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Terrie

Family Research Council condemns Paypal while asking for donations via... Paypal

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AnywhereButHere
42 minutes ago, Terrie said:

I work with a trans-woman right now and I've used the bathroom at the same time. It's only an issue if you make it an issue. I like my mom's view on it. "I might feel differently about sharing a bathroom with a trans-woman if there weren't doors on the stalls. Or with a cis-woman. Or, really, anyone."

Seriously. Do your business, flush, Lysol if needed, wash your hands, and don't go peering into stalls you are not occupying. Bathroom etiquette 101. Do these things, and we're good.  I don't give a shit (no pun intended :pb_razz:)  about anything else.

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19 cats and counting

Besides in women's bathrooms, there are stalls.  Close the stall and take a piss, then wash your hands and leave.  

 

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Sundaymorning

What really bothers me in some bathrooms (and I've encountered many of them in the US) is when there is a huge gap at the edge of the bathroom stall door. If they are so concerned about modesty and privacy, they should campaign for doors which close properly, instead of hating on trans people.

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missegeno
5 hours ago, warriorblade8857 said:

This makes me a bit uncomfortable too, just because I think a trans person shouldn't be required to explain themselves or broadcast such a personal journey, just to make others feel comfortable. In the ideal world, other people shouldn't be making a fuss. But, then again, I'm a cis heterosexual woman, and I'll never have to experience this. And you said she was okay with it.

Sadly, the mega-broadcasting is pretty unavoidable as long as people are busy trying to categorize people as m/f instead of just accepting that we are all part masculine and part feminine and can have any distribution of those elements regardless of genitalia. One of my best friends from college is trans and had to have an announcement distributed to her whole (albeit small) company when she was finally taking that step. Even though it was a work-from-home deal where sharing bathrooms isn't involved, it was a whole big thing. The coworkers were wonderful and supportive, but there was no way to just change her name everywhere and just hope people figure it out. But I could tell she was really upset about losing her gains with clients who would call in asking for MaleName. But she no longer went by MaleName, and her voice no longer reflected MaleName. She was faced with the choice of telling the clients with whom she had spent years building a reputation and trust that she is now a woman, or pretending as if MaleName had left the company, and now there is this new unknown woman. She opted for the latter.

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EyeQueue
8 hours ago, HerNameIsBuffy said:

Because so many rapists who by definition have serious problems with women and violent dominance issues are comfortable cross-dressing?  

Who is coming up with this stuff and are they familiar with people as a whole...at all?

I got into a Facebook argument lite with a friend the other day about this issue. She is convinced that once these laws are passed there will be flocks of men in skirts just waiting outside of women's bathrooms for the ink to dry on the signature once the Governor signs it into law so they can get to the rapin'. :(

I tried to explain that I would suspect if this has ever happened at all, it was not a huge problem, and she fired back with, "So, what you're saying is that even one rape is OK with you to make this minority feel 'comfortable.'"

Some people just don't get it. If a man wants to rape, he's going to take the easiest route I would suspect. And I don't think that involves buying a dress, dressing up in said dress, and trying to dodge various bystanders to get into a women's bathroom.

Does anyone think about Occam's Razor anymore, FFS?

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19 cats and counting
10 hours ago, Sundaymorning said:

What really bothers me in some bathrooms (and I've encountered many of them in the US) is when there is a huge gap at the edge of the bathroom stall door. If they are so concerned about modesty and privacy, they should campaign for doors which close properly, instead of hating on trans people.

I won't disagree on this.  And the gaps where you can clearly see someone's in the stall.   Although I will admit that my first way of determining if a stall is vacant is to check for feet.

Also people have different levels of modesty and privacy when it comes to public places.  My gym locker room is hybrid.  There's people who change out in the open and then there's people who change in private (there's two private changing rooms about the size of a store dressing room).  IME it is divided by age with the younger people changing in private.  

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Giddy
Loveday
11 hours ago, 19 cats and counting said:

Besides in women's bathrooms, there are stalls.  Close the stall and take a piss, then wash your hands and leave.  

