Willis Family including rape charges

[DuggarsTheEndIsNear]

I can't remember where I read it but I did read that they practice unschooling, that Brenda teaches them some basics like how to read and then it is up to the kids to follow their own interests. I am unable to find anything on the google machine that says Brenda took education courses, I can't even find that she went to college.

All I can find says they were high school sweethearts starting her senior year/his junior year, they decided before marriage they would have 12 kids and she would stay home with them. Toby wrestled for Northwestern although I haven't read that he graduated.

My gut feeling about the Willis is that all their choices are driven by Toby's grief and sense of loss. He retired from working at age 30, they decided to not send their kids to college and they are all still living and working together, even though four of the kids are now adults.

These people are focused on their talents. I can't really fault them if they pursue that instead of a rigorous academic education because I have a cousin who grew up in London and she went to a school where ballet trumped academics. To me, its fine if some people are better at dancing and other creative arts, and pursue that instead of academics.

On the show she actually says she studied education and decided that she didn't want to send her kids to school because she didn't like the one size fits all approach to traditional schooling.

[Four is Enough]

OK, I watched the first episode today. I liked it; I liked them. They are MUCH more articulate than the Duggars. They are MUCH more talented than the Rodrigues. (It wouldn't take much, but these people have appeared on the OPRY!) I can see an audience for them: look at the main singer, and listen to her voice. Emmylou Harris? And who's that other little girl with the airy fairy voice? Allison Kraus? THEY certainly have a following! And these people play REAL instruments!

There are a few red flags, but I find them more intelligent AND more likeable AN D more talented than other families we've watched on television.

OH, and: ETA: I didn't mind her homeschool thing. I think the mother meant she didn't want her kids to go to elementary school, with the "one size fits all" kind of format.. and many people I know have done that. A former classmate of mine homeschooled both her sons and they have both gone on to college... one is an actual rocket scientist.

I'm not sure she meant no school whatsoever.. I think she just mentioned the early years. I know she rejected the whole length of time the kids were in school.

[2xx1xy1JD]

I can't remember where I read it but I did read that they practice unschooling, that Brenda teaches them some basics like how to read and then it is up to the kids to follow their own interests. I am unable to find anything on the google machine that says Brenda took education courses, I can't even find that she went to college.

All I can find says they were high school sweethearts starting her senior year/his junior year, they decided before marriage they would have 12 kids and she would stay home with them. Toby wrestled for Northwestern although I haven't read that he graduated.

My gut feeling about the Willis is that all their choices are driven by Toby's grief and sense of loss. He retired from working at age 30, they decided to not send their kids to college and they are all still living and working together, even though four of the kids are now adults.

These people are focused on their talents. I can't really fault them if they pursue that instead of a rigorous academic education because I have a cousin who grew up in London and she went to a school where ballet trumped academics. To me, its fine if some people are better at dancing and other creative arts, and pursue that instead of academics.

ETA: It was bugging me about Toby and Brenda's college, this website says he graduated Northwestern University and she graduated college and was high school valedictorian. Her blurb is really offensive IMO.

gactv.com/gac/pac_ctnt/text/0,,GAC_26058_107287,00.html

I wonder if they wrote their own blurbs or if the people at GAC wrote them. The tone is horrible and smug, but I won't hate her for it if she didn't actually write it that way.

One thing I'll give credit for is that they don't seem to follow the Pearl style of discipline. When the youngest son goes around writing on the walls (of a rented house), she speaks to him about it but basically laughs.

The also remind me of an older family country/Irish band - the Rankin Family http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/The_Rankin_Family

Now, if they would do a cover of Spirit of the West's "Home for a Rest", that would be beyond awesome. (Video complete with mullets:

) I developed a fetish for fiddle music in the early 1990s.

[hibodhi]

I really don't mind that the oldest kids still live at home and that they don't attend college. They seem to be really invested in their music career and it's not like they're at home twiddling their thumbs waiting for a spouse. College really isn't a fit for everyone's life goals and as long as they don't claim that higher education is useless and sinful like the Duggars, then I really can't judge them for that choice they made.

