Counting On - Part 6: Benye Wants to Give the Gospel to the "Inner City"

[Four is Enough]

Dick pics. Never got one, but I've been flashed. As a nurse, I've not only seen lots of naked dicks, I've handled more than my share. You see, I became known in my ICU as the gal who could catheterize the males.  I don't know WHY people think it's difficult. I find it MUCH easier and faster than catheterizing females.  And a meal little part of me has always noticed just how well behaved a man is when you have that thing grasped firmly in your hand   bwahahaha!

[jas]

That does sound mean alright. I would hate the idea that a male (or female) nurse would think that about me while I was in a vulnerable position.

[anotherone]

2 hours ago, foreign fundie said:

maybe counter productive, because if you have no idea what a penis looks like, you may be in for a shocking wedding night!

My grandmother, who grew up in an immigrant Catholic community, told a story of when she was almost 20 (around 1920) and one of her girlfriends was getting married.  No one had virtually any experience with the opposite sex, certain things were just not proper in those days, so a day or two after the wedding they all clamored around her and said, well what did it look like??  She holds up one of those old long wooden matchsticks with the large red top and goes, like this but bigger.  Apparently it cracked up the girls so much she was still laughing about it 70 years later.

[paulypepper]

19 minutes ago, Four is Enough said:

Dick pics. Never got one, but I've been flashed. As a nurse, I've not only seen lots of naked dicks, I've handled more than my share. You see, I became known in my ICU as the gal who could catheterize the males.  I don't know WHY people think it's difficult. I find it MUCH easier and faster than catheterizing females.  And a meal little part of me has always noticed just how well behaved a man is when you have that thing grasped firmly in your hand   bwahahaha!

Having been through many medical procedures over the past 3 years, I have nothing but love and respect for nurses and I love the fact that most have the same offbeat sense of humor that I have. It definitely helps when going through a serious procedure.

Some of my memorable ones...After waking up from an operation my nurse asked if I still had my catheter in...something clicked in my mind because I knew I was catheter less  when I went in, so I know I got 'Sierra eyes' and quickly reached my hand down to check..*whew*  it was gone..didn't want to have that removed while I was awake!

Another time I was getting prepped for a procedure and a friend was with me in the room. The nurse with clippers in hand told me not to worry because she would keep me covered up. I laughed and told her not to worry because 3/4 of the employees of the hospital have already seen me naked and It's not a problem..then I asked her if they sold those shavers in the gift shop. (Those are some awesome shavers)

Nurses ROCK!!!

[MargaretElliott]

15 hours ago, MarblesMom said:

"What would you tell a woman to do in this situation, when she receives an unwanted dick pic? 

Send back a picture of a better looking dick."

I have received two unsolicited dick picks in my life (I'm just a year older than Bin), and each time I responded like this. There's this tumblr blog, critiquemydickpic (NSFW, don't go there unless you want to see lots of penises) and I picked some very artistic, impressive ones to sent back. One of the guys got really offended, and I told him that getting a random dick pic wasn't so fun after all, was it? 

[zenbaby]

8 hours ago, nastyhobbitses said:

I don't want a dick pic, but I already know that my standard line is going to be "wow, electron microscopes have such high resolution these days."

Back in the 70s during a broadcast of the Oscars, a streaker ran across the stage while David Niven was presenting an award. Without missing a beat he made a comment about the man's 'shortcomings'. 

[EmCatlyn]

7 hours ago, Karma said:

Back in the days before mobile phones, and men flashed instead of texted these pics, my friend's mum advised me that if I was flashed, I should firmly say "oh, put it away, I'm a nurse, and I've seen hundreds of them." 

Sadly (?) I never had the opportunity.  My two first penis viewings (as a teenager) were accidental (drunk fast asleep on a train, eww, and a milkman who didn't realise that propping open his milk truck door while wearing very short shorts and no undies wasn't a great idea when serving a 15 year old girl.  I got my chocolate milk and left very quickly!

I've never received a texted picture of one either...not surprising since I've been married since before mobile phones.

 

Men still flash.  My daughter and I were flashed by a guy a couple of years ago while crossing   a parking lot after a movie.

As for getting penis pictures, I got my first one in Yahoo email about 20 years ago. I belonged to several Yahoo groups and had a Yahoo profile.  I assume the person got my email address from the profile, and that profile said clearly that I was married, with kids. (The profile did not include a picture.)

