Jessa, Ben, and Spurgeon part 5

[missegeno]

24 minutes ago, actuallyjessica said:

I can't stand this bunch as much as the rest of you but I just have to say this:

Really?! Are they your bitches eating cookies? I've never seen them claim they do 100% of their shopping at Goodwill and the like, but they do (or at least used to!) do a hell of a lot of second hand shopping. If they bought their son a personalised bib from Etsy or somewhere, then great. It's also possible that somebody gifted it to them.

If someone is frugal most of the time so that they can make purchases that are important to them then that's what it's all about, isn't it?

Sorry if my comment came across poorly! I think its really adorable and see no issue with them having that for Spurge. I was just making a snarky comment about the likelihood of getting such a bib at a thrift store. I think most people have figured out that they don't thrift as much as they used to, but they haven't really discussed it since those days to update the audience. The new series is just a series of clips of them contradicting the things they claim in other clips, so I didn't see a problem with having a chuckle over another contrast. I get what you're saying, but I wasn't trying to attack them for having something nice for their child.

[Mercer]

I took that comment as more that the Seewalds gave their baby such an odd/unfortunate name that they would never be able to find something secondhand from other parents who had called their baby the same thing, not that they should never buy anything new.

I will say that in general, I do think that Jim Bob and Michelle have been much more self-congratulatory about their frugality than the spending choices they've actually demonstrated on camera deserved. The kidult generation doesn't seem to toot their own horn about their supposed thrift quite as much, though. 

[nst]

maybe that was the way Jessa could justify buying new things daily 

[ClaraOswin]

3 hours ago, nickelodeon said:

That young man is drenched in his own saliva!

And here I thought he looks pretty dry compared to my kid. Ha! He was almost always in a bib (which was changed a million times a day.) And his outfit typically had to be changed a lot. The joys of teething.

3 hours ago, anotherone said:

Maybe I'm misunderstanding the hubbub over that, it's that you're not supposed to let him sleep in the carseat, right?  How much of an over the top mom do you have to be to drive around with the kid in the carseat and not let him fall asleep?  For my kids at that age, driving in the car was an instant snoozefest.

In the car, the seat has a bit of an angle to keep their head back better. At least I think that's the case. My child has never been a car sleeper so I can't really say. But I believe it's only a 'danger' before they can lift their head on their own. After that, it's fine.

I had read news stories of kids dying after falling asleep in car seats. I know at least one I remember reading happened because the child wasn't buckled in and then got strangled or something. (Unless I am remembering wrong.) 

[Antimony]

Okay, this question could span topics but it's been driving me nuts. What is with the paper baby month age labels (the tie things)? I've seen Jill, Jessa and Alyssa Bates use them. I've even seen Facebook friends use  them. Where do they come from? Are they like part of baby book kits? Why are they so popular? 

I read a lot of mommy blogs but they're never mentioned or explained. Just, somehow, every mother I've seen in this age bracket has had these magical month labels on hand and posts them without comment. Nobody ever addresses the labels directly that I've seen. I haven't even seen a post like "Bought my pack of baby labels!!" What is this unspoken baby labeling sticker rule, why did it start and where are they coming from??

[TXGirlInAMaterialWorld]

I have seen the month stickers in with the baby stuff at craft stores.  I think it started as a Pinterest/Etsy type thing that took off.  

[Mercer]

15 minutes ago, Antimony said:

Okay, this question could span topics but it's been driving me nuts. What is with the paper baby month age labels (the tie things)? I've seen Jill, Jessa and Alyssa Bates use them. I've even seen Facebook friends use  them. Where do they come from? Are they like part of baby book kits? Why are they so popular? 

I read a lot of mommy blogs but they're never mentioned or explained. Just, somehow, every mother I've seen in this age bracket has had these magical month labels on hand and posts them without comment. Nobody ever addresses the labels directly that I've seen. I haven't even seen a post like "Bought my pack of baby labels!!" What is this unspoken baby labeling sticker rule, why did it start and where are they coming from??

A friend of mine did those. In her case she made them herself (she designed them on the computer and printed them out) and her reason for using them was to keep a visual record of how much the baby grew up each month, and so that when mom, dad, and relatives looked back at the pictures in the future, they'd remember exactly how old the baby was at the time.

[nst]

i personally think it's the only way for Jessa to remind Ben that they get to adopt in four months 

cause I guarantee you come August 5 we will get another photo of another baby to be claimed as an adoption 

[ShepherdontheRock]

42 minutes ago, nst said:

i personally think it's the only way for Jessa to remind Ben that they get to adopt in four months 

cause I guarantee you come August 5 we will get another photo of another baby to be claimed as an adoption 

PLEASE GOD NO

[ClaraOswin]

We did tie ones similar to the ones Jessa is using. I bought them on Etsy. We just stuck them onto his onesie each month for the first year. We also put a sock monkey in the picture with him each time. It's just kind of fun to compare the pictures month to month. Even now, at 2.5 years old I take a monthly picture with the sock monkey (no more stickers though.)