[NoneandDoneinCali]

I really don't mind that the oldest kids still live at home and that they don't attend college. They seem to be really invested in their music career and it's not like they're at home twiddling their thumbs waiting for a spouse. College really isn't a fit for everyone's life goals and as long as they don't claim that higher education is useless and sinful like the Duggars, then I really can't judge them for that choice they made.

But the parents did decide early on that their children weren't going to college, before they even began doing their music - Brenda says in the Washington Post article that the only thing she learned in college was that she didn't want her kids to go there. She also says they moved to Nashville instead of sending their older kids to college. And that's all fine and dandy, but their oldest are 21 and 20 - did THEY decide no college, or did they hear it so many times growing up that they started to believe it?

I guess I'm going to be the dissenting voice here and say that, talent not-withstanding, these parents strike me as the typical, smug, holier-than-though TLC mega-family. Why do we fault JB and Michelle for denying their children the "normal" high school years they had, but it's okay for these college and public school educated parents to decide that their kids are too good for higher education in infancy? Is the entire brood of 12 children going to make their living in a family band? None of them will benefit from pursuing other interests, even if they have a trust fund to live off of?

[hibodhi]

But the parents did decide early on that their children weren't going to college, before they even began doing their music - Brenda says in the Washington Post article that the only thing she learned in college was that she didn't want her kids to go there. She also says they moved to Nashville instead of sending their older kids to college. And that's all fine and dandy, but their oldest are 21 and 20 - did THEY decide no college, or did they hear it so many times growing up that they started to believe it?

I guess I'm going to be the dissenting voice here and say that, talent not-withstanding, these parents strike me as the typical, smug, holier-than-though TLC mega-family. Why do we fault JB and Michelle for denying their children the "normal" high school years they had, but it's okay for these college and public school educated parents to decide that their kids are too good for higher education in infancy? Is the entire brood of 12 children going to make their living in a family band? None of them will benefit from pursuing other interests, even if they have a trust fund to live off of?

Okay, so I read through that article three times and saw no mention of being anti-college. Then I rewatched the show (I have it DVRed) and what Brenda said about education is that she was at college to become a teacher and that she didn't want to send her kids to public schools because the curriculums that she learned to create there seemed too cookie cutter to apply to each individual child. She didn't say her college experience in it of it self made her want to home school.

If someone would give me some black and white evidence that the Willis parents are like the Duggars in terms of talking about higher education, then I'll happily change my tune.

[sunshine]

Remember during the Duggar girls book tour that they mentioned that they would not know how long the show will last? Was that a ploy or were they in the middle of negotiation?

[DuggarsTheEndIsNear]

Remember during the Duggar girls book tour that they mentioned that they would not know how long the show will last? Was that a ploy or were they in the middle of negotiation?

I doubt it was any more than real uncertainty. They don't have any control over how long the network wants them. Their show could be canceled tomorrow or it could go on for another decade.

[EmmieJ]

But the parents did decide early on that their children weren't going to college, before they even began doing their music - Brenda says in the Washington Post article that the only thing she learned in college was that she didn't want her kids to go there. She also says they moved to Nashville instead of sending their older kids to college. And that's all fine and dandy, but their oldest are 21 and 20 - did THEY decide no college, or did they hear it so many times growing up that they started to believe it?

I guess I'm going to be the dissenting voice here and say that, talent not-withstanding, these parents strike me as the typical, smug, holier-than-though TLC mega-family. Why do we fault JB and Michelle for denying their children the "normal" high school years they had, but it's okay for these college and public school educated parents to decide that their kids are too good for higher education in infancy? Is the entire brood of 12 children going to make their living in a family band? None of them will benefit from pursuing other interests, even if they have a trust fund to live off of?

You're not alone in your opinion. It is a huge red flag to me that the parents decided their children would not attend college. By the time they reach college age, they are adults and should be allowed to make that decision themself, and if parents can financially help them get a college degree, I think they ought to at least consider doing so. Or if they won't contribute to the cost, at least encourage them and offer moral support. To purposely raise your child already deciding for them that they won't attend college? That's not good parenting.

The Jackson children had talent, and a horrible overbearing controlling father. The Cowsills had talent, and a horrible overbearing controlling father. Heck, the Osmonds had talent and while their father appears to have been fairly decent, he too was the driving force and I think that road was difficult for some of the children.