When, after my divorce 12 years ago or so, I did some online dating, I got a few more penis pictures via e-mail.   I always report when such pictures are a violation of TOU, but otherwise ignore them.  It's kind of pathetic.

Have never received a penis pic as a Text, but that's probably because I avoid giving out my cell number as much as possible.   I did for a while get unsolicited "Jesus loves you, repent for your sins" texts.  It was only marginally less annoying than dick-pics would be.

[Shadoewolf]

Was working as a medical assistant in a urology office and one of my main duties was to cath guys for their bladder medication. It took about...2 weeks before I was fully comfortable doing the procedure. Almost all of them had a good sense of humor about it though.

[imokit]

There was a boy in my class nicknamed snippy by the other boys.  I don't think that the teachers who occasionally used that nickname (it was that commonly used) realised that it was referring to the fact that he'd been circumcised.  And just to be clear, it came from other boys who found out during sports or something, changing room banter leaving the changing rooms, as a girl telling.

I never saw it, but the whole year knew about it.  Teenagers

[MoonFace]

On 4/15/2016 at 2:09 PM, Handmaiden of Dog said:

Nothing to do with this (as far as I know).   Can't get rid of that heading

I've never had a dick pic either.   If I did I would ask what caused it to curl up and die. 

[Grimalkin]

7 hours ago, Four is Enough said:

Dick pics. Never got one, but I've been flashed. As a nurse, I've not only seen lots of naked dicks, I've handled more than my share. You see, I became known in my ICU as the gal who could catheterize the males.  I don't know WHY people think it's difficult. I find it MUCH easier and faster than catheterizing females.  And a meal little part of me has always noticed just how well behaved a man is when you have that thing grasped firmly in your hand   bwahahaha!

      Complimenting is a way to get out of things. My husband tries this. "Your make the best cup of tea, can you make some?" 

        I do it too"I am terrible at picking up dog poo, you should do it!"

[nastyhobbitses]

So some guy on Tinder just messaged me with "how do you feel about unsolicited duck pics?" and sent me a gif of a duckling.

I responded with a gif of a cat.

I think this is the start of a Godly Courtship.

[EyeQueue]

I've never gotten a dick pic, but have been the unwilling recipient of various flashings from the time I was about 7 to 16.

1.) Flasher at the fence of my elementary school.

2.) Man who would take his garbage out with his robe undone and wearing nothing underneath it. While kids were walking past his house on the way to school. C. 3rd grade

3.) Man driving in a car wanking it and asked me and my friend up to the window to give him directions. Saw said waking and we ran off down the street. 6th grade

4.) Man who would hang out on a common route that high schoolers would walk home. He would stand behind this fence and stick his junk out between two fence slats. 10th grade

I always wondered what, exactly, I had done wrong to receive this amount of flashed junk.

[MarblesMom]

That's a lot of junk-flashing, @EyeQueue!! 

[foreign fundie]

1 hour ago, nastyhobbitses said:

So some guy on Tinder just messaged me with "how do you feel about unsolicited duck pics?" and sent me a gif of a duckling.

I responded with a gif of a cat.

I think this is the start of a Godly Courtship.

Next time, ask him how he feels about unsollicited Duggar pics. Michelle with bug eyes. JBs hairdo. Or a tater tot cassarole. If that doesn't scare him, he's a keeper.

1 hour ago, EyeQueue said:

I've never gotten a dick pic, but have been the unwilling recipient of various flashings from the time I was about 7 to 16.

1.) Flasher at the fence of my elementary school.

2.) Man who would take his garbage out with his robe undone and wearing nothing underneath it. While kids were walking past his house on the way to school. C. 3rd grade

3.) Man driving in a car wanking it and asked me and my friend up to the window to give him directions. Saw said waking and we ran off down the street. 6th grade

4.) Man who would hang out on a common route that high schoolers would walk home. He would stand behind this fence and stick his junk out between two fence slats. 10th grade

I always wondered what, exactly, I had done wrong to receive this amount of flashed junk.

Maybe these guys think girls get as exited about seeing random penises as they get about seeing random boobs. If that is what they think, someone needs to set them straight. 

Poor you. I hope you had enough decent men in your life to not be put off forever. I would consider becoming a nun after all that.

[EyeQueue]

1 hour ago, foreign fundie said:

Next time, ask him how he feels about unsollicited Duggar pics. Michelle with bug eyes. JBs hairdo. Or a tater tot cassarole. If that doesn't scare him, he's a keeper.

Maybe these guys think girls get as exited about seeing random penises as they get about seeing random boobs. If that is what they think, someone needs to set them straight. 

