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The One Where Ken Alexander Offers to Coach The Donald.


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I am crying now.  If this was a post, it would be: The One Where Ken Offers to Coach The Donald.

The fist part of the post is a breakdown of all of the things Ken doesn't like about Trump.  I'll put the highlights in bold:

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As I watched the last debate, I wondered to myself, “What in the world am I missing in Donald Trump that some evangelicals see in him?"  Maybe what I am missing is values. Christian values are not something to be talked about or aspired to, but to be actually lived out before the world to see. Tell me, Christian evangelical leaders who support the Donald, do pride, name calling, demeaning and belittling of others look Christian to you? And if not, is there some sort of scale that you use for Donald Trump’s values that allows you to balance out his regular violation of grace, kindness, goodness, and self-control? Tell me, which of the fruits of the Spirit Mr. Trump has displayed in his run for office that the evangelical community should be supporting him?  

 

Let’s be real here Christian, and let’s stop a second and think about what some of you, our brothers and sisters in Christ, are doing when you support Trump. You are saying to yourself that the need for change in our country and its political direction allows you to vote for a man who holds few, if any, of your common values. Would you do such nasty stuff to someone that the Donald is regularly doing to anyone who questions him or calls him out? Wow, if you did it on national TV you would probably expect one of your church elders coming to your door to tell you that you are in sin, and you need to repent.

 

Is the desire for change in America, and a desire to restore conservatism, so enticing that you would eat the apple of a fruit that is proving daily a lack of some of the most basic values of common human decency? You don’t even need to judge Mr. Trump by God’s values, even common sense values teach us to be decent with others and clearly the Donald is not. And this is the man you want as President? Doesn’t it scare you to think what he may do to tick off a world that is learning to hate America?

 

Where in the Bible does it give the Christian license to throw out values in an effort to restore values? Is it not troubling to you that the man who many want to curtail abortions, protect Christianity and build consensus is the same man twice divorced, and taken four companies into bankruptcy. And he is proud that he used the system to his advantage to not keep his financial commitments. 

 

Then there many promises without substance. Tell me, how we are going to balance the budget Mr. Trump, and give health care for those who can’t afford it while canning Obamacare. We will have lots of jobs, lots of jobs!  We will build a great wall, which is now ten feet higher than last week, just because a former President of Mexico calls Mr. Trump on it? WOW! What happens when Mr. Putin or some other leader calls Mr. Trump a buffoon? Will there be 20% more missiles aimed at Russia?

 

The world is watching Mr. Trump and his antics and they are laughing while at the same time scared to death of what this man is capable of saying and doing. Hey wait, that is you and me also, laughing while we watch a circus takes place, yet sacred to death that this man has the potential to be our next "Christian" President. And he will have been put there by Christians. Are we really that far along in the demise of the Church that we will allow a "Christian" who cannot give us any meaningful discussion on what it means to walk in the Spirit, or worse yet, has never had to ask for forgiveness because he can’t recall ever being wrong? Yes, this is accurate from Mr. Trump himself that he has NEVER asked for forgiveness. Hmm, Bible 101.  Yet he may be sitting in the White House as our representative, because we decided that winning the prize was an acceptable reason to allow a regular violation of Christian values.

Now wait for it:

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Listen, I am not saying I may not vote for Trump over Hillary if it comes down to that choice. 

:pb_lol:  Horrible, horrible man- but if it's between a horrible man and a woman, Ken will take the horrible man any day.

The solution:

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And Mr. Trump, if you are reading this, please get into the Word and grow up in your Christian faith in these areas. Use self-control and control your tongue. Stop going after a Christian brother’s genetic profuse sweating to try to disqualify him as a candidate.

Of course he's reading!  I am sure The Godly Mentor is at the top of his list. Just think how excited he'll be when he sees that yet another post has been dedicated to NOT complaining (it's satanic you know) about him!

