Erika Shupe *leer smirk* Large Families on Purpose Part 6

[AliceInFundyland]

5 minutes ago, THERetroGamerNY said:

...somebody mentioned bunnies??

This is how you and I got linked up to begin with. You mentioned bunnies and I noticed it...if I'd only known...

[Rubaiyat]

So, to veer off topic just a bit, All My Kids (and both us us parental-figures) are sick.  I just want to make super sure I do this correctly.  

I put the kids on towels on the bathroom floor for the rest of the day and evening, feed only bananas/rice/applesauce/tea, don't tend to or speak to anyone to avoid contamination, and - as soon as we are even marginally better - declare a school holiday so we can spend the day disinfecting the house.  Right?  

We just have colds, but we are all stuffy, achy, whiny and miserable.  We are going to snuggle up and watch Phineas and Ferb and take probiotics and tea.  We love tea, I don't care if it's on Erika's diet.  With loads of raw honey.  Also? We're going to suck on candy because it makes our throats feel better.  We are also taking ebil scientifically-recommended medicines.  Blarg.  

[refugee]

6 minutes ago, Rubaiyat said:

So, to veer off topic just a bit, All My Kids (and both us us parental-figures) are sick.  I just want to make super sure I do this correctly.  

I put the kids on towels on the bathroom floor for the rest of the day and evening, feed only bananas/rice/applesauce/tea, don't tend to or speak to anyone to avoid contamination, and - as soon as we are even marginally better - declare a school holiday so we can spend the day disinfecting the house.  Right?  

We just have colds, but we are all stuffy, achy, whiny and miserable.  We are going to snuggle up and watch Phineas and Ferb and take probiotics and tea.  We love tea, I don't care if it's on Erika's diet.  With loads of raw honey.  Also? We're going to suck on candy because it makes our throats feel better.  We are also taking ebil scientifically-recommended medicines.  Blarg.  

Sorry you're all sick. I like your approach better than hers.

Something we do with yucky colds is to squeeze the juice of half a lemon into a cup, add a good dollop of raw honey, fill the cup with steaming water (yeah, I know, honey's not exactly raw after that, but all we have here is raw honey), stir well, and sip. It's very soothing.

Also, if you stir raw apple cider vinegar (1-2 TBS) into a cup of cold water and drink it every couple of hours, it will relieve your cold symptoms and actually shorten your cold. At least, that's what it does for us. YMMV, of course. My kids mix the ACV with raw honey before adding the water, but I just take it unsweetened.

[Jingerbread]

8 hours ago, THERetroGamerNY said:

 

Noooooooooo!

I don't want Erika to be right about something! LOL

(Good point Jingerbread though.)

Don't worry, I think she just copied and pasted stuff from other blogs.  And mostly I had a raging case of this.  

9 hours ago, OnceUponATime said:

umm... so now I'm a tad embarrassed to say this after reading all the reactions about Erika's basket, but we didn't really get stuff on Easter day. Sometimes we got one tiny chocolate Easter egg. On Easter Monday we got to go buy one big* hollow chocolate egg each when they were on mega discount in the shops. It was always spun as 'Jesus is the reason for the season' and that eggs and bunnies are heathen things so it wasn't something we did. I never quite understood the Easter craze . I do think a lot of people go a bit over the top with it all. You don't *need* 5 jellybeans after all

*probably not American big think 7-10 oz.

 

I think your family downplayed it, but Erika seems to take pride in how much she can cheap it, and the jelly beans stick out because of how she controls food so much and uses single jelly beans as payment for babysitting.  It's her overall patterns that are doing it here.

[kpmom]

10 hours ago, ILoveJellybeans said:

Is all of that in the Easter basket for all of those kids.

I absolutely spoil mine on Easter, that wouldn't even do one of my four!

