Sister Wives 3 - Collective in Crisis?

[2manyKidzzz]

@Georgiana  Thanks.....I didn't know how long Mariah had been angry. Missed that. I can see her anger based on the cat fishing stuff and guess I didn't watch far back enough to see the part about Mariah being influenced towards plural marriage. Which just sounds so gross IMHO. Meri is obviously miserable. It is like watching a trainwreck for me. And watch I do. 

[SummerRocks]

I PVRed it ... I'm watching the "therapy session" ... are they gonna touch the root of the problem?! Yes, I get it ... Jackie is not a good honest person, there is no Sam, all these "evil" characters, Meri got cat fished, utter embarrassment when this all came out.

But at the end of the day if Sam was real, Meri would have left the family, she wants out of the sister wives relationship they have going.

There is so much talk going on, but it all seems so meaningless.

PS my partner was watching with me, strongly disliking this show and these people - randomly spits out "go eat a banana Meri" made me laugh so hard! In reference to the "banana pic" Meri send Jackie/Sam.

[Chicken bones]

Janelle looks really good.  Dislike Maddie's wet look curls.  How annoying Kody still is, especially crashing his daughter's dinner with her best friend. 

I didn't watch the end of last season. Did they discuss that Maddie was ditching school?

[Georgiana]

The whole therapy session was a joke.  It's like the Wizard of Oz:  we've seen behind the curtain, we know it's a lie....but unlike in Oz, the Browns just can't drop the charade.  They try to keep up the illusion like we still believe them.  

They're still trying to pass the Perfect Polygamy Puppet Show off as real-life, even though we can now see the puppeteers.  

[MakeItSo]

Just watched the whole new episode...well, it was on in the background. I'm supposed to be studying for final exams next week.  Either way, same old same old. Two hours of mostly fluff. Meri looks super uncomfortable and unhappy. Sobbyn still manages to make everything that happens to other people about her somehow. She's always been incredibly talented that way. 

[CrazyCatLady]

I just don't understand how Meri can tell them she didn't have an affair. Maybe it wasn't physical, but it was still an affair!

[MarblesMom]

Meri seemed very depressed; she is not a great communicator; she is alone for days at a time, with no outside job/friends that we know of; aside from cleaning her ginormous house and seeing her "ex" every few days, what else does she have to occupy her time???   No wonder she is not a happy camper.  Her current social situation, coupled with the very public catfishing incident, and a broken relationship with her only child (at least it seems that way based on what they broadcast)   - all of these things could weigh heavily on her personal well - being.

Me thinks she wants out, but like every other fundie we talk about, who might want to leave, where are her options?  Skills, money, refuge...?

And I don't blame Maddie for RUNNING.  I bet she has had enough of the 50 shades of cray in that family.

[Fascinated]

I can't imagine what effect having one child had on Meri.  Given that she expressed a desire to have more, how would it feel to watch your husband go on to have several hundred children with multiple women? Seriously fucked up way to live.  I cannot imagine how unhappy Meri must be, especially having 'voluntarily' given up her legal wife status, which is really all she had. This just cannot be a psychologically healthy way to live, in my opinion. 

[MarblesMom]

@Fascinated Mr MM and I were discussing this very thing last night!  She was open to IVF and having another, Kody shot her down, and then had more kids with other wives.  Talk about letting the air out of your balloon! 

Add in the weird-ass divorce situation (and why Sobyn's kids needed a "legal" father more than the other spawns, I have no idea) - if it were me, I would just pack my suitcase and head on down to the bus station.

I hope she finds peace.

[seasonsoflife]

On 5/8/2016 at 8:53 PM, Fascinated said:

I think I may have this show set to record in my bedroom, where I can hide-watch without my husband  knowing.  Usual scenario:

Me: 'Ok, I'm just really tired so just going to head up, ok?' 

Mr. F: ''Yeah, I'm pretty tired too.  I will be up in a minute.'

Me: 'Shit.'

 

I HAD to read this to my husband.

[Fascinated]

5 minutes ago, seasonsoflife said:

I HAD to read this to my husband.

Haha. I did not read it to mine. It's almost time to make another attempt at subterfuge. Wish me luck!

[Natalie22]

I have a feeling that they have more in depth therapy sessions off screen - the therapist mentioned that she had talked to Meri before they left for Alaska, where they discussed telling the family about the catfish situation.  At least, that's what I took away from the beginning.  I would guess that this would be the first of many sessions about this subject, and that while they're talking about more surface issues, this may be a gateway to deeper conversations later.  