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Mr. Trump, you are welcome in my church and in my home, unless of course you see me as a nasty liar who you would rather belittle than to build a good Christian relationship together. Change your ways, apologize to those who you have offended, and live out your faith, even if somewhat imperfectly. Then let’s see what the Lord can do with such a man who truly is sold out for Jesus, and is willing to show it with his life, and words, especially towards those who oppose him.

 

I am open to discussing this with you Mr. Trump, or coaching you on what a Christian should be like, if you want to return the email I sent to you about this four months ago when you started your campaign. I had such hope, but exactly what I feared has come true. You are winning, but you are losing my heart and the hearts of the remnant who may not be able to vote at all in the fall because we don’t know which Donald we can follow. The one who shows great leadership stature or the one who acts like he is back in junior high? Will the real Mr. Trump please stand up, or is greatness and a stunted personal growth all mixed together in the man they call the Donald?

This is definitely the funnies thing Ken has ever "helped written" on Lori's blog.

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LOL, the trump post!  This is what has really been bothering them...that its been 4 months and Trump hasn't responded to them! How dare he ignore the Alexanders?!!  Lori reminds me of Hyacinth Bucket from "Keeping up Appearances", if anyone knows that british show. Always thinking they are more important than they are. 

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If you guys remember, he wanted to invite Josh Duggar to dinner too. 

I can just picture Ken and Lori sitting around in the evenings.

Ken:  What are you doing Lori?

Lori: Oh, God commanded me to write another letter to Anna Duggar.  Why, what are you doing?

Ken:  I still haven't heard back from The Donald, so I am going to send him another letter.  Are you sure you mailed my last one?  If we're going to set up coaching sessions in time for the election, I am going to need to get him over for dinner soon!  

By the way, what is for dinner?

Lori:  A Big Salad.  I spent hours making it.

 

:pb_rollseyes:

 

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59 minutes ago, AlwaysDiscerning said:

LOL, the trump post!  This is what has really been bothering them...that its been 4 months and Trump hasn't responded to them! How dare he ignore the Alexanders?!!  Lori reminds me of Hyacinth Bucket from "Keeping up Appearances", if anyone knows that british show. Always thinking they are more important than they are. 

Except in the case of Hyacinth, I think she really did have a good heart underneath all that affectation. Lori, otoh, is just mean. 

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Staffer to Donald Trump  "We have a another letter/email from the guy whose wife has that blog who is offering to coach you on acting more Christian."

"Do I need to act more Christian? All the suckers are eating out of my hand, and unless this guy has more pull than an endorsement from Jerry Falwell Jr and Franklin Graham.   Wait.. does he have a lot of cash to buy ads in CA?"

"No, here's a link to the blog"

Oh  Well, his wife's no Heidi Klum.... he must like them old.  Wait.... his dancer daughter is almost as sexy as my daughter.    How old is Melania now.... her use by date must be getting nearly close.... maybe I could meet his daughter. "

"He is reiterating his knowledge of Christian values and his experience as a business consultant. "

"What's the rundown on that."

"Well, no one should ever get a divorce, women shouldn't work and be submissive to their husbands  he specifically mentions your bankruptcies..  Oh, and his specialty is scheduling for dental practices."

"Send him a bumper sticker and the "Thanks for your support" email and I'll call him if I decide to open a dental practice--but if we are in the same city as his daughter, let me know." 

 

The truth is this conversation never happened.  There are certainly dozens of staffers acting as gatekeepers keeping the messages from weirdos and potential stalkers in files in case a serious potential problem arises.  In olden days, my sister was an aide for a congressman and helped read mail... before 9-11 and anthrax scares when it was real letters.  They had files for the nutters. 

Most likely, Ken's offer of help was laughed at by a few low level staffers and stashed in an archive file.

 

 

 

 

 

 

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This one was just too good to be buried pages deep in a mega thread.

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Oh, so sweet!  this quote by John Oliver describes Trump and Ken well:  "Bored sociopath(s) with finger free anus(es)" 

1 minute ago, RosyDaisy said:

As if Donald Trub wil ever read that email. Stupid, stupid Ken.

