Gallery of Narcissist Fundies

[PennySycamore]

@CloakNDagger, maybe they don't know that blue was for the Federal troops. The Confederate troops wore gray.  They might think the the Rebs wore caps as "blue as the Bonnie Blue Flag" to quote Melanie from GWTW.

[iweartanktops]

On 2/23/2016 at 5:52 AM, Gimme a Free RV said:

Whoa.

Wait!

What??

There are other fundie families who changed the family name?  I'd love to know why.  I wonder if it has to do with stepping away from generational sins, a desire to be disassociated from the husband's secular family he grew up in, or what?

The fundies I'm related to changed their last name! It was a word they felt was inappropriate, so they added letters to the end! 

On 2/25/2016 at 11:30 AM, HerNameIsBuffy said:

I am rarely speechless but this did it for a minute...

I know fundies and their ilk are afraid of questioning, and really work hard to keep their kids from developing critical thinking skills...but I've never seen one come right out and say it before.  

WTF?

Oh, and....

How the hell would she know?  I really don't think he's talking to her about me.

So I have a question...this whole "God told me" thing - everyone from her to Steve Maxwell to almost everyone we discuss here seems to have a direct line to him.  Like he sends them emails or something.  Do they actually hear what they think is God?  Like just taking a shower or brushing their teeth and a deep voice out of nowhere starts telling them that Pepsi is an idol and ignorance is the key to happiness or whatnot?  Or is it just their certainty about their own convictions is interpreted as a message from God.

Because I think I'm pretty right about things but I don't assume God is co-signing any of it...I just figure I either am right or kind of arrogant in that moment.  

So not snarking - are they hearing voices or just mistaking their own hubris for supernatural declarations of fact?

 

 

I wonder about this, too. My SIL says that God told her she would marry my brother someday, when she was a teenager. 

I really love Mr. Tank Tops, and I think I'm going to marry him, but God didn't tell me that! 

[nickelodeon]

Was their last name "Miniskirt" or "Personal Autonomy"?

[infooverload]

So since I am tech challenged with my phone I can't figure out how to insert pictures into my posts. With this being said I got way too excited the other night when I realized Anna Sale could be Sarah Maxwell ' s doppelganger. My last doppelganger discovery was Phil Ferguson for John Schrader. Salex was awesome and loaded pictures last time, which by the way thank you.

[CloakNDagger]

@CloakNDagger, maybe they don't know that blue was for the Federal troops. The Confederate troops wore gray.  They might think the the Rebs wore caps as "blue as the Bonnie Blue Flag" to quote Melanie from GWTW.

Not possible. Do you think they never saw a VF catalog or never visited San Antonio?

[ViolaSebastian]

9 hours ago, nickelodeon said:

Was their last name "Miniskirt" or "Personal Autonomy"?

My money is on "Heck"...but I don't think adding extra letters would make it any better.

[iweartanktops]

9 hours ago, nickelodeon said:

Was their last name "Miniskirt" or "Personal Autonomy"?

I typed it and deleted it a few times! I know it will amuse you all! I really, really want to say what it was, but this is the Internet and all...

24 minutes ago, ViolaSebastian said:

My money is on "Heck"...but I don't think adding extra letters would make it any better.

Wrong. I'm so tempted! Fuck. 

[DaisyD]

Don't tell us what they changed it to. Just tell us what it was before.

[Kelsey]

37 minutes ago, iweartanktops6 said:

I typed it and deleted it a few times! I know it will amuse you all! I really, really want to say what it was, but this is the Internet and all...

Wrong. I'm so tempted! Fuck. 

You could just put what it was and not which letters they added.

 

I've always wondered how people know when God is talking to them or worse (IMO) touching them.

SA looks scary normal in his vacations pics. JR is terrifying. I went to see my sister in the hospital in June. You know what I was wearing? A ponytail, sweatpants, and a sweatshirt. In Florida, in June. The important part of the outing was to see and support my sister not look sexy in photos. 

[apandaaries]

23 hours ago, iweartanktops6 said:

I typed it and deleted it a few times! I know it will amuse you all! I really, really want to say what it was, but this is the Internet and all...

Wrong. I'm so tempted! Fuck. 

Koch?  Kock?  Hardwood?  Pusey? Dick? Beaver? Whacker?  

[iweartanktops]

32 minutes ago, amandaaries said:

Koch?  Kock?  Hardwood?  Pusey? Dick? Beaver? Whacker?  

Your guesses are cracking me up! Butt, I just can't tell.

[DaisyD]

Awesome! Now I have to figure out what you could change that to. I was going to guess Fuchs next. 

[19 cats and counting]

On 2/28/2016 at 1:02 AM, LittleSpouseOnThePrairie said:

Also this hilarious vanity selfie:

"I'm so sexy mowing the lawn"

I hope he likes mowing lawns because this will probably be his livelihood once he gets out of Jesus Jail.  

[nastyhobbitses]

28 minutes ago, 19 cats and counting said:

I hope he likes mowing lawns because this will probably be his livelihood once he gets out of Jesus Jail.  

Will he do it shirtless and defraud women to the point where they feel an uncontrollable desire to cheat on their husbands and get divorces? Like mother, like son.