I wonder if the adult children will get paid directly, or if they get paid a lump sum that goes into the "Willis clan pot", ie, dad's hands.

[SportsgalAnnie]

OK, I watched the first episode today. I liked it; I liked them. They are MUCH more articulate than the Duggars. They are MUCH more talented than the Rodrigues. (It wouldn't take much, but these people have appeared on the OPRY!) I can see an audience for them: look at the main singer, and listen to her voice. Emmylou Harris? And who's that other little girl with the airy fairy voice? Allison Kraus? THEY certainly have a following! And these people play REAL instruments!

There are a few red flags, but I find them more intelligent AND more likeable AN D more talented than other families we've watched on television.

OH, and: ETA: I didn't mind her homeschool thing. I think the mother meant she didn't want her kids to go to elementary school, with the "one size fits all" kind of format.. and many people I know have done that. A former classmate of mine homeschooled both her sons and they have both gone on to college... one is an actual rocket scientist.

I'm not sure she meant no school whatsoever.. I think she just mentioned the early years. I know she rejected the whole length of time the kids were in school.

They play the Opry alot and do a wide range of music, I have heard everything from Irish to Country

[NoneandDoneinCali]

Okay, so I read through that article three times and saw no mention of being anti-college. Then I rewatched the show (I have it DVRed) and what Brenda said about education is that she was at college to become a teacher and that she didn't want to send her kids to public schools because the curriculums that she learned to create there seemed too cookie cutter to apply to each individual child. She didn't say her college experience in it of it self made her want to home school.

If someone would give me some black and white evidence that the Willis parents are like the Duggars in terms of talking about higher education, then I'll happily change my tune.

I didn't watch the show, I read the interviews - in both the Washington Post article and the USA Today article, Brenda explicitly says that they decided not to send their kids to college. The father goes on to say that they moved to Nashville instead. When I'm not on my phone, I'll post links. I may have conflated her comment about not wanting to send the kids to elementary school with not going to college, though - I'll look later:)

HOWEVER, if you notice, in order to justify and validate their homeschooling/educational choices, you (the royal "you," not you in particular) will notice that the parents' educations are mentioned numerous times - Valedictorian, wrestling scholarship at Northwestern, etc etc. The husband worked outside the home with a tech degree he earned, the mom made educational decisions based (ironically) on her own education degree. So, if college and higher education are so useless, why do they use it to justify and explain their choices? It seems just about every fundie family does this - the parents had educational and career opportunities that they will not provide nor encourage for their children. **

**I am not against homeschooling in any way, but I am against parents limiting their children's educational options because of their own prejudices. And I also have an issue with a one-size-fits-all learning method for 12 children - not one of those kids would have benefited from attending school, even part-time pre-school or a STEM or performing arts high school? Even a private tutor (they can afford one)?

[DuggarsTheEndIsNear]

I didn't watch the show, I read the interviews - in both the Washington Post article and the USA Today article, Brenda explicitly says that they decided not to send their kids to college. The father goes on to say that they moved to Nashville instead. When I'm not on my phone, I'll post links. I may have conflated her comment about not wanting to send the kids to elementary school with not going to college, though - I'll look later:)

HOWEVER, if you notice, in order to justify and validate their homeschooling/educational choices, you (the royal "you," not you in particular) will notice that the parents' educations are mentioned numerous times - Valedictorian, wrestling scholarship at Northwestern, etc etc. The husband worked outside the home with a tech degree he earned, the mom made educational decisions based (ironically) on her own education degree. So, if college and higher education are so useless, why do they use it to justify and explain their choices? It seems just about every fundie family does this - the parents had educational and career opportunities that they will not provide nor encourage for their children. **

**I am not against homeschooling in any way, but I am against parents limiting their children's educational options because of their own prejudices. And I also have an issue with a one-size-fits-all learning method for 12 children - not one of those kids would have benefited from attending school, even part-time pre-school or a STEM or performing arts high school? Even a private tutor (they can afford one)?