Mine get a little gift bag and an Easter egg. In their little gift bag I put about 5 small, cheap toys-this year they each got a small tub of playdoh, as well as things like toy cars, little dolls, blind bags of things they collect (Minecraft minifigures, Shopkins, Moshi Monsters, Lego minifigures), little bag of tiny plastic dinosaurs, books, small plush toys etc. The little three also got a sheet of stickers with their favourite characters on (Minions, Frozen and Paw Patrol), and all four got a glow stick. I also buy a few bags of the little fun sized bags of candy like you get on Halloween, and split them between the four bags.

 

Four is not an acceptable amount of jellybeans. Even when I buy the big bags just for me, I always at least give the kids a handful.

Now why am I not surprised, given your user name, you don't agree with only 4 jelly beans per kid?! 

I love Easter and spoil my kids too.  They're pretty much grown now, but we still go all out and make 'em hunt for eggs and everything.

[Jingerbread]

9 hours ago, Screamapillar said:

I honestly think giving kids such small amounts of their own stuff makes them territorial. On Easter/Christmas/Valentine's Day/Halloween my parents would have a variety of treats for me and my brother in our own basket/stocking/what have you. They would give us more or less the same thing, but we'd always trade for our favorites. I'd give him my Skittles and he'd give me his M&Ms. Sharing and generosity among siblings! These poor Shupe children have to feel so protective of their four measly jellybeans. I do agree that it would be better to give them nothing at all than to give them a paltry four beans.

And now I want to run down to Walgreens and get some Reese's Peanut Butter Cup Eggs.....

Such a good, good point.  How can those kids learn to share, trade, or bargain if they get so little that they are protective of their rare treats?  How can they learn what their favorite things are when they get stuff so rarely that their favorite is the rare tiny treat in a blue moon? 

Do we ever hear about the Shupelettes being generous?  I know the RodKids are because they're required to share (with Jill), but we don't hear about that with any of Erika's brood.  At best, the older kids found their ten eggs, then helped the littles find their ten, but that's not sharing or trading.

8 hours ago, Screamapillar said:

I honestly think giving kids such small amounts of their own stuff makes them territorial. On Easter/Christmas/Valentine's Day/Halloween my parents would have a variety of treats for me and my brother in our own basket/stocking/what have you. They would give us more or less the same thing, but we'd always trade for our favorites. I'd give him my Skittles and he'd give me his M&Ms. Sharing and generosity among siblings! These poor Shupe children have to feel so protective of their four measly jellybeans. I do agree that it would be better to give them nothing at all than to give them a paltry four beans.

And now I want to run down to Walgreens and get some Reese's Peanut Butter Cup Eggs.....

Such a good, good point.  How can those kids learn to share, trade, or bargain if they get so little that they are protective of their rare treats?  How can they learn what their favorite things are when they get stuff so rarely that their favorite is the rare tiny treat in a blue moon? 

Do we ever hear about the Shupelettes being generous?  I know the RodKids are because they're required to share (with Jill), but we don't hear about that with any of Erika's brood.  At best, the older kids found their ten eggs, then helped the littles find their ten, but that's not sharing or trading.

[knitwit]

Well I was going to save that Cadbury Creme Egg for later, but after reading all the posts about Easter treats, instead I've nibbled off the top and am licking out the filling from inside in a way I'm sure Erika and her ilk would find a stumbling block for any nearby men.  Luckily it's just my cat, and she's a female cat anyway.

Looking at the vase and considering its dimensions, not only would a proper fishbowl be a bad idea, but that one looks like it has very little surface area exposed to the air, for oxygen to dissolve into the water.

 

[Jingerbread]

9 hours ago, Screamapillar said:

 

Quote

Withaj said:

When it's small things like jelly beans, it does seem sort of crazy, but if I were a kid, I would be jealous if my sister got 5 jelly beans and I only got 4.

That makes sense for you since you were raised to habitually count.  When I was a kid, things weren't strictly portioned.  If I had an egg with more than the egg a sibling just opened, no biggie.  The next eggs we open might had mine having less.  We knew it would probably balance out in the end, and so we could enjoy our candies because we weren't preoccupied with making sure they were exactly exact.