Poor you. I hope you had enough decent men in your life to not be put off forever. I would consider becoming a nun after all that.

Yep! I've been fortunate in having a bulk of decent men in my life to help undo some of that.

[lascuba]

3 hours ago, nastyhobbitses said:

So some guy on Tinder just messaged me with "how do you feel about unsolicited duck pics?" and sent me a gif of a duckling.

I responded with a gif of a cat.

I think this is the start of a Godly Courtship.

Marry him. 

[Timetostoplurking]

4 hours ago, EyeQueue said:

I've never gotten a dick pic, but have been the unwilling recipient of various flashings from the time I was about 7 to 16.

1.) Flasher at the fence of my elementary school.

2.) Man who would take his garbage out with his robe undone and wearing nothing underneath it. While kids were walking past his house on the way to school. C. 3rd grade

3.) Man driving in a car wanking it and asked me and my friend up to the window to give him directions. Saw said waking and we ran off down the street. 6th grade

4.) Man who would hang out on a common route that high schoolers would walk home. He would stand behind this fence and stick his junk out between two fence slats. 10th grade

I always wondered what, exactly, I had done wrong to receive this amount of flashed junk.

Maybe you were a fundie in a previous life and the universe is making up for it. 

[19Kittens]

When my husband is gone for long stretches of time (he's a commercial fisherman) we'll send pictures back and forth, so I'm thankful to say all my dick pic's have come from him and have very much been solicited lol. 

[Mela99]

13 hours ago, anotherone said:

My grandmother, who grew up in an immigrant Catholic community, told a story of when she was almost 20 (around 1920) and one of her girlfriends was getting married.  No one had virtually any experience with the opposite sex, certain things were just not proper in those days, so a day or two after the wedding they all clamored around her and said, well what did it look like??  She holds up one of those old long wooden matchsticks with the large red top and goes, like this but bigger.  Apparently it cracked up the girls so much she was still laughing about it 70 years later.

This is the best thing I've read ALL DAY. 

[CreationMuseumSeasonPass]

57 minutes ago, 19catsandcounting said:

When my husband is gone for long stretches of time (he's a commercial fisherman) we'll send pictures back and forth, so I'm thankful to say all my dick pic's have come from him and have very much been solicited lol. 

The only dick pic I've ever gotten is from my husband. I was out of town, and we were sending flirtatious texts. I think one of us made a joke about unsolicited dick picks. This led to my one and only dick pick (ohhhhhh darn) I also think he was drunk...

[Jana'sHairScrunchie]

I have received one unsolicited dick pic from a former male friend. It was really impressive, to the point that I kind of assumed it wasn't actually his (but I think it might have been, whatever). The thing was like a parade float. 

My fiancé and I send flirty texts but he always keeps that aspect covered up, which I actually appreciate. Keepin' it tasteful. 

[MarblesMom]

At one point at work, about 10 years ago, a male employee was sending DPs to other male employees, via company email.  The recipients complained and I was assigned to investigate.  Clearly, one of the high points of my career in HR....

So, I had the printed pic, and at some point in my questioning, held it up in front of the sender and asked him "Is this yours?" (And at the same time wondering internally what I had done wrong in past lives to be in the current situation...)

He never admitted the pic was his own junk, but I never understood where he was heading with his antics.  He admitted to sending DPs, however. 

Sigh.

 

 

[coffeefilter]

10 hours ago, EyeQueue said:

I've never gotten a dick pic, but have been the unwilling recipient of various flashings from the time I was about 7 to 16.

1.) Flasher at the fence of my elementary school.

2.) Man who would take his garbage out with his robe undone and wearing nothing underneath it. While kids were walking past his house on the way to school. C. 3rd grade

3.) Man driving in a car wanking it and asked me and my friend up to the window to give him directions. Saw said waking and we ran off down the street. 6th grade

4.) Man who would hang out on a common route that high schoolers would walk home. He would stand behind this fence and stick his junk out between two fence slats. 10th grade

I always wondered what, exactly, I had done wrong to receive this amount of flashed junk.

Seriously, YUCK! I've only experienced number 2 on your list but it was enough. 

What is with Jessas fake laugh?!  It's so annoying. She and Ben have the chemistry of two oven mittens. 

[HumbleJillyMuffin]

There's a part of me that has to wonder what Nancy Daniels at TLC would think knowing that a discussion thread dedicated to her precious show has turn into a conversation about dick pics and flashers.