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Lori Alexander never learning since 2011 - part 6


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I wonder if her and Ken are finally angling for a valid ministry. She seems to be against women mixing marriage advice and theology, but all the mainstream women's ministry folk do exactly that. The problem is they are too devoted to Michael Pearl to be successful. Even most conservative and fundie lite draw the line with her odd theology. She doesn't dress modestly enough or have a conservative enough family life to get into true fundie churches that spout the Pearls' junk. 

I am thrilled that even her odd ball commenters are not biting at her recent posts. I wonder how many of her usual readers had their husbands read her theology posts, and they told their wives she is full of crap. Or they are starting to see that she will not take any criticism on her interpretations. Hopefully she keeps it up and this new stuff is her downfall. 

Hmmm...maybe she is doing that to position herself to write a book. I could see her putting out some queries and being told that she needs to provide more bible context than just Proverbs 31, Titus 2, and Ephesians 5.

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I'm starting to wonder if they are just not posting comments that they are getting so no one can know for sure just how many people there are against them. Because they do moderate prior to the posts being made public (at least that is what they say at the bottom). I'm finding it hard to believe no one is posting any sort of comment, positive or not.

 

 

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Always Learning Facebook:

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"In our culture, inordinate emphasis is placed on physical appearance, sometimes to the detriment of concern for spiritual well-being. We are more focused on looking good than being good and doing good! {Stuart Briscoe} Are you more concerned with looking good OR being good and doing good?

Is this the same woman who posted the following?

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Christian women need to be told the truth about men ~

Men are attracted to youth and looks. This is normal. Men are not evil, base or perverted for being attracted to youth and beauty. Young Christian girl, if you are not getting approached or asked out, it’s probably because you’re not attractive enough, you’re not nice enough or you’re not available enough. You need to work on this. You need to lose weight, grow your hair out, wear nice clothes and some decent makeup. You might be a b****, and if you are, you need to be nicer. If you really want to find a man and marry, then you need to get serious about it while you’re young. 

Both are quotes from other people (heaven forbid she write anything original), but she posted both of them just as sure as sunshine.

One of the comments replying to the Facebook post is funny though:

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I recently had an older, Christian woman tell me, "You BETTER dye your hair! You do NOT want gray hair!!" She was totally serious. My hair is long, curly, and starting to get grays. I do not mind them. I heard Elisabeth Elliot speak highly of gray hair! So this older woman (who dyes her hair the same color she had when she was 20, and, mught I add, is extremely vain, unfortunately) obviously believes I ought to care more about how youthful I look.

:pb_lol: It's hilarious because she thinks she's agreeing with Lori, but Lori has said several times that she dyes her hair.

Lori:

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 I have gray hair that I have to dye every three weeks.

 

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When hating sex becomes sin.
Lori:

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I mentor women who hate sex, never give their husbands sex, don't move during sex, use any excuse to avoid it, etc. Did you know that all of these are sin?

:562479351e8d1_wtf(2):

 

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13 minutes ago, OnceUponATime said:

When hating sex becomes sin.
Lori:

:562479351e8d1_wtf(2):

 

That's insanely fucked up. So, women who are raised from birth to think that sex is dirty, bad and sinful, who are taught that instilling men's desires will send them to hell, who are not allowed any sort of experimentation with anything even remotly sexual prior to marriage and who marry men with little to no sexual experience and who don't expect them to find pleasure in the act don't like sex? Shocking. But of course it's not the teachings and culture that are to blame.  It's just those evil women, sinning again. They just can't win. 

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Lori:

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I mentor women who hate sex, never give their husbands sex, don't move during sex, use any excuse to avoid it, etc. Did you know that all of these are sin? Did you know that when you do this you are blaspheming the Word of God since God commands that you love your husband and this it the highest form of love towards your husband?

I want the scripture reference for the verse that says sex is the highest form of love towards your husband.  I am sick of her making shit up and passing it off as scripture to women who don't have the sense to know better.

In Lori's immature mind, ALL men= sex crazed maniacs.  Thankfully, that is not the case.

Also, Lori should stop gossiping about the women she "mentors".  
 

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Hey, I'm way past menopause at 57 years old and I could have all types of excuses with all of my health problems, but I don't because I love Ken and want to please him in this area. I want him to be happy.

Ken?  This is a jab at you.  And it's not discreet, so there's that.

