Lesbian Grows Hair Out and Marries a Guy-Emily Thomes

[jerkit]

10 minutes ago, EowynW said:

Just stepping in as a trainer with 16 + years of personal and competitive experience. Crates are not bad. They are a tool, and a very useful one. They provide a safe spot for the dog on the road and in the home or a variety of reasons. Yea, I would say it sounds like in this situation she's abusing the tool instead of actually training the dog (sigh) but that isn't how most of us use them and they are certainly not evil cages. My dogs often walk into theirs for naps with the doors open. 

I totally agree. Crates absolutely have their place! It's the time in the crate that bothers me.

[seraaa]

That quote @habert posted....yikes.

I don't know what to say. I understand, a little, because I, too have experienced being beholden to negative beliefs about myself which didn't serve me. It takes effort to challenge and reshape such beliefs. I hope she can, in whatever way, find a way to feeling less miserable and guilty. 

[jerkit]

And yeah, the dog we dog sit for loves to take naps in his "house." 

[seraaa]

On 10/1/2016 at 10:11 PM, Rachel333 said:

Contrary to my previously held ideals and those held by so many today, gender has significance. Gender is assigned by God and the roles prescribed to each are as well. As the Creator, God knows how His creations best function and has lovingly provided a system for us in which we can best operate (and be sanctified if you’re like me and meekness doesn’t come at all natural to you)

This sounds like absolutely no fun at all. I just don't understand why we're supposed to squash any semblance of individuality in order to conform even if it makes us miserable.

(Well, I do get it. It's because humans are sinful and bad and apparently God wants us to feel miserable and guilty in pursuit of him, if that is what it takes. idk Fundie logic). 

[EowynW]

10 minutes ago, jerkit said:

And yeah, the dog we dog sit for loves to take naps in his "house." 

My cat even sleeps in her own crate at night. She's a teenager and will being the house down around us without supervision. I hope she outgrows that one day 

[smittykins]

@EowynW, I misread your post for a second--I thought you were saying she's a teenager in human years, not cat years. 

[feministxtian]

Ok...since my husband doesn't read this...

My husband has struggled with same-sex attraction for years. If I had to give him a label, it'd be bisexual. I know he cheated on me with a man. I also know that he has chosen to be "straight"...but I know he struggles. I gave him the option of an "open" marriage where he could pursue a same-sex relationship if he wanted. He's refused and as far as I know (after much individual and couples counseling) he still struggles but feels "safe" with me. It's taken years, and is the reason behind most of the problems we had, but he's accepted that he will always have those feelings...but he chooses not to act on them. To be honest, it might be why our marriage "works"...while I'm straight, I'm rather masculine in many ways, hobbies, interests, etc. are typically masculine (cars, sports) while he is definitely more feminine in many ways, especially his hobbies and interests (cross-stitch, decorating our home, fashion). So, I guess this is why we "work" well. 

Dogs and crates:

We had one dog that was crate trained. He LOVED his crate!! When he'd get a bit rowdy, we'd tell him to "go night-night" and he'd go in his crate. It was funny as hell, he wouldn't come out of his crate unless we gave him permission. We did have to crate him when we weren't home though...because he'd destroy the house (part Shepherd, part Lab). He also loved to share his crate with our grandson...they'd nap in there together. I had to rehome him 2 years ago when our lives blew up and I've never, ever stopped missing the big goofball. He went to a friend of a friend and I know he's loved and cared for and even has a boy to hang with. We've been invited to visit him, but I just can't do it. I have his pictures and will still cry. 

[Red Hair, Black Dress]

@feministxtian Labels don't matter. love does. You and the hubby have love. Real Love, not "fundie" love.  Nuff said.  

[feministxtian]

16 minutes ago, Red Hair, Black Dress said:

@feministxtian Labels don't matter. love does. You and the hubby have love. Real Love, not "fundie" love.  Nuff said.  

Thank you. 

[seraaa]

Yeah, @feministxtian, what @Red Hair, Black Dress said

[feministxtian]

@seraaa  and @Red Hair, Black Dress y'all are giving me the feels...all the feels. It's appreciated!!!

[eveandadam]

Don't know if that has been posted here before but she was on the 700 club last month:

 

 

 

[seraaa]

2 minutes ago, feministxtian said:

@seraaa  and @Red Hair, Black Dress y'all are giving me the feels...all the feels. It's appreciated!!!

 

[jerkit]

She sounds TERRIFIED in the 700 club video

[seattlechic]

If only she would rehome both the dog and the poor child who certainly is not asking to be born into her stupid fake life... [insert long line of expletives here]. 