[Apricot]

5 hours ago, Antimony said:

Okay, this question could span topics but it's been driving me nuts. What is with the paper baby month age labels (the tie things)? I've seen Jill, Jessa and Alyssa Bates use them. I've even seen Facebook friends use  them. Where do they come from? Are they like part of baby book kits? Why are they so popular? 

I read a lot of mommy blogs but they're never mentioned or explained. Just, somehow, every mother I've seen in this age bracket has had these magical month labels on hand and posts them without comment. Nobody ever addresses the labels directly that I've seen. I haven't even seen a post like "Bought my pack of baby labels!!" What is this unspoken baby labeling sticker rule, why did it start and where are they coming from??

I think they're just a bit of fun to compare how much the child is growing throughout their first year.  I was never organised enough for something like that but if someone had bought some for me then I probably would have used them.  One of my FB friends has the monthly ones and also some that say "first tooth" and "I slept through the night".  They're pretty cute.

[JillyO]

I think this took off around the same time as those fruit-sized stickers for mom's baby belly (those "I'm so-and-so-many weeks along and baby is as big as an orange" thingies). I've had a couple of Facebook friends post those kinds of pictures recently as well.

 

[Ungodly Grandma]

9 hours ago, Mercer said:

I took that comment as more that the Seewalds gave their baby such an odd/unfortunate name that they would never be able to find something secondhand from other parents who had called their baby the same thing, not that they should never buy anything new.

I will say that in general, I do think that Jim Bob and Michelle have been much more self-congratulatory about their frugality than the spending choices they've actually demonstrated on camera deserved. The kidult generation doesn't seem to toot their own horn about their supposed thrift quite as much, though. 

I think if you are going to have children until you literally can't anymore, you'd better be very frugal. That was what I understood to be a large part of the show's initial appeal, how do they manage.  The kidults are a whole other ball of wax, they (some of them) are used to starting a registry and getting most of what's on it.

[anotherone]

1 hour ago, Ungodly Grandma said:

I think if you are going to have children until you literally can't anymore, you'd better be very frugal. That was what I understood to be a large part of the show's initial appeal, how do they manage.  The kidults are a whole other ball of wax, they (some of them) are used to starting a registry and getting most of what's on it.

It's funny though to see the JB family spend thousands on a bunch of lumber for a tree house.  An elaborate backyard swingset can cost over a thousand and a large wooden storage shed can be a few thousand.  Their structure includes the lumber and hardware for the bridge and fence as well.  And all the equipment, did they just have all that lying around?  Frugal people would just take the kids to the park.

I remember thinking the same thing the first time I watched a show.  It was the one where they built the gocarts and ramps for some kind of race in their backyard.  It seemed like so much work and money to plan this, build them, get all those older boys invoved,  and then it seemed they used them once and that was it. 

 

[Ungodly Grandma]

55 minutes ago, anotherone said:

It's funny though to see the JB family spend thousands on a bunch of lumber for a tree house.  An elaborate backyard swingset can cost over a thousand and a large wooden storage shed can be a few thousand.  Their structure includes the lumber and hardware for the bridge and fence as well.  And all the equipment, did they just have all that lying around?  Frugal people would just take the kids to the park.

I remember thinking the same thing the first time I watched a show.  It was the one where they built the gocarts and ramps for some kind of race in their backyard.  It seemed like so much work and money to plan this, build them, get all those older boys invoved,  and then it seemed they used them once and that was it. 

 

TLC probably provides the materials as a plot (of sorts.) Cheaper than taking the whole gang on a trip.

[Eternalbluepearl]

I've seen the stickers I want to say at babies R Us. I think they are a good idea. What gets annoying, I think, is the social media part of it where every month the sticker picture is posted and friends are expected to say "wow! so big!" *shrug* Sorry I know that comes off as bitchy. I'll see myself out... 

[19 cats and counting]

Re their frugality.  I don't think it has passed much to the 2nd generation.  Look at Jill and Jessa's wedding registries as proof.  Now look at Michael Bates Keilen's registry.  Hers was reasonable in comparison (one store, nothing super high-end, nothing out of the ordinary like a gun).  Sure, question the pink bedroom but she wasn't greedy.

I do remember Anna being quite smug about it and mentioning things like that using cloth diapers justify her driving a Hummer, etc.  I also remember her throwing shade at people who shopped at the mall instead of thrift stores.