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In closing, women ask me what is acceptable in the marriage bed. Everything is acceptable unless it clearly violates God's Word such as porn or anything harmful such as anal sex. Anal sex is a homosexual act and no normal man or woman desires this. The use of pornography has increased this abomination. It is a filthy practice and medically dangerous.* I had no idea married couples even wanted to have anal sex until a few years ago!

:pb_rollseyes:

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Thou shalt move during sex is in the bible?  Seriously?

Lori, you've gone off the deep end.

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8 minutes ago, kpmom said:

Thou shalt move during sex is in the bible?  Seriously?

Lori, you've gone off the deep end.

It's the 11th commandment:  Thou shalt not lie still during intercourse.

Also in Leviticus:  It is an abomination before the LORD to lieth still during intercourse.

Seriously, look it up.

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She is in the slow but steady process of creating her own religion, staring herself as God of the Universe.  I have noticed that she slips in her own rules more and more lately, and usually follows it by reminding her readers that if they disagree, they are disagreeing with God.

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Man is driven to succeed. Hormones drive him to be the best at work, to drive aggressively, to build the best buildings {praise God for men!}, or write a musical piece. But his most pressing drive is to be a successful lover.*

Wouldn't a "successful lover" be one who brings his wife sexual fulfillment as he seeks it for himself??
 

As I recall, Michael Pearl's idea of "success" is raping his wife five times on their wedding night in an attempt to out sex his recently married buddy.

The only good thing about this post is imagining Ken waiting by the keyboard, flexing his fingers, breathing heavily and eagerly reading the comments as he waits to respond. 

 

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11 minutes ago, usmcmom said:

The only good thing about this post is imagining Ken waiting by the keyboard, flexing his fingers, breathing heavily and eagerly reading the comments as he waits to respond. 

 

:puke-front:

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1 hour ago, usmcmom said:

Wouldn't a "successful lover" be one who brings his wife sexual fulfillment as he seeks it for himself??
 

As I recall, Michael Pearl's idea of "success" is raping his wife five times on their wedding night in an attempt to out sex his recently married buddy.

The only good thing about this post is imagining Ken waiting by the keyboard, flexing his fingers, breathing heavily and eagerly reading the comments as he waits to respond. 

 

Yes.  If a man were a successful lover, his wife would not just be lying there taking it and hoping it would end soon.  It would not be the man whose wife tells others "all you need is 10 minutes and some lube (though I am old and understand the lube thing) and it would not be the man who discusses how many times he had sex with his bride, much less admitting the gorey details.

 

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I'm just going to leave this here in case Lori starts deleting. Bolding mine.

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Ann · 1 hour ago

But his most pressing drive is to be a successful lover.* When a woman refuses to please her man in this area, she is disobeying God's clearly stated Word .

I'm not sure that this is Biblical. Sexual response is involuntary. While she can join him in bed and be open to having a good experience how much sexual pleasure she receives isn't something that either of them can necessarily control. If she has not denied him sex then she is not in sin. Not being turned on by him isn't a sin but he can't be a successful lover if she isn't turned on by him.

 

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6 minutes ago, usmcmom said:

I'm just going to leave this here in case Lori starts deleting. Bolding mine.

 

I'd love it if that commenter turned out to be Cabinetman's wife. I can't remember her name for the life of me. I keep wanting to say "Angela", but I know that's wrong. I dismiss the thought, then my brain helpfully offers up "Wasn't her name Angela?" 

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1 minute ago, littlemommy said:

I'd love it if that commenter turned out to be Cabinetman's wife. I can't remember her name for the life of me. I keep wanting to say "Angela", but I know that's wrong. I dismiss the thought, then my brain helpfully offers up "Wasn't her name Angela?" 

I'm not sure, but I want to say it's Amanda.

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This is the verse that Lori references in her post, yet I don't think she actually presents the entire verse.

1 Corinthians 7:3-5King James Version (KJV)

3 Let the husband render unto the wife due benevolence: and likewise also the wife unto the husband.

4 The wife hath not power of her own body, but the husband: and likewise also the husband hath not power of his own body, but the wife.

5 Defraud ye not one the other, except it be with consent for a time, that ye may give yourselves to fasting and prayer; and come together again, that Satan tempt you not for your incontinency.

Nowhere in this verse does it say that a man's sexual desire is more important than a woman's, which is how Lori and her ilk always talk about it.  Also, nowhere in this verse are specific instructions given on just HOW a woman is to please her husband.  There is no command for movement (or lack thereof) or enthusiasm.  It is likely to be inferred that each spouse, out of love for the other, will strive to make it pleasurable for the other and, in so doing, will receive heightened pleasure themselves.  That's what love is all about. When a man approaches his wife and reminds her that the Bible commands her to do this....of course she's not going to enjoy sex!!

