Jill, Derick and Israel- Lucky Number 13

[Hera]

Hmmm.  Speaking of, Zika has now been reported in Florida, though it is reported that all 3 cases were acquired while traveling outside the U.S. 

http://www.cnn.com/2016/02/24/health/zika-confirmed-in-pregnant-women-in-florida/.  

[season of life]

Hopefully nothing happens to Jill. I don't think the Dillards are using any form of birth control, though.

[picklepizzas]

I wonder if this is his way of dropping a hint that she's pregnant ...Zika isn't something to worry about unless you are pregnant, right?

[PracticeMakesProgress]

Right, please don't think I condone it. I was simply commenting the IDEA of corporal punishment (NOT with an object, mind you) is not inherently evil. That is why I compared it to guns. In reality, in the hands of people, who are typically emotional, it goes to pieces. Hence, it should largely be avoided. 

[Bad Wolf]

I really hope she's not pregnant and that she gives her body enough healing time after the c section. I know, she's a Duggar, so Jesus. I've given up on Derrick showing any common sense.

[OnceUponATime]

Is it just my eyes or does it look like Bin send Derick a hat for christmas?

[twinmama]

4 hours ago, HarryPotterFan said:

Are you sure he isn't a cat?  

Holy shit. I didn't expect this to actually be picked up, let alone be quoted!

Oof, I hate that places quote message board posts! So unprofessional. I mean, we are amazing people here obviously, but who cares what we think???

[violynn]

4 hours ago, twinmama said:

Oof, I hate that places quote message board posts! So unprofessional. I mean, we are amazing people here obviously, but who cares what we think???

You mean besides GOMI?  

[HarleyQuinn]

So Jill must be pregnant. Why else mention it? They're going to need to hammer it in that they're actively "fighting" it while they're on their pretend mission. 

[Tiny Bubbles]

Derick is looking unkempt, but that alone isn't really cause for concern, is it? I mean maybe he's just growing his hair so he can rock a man bun, ha.

But his ungroomed appearance combined with his odd and babyish post about OFF does make me think something's OFF ( see what I did there) with him.  

It's impossible to know what's going on just by looking at social media, of course, but the OFF post has convinced me that something is not right.  

[violynn]

10 minutes ago, HarleyQuinn said:

So Jill must be pregnant. Why else mention it? They're going to need to hammer it in that they're actively "fighting" it while they're on their pretend mission. 

Perhaps because they are getting lots of comments about the zika virus, and simply want to reassure their leghumpers they're being careful.  I hate it, but Jill probably is pregnant, but it doesn' t follow that is the only reason they would post about the virus.

[foreign fundie]

15 hours ago, PracticeMakesProgress said:

Right, please don't think I condone it. I was simply commenting the IDEA of corporal punishment (NOT with an object, mind you) is not inherently evil. That is why I compared it to guns. In reality, in the hands of people, who are typically emotional, it goes to pieces. Hence, it should largely be avoided. 

Although it is a subject I am still pondering, I too think that corporal punishment can sometimes be justfied (no, not beatings with objects or anything causing bodily harm, breaking a kid's will or demanding instant obedience or that kind of crap.) But we as parents are weak and in a moment of annoyance/desperation could do something unintended. And we don't always know why a kid acts out and it could be the wrong approach or age inappropriate. Therefore I think it is better to avoid corporal punishment just in case.

An example of when it might have been the right thing. I once knew a spoiled 6 year old who was used to adults catering to her every whim. When grandma came visit, she expected the same royal treatment. One day grandma went out to bring her inside but she wanted to play more. Grandma friendly but firmly told her to come. She kicked her grandma agains the bare shin. Grandma didn't think twice and returned the favour in the same way. The girl's mounth fell open from pure astonishment and from then on she understood she can't treat adults as dogs. She and grandma became great friends. It was very effective and not physically harming. It just shocked her into the realisation that she crossed a line. 

Now I wouldn't advocate it, much less write a book on how godly corporal punishment is. But in this and other instances I have seen I think it was harmless and possibly useful.

Still if banning any and all corporal punishment could project a child from abuse, that would be an easy choice.

[maple802]

15 hours ago, picklepizzas said:

I wonder if this is his way of dropping a hint that she's pregnant ...Zika isn't something to worry about unless you are pregnant, right?

Or trying to become pregnant. My doc advised against travel to areas with local transmission of the virus if we were planning on trying/being pregnant this year. So we're cancelling our original honeymoon plans. There are different views on this, but we felt there were too many unknowns about the virus to risk it.

We'll probably see some local cases in the US eventually, but it shouldn't be on the same scale.

[quiverofdoubt]

3 hours ago, foreign fundie said:

Although it is a subject I am still pondering, I too think that corporal punishment can sometimes be justfied (no, not beatings with objects or anything causing bodily harm, breaking a kid's will or demanding instant obedience or that kind of crap.) But we as parents are weak and in a moment of annoyance/desperation could do something unintended. And we don't always know why a kid acts out and it could be the wrong approach or age inappropriate. Therefore I think it is better to avoid corporal punishment just in case.