[19 cats and counting]

Just now, nastyhobbitses said:

Will he do it shirtless and defraud women to the point where they feel an uncontrollable desire to cheat on their husbands and get divorces? Like mother, like son.

The thought of Josh Duggar shirtless is enough to make me lose my lunch.  Like I really need to see a fast food belly and moobs.

(Give me the in shape Bates boys any day).  

[Gobsmacked]

He will never get a job advertising Cola or any other fizzy drink. That is for certain.

[SilverBeach]

On 2/29/2016 at 11:34 PM, Kelsey said:

JR is terrifying.

THIS! I have to try to unsee her picture before I go to bed. Brain bleach maybe? 

[slickcat79]

Does anyone remember that picture from a few years back, featuring some young guys at one of Dougie's dress up events? One of them was J. Titus, Doug's heir apparent, but I don't remember who the other two were. And they looked smoking hot. 

Dammit, I need to find that.

Ha, found it:

JT Phillips and his teeth in the center, plus Darren Criss Charles Vernier on the left and Sam Turley's eyes on the right. It's a damn shame how the patriarchy fucked them up.

[Gobsmacked]

Not fundie related but I noticed a magazine today with an article about Kanye. Is he really skint?

[nickelodeon]

@slickcat79, eh, they're pretty, but just looking at them I can hear their smarmy voices calling my dad "sir" and telling him that they're going to get a job at their uncle's business as soon as they graduate so they can support me and our future family together (barf), so, neaux thank you!

[Black Aliss]

On 2/25/2016 at 11:30 AM, HerNameIsBuffy said:

So I have a question...this whole "God told me" thing - everyone from her to Steve Maxwell to almost everyone we discuss here seems to have a direct line to him.  Like he sends them emails or something.  Do they actually hear what they think is God? 

Apparently they hear him. It's a shame, really, because there are now good medications to control that, without the terrible side-effects of the first generation anti-psychotic drugs.

[slickcat79]

20 hours ago, nickelodeon said:

@slickcat79, eh, they're pretty, but just looking at them I can hear their smarmy voices calling my dad "sir" and telling him that they're going to get a job at their uncle's business as soon as they graduate so they can support me and our future family together (barf), so, neaux thank you!

Amen

[season of life]

10 minutes ago, Black Aliss said:

Apparently they hear him. It's a shame, really, because there are now good medications to control that, without the terrible side-effects of the first generation anti-psychotic drugs.

That bothers me. Like, what the hell do you mean, God talks to you? Do you hear an actual voice or did you have a dream? It's almost as bad as when they excuse their actions with, Oh, God laid it upon my heart for me to do X.

[salex]

Locally, we have more than a few people who not only Hear God, but have lengthy visits with him.
 

Quote

 

Heaven: Kansas City Style

     Aside from strange prophecies and visions, the Kansas City prophets reported visits to the supernatural realms, including heaven.  In a series of five hour-long tapes entitled Visions and Revelations, Mike Bickle and Bob Jones are heard wowing followers of the Kansas City Fellowship with all sorts of tales of their unverified experiences in the next plane.
     Bob Jones claims that when he was nine years old living in Arkansas, an angel carrying a "great trumpet" came riding down from the sky on a white horse and stopped before him in the middle of a dirt road.  He didn't know what to make of it until he was thirteen, when he was escorted to the very throne room of God in heaven.
     You say that you saw the throne room?" Bickle asked him in the dialogue.  ". . . what did it look like?"
     "It looked like gold and it looked like light and it was a light not like the light you see here which is artificial," he responded, adding that the light, the glory of the Lord, frightened him.  Well, a "guide," which he identified as "the angel of the Lord ' " protected him from danger by standing between him and the throne by filtering the rays from God as if the angel was "like red sunglasses."" He said he later understood that this was God's way of calling and commissioning him for their new important earth-changing work that could go out from America's Midwest.  Many years later, in August 1975, Bob Jones claims he had a near-death experience that was caused by a severe, painful nosebleed.  He was whisked into heaven.  Jones said:  "... all of a sudden, the pain was gone.  And I was in a dark place and I looked around and I could see  that I was in a cave and I looked down there and then my thoughts were, "Oh, Lord, did I get my robe  clean?  Did I have enough time?" And there was a man that walked beside me and he said, "You can  look now, Bob, and see" and I looked down and my robe was like crystal light." 28
     He then saw Jesus in the form of a light who would grab and kiss" men and women of different ages and then make them disappear by absorbing them into his body!  "It was like two big ole doors right here in his heart and it'd be just that, and they was gone," Jones said. "They was in his heart He then saw people that Jesus didn't want who were on "an elevator and an escalator" to hell which was like "a cold storage place." Jesus then commissioned him to touch the leaders in a new last days church so that he could absorb "a billion souls unto myself in the last day," Jones said. 29
A short time later God "came and took me out of the body," and he descended into hell.  It was "one of the most dreary, dreadful places I've ever been," Jones said.  "It was like a place like a void, it had no top, bottom or nothing you could see-it was like black auto smoke and we went deeper and deeper into the depths." 30