Finally:
 

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When a woman just allows, cooperates, and tolerates, it leaves a man feeling sick at heart.*

If this is happening...sigh...he's just not doing it right! How many times must we tell these men this?!?

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I see the woman who comments about her man not wanting sex. Lori says divorce is not allowed! You must have a hardened heart to even be considering it, is the implication. Her comment is void of empathy of course. Now if a man said this it would be "I'm sooooooo sorry". I am so sick of the double standard.

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Someone's bullshit meter went off:

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But his most pressing drive is to be a successful lover.* When a woman refuses to please her man in this area, she is disobeying God's clearly stated Word . 

I'm not sure that this is Biblical. Sexual response is involuntary. While she can join him in bed and be open to having a good experience how much sexual pleasure she receives isn't something that either of them can necessarily control. If she has not denied him sex then she is not in sin. Not being turned on by him isn't a sin but he can't be a successful lover if she isn't turned on by him.

Another reader replies...something about starfish sex :pb_confused: Never heard of that.  Maybe I don't get out enough:

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"how much sexual pleasure she receives isn't something that either of them can necessarily control. If she has not denied him sex then she is not in sin. Not being turned on by him isn't a sin but he can't be a successful lover if she isn't turned on by him." 

I do think that how much sexual pleasure she receives is something that she can control eventually with sex therapy, counseling, or just a patient attitude and seeking knowledge about her own body and orgasms. There are wives out there who had traumatic sex experiences in their past (raped even as a child!) but I've talked with them and learned that for their husband's benefit, they worked hard to get over their hangups with sex so that they could learn to enjoy it with them. 

When a wife just has sex with her husband because he wants it and she submits to him in that, a lot of times she only gives him duty sex, which if she's not enjoying it or mentally into it with him, is not beneficial for the marriage relationship. Men sometimes call this kind of duty sex (where she's not mentally into it) as "star fish" sex, because she just lays there and has no passion, no embracing him, etc. 

You would think this isn't a sin, and I'm not sure it is either, but it IS actually a rejection of him to give him star fish sex. He wants his wife to have sex with him, but when she just lays there and doesn't enjoy it or even try to enjoy it, she isn't MENTALLY having sex with him - she is allowing him to USE her body, something that most married men who love their wives absolutely hate to feel like they're doing. They don't want to use their wife, they want to have sex with their wife - but "with" means they want her mentally, emotionally, even spiritually INVOLVED in it. :)

The Godly Mentor has yet to reply.

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@usmcmom they always forget verse 6 "But I speak this by permission, and not of commandment." Paul in that passage was most definitely addressing a particular problem that there was in that particular church at that particular moment. (verse 1 - 2 for a bit of context "Now concerning the things whereof ye wrote unto me: It is good for a man not to touch a woman.  Nevertheless, to avoid fornication, let every man have his own wife, and let every woman have her own husband.")

 

 

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1 hour ago, usmcmom said:

I'm just going to leave this here in case Lori starts deleting. Bolding mine.

 

So sorry! I didn't see your post before I made mine!!

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45 minutes ago, Koala said:

Someone's bullshit meter went off:

Another reader replies...something about starfish sex :pb_confused: Never heard of that.  Maybe I don't get out enough:

 

I definitely don't get out enough, but I don't think I'd use the term "starfish sex." Perhaps "exhausted wife who spent the day homeschooling 10 children" sex would be more accurate. Or, "submissive wife who has to ask me when she wants money to buy a coffee" sex. Seriously, how could these women be in the mood for anything with the lives they lead?

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I've heard the term starfish before; it's when you lie on your back with your arms and legs spread out (as opposed to embracing or touching your partner.) It doesn't necessarily mean you're unenthusiastic or tired. In Japan, they use the term "tuna" (maguro) for the same thing.

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Anal sex is a homosexual act and no normal man or woman desires this. The use of pornography has increased this abomination. It is a filthy practice and medically dangerous.* I had no idea married couples even wanted to have anal sex until a few years ago!

Au contraire Lori, my butthole is a special gift I'm saving for the husband God has picked out for me, and I'm proud to keep it pure and virginal until my wedding night, when I will joyfully share it with my Prince Charming just as Jesus intended~*~

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54 minutes ago, Koala said:

So sorry! I didn't see your post before I made mine!!

Pffft! No big deal.  Sometimes the crazy needs to be reposted as often as possible.

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