[defraudingjezebel]

6 minutes ago, knitwit said:

Well I was going to save that Cadbury Creme Egg for later, but after reading all the posts about Easter treats, instead I've nibbled off the top and am licking out the filling from inside in a way I'm sure Erika and her ilk would find a stumbling block for any nearby men.  Luckily it's just my cat, and she's a female cat anyway.

Looking at the vase and considering its dimensions, not only would a proper fishbowl be a bad idea, but that one looks like it has very little surface area exposed to the air, for oxygen to dissolve into the water.

 

Plus, Erika would rebuke you for eating it in such a way that might cause a "mess." A mess, by Erika's definition, is caused by any speck of crumb that falls off. 

[Burpies]

Sorry you're all sick. I like your approach better than hers.

Something we do with yucky colds is to squeeze the juice of half a lemon into a cup, add a good dollop of raw honey, fill the cup with steaming water (yeah, I know, honey's not exactly raw after that, but all we have here is raw honey), stir well, and sip. It's very soothing.

Also, if you stir raw apple cider vinegar (1-2 TBS) into a cup of cold water and drink it every couple of hours, it will relieve your cold symptoms and actually shorten your cold. At least, that's what it does for us. YMMV, of course. My kids mix the ACV with raw honey before adding the water, but I just take it unsweetened.

If you add cayenne to the honey/lemon/hot water mixture it can really really shorten your cold. It's hard to get down, but if you drink it two or three times a day when you're sick, it really helps. As an example, my husband and I got sick at the same time and I started drinking the drink right away, but he refuses to even try it. I was only mildly sick for two days. He was sick for two weeks and ended up on an antibiotic. Everyone I suggest this drink to has been a convert. One work acquaintance's husband's was so thrilled with the drink, he instructed her to give me a big hug the next work day!

[AliceInFundyland]

My mom also would steep in straight ginger. Not just for tummy trouble. She, and therefore I, like it for all ailments. And sometimes randomly.

[Shiny]

What is with this lady, seriously? I admit, I am a horrible Scrooge when it comes to holidays and celebrations. I'm constantly getting crotchety about all these damn Pinterest-level celebrations. And don't get me started on that damn Elf. BUT when I saw the basket with the store bought cookies, I had a legit physical reaction. I get not wanting to go overboard, but that just looks like not caring...no effort at all. 

There are lot of families we discuss here that are more corrupt than this one, but Erika is one of my least favorites. She just doesn't seem to enjoy any of this. And she always talks about how much harder things are with more kids. Well, stop fucking having kids if it's so hard. Give the ones who already have a better quality of life. 

[imokit]

7 hours ago, Jingerbread said:

That makes sense for you since you were raised to habitually count.  When I was a kid, things weren't strictly portioned.  If I had an egg with more than the egg a sibling just opened, no biggie.  The next eggs we open might had mine having less.  We knew it would probably balance out in the end, and so we could enjoy our candies because we weren't preoccupied with making sure they were exactly exact.

My sisters are twins.  They live in a house with plenty, they don't go hungry, they get treats (more than 4 jelly beans).  But OMG do they eye each other.  Since about age 4 its been she got more than me/her piece is bigger than mine, she's having thirds but I've not had a chance for seconds yet - its endless and they're still at it at 12.

 

They were NOT taught to count (food - the maths side of counting was taught and encouraged), but they still do it.  There is no need to do so, and we try to do it like you, try to explain that things are equallish and will balance out, but they won't have it.

But sometimes sibling rivalry happens.

 

I can theoretically see the need, especially with twins to count out Jelly beans, but not 4, there's not point in 4.  They sell small boxes, that would work, or a big enough handful, that you'd get away without counting.