[Antimony]

4 hours ago, JillyO said:

I think this took off around the same time as those fruit-sized stickers for mom's baby belly (those "I'm so-and-so-many weeks along and baby is as big as an orange" thingies). I've had a couple of Facebook friends post those kinds of pictures recently as well.

 

I know there is an app that gives you fruit comparisons because once, before a thesis defense, one woman asked another "How's your cantelope?" And the answer was, "Oh it turned into a cabbage." And me, just eating my bagel, had a good 30 seconds of total confusion. 

That app/trend is producing the best conversations to overhear.

[Audrey2]

On 4/5/2016 at 7:11 AM, Defrauding Feminist ESQ said:

There's no way they would live in the city.  If they moved, they'd live like an hour outside of the city, in a church town.  Illinois has plenty of those.

Similar thing happened with Josh and DC.  Granted, they lived fairly close to the city because of Josh's work (I think it was like 45 minutes away), but rent in DC is worse than in Chicago, and the people are definitely more likely to eat someone alive.  Washingtonians tend to be argumentative, especially about policy.  The Duggars tend to self-isolate though, so it isn't too much of an issue for them.

I'm sure she knows when she ovulates, which also means she knows when she's not ovulating.  I do, however, wonder if she will use that knowledge

I'm not trying to defend their shopping behavior, just trying to ask why.

 

I grew up with a stay at home Mom and a blue collar Dad. We made it work and still managed to take great vacations because we had a big garden that feed us all summer and most of the winter, used our camper instead of expensive hotel rooms,and wore hand me downs. I hated the hand me downs, as they came from my cousin who was enough older that the clothes were out of style, and not always what I would have chosen. As an adult, I like to wear nice clothes from my favorite ladies only shop, which I visit a little too often (to check out the sales- I still hate to pay retail!) I can understand that, if you only had used things and hand me downs growing up, how you'd want nicer things as an adult.

[karen77]

11 hours ago, nst said:

i personally think it's the only way for Jessa to remind Ben that they get to adopt in four months 

cause I guarantee you come August 5 we will get another photo of another baby to be claimed as an adoption 

But they can't in August, they have to wait until Nov1 (married for 2 years business)

[nst]

2 minutes ago, karen77 said:

But they can't in August, they have to wait until Nov1 (married for 2 years business)

but they can apparently i read here somewhere start looking seriously because she won't care 

so random baby picture in a card to ben - she can do that and post it for us heathens 

 

[TXGirlInAMaterialWorld]

The more I see Ben- the more I think of just how young he is.  I know there are many people who start families early, join the military etc. but I just don't think he and Jessa will be happy in 10 years.  I think in some ways they will feel they have reach the pinnacle of piety by being completely miserable.  I think that is one of my biggest beefs with fundies- if you are miserable with the life you have there could only be one of two reasons- 1) you are ungrateful for the blessings God has given you or 2) God has willed your misery and who are you to question it.  

[2manyKidzzz]

I am wondering this is my TinyMind. How many women could actually be pregnant as many times as J'Chelle was? I mean, really. These people are so strange. (not a new concept)

[EmCatlyn]

On April 5, 2016 at 7:17 AM, Apricot said:

This.  I cannot imagine the resentment that would breed, even when "keeping sweet".

Jessa does seem (from what we've seen at least) to enjoy being a mom.  I can't picture her with a large brood but does she even realise that she has the option not to have eleventy children?  With their standards of education as they are, I wonder how much factual knowledge they have on the mechanics of avoiding pregnancy. 

The Internet and the drugstore are good sources of information accessible to Jessa and other married fundies.  The real problem is peer and parental pressure and status.

Jessa and Ben may not (individually) want more kids, but I doubt either will admit it, even to each other.  I don't think they are prepared to discuss planned reproduction with each other. And I think that while they could quietly delay the next pregnancy for a couple of years, any longer would cause questions from their parents and pitying, superior looks from "more fertile" fundy couples.

But at least for now Jessa seems to be enjoying motherhood without feeling a strong urge to build on that pleasure by reproducing again in a hurry, which is definitely to the good.

[EmmieJ]

21 hours ago, ClaraOswin said:

Sturgeon. Love it.

And dang...I am an over-the-top mom when it comes to safety....but clearly the child is not in any danger in that photo. For one thing, he's awake. And another, they are sitting right by him.

Sturge looks fine to me.  In both photos, he's with one or both parents.  In both photos, he seems content, not fussing or crying.  I had a car seat that would pop out like that, and it did make it easy to lift my infant son out of the car and carry inside a store or home.  I used it mainly when he had fallen asleep in the car and I didn't want to disturb him too much.