For college: I'm not sure that it's any better to have parents who force the idea than parents who "don't want it to happen." In both cases, the child's wants aren't taken into account. HOWEVER, there is nothing actually stopping any of these kids from attending college; if they set their mind to it, they could get scholarships or they could move out and fend for themselves while attending a community college. Once you're 18, your parents can't dictate your life without your permission. To stay at home is to give them that permission. And, therefore, each of these children has decided against college. Was the decision made with biases from their parents involved? Yes. But so are those of kids who go to med school cause it's what mommy and daddy always dreamed of for them.

And, unlike families like the Duggars, these kids are obviously putting effort into doing things with their spare time. They exercise regularly, they sing and dance in performances all over the country, at least one of the girls is really interested in (and really skilled at) illustrations, etc. Their dreams may not include college, but their parents do support their efforts and dreams.

As for the whole "not one kid out of 12 would have benefited from something other than homeschooling," how is that any different than the families who decide they're only going to send their kids to school? Most families don't even consider homeschooling, no matter how much the child is struggling.

Not to mention, if I was homeschooling, the only reason a child would not be homeschooled is if I really did not have the resources to help him or her. Same goes for regular schools, if most of my kids were in one school, I wouldn't send another to a different school unless there were was a problem with the resources that child needed to receive to succeed. And, except parents who religiously follow a curriculum, I don't know of many homeschool parents who take a one size fits all approach to homeschooling. That's really counterproductive. If you're going to go with one size fits all, send them to a regular school.

[NoneandDoneinCali]

My point was, once you are in school, you can choose your own sports/activities. You can do band, or audio visual club, or cheerleading, or swim team. You can join clubs on campus. You can have friends that aren't your siblings. So you aren't all doing Irish dance/wrestling and playing Celtic country or whatever their band is. Again, I don't have a problem with homeschooling, or think public/private school is universally great, but if you're going to say "well, all kids learn differently and I'd like to homeschool to tailor the curriculum to their needs," then it makes little sense (to me) to have all of them in the same activities and learning (or "unlearning") the same things. On the other hand, if the REAL reason you want to homeschool is to maintain control of the information your kids are exposed to, then that's just par for the course on TLC.

I don't like this "once you're 18, you can do as you please" bit. That's not how it works these days, unfortunately. And how many kids leave their family of origin the day they turn 18 and never look back? Have any of the Duggars? Cynthia Jeub and her sisters did, but they were more 20/21 by the time they broke free, and they struggled/are struggling like crazy. What about all of those stay-at-home daughters? The Maxwells? Surely at 30plus, Poor Sarah can walk out that door and find happiness? I cannot think of a single person who left their house at 17/18, and went straight on to college without ANY parental involvement, planning or support. I'm sure those people are out there, but if you've never had a job, or had a guidance counselor ... you are at a huge disadvantage in negotiating admissions and financial aid (not that any of them qualify for financial aid because of their parents' money).

I guess I'm surprised that it seems so many people on here think this family is markedly different from the other fundamentalist mega-families, just because they have more money, talent, and wear pants. YMMV, though.

[BrownieMomma]

The way I see them as different is that I feel Toby keeps his kids close because of the accident. I don't get the Duggar feeling that they are isolated from the world because they are precious snowflakes from Jesus who should not be marred or dirtied by contact or influence by someone who is different than ATI/IBLP.

I am not sure it is truly any healthier to cloister his children into homeschool and everyone pursuing the same future as a family band. But then again, there was a time where it was normal for children to take over their parents farms or businesses so maybe it just doesn't fall in line with modern expectations that every child is going to pursue a different career choice from their parents.

I think we can expect that if any of the children mature into an adult relationship leading to marriage, we are going to see weaker personalities that can be assimilated into the dominant family as Anna, Derick, and Ben have.

[patsymae]

First show just started where I am, so it's early for me to comment, but it sure seemed like the intro was a dig at the Duggars--"they do for the community not for the publicity, but because they live here..."

Maybe it's going to suck as a show, but in one interview the dad said that they keep religion separate from music and business, so if that's true that's a plus.

It does seem like they're trying to position themselves as modern-day Von Trapps (the Sound of Music version)--that will probably appeal to all the people who still wax nostalgic about the imaginary good old days but are sick to death of the Duggars.

I can't imagine the dad's trauma so don't want to judge him for his choices.

