven't had experience with people who think a slight variation in how you get saved or think about a minute theological point sends you to hell, then I can see why it would be confusing. Wish I could help but I am not sure the  best way to organize- we need someone to put together a chart!

Edited by nelliebelle1197
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5 minutes ago, nelliebelle1197 said:

Wish I could help but I am not sure the  best way to organize- we need someone to put together a chart!

We had that discussion on the Vaughn Ohlson thread too.  I've tried before (the famous venn diagram from hell that I ditched) and am supposed to be trying again.  Sometime.  I'm not sure when I'll get it done.  Bottom line - it is bloody complicated and I'm persnickety and rather obsessive about weeding out those incredibly "important" doctrinal differences. 

Send help - and ferrets.  Or volunteer to take the project off my hands.   :my_dodgy:

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11 minutes ago, nelliebelle1197 said:

I don't but I come from a wide variety of theologies, so it is probably more natural for me. If you haven't had experience with people who think a slight variation in how you get saved or think about a minute theological point sends you to hell, then I can see why it would be confusing. Wish I could help but I am not sure the  best way to organize- we need someone to put together a chart!

I have to admit that I'm a theology student in my third semester, but we mostly study the big protestant traditions (Lutherans and Calvinism) since there aren't as many denominations in Germany as there are in the US.

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29 minutes ago, ophelia said:

I have to admit that I'm a theology student in my third semester, but we mostly study the big protestant traditions (Lutherans and Calvinism) since there aren't as many denominations in Germany as there are in the US.

The doctrinal pickiness amongst US protestant denominations is inSANE. IFB church on Main Street will have nothing to with IFB church on 1st street because one church is homeschool and family integrated and the other church has it own super conservative Christian school and sends kids to the nursery. Southern Baptist Church A and B won't cooperate on anything because Pastor A thinks Pastor B should not have been ordained since B is a woman. Methodist Church 1 has a huge rift with Methodist Church 2 because Church 2 has a huge gay congregation. ... blah blahblahblah  BLAH.

Edited by nelliebelle1197
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16 minutes ago, nelliebelle1197 said:

The doctrinal pickiness amongst US protestant denominations is inSANE. IFB church on Main Street will have nothing to with IFB church on 1st street because one church is homeschool and family integrated and the other church has it own super conservative Christian school and sends kids to the nursery. Southern Baptist Church A and B won't cooperate on anything because Pastor A thinks Pastor B should not have been ordained since B is a woman. Methodist Church 1 has a huge rift with Methodist Church 2 because Church 2 has a huge gay congregation. ... blah blahblahblah  BLAH.

That is exactly the impression that I have about US protestant christianity. But thank you for the great examples.

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Just imagine Kathryn meeting Daniel at some college keg party. She wouldn't give him the time of day. 

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10 hours ago, CyborgKin said:

Wow this is stupid!

 

On diamonds:

 

Love this satire. 

If I had to do this over, I'd go cubic zirconia. Looks just as good, and as "Roger" points out, cubic zirconia is way cheap.  Love my little diamond solitaire that hubby picked out, though. 

Edited by Howl
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Stuff like this makes me feel old and jaded.

Or maybe it's because I was drunk when I met my husband and I didn't consult my imaginary friend to see if I should marry him.

Jaded, I tell ya.  

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14 hours ago, refugee said:

It makes me sad. Some time after we left our former church, we were invited to a wedding. You'd think we could have sat through a wedding, for goodness sake, but no. We got all dressed up and ready to go and then while driving on our way, we stopped off for coffee... and just stayed. People don't like self-diagnosis, but my anxiety was through the roof and I had some of the feelings our teens (actually diagnosed with PTSD) have described in a panic attack.

What the ever-lovin' F??? How can people/lifestyle/social group hurt you so bad, you have a panic attack/PTSD symptoms a year later at the prospect of seeing them again?

 

 

 

Reminds me of the day we got the family ready for church as always. We walked out, looked at the building and I just couldn't face it, all the expectations. We quickly grabbed a cab, drove to a forest and spend some very relaxed hours. Afterwards of course people called us to ask if we were 'ok'. When we moved shortly after,  we took the opportunity to go to a different church where we were mostly happily ignored. 

Some of us find playing the good and obedient Christian role extremely hard. Especially when shit goes down which is swept under the carpet. It really eats you up. I have been at the brink of loosing it over that, so your story is not surprising. Hope the happy couple didn't take offence at your absence and you have found a healthy church.

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17 hours ago, usedbicycle said:

Daniel Staddon and Kathryn Neely are engaged and tell their loooong story on their new website

Both parties spent a whole year trying to figure out if they were meant for each other BEFORE SPEAKING EVEN ONCE!

 

Hello, this is the LORD speaking. My beloved children, why on earth do you think that I created you guys with mouths and ears and brains capable of processing speech? So you can TALK to each other....

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No way she didn't read that email. . . Liar, liar, dress on fire. . . There are several other sisters of marriageable age yet she ASSUMES Daddy could only be emailing Daniel about HER. Don't think so or at least I would hope she really doesn't have an ego that big. She read her own name inside the email.

 

She writes: "On January 8, 2015, I accidently found an email that would eventually change my life. While doing some communications work for the family on a trip down to south Georgia, I checked the “sent mail” folder to be sure the email had gone through, only to suddenly see an email from Dad to Daniel Staddon. Without reading it, I knew… and oh the feelings that swept over me during the next several hours of the trip! Shock, immense gratitude, complete bewilderment… We had known the Staddon family for nearly seven years, and the LORD had drawn our families closer and closer together through ministering side-by-side at the FEW Conferences; but up until that point, never once had Daniel crossed my mind as a possibility. I personally did not feel like I knew him very well (during many of our visits/conferences with the Staddons early on, he was already in Chicago working at the IBLP Headquarters), yet I knew enough to hold a deep respect and admiration for him. WHY would a man like him, who knows the LORD on such a personal, intimate level, and whose knowledge of the Word is so extensive and encompassing, pursue ME?!

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