 

For the record, the twins do get along, they just use fairness and counting as a way to legitimise bickering [rolleyes]

 

Also - bigger people - should equal more candy. Portion size should be affected by age.  Giving the Karen the same amount as the twins is mean, when you take size of stomachs into account, the amount of her stomach filled will be a lot smaller than the twins if the physical mass of sweets is the same.

[Jingerbread]

58 minutes ago, imokit said:

My sisters are twins.  They live in a house with plenty, they don't go hungry, they get treats (more than 4 jelly beans).  But OMG do they eye each other.  Since about age 4 its been she got more than me/her piece is bigger than mine, she's having thirds but I've not had a chance for seconds yet - its endless and they're still at it at 12.

My parents had the solution to this.  One sibling split something, and the other got to choose.  A couple months of that ended our short-term rivalry when we had one since we got tired of standing there with a can of soda and carefully making sure the cups were perfectly exact so the other could choose.  I remember my dad standing there in the doorway to the kitchen watching me, and he said that the time it wastes making sure everything is exactly even means less time to enjoy anything, and this is why he wasn't going to be the one catering to our petty bullshit about making sure everything is split to the last drop, and that was when I got it.  

So I don't think parents should be the ones to have to divvy perfectly.  Let the kids do that.  Let one twin dish the ice cream and the other choose.  Let one twin cut a couple pieces of cake, and the other choose.

[Apricot]

20 hours ago, sawasdee said:

Easter egg chocolate in the UK always tasted different than 'usual' chocolate, and I really liked it. Can't get good chocolate in Asia* - it has an additive to stop it melting, which leaves your mouth feeling all greasy.

* Except Ferrero Rocher and Guidan. Even Lindt seems to have the added chemical......Cadbury's, great in the UK, is meeah here.

Cadburys in the UK is no longer as great as it once was.  Since it was bought out by Kraft, they seem to have added something to it which makes it disgusting.

WRT to sharing, my parents did the same as @Jingerbread, it worked great I think.  I think too much emphasis on everything being exactly fair is wrong. 

 

Also - why should the older girls get the same as the younger girls?  My two daughters will get different eggs at easter and my eldest will probably be allowed to eat slightly more of hers at a time because my youngest is still a toddler and will probably make herself sick if I allowed free rein.  We ration out the eggs for a number of weeks as last year my children had over 20 eggs each due to Easter egg hunts at home and at both sets of grandparents houses!

[anachronistic]

I feel so sorry for the Shupe kids.  I was looking over some of her past blog posts and she had this list of activities for toddlers/preschoolers, and she said that if she put out 3 activities 1 day and 1 wasn't played with, it reappeared a day or two later.  She doesn't trust kids to make any of their own choices.  What is so wrong with having a favorite toy that you want to play with day after day?  It shows a developmental need for that particular kind of play at that moment.  But no, you must wait until it comes around again on the list.

[umsami]

We're Muslim and my kids get more Easter candy than hers.

 

 

[Iokaste]

I realize that this is culturally different and that what might seem extravagent to some, is perfectly normal to others and so what some middle class kids, with evil lax Lutheran parents are given for Easter in some far-off, cold, mini country in Scandinavia is really of no concern or comparison to the Shupe kids or their friends, but to me and my friends the usual Easter-treat was a decorated cardboard-egg, with a handful of candy, a couple of chocolates and maybe a little money.
Grandparents might give us a large-ish chocolate bunny and there might be a tray of goodies for the family to share. 

I guess what I'm trying to say is that, the amount of candy given to each child in the Shupe family really doesn't strike me as particularly small or insufficient, and if it hadn't been for the mega-restricted life we know they live, I don't think I'd have thought anything of it. 

Editing because I apparently am not over my International Women's Day hangover enough to write in a second language...