If it sucks, at least the music will be a whole lot better than Duggar violins or Bates's wailing.

I can definitely see some honchos at TLC thinking of this as a replacement for the Duggars. If your fan base includes fundies and Howard Stern...

EDITED--as this continues I realize I wrote too soon. Not sure anything can turn this snoozefest into a hit. Not fundie enough for the Duggar humpers, not interesting enough to expect a train wreck, just more like the FB friend who posts every detail--and then as I was walking to the bus I dropped my glasses, but then I bent to pick them up, and thank goodness they were still there so I was able to see the bus stop sign, so when I got on the bus I was still putting the glasses on my head so I was fumbling for my Metro card, and the bus driver looked like he was a little annoyed--except that since you don't already love these people it's 10 times worse.

"Shut up and sing

[DuggarsTheEndIsNear]

My point was, once you are in school, you can choose your own sports/activities. You can do band, or audio visual club, or cheerleading, or swim team. You can join clubs on campus. You can have friends that aren't your siblings. So you aren't all doing Irish dance/wrestling and playing Celtic country or whatever their band is. Again, I don't have a problem with homeschooling, or think public/private school is universally great, but if you're going to say "well, all kids learn differently and I'd like to homeschool to tailor the curriculum to their needs," then it makes little sense (to me) to have all of them in the same activities and learning (or "unlearning") the same things. On the other hand, if the REAL reason you want to homeschool is to maintain control of the information your kids are exposed to, then that's just par for the course on TLC.

I don't like this "once you're 18, you can do as you please" bit. That's not how it works these days, unfortunately. And how many kids leave their family of origin the day they turn 18 and never look back? Have any of the Duggars? Cynthia Jeub and her sisters did, but they were more 20/21 by the time they broke free, and they struggled/are struggling like crazy. What about all of those stay-at-home daughters? The Maxwells? Surely at 30plus, Poor Sarah can walk out that door and find happiness? I cannot think of a single person who left their house at 17/18, and went straight on to college without ANY parental involvement, planning or support. I'm sure those people are out there, but if you've never had a job, or had a guidance counselor ... you are at a huge disadvantage in negotiating admissions and financial aid (not that any of them qualify for financial aid because of their parents' money).

I guess I'm surprised that it seems so many people on here think this family is markedly different from the other fundamentalist mega-families, just because they have more money, talent, and wear pants. YMMV, though.

The activities you can do at school completely depend on the school you attend. I would have LOVED to have been a cheerleader in high school. I spent all 4 years of high school trying to persuade the school to allow cheerleading. I spent all 4 years of high school being told that the school wouldn't allow cheerleading because cheerleaders are sluts. (Of course, they started a pep squad the year after I left *eye roll*.)

Likewise, I would have loved to have attended a homecoming dance and at least had the chance of possibly even thinking about being on homecoming court. But my school didn't have football, and our one sibling school that did didn't do a homecoming dance. And, my school didn't believe in having "popularity competitions" outside of running for student council.

My school also did not have band, or A/V club, or numerous other stereotypical high school activities. We had some different clubs that were kind of cool, like robotics, but they had some intense regulations to be a member (like for robotics, you had to be a B+ or higher student who took only honors mathematics and science classes; or for speech and debate, you had to be a B+ or higher student who took only honors English classes; to participate in cultural exchanges, you had to be a A or higher student who only took honors foreign language classes).

Now, as far as the friends outside your siblings, the Willis family has talked about how they encourage friendships. We've also already seen then interact with their community and community members talk about how they know the family (something that you don't get with the Duggars, when the Duggars interact with the community it's always followed by interviews that highlight how little people know about them).

My point is, no matter what schooling you participate in, there are limitations to the experiences you can have. But, I think that homeschooling does offer a good opportunity to pursue interests because you have more flexibility in your schedule. And, I don't think that we can really make the assumption that the Willis family won't let their children pursue a certain interest. I mean, they unschool, and it pretty much goes against all the principles of unschooling to not allow a child to explore their interests.

[BrownieMomma]

I am just wary that "unschool" might really just mean "let's not tie Mom down to the dining table" while all the children are expected to follow Dad's dream of a family band and there aren't really other opportunities to explore different things.