With Maddie, I don't really see why she would be 'escaping' her family.  They supported her starting college and moving out of state for that.  I don't see why she would need to marry anyone to get out when she was already out and her parents had supported all of her decisions, from going to college, to moving out of state, to joining a different religious group.  

[Georgiana]

43 minutes ago, Fascinated said:

I can't imagine what effect having one child had on Meri.  Given that she expressed a desire to have more, how would it feel to watch your husband go on to have several hundred children with multiple women? Seriously fucked up way to live.  I cannot imagine how unhappy Meri must be, especially having 'voluntarily' given up her legal wife status, which is really all she had. This just cannot be a psychologically healthy way to live, in my opinion. 

I agree.  But I think that something has to be said for how she chose to handle it.

The adult move was to pull a Janelle and leave.  Meri, more than ANY of the other women, could have.  She only had one child.  She worked.  She could have left if she wanted to.  No, it would not have been easy by any means, but she's not in Christine's position where she would be unable to work with 6 kids.  

Instead, she chose to stay and take her anger and angst out on others.  She became a bully.  She used every iota of power she had to hurt.  She used her power to advance the interests of HER child over those of her siblings.  Mariah went to private school while the other moms were struggling to feed their children.  Meri got a house with eleventy empty bedrooms while the other kids were forced to share.  

We've seen with Maddie that Janelle and Christine's kids are very close to BOTH Janelle and Christine.  Meri could have had that too.  But she spent so much time, energy, and power burning bridges that eventually she found herself marooned on an island.  

I would say to Meri the same thing I said to my sister when she said she felt stupid (for getting pregnant at 19):  Yeah, well, I feel for you and I love you, but you and I both know that it wasn't a bunch of SMART or GOOD decisions that got you here.

[Natalie22]

10 minutes ago, Georgiana said:

I agree.  But I think that something has to be said for how she chose to handle it.

The adult move was to pull a Janelle and leave.  Meri, more than ANY of the other women, could have.  She only had one child.  She worked.  She could have left if she wanted to.  No, it would not have been easy by any means, but she's not in Christine's position where she would be unable to work with 6 kids.  

Instead, she chose to stay and take her anger and angst out on others.  She became a bully.  She used every iota of power she had to hurt.  She used her power to advance the interests of HER child over those of her siblings.  Mariah went to private school while the other moms were struggling to feed their children.  Meri got a house with eleventy empty bedrooms while the other kids were forced to share.  

We've seen with Maddie that Janelle and Christine's kids are very close to BOTH Janelle and Christine.  Meri could have had that too.  But she spent so much time, energy, and power burning bridges that eventually she found herself marooned on an island.  

I would say to Meri the same thing I said to my sister when she said she felt stupid (for getting pregnant at 19):  Yeah, well, I feel for you and I love you, but you and I both know that it wasn't a bunch of SMART or GOOD decisions that got you here.

In fairness to Meri, part of the reason that Janelle's children are so close to Christine is that Christine provided childcare to all the kids while the others were working.  I think it makes sense that the woman who took care of the kids is closer to all those kids than to a woman who was out working, albeit less than Kody or Janelle.  I think there was a period of time when all the kids were homeschooled and I'm guessing Christine was more in charge of that.

[MarblesMom]

28 minutes ago, Natalie22 said:

In fairness to Meri, part of the reason that Janelle's children are so close to Christine is that Christine provided childcare to all the kids while the others were working.

This might open up a New Can of Worms... but to take what you said and apply it to any "works outside the home mom" - are those moms NOT close to their kids?!

[Natalie22]

Just now, MarblesMom said:

This might open up a New Can of Worms... but to take what you said and apply it to any "works outside the home mom" - are those moms NOT close to their kids?!

I think this applies more to a polygamy situation.  If you have your biological mother working during the day, they're going to want to spend most of the evening one-on-one with their kids.  It's when you have multiple other moms, and one of them works the same hours as your mom and also has her own kid she'd want to spend time with, it makes sense that you would be close to the one who you spent the most time with.  

I know in my own life, while I definitely had a bond with my mother, I was very close to the woman who watched my brother and I before and after school.  She definitely had a major influence on my life.  If there was another woman who was also gone during the day and the only time I was around her was when the entire family was together and/or my own mother was present, I can see how I would be less close to her.

[SweetFellowshipper]

7 minutes ago, MarblesMom said:

This might open up a New Can of Worms... but to take what you said and apply it to any "works outside the home mom" - are those moms NOT close to their kids?!

I think it's natural to develop a bond with whoever is with you all day. Someone has to be if you're a minor-- a mom, a dad, a relative, a daycare worker, a nanny, or a teacher. So of course you always have a bond with your parents, but you'll also develop a bond with your day to day caretakers whether they're your parents or not. 