Mike Bickle's Visions

     In the same tape series, Bickle and Jones relate the story of an angel revealing that God would appear to Bickle in the form of another person named "Don" in a vision or in a dream.  Bickle said the vision eventually took place, and part of its message was to show him that "Jesus appears in thousands of different faces to portray something," Bickle said.  "He was trying to say, 'I'm your friend, I am your familiar friend and I'm going to show you all things so you can move in the power of the Spirit'". 31
     Later Bickle relates that during his trip to heaven Jesus commissioned him to be one of God's new generals to lead his end time army.  Although Bickle claims he met with "the Lord" face-to-face, it was an out-of-body experience.  It was 2:16 A.M. he said, and in a flash he was there, but it wasn't the cave where Jones earlier related he had been.  Instead he was standing in a 20-by 30-foot room that "had clouds on the bottom, on the top and the walls".  It was the courtroom of God.  God was in the room, Bickle said, but rather than appearing as a being of light, he was a presence that Bickle wouldn't look at.
     God rebuked him for not being patient enough in choosing leaders for his movement.  Later the being ordered Bickle to ride in a golden chariot-one of about thirty-five-in a procession of leaders, apostles, and prophets, who would be joining the movement that would someday be worldwide.  Bickle said that during the trip God did not commission him as an apostle.  But he said he understood the experience to mean that if he was faithful he would "have an opportunity in the grace of God to fill an apostolic calling." 32

 

http://www.deceptioninthechurch.com/kcp.html

This group is in tight (TIGHT) with Brownback. (they are IHOP)

Meanwhile, he spoke and hosted an big event held by this group   THe founder apparently had a long conversation with God.... and a rain miracle....

 

Quote

 

In July of 2005, God woke up a 31-year old stay-at-home mom to give her a vision for His people, revealing that He was about to move in a mighty way. His call to humility, prayer, worship, seeking Him with all of our heart, and repentance of our own personal sins was a cry for us to turn back to Him. “I am HERE!” He said. “I never left you! It is time...time to put me back in the center.” He promised that as the Body of Christ gathered together in worship, prayer, and true repentance, He would reign down His blessings and miracles in an unprecedented way. The vision very clearly showed Michael W. Smith leading worship and former President George W. Bush repenting on behalf of the nation, culminating in a movement of God's hand across America to bring healing, restoration and unprecedented unity and prosperity.

That mom, Shawn-Marie Cole, began to pray. She asked friends, family and countless intercessors to pray, and the vision was confirmed many times over—a nationwide gathering of unity for the Body of Christ was to take place. God continued to show His favor to Shawn-Marie and her father, Walt Kallestad, Senior Pastor of Community Church of Joy in Glendale, Arizona. In November 2007, God indeed called Michael W. Smith to lead worship for the event. In February 2008, Shawn-Marie and Walt were able to meet with President George W. Bush in the White House, where they shared the vision with him and extended the invitation to participate.

On April 26, 2008, from Washington, D.C. to the Capitol steps in Honolulu, every state in our country was represented by participants, and in at least ten other countries around the world, including Canada, Germany, South Africa and the Philippines, as simultaneously we worshiped our Heavenly Father and begged Him to return to the center of our lives and our nation.

Leading up to the four-hour event, a massive storm with life-threatening tornadoes, heavy rain and winds, and lightning was heading straight towards the gathering at the National Mall in D.C. The National Park Service issued one warning, saying that after three warnings—or the first bolt of lightning—they were going to pull the plug and the event would not happen. Realizing it was beyond their control, with less than an hour until the event was to start, ReignDown USA's leaders and intercessors knelt behind the stage and cried out for God to divert the storm to the North and the South. They called upon the power of the Holy Spirit for the winds to shift from the West to the East and blow the storm away. As they cried out on their knees and begged God to move…He did! The wind shifted! The Park Service, watching the weather radar, said that somehow the storm cell was shifting its course and heading to the North.

God held the storm back for the entire four hours. The moment the last song was played (aptly called "Rain Down",) the first drops of rain began to fall, and a massive downpour doused the area.

Though the call was extended to the President of the United States, he was unable to attend. But God, in order to fulfill His vision, sent a man of authority from the Capitol—with a tender heart for the Lord—to stand in the President’s place. Congressman Trent Franks would come not only to read a proclamation that the President made at the request of ReignDown USA; he would fall to his knees as tears streamed down his cheeks, repenting, putting the final brush strokes on the picture of God’s vision. Not only did Congressman Franks do this, he participated the entire evening. He knelt down in his suit to pray with children and spoke with many.

 

 

[clueliss]

dadgumit @salex - you went and reminded me (speaking of KC and fundies) of Jerry Johnston - First Family Church (of grifters) in OP.  (Which went down in flames and foreclosure)

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/First_Family_Church

I used to have a bookmark for a giant thread at a board named something like KC Talk about this guy and his family and the church and all sorts of shenanigans.  I believe one rumor is that his son was bounced out of Liberty U.   FFC employed him, his wife, his kids, their spouses.  There was a mess of a school at one point.  He was a huge name dropper and rumor has it his father is the person who really wrote the sermons.  

s.