When I homeschooled I toyed with the idea of unschooling but I quickly figured out our reality of limitations, which means pretty much what is going to be available to unschooled children is based on what their parents like or do or have around. Willis example: Toby was a college wrestler who was talented enough to consider the Olympics. His boys wrestle. Well how much exposure to golf or tennis did Toby's sons get? Likely none, but if they had gone to school where such things were offered, they actually would have an opportunity to explore their own talents and interests.

The few unschoolers I ever met and got to know enough to reach this conclusion seemed to me to be more about doing what they want when they want and not having constraints or expectations or challenges. IMO unschooling is ... lazy is not really the right word as the parents/family/kids might work very hard at making furniture or their music and dance... but it is definitely putting academic education on the back burner.

I feel pretty certain that if a young Willis went to a parent and said hey I'm so interested in science and space, I don't want to do Irish dancing I'd rather build a telescope, the telescope ain't realistically gonna happen. The parents are not gonna want to put the resources of their time and money towards something they don't personally value.

In fact, the more I write this out, the more I become convinced that unschooling is an excellent way to brainwash your kids. They won't even have exposure to an outside curriculum or any outside ideas at all.

[Boogalou]

Okay, so I read through that article three times and saw no mention of being anti-college. Then I rewatched the show (I have it DVRed) and what Brenda said about education is that she was at college to become a teacher and that she didn't want to send her kids to public schools because the curriculums that she learned to create there seemed too cookie cutter to apply to each individual child. She didn't say her college experience in it of it self made her want to home school.

If someone would give me some black and white evidence that the Willis parents are like the Duggars in terms of talking about higher education, then I'll happily change my tune.

Saying they are against sending their kids to college is in the USA today article two paragraphs above the picture of the kid in sun glasses:

The couple made the decision to not send their children to college — something Toby Willis thinks can be overrated — and moved to Nashville.

http://www.usatoday.com/story/life/tv/2 ... n/2462269/

[eh02]

I watched the first episode and immediately can't stand this family. The kids are just as brainwashed as the frumper-wearing frizzy-haired fundies we follow.

The children 100% believe that they don't want school, don't want college, don't want any career of their own, that "we will be doing this for our entire lives." If I hear one more kid go on about how homeschool kids are "actually smarter than mainstream kids!" my eyes might roll so hard I'll be stuck staring at my own brain for the rest of my life. It's not their fault. It's their parents who actually make them believe they are better than anyone else because they're homeschooled.

I felt pretty disturbed that they seem to pass as more "normal" than people like the Duggars just because they wear more modern clothes. The parents seem to be pretty emotionally unstable and the mom seems highly manipulative. "I went to college and decided education was overrated, so now every single one of my kids can't go. Mom knows best!" Another overbearing mom who has tricked her kids into believing THEY have made a choice to live this lifestyle when they are actually all powerless and nobody cares about their dreams.

I honestly think even the Duggars might be more emotionally well adjusted. The Willis kids are victims of their dad's unmanaged, overwhelming grief and their mom's need for control.

[jezziebezzie]

I tentatively liked the 1st episode. Tentative because I literally pounced on every sentence, analyzing & wondering if it meant something more.

I originally liked the Duggars for a few episodes until something jangled my chain & I started doing some research.

A couple things. Mom's talk about her straight laced wedding. Made me think that they used to live a much more strict, fundamental life but opened up a lot more after the tragedy. That seems to be when they let the music & dancing in.

The comparison of eldest sons. This guy was very engaging & seemed like a nice, genuine kid. One who liked spending time with even the littlest of his siblings & knew how to handle them. There was nothing that came across as "smug" in episode 1.

There don't seem to be the same male/female "jurisdictions". Although there was talk of the man leading the woman in dance & "good cop/bad cop" in discipline, it didn't set my spidey senses too far outta whack. More like left of centre ideaology than full on Fundie.

Jury is definitely out right now.

Oh & unlike many, I dont want the Willis' to REPLACE Duggar's. I kinda like the spotlight on that household for the sake of sweet James & put upon Joy Anna & delayed/forgotten Jordyn, etc.