 

And I don't know about anyone else, but I don't even look at other people when I go into a public bathroom. I mean, if someone makes a comment about how crowded it is or whatever, I'll respond politely, but I don't stare into their faces or examine their wardrobe choices or anything. I feel like once a person steps into a public restroom it becomes their personal space, no matter how many people are in there, and I try to act accordingly. So how would I even know if someone waiting their turn or washing their hands was trans or not (not that there's a sooper-speshul trans 'look', of course, I'm sure that even if I DID go around staring at people trying to figure out if they were trans or not, I doubt I'd be able to!)? Do fundies go into a bathroom and give everyone there the once-over before they hit the stalls and do their business? :pb_rollseyes:

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Wenny
16 hours ago, HerNameIsBuffy said:

Because so many rapists who by definition have serious problems with women and violent dominance issues are comfortable cross-dressing?  

Who is coming up with this stuff and are they familiar with people as a whole...at all?

Errrrrgh I really makes me mad that it is always "Scary scary MTF person!!" yet no one talk about FTM attacks. 

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AnywhereButHere
44 minutes ago, Loveday said:

And I don't know about anyone else, but I don't even look at other people when I go into a public bathroom. I mean, if someone makes a comment about how crowded it is or whatever, I'll respond politely, but I don't stare into their faces or examine their wardrobe choices or anything. I feel like once a person steps into a public restroom it becomes their personal space, no matter how many people are in there, and I try to act accordingly. So how would I even know if someone waiting their turn or washing their hands was trans or not (not that there's a sooper-speshul trans 'look', of course, I'm sure that even if I DID go around staring at people trying to figure out if they were trans or not, I doubt I'd be able to!)? Do fundies go into a bathroom and give everyone there the once-over before they hit the stalls and do their business? :pb_rollseyes:

Yeah, how exactly would we even begin to enforce this? Would there be someone checking IDs or birth certificates at the door to public restrooms? Because honestly, I have enough of an issue dealing with the electronic lock on my workplace bathroom. Don't even try to card me when I have to go! :pb_razz:

Or hey, maybe we should just pants everyone as they walk in the door. That'll work. No violation there or anything. :roll:

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DaisyD

There's a MTF trans person at my parent's church. My mom has expressed some discomfort at sharing a bathroom with this person. She has no issue with a biological man wanting to be/feeling they are a woman. I think what got her the first time was walking out of the stall to a person in a very short dress (inappropriate for church, female or not, short) with a five o'clock shadow (it's a really small bathroom). I think I might be a bit taken aback by that the first time too.

It's not a judgemental thing. It's really more of a lack of exposure thing. I'll cop to being a bit stunned the first time I saw two men having sex on tv. It's just not something I'd seen before, whereas I've seen plenty of women kissing and such over the years (fucked up double standard in our society). The ludicrous claims of the fundies aside, I think most people just need the opportunity to wrap their heads around it, then they'll be fine.

It's the same thing I went through while pumping milk in the military. The men usually got a little embarrassed looking the first time I asked where to go, then didn't even flinch when I'd lock the door or come out after having pumped even though they knew what was going on and had to go around my office to get to theirs.

Hopefully, by the time my kids are in the workforce bathroom signs and the like will no longer be used. I think it's all just part of our evolution as a society. 

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Hera
15 hours ago, Terrie said:

I work with a trans-woman right now and I've used the bathroom at the same time. It's only an issue if you make it an issue. I like my mom's view on it. "I might feel differently about sharing a bathroom with a trans-woman if there weren't doors on the stalls. Or with a cis-woman. Or, really, anyone."

Right?  I mean, I barely even look at the other people in the bathroom when I'm in there, much less think about what is going on in someone else's stall.  

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fiery redhead

Hypocrisy aside, it always amazes me how fundies always attack someone else's reaction to something rather than explaining their own. Probably because their opinions usually have nothing to back it up. 

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desertvixen

One of my former soldiers is running into this.  She's not trans, but she is gay.  She's also rather short, pretty slim build, keeps her hair short, and wears a lot of pants and not-distinctly-feminine shirts.  She's not trying to present as male, but she's been getting backlash on this - including being reported as a man in the bathroom.

It's just ridiculous.

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Tired
CyborgKin

FRC had really better boycott credit cards too.  You know some of the things they are used for...

Oh and they should condemn cash too.  And banks.

Actually they better give up all forms of economic exchange just to be sure.

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