[Eternalbluepearl]

36 minutes ago, anachronistic said:

I feel so sorry for the Shupe kids.  I was looking over some of her past blog posts and she had this list of activities for toddlers/preschoolers, and she said that if she put out 3 activities 1 day and 1 wasn't played with, it reappeared a day or two later.  She doesn't trust kids to make any of their own choices.  What is so wrong with having a favorite toy that you want to play with day after day?  It shows a developmental need for that particular kind of play at that moment.  But no, you must wait until it comes around again on the list.

To me, it's kind of like she views her house as a daycare rather than her own family. I'm not quite sure how to say it but the rotating activities for the little kids every so many minutes with the bigger kids setting them up. It makes me think like she has a home daycare where Melanie and Karen are the (unpaid) employees and Erika is the director. There's an impersonal feeling about it. I'm not saying it right. 

[Iokaste]

10 minutes ago, Eternalbluepearl said:

To me, it's kind of like she views her house as a daycare rather than her own family. I'm not quite sure how to say it but the rotating activities for the little kids every so many minutes with the bigger kids setting them up. It makes me think like she has a home daycare where Melanie and Karen are the (unpaid) employees and Erika is the director. There's an impersonal feeling about it. I'm not saying it right. 

Seriously, I think she is bored. Plain and simple. She is an educated woman who doesn't live and have not lived as sheltered a life as some of the other fundies. She has a real degree and she isn't stupid. She's put so many restrictions on herself and her family that so many of the interests she appears to have: literatur, history, cooking, psychology, travels, etc., can only be enjoyed in very small and insufficient amounts and through so many "holy" corrections that they actually become fallacies. 
To combat the boredom she invents all of these rules and sets up her house allmost like a business.

Erika, (we know you read this) I actually like you and if I lived down the road I'm sure we would have an occasional cup of fat-free hot cocoa and actually enjoy friendly disagreement on theology and religion.   

[seasonsoflife]

24 minutes ago, Iokaste said:

Seriously, I think she is bored. Plain and simple. She is an educated woman who doesn't live and have not lived as sheltered a life as some of the other fundies. She has a real degree and she isn't stupid. She's put so many restrictions on herself and her family that so many of the interests she appears to have: literatur, history, cooking, psychology, travels, etc., can only be enjoyed in very small and insufficient amounts and through so many "holy" corrections that they actually become fallacies. 
To combat the boredom she invents all of these rules and sets up her house allmost like a business.

Erika, (we know you read this) I actually like you and if I lived down the road I'm sure we would have an occasional cup of fat-free hot cocoa and actually enjoy friendly disagreement on theology and religion.   

That is the thing...I think one of the reasons I dislike her so much is the fact that she IS educated (I don't think she is particularly smart, though she is resourceful, I'll give her that). The fundies that I feel less sympathy for are the ones that were given choices and real educations and purposely choose to take that away from their own children. They chose that path, but they imposed it to their children.

Also, I just find her incredibly annoying *gag* *vomit* *face palm*, but that is just me. We all have our favorite and least favorite snarkees.

[zee_four]

On 3/9/2016 at 8:21 AM, seasonsoflife said:

 Thanks.

i learned as a kid and then was in the US for 18 months as an adult, that really helped me polish it.

J1? We have toonnnsss of J1 Argie students where I'm from. It makes up for all the seasonal Aussie workers that can't get H2B visas anymore.

[seasonsoflife]

1 minute ago, zee_four said:

J1? We have toonnnsss of J1 Argie students where I'm from. It makes up for all the seasonal Aussie workers that can't get H2B visas anymore.

Yes  

I was in the East Coast though.

[zee_four]

Just now, seasonsoflife said:

Yes  

I was in the East Coast though.

I honestly thought all Argentinean uni students came and worked in ski towns. Especially my Colorado ski town ha ha.

 

[seasonsoflife]

Just now, zee_four said:

I honestly thought all Argentinean uni students came and worked in ski towns. Especially my Colorado ski town ha ha.

 

Yeah, that is more the "work and travel" program a lot of students do. They are usually shorter stays I think.

I did it in my late twenties. I am in arts administration and went to work in a theatre. It was a great experience.