[BrownieMomma]

I think Brenda, the mom, broke free from a Southern Baptist background, or something even more restrictive.

When I was growing up SBC, when we lived in GA it was okay to be a cheerleader or drill team. When we moved to TX then I was outright told to not participate in those thing, only band was acceptable. One of the other girls tried out for cheer and made it but was told in no uncertain terms to quit the squad.

The Baptists had a large youth group with lots of stuff going on. Prom was not permitted so the youth minister devised an alternate trip for high school jr/sr with their parents that was an out of town weekend trip featuring dressing up fancy for dinner at a nice restaurant.

I joined the band but I also went to prom four years.

So Brenda's comments sounded very familiar to me. I am sure there is some dissonance between how she thinks and her in-laws but they may be so broken by their loss that they don't care anymore about those kinds of rules. Clearly Toby is okay with dancing.

[MalteseBaby]

I grew up SBC mainstream Baptist, very large church for the small-ish southern town's size.. My friends and I did everything we wanted to and had our parent's consent and sometimes, urging. We had brand new sports cars when we were 15 and had learner's permits to drive, and the best of everything, because we were our parents' hope for the future, as they were the children of the Great Depression and were teens during World War II. They didn't want us to go without anything our hearts desired. And by and large, we all turned out to be well-adjusted, high achieving adults with very happy lives. It took a few hard lessons for some of us to mature ( myself included) but we learn by doing.

I doubt my parents would have let me skip a prom if I wanted to stay home- probably BECAUSE I wanted to stay home, ha. I had older boyfriends and started going to their dances and proms when I was in the 8th grade, not even in HS yet. I danced in skimpy costumes on stage in HS as part of our music and talent ensemble and was a majorette during football season and in the concert stage band in the winter. I was a regional print model for large department stores when I was 15-20, and I was photographed for catalogs, flyers, and newspapers in swimwear, active wear, bridal attire, and nighttime clothing. I never thought a thing about it except that it was fun to do and the extra money was mine to do with what I wanted to.

The Willis children may also get their own earnings from performing and enjoy the luxuries it brings them very much if they are in that same age range.

My parents were talking to me about my career and college before they enrolled me in a private kindergarten ( no public ones when I was small). My baby book has entries made by my mother that I said I wanted to be a nurse when I was 4 years old. Pictures accompanying the statement show me with my toy nurse kit and little paper nurses' cap tending to my dolls. They were college- educated, and they wanted me to reach what they called "my full potential". I'm pretty sure they were disappointed when I declined many chances to be a professional singer and musician, as lessons started when I was 5 when a retired opera singer in our resort town noticed my gifts in music. I wasn't allowed to stop the lessons and the many performances until I was a legal adult and said " No more" on my way out their door to my first apartment.

So, the Willis children may love singing as much as I did but are doing it on their terms, not their parents'. I wasn't given the choice.

I'm also pretty sure they were disappointed that I " only" became a registered nurse and not a doctor. At my grandfather's funeral, when I had been a nurse for a decade or so, I overheard my father say to some far- off relatives that had known me as a little girl "---------- ( my name) could have been anything in the world if she'd just applied herself". There's just no way to describe how that changed my relationship with my father for the rest of his life. I totally removed myself from his presence.

So, now, sadly, I understand how being a high achiever, a contributor to society, a health care professional with top grades and even nationwide accolades for professional excellence can not be enough for some parents. It cuts both ways, and IMO, the Willis young adults who want to go to college WILL go to college.

There's an episode of the Southern power- women show " Designing Women" that I remember.. Dixie Carter's character was speaking about empowering girls and she quoted an embroidered pillow her mother had made that says:

" We give our children two things,

One is roots, the other is wings".

Some of us were given everything but unconditional acceptance. I know there's only been one " Willis family" show, but I didn't feel that any of the children were pushed, forced or made to feel shame for their choices. I hope not anyway, because it's a horrible feeling to carry that burden from parents.

[actuallyjessica]

is there anywhere that i can watch this show online?

[Natalie22]

I don't know if it's been mentioned before, but it looks like the Willis' had a tv show a few years ago called The Willis Clan.

[Toothfairy]

is there anywhere that i can watch this show online?

try prime wire or project free tv.