 

and @feministxtian loves to you honey. xoxoxo

[Stormy]

I've thought before that Emily didn't do too good of a job "selling" her faith and convincing everyone how much better her life is now, but the one perk that she's able to convey in the 700 Club video is that her renewed faith gave her love. From God, from her newfound spouse, and possibly from members of her family. She was a vulnerable person with a ton of issues, so she saw this as some semblance of stability; I often see that people with her sort of story designate the root of all their problems (drugs, loneliness, etc.) to homosexuality, and think they can get their life back in order by rejecting that part of themselves. I can't help but feel sorry for her.

[jerkit]

7 minutes ago, Stormy said:

I've thought before that Emily didn't do too good of a job "selling" her faith and convincing everyone how much better her life is now, but the one perk that she's able to convey in the 700 Club video is that her renewed faith gave her love. From God, from her newfound spouse, and possibly from members of her family. She was a vulnerable person with a ton of issues, so she saw this as some semblance of stability; I often see that people with her sort of story designate the root of all their problems (drugs, loneliness, etc.) to homosexuality, and think they can get their life back in order by rejecting that part of themselves. I can't help but feel sorry for her.

I think this is because it's impossible to make Calvinism appealing. The message is "You are depraved wretch of a worm, barely human and you can do nothing to please God" and that's a VERY hard sell.

[louisa05]

33 minutes ago, Stormy said:

I've thought before that Emily didn't do too good of a job "selling" her faith and convincing everyone how much better her life is now, but the one perk that she's able to convey in the 700 Club video is that her renewed faith gave her love. From God, from her newfound spouse, and possibly from members of her family. She was a vulnerable person with a ton of issues, so she saw this as some semblance of stability; I often see that people with her sort of story designate the root of all their problems (drugs, loneliness, etc.) to homosexuality, and think they can get their life back in order by rejecting that part of themselves. I can't help but feel sorry for her.

I get the sense that there was some family strife due to her sexuality. The conversion brought her back into the fold. I like to think that someday, as she matures, she will realize that her family's love was conditional and not fair to her at all. But it might take a long, long time or another set of difficult events for that to happen. And the church's love is just as conditional. If she were to come to a different conclusion about sexuality and Christianity, the church and everyone in it and all the others giving her accoladed now would dump her very quickly. 

[DomWackTroll]

48 minutes ago, jerkit said:

I think this is because it's impossible to make Calvinism appealing. The message is "You are depraved wretch of a worm, barely human and you can do nothing to please God" and that's a VERY hard sell.

Yeah... On the one hand, it does relieve the person of any responsibility (irresistible grace). But on the other hand, by saying, "There's absolutely nothing you can do about your own salvation" (predestination), it makes it all too easy to say, "Screw it, then-- I'm going buck wild!" (I would wager that's what happened with BRADRICK!) 

[December]

35 minutes ago, louisa05 said:

I like to think that someday, as she matures, she will realize that her family's love was conditional and not fair to her at all. But it might take a long, long time or another set of difficult events for that to happen. And the church's love is just as conditional.

That's a very real and sad possibility. If the love's conditional, anything good that is rebuilt now will hinge on maintaining those conditions. It seems like a very precarious decision. 

3 hours ago, feministxtian said:

So, I guess this is why we "work" well. 

The social focus on labels gets out of hand sometimes. If it works for you, it's good!  

[nickelodeon]

1 hour ago, Stormy said:

...the one perk that she's able to convey in the 700 Club video is that her renewed faith gave her love. From God, from her newfound spouse, and possibly from members of her family.

Pity she can't share any of that love and has to base her entire personality on being judgmental and unkind to others...

(It's been a long while since I last caught up on this thread, good to see this person is still a hot mess)

[SusanDelgado]

What a terribly sad young lady. 

[Carm_88]

Oh boy  I think overall this is just a sad situation that won't get better with time. People are who they are, there is nothing wrong with who they are. They just have to accept it and not hang out with assholes. 

[Cleopatra7]

2 hours ago, jerkit said:

I think this is because it's impossible to make Calvinism appealing. The message is "You are depraved wretch of a worm, barely human and you can do nothing to please God" and that's a VERY hard sell.

I think that Calvinism can also be a source of narcissistic smugness, which is where the appeal comes from. As in, if I'm going to church, doing all the "right things," and materially successful, then that means I must be saved (see Max Weber's works on Calvinism). When this attitude is applied to a group of people, you get malignant racism (i.e. God loves whites and hates blacks and Native Americans, both of whom are made to serve God's chosen people). I don't think it's coincidental that the US and South Africa, countries known for their twin obsessions with racial categorization and ethnic genocide, both have deep Calvinist roots.

[purjolok84]

@feministxtian The important different between you and the fundies is that you and your husband operate by love and honesty, and a lot of fundies use control to make sure everything is just so ... and that's why situations like a partner 'turning gay' is such a surprise and a threat. Keep doing what you're doing