[CrazyCatLady]

Another blow to our dear Meri...

http://jezebel.com/china-bans-erotic-banana-eating-livestreams-so-there-g-1775547790

[Scottie]

 I'm seriously finding Kody's "baton passing" attitude repulsive, I get that having a child decide to wed can be a difficult transition, but she is not property. Also, is it just me or does he seems to be trying REALLY hard to get Caleb to like him? 

[CrazyCatLady]

 I'm seriously finding Kody's "baton passing" attitude repulsive, I get that having a child decide to wed can be a difficult transition, but she is not property. Also, is it just me or does he seems to be trying REALLY hard to get Caleb to like him? 

Kody, much like Robyn, has to make everything about him. Maddy's engagement is no exception.

[SilverBeach]

6 hours ago, 2manyKidzzz said:

It hurt to watch Meri during that "therapy" session. And I wondered.....was that really the first time they discussed it.....if not they are all really good actors. Except Kody who just stares and makes strange remarks in the TH. I couldn't help but feel bad for Meri. 

Kody is mad AF. His ego is hurt by Meri's emotional affair (no matter that she said she did not have an affair. She did. I thought the therapist should have corrected this).

All that stuff about the legal marriage not meaning anything is BS. Meri was not the same after the divorce. The catfish helped her feel special again.

[Pretzel]

I'm not sure that I understand why people are criticizing so much about these Clowns. 

I get it, their way of doing polygamy just doesn't work out, there's a lot of jealousy among the adults, Kody is a dork at best and a douche at worst and they're all part of a walking freak show. However, they're genuinely likable in comparison to other fundies. @formergothardite will confirm that the Bateseses get cut so much slack, though they supported an alleged sexual offender for years, sent their daughters on journeys with him, Gil is on the BoD, they want to impose their believes on others and cutting other people's basic human rights is their political agenda. Yet, they're oh-so-nice and oh-so-much-better than the Duggars. Sending their brood to clown college makes them fundie heros. Even the Duggars get sympathy when the Browns don't. I assume it has to do with a heterogeneous FJ readership, and different members follow different fundies but the double standards have become significant as of late.

The Browns let their kids grow into adults and support them in making their own decisions. They don't keep them at home until marriage or actively indoctrinate them enough to stunt their critical thinking skills and emotional capacity until they're afraid of everything in life. They go to real, accredited colleges that open up substantial career paths. As far as we know, the Browns haven't beat the crap out of their kids or penalized misconduct with psychologically straining methods. The Brown parents are able to admit to mistakes and willing to work on their shortcomings, even Kody *hairflip*, as douchey as he can be and as annoying as he is to his wives *hairflip*, shows genuine affection and concern and is positively involved in his children's lives. The Brown offspring have been shown arguing or disagreeing with Kody, but there's no fear in their eyes. 

I keep repeating myself all the time and it has become quite a hassle to counteract all the Bateseses and Duggar love fests while trying to come to the Browns' defense. I'll continue doing so, though. After all, the Browns are way less dangerous people. 

[Blueruin]

3 hours ago, SilverBeach said:

Kody is mad AF. His ego is hurt by Meri's emotional affair (no matter that she said she did not have an affair. She did. I thought the therapist should have corrected this).

All that stuff about the legal marriage not meaning anything is BS. Meri was not the same after the divorce. The catfish helped her feel special again.

And when Janelle said something about Meri being Icked out by the whole "love" business Meri corrected her and said she as flattered and not icked out, clearly Meri had some kind of feelings for the invisible man.

at the end of the day the sister wives don't have her back because they leave her to toil alone in her own house, and her "husband" gets mad when she makes friends outside of the home (albeit in this case crappy friends).

and seriously Kody was disgustingly leg humperish with Caleb. I felt bad for Maddie having to watch that and have him tag along on her supper.

[mstee]

@Pretzel They may not be as awful as the Duggars or Bates. And I do agree with you that they have a much healthier relationship with their children.  But IMO, they definitely make poor choices that are worthy of us discussing. They still want to make their lives look shiny- like other fundies we discuss- and even though they tend to do a crappy job of it, I think that it's still interesting to look past what the tv show shows us and talk about their flaws. 

[SnazzyNazzy]

I have never seen a full episode of this show. I caught a few minutes of it one time, and thought the guy, was a highly punchable kind of guy. He makes me irrationally irate, just seeing his face.On a purely superficial, catty note, his hair bugs me. Plus I never got into the show, because truth be told, I think polygamy, is just silliness.