And the aforementioned Mr. Oliver revealed that Trump's family name was "Drumpf"  before a prescient ancestor changed it some years back---

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To be fair, when I email a billionaire/presidential candidate and he/she doesn't respond, I get a little miffed too. I mean, COME ON! If I'd taken the time to invite them to church AND dinner, then taken the time to argue with my spouse about whether to serve meatloaf or chicken parmesan (Because HE'S GONNA COME TO OUR HOUSE, I just know it!!!), I'd be totally ticked off that I'd wasted all my time. Geesh, don't these people know WHO I AM?!?

:laughing-rolling::laughing-rolling::laughing-rolling:

 

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:omg::56247958035f1_32(18):

this is gold! Thank you for this!!

ps: ot, but where do you guys find this smiley which is rolling on the floor laughing?

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Lori's blog is supposed to be for women about marriage and family as as a response to Titus 2. It really ticks me off when Ken posts even about those topics. In the worldview claimed by the blog, it is inappropriate for a man to step into this role. Even though I disagree with Lori, I do acknowledge that she is doing what she thinks the God of the Universe has commanded her to do. (I roll my eyes even as I type that.) Within that paradigm, though, it is just plain wrong for Ken to use Lori's Titus 2 blog as a platform for his political rants.

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12 minutes ago, Sundaymorning said:

:omg::56247958035f1_32(18):

this is gold! Thank you for this!!

ps: ot, but where do you guys find this smiley which is rolling on the floor laughing?

Click on the smilies icon and then on categories (small on the right upper corner),  from the list click on "old not use" and be prepared to wade through hundreds of smilies.

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:pb_lol: I am imaging the conversation Ken & Lori's family is having behing their backs - wondering how to take the internet away from them. Like you someday have to take away Grandma's car keys. It just isn't safe to allow them to email or blog anymore.

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This is just too funny! Ken really thinks that Trump would take advice from HIM! Oh Ken, I feel embarrassed for you that you actually posted this. 

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18 minutes ago, Sundaymorning said:

:omg::56247958035f1_32(18):

this is gold! Thank you for this!!

ps: ot, but where do you guys find this smiley which is rolling on the floor laughing?

I clicked on the "find emoticons" space and typed in "laughing," and it popped up right away.

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18 minutes ago, Florita said:

:pb_lol: I am imaging the conversation Ken & Lori's family is having behing their backs - wondering how to take the internet away from them. Like you someday have to take away Grandma's car keys. It just isn't safe to allow them to email or blog anymore.

I really feel for sane family members of fundies. Especially if said fundies choose to embarrass themselves like this on the internet. I bet their family members really hope that none of their work colleagues or friends ever stumble upon Lori's blog.

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Quote

 Are we really that far along in the demise of the Church that we will allow a "Christian" who cannot give us any meaningful discussion on what it means to walk in the Spirit, or worse yet, has never had to ask for forgiveness because he can’t recall ever being wrong? Yes, this is accurate from Mr. Trump himself that he has NEVER asked for forgiveness. Hmm, Bible 101.  

So, kind of like Ken, actually. 

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AKA: The One Where I Like Ken FUCKING Alexander for a Split Second.

God fucking dammit Trump. When I think that Ken is a better man than you, something is wrong!

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We totally need Coaching The Don as a user title :pb_lol: 

Or better yet, we need his and her user titles.  For His: Coaching the Future President

For Her: Speaking for The God of the Universe

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On 2/28/2016 at 1:28 PM, AlwaysDiscerning said:

LOL, the trump post!  This is what has really been bothering them...that its been 4 months and Trump hasn't responded to them! How dare he ignore the Alexanders?!!  Lori reminds me of Hyacinth Bucket from "Keeping up Appearances", if anyone knows that british show. Always thinking they are more important than they are. 

"...*Bouquet* residence, lady of the house speaking..."

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