An example of when it might have been the right thing. I once knew a spoiled 6 year old who was used to adults catering to her every whim. When grandma came visit, she expected the same royal treatment. One day grandma went out to bring her inside but she wanted to play more. Grandma friendly but firmly told her to come. She kicked her grandma agains the bare shin. Grandma didn't think twice and returned the favour in the same way. The girl's mounth fell open from pure astonishment and from then on she understood she can't treat adults as dogs. She and grandma became great friends. It was very effective and not physically harming. It just shocked her into the realisation that she crossed a line. 

Now I wouldn't advocate it, much less write a book on how godly corporal punishment is. But in this and other instances I have seen I think it was harmless and possibly useful.

Still if banning any and all corporal punishment could project a child from abuse, that would be an easy choice.

The research shows again and again and again that there is no benefit to corporal punishment.  Refusing to hit or kick a child is not equal to no boundaries/limits at all. There is a big difference.  The research shows that kids who are spanked, even in a consistent and non "abusive" way, have lower cognitive abilities, less empathy, are more prone to violence, more likely to wind up in jail or prison, later language skills and earlier interest in sex.  Smacking a kid works in the moment but again, research shows that kids who are disciplined this way tend to lack self discipline and self regulation and are MORE likely to engage in the bad behavior in the future, not less.  

Setting firm limits and boundaries, without hitting, while encouraging a trusting and respectful relationship between child and adult, will help create a more attached, empathic, moral adult. 

I can give anecdotal evidence too, lots of it.  my father was hit, smacked, backhanded and spanked regularly as a kid, at home and at school.  He is immoral, childish, prone to hitting when angry- but only his children and wife.  He told me many times growing up "it's not illegal if you don't get caught" he has no problem breaking laws, mistreating people etc.  In some ways he's very much a 5 year old, or less, in emotional iq and maturity. He has no way to handle his negative emotions, and can barely acknowledge they exist, but acts out on them. He hides mistakes and blunders, if he breaks something in my house he hides it and is scared to tell me.  

I have an aquientance who uses spanking as her main (and really only) form of discipline for her 4 children.  The eldest is severely delayed in speech. They all get away with anything they can as soon as mom's back is turned (as long as we don't get caught there is no consequence, right?) and they all hit when angry or frustrated. 

But those are just case by case situations. The scientists who do controlled studies have found only negative results from physical discipline for children and no upside, other than it might make the care giver an outlet for frustration.

why would we think it's ok to hit children, the smallest most defenseless people on the planet, but it's not ok to hit an adult or even a dog?  

[Dandruff]

5 hours ago, HarleyQuinn said:

So Jill must be pregnant. Why else mention it? They're going to need to hammer it in that they're actively "fighting" it while they're on their pretend mission. 

They may be dropping a hint that she's pregnant in order to get viewers, though I wouldn't be surprised if she's pregnant.  Hope little Israel isn't getting doused in Deet.

[Cleopatra7]

21 hours ago, picklepizzas said:

I wonder if this is his way of dropping a hint that she's pregnant ...Zika isn't something to worry about unless you are pregnant, right?

The Duggars always drop hints about being pregnant, whether they are or not. It's like they think that pregnancy should be the default state of every married woman of childbearing age.

[EmCatlyn]

On February 25, 2016 at 8:43 AM, MissBitters said:

I was married in Tennessee and "obey" wasn't used.Then again, we were married by a judge. I haven't been to many weddings, but the word wasn't used at the few I've attended in the same area. I haven't gone to any fundie weddings, though, so that may be the reason why.

It depends on the denomination and the people getting married.  Except for the liturgical churches (RC, Lutheran, Episcopal, etc.) there is usually a lot of freedom in what people say in their vows.  But "obey" is not, as far as I can tell, required by any denomination, including mainstream Baptists.

The next four samples from the Internet do not include "obey."

Sample Roman Catholic Wedding

Sample Methodist Wedding

Sample Traditional Wedding Vows (acceptable to Baptists)

Sample Traditional Ceremony from GodWeb (also Baptist-Friendly)

However, this site following includes several samples of wedding vows, at least one of which (the second set) includes the woman promising to obey, while a few talk about headships and female submission to husband.

Sample Wedding Vows at Bible.org

In short, most of the time when women in Tennessee or elsewhere say " to obey" it is because they chose to include it in their wedding vows.

[PecanThief]

Okay something about Derick's instagram post is really pissing me off. It gives off this vibe like he is mocking everyone who is freaking out about the zika virus. Does he think because he's a fake grifter missionary that his future offspring are immune? Ugh it just pisses me off because the zika virus is a cruel reality for so many people living in those countries who can't just hop on a plane and escape back to Arkansas. God I want to punch his smug caveman face so bad.

[2manyKidzzz]

The zika virus is just heartbreaking. I hope Jill does not get it and I don't see how she can't be pregnant soon. It is just heartbreaking. 

[gilamomster]

as far as Izzy's "black eyes", they could be allergy eyes. My youngest still has them at 17years.

Talking at @ 9 mos? Nah, he laughs, probably babbles etc. My oldest didn't talk until he was almost 3 and then it was in full sentences. 

Milestones and mileage may vary.

 

[RoseWilder]

In my nannying days I saw anything from a child who said 60 words at age 1 to a child who didn't say one word (not even the babbling jibberish kind of thing that most kids do) until they were 2. Speech really varies from child to child. 

[PennySycamore]

We were talking about the age when kids start talking last night.  My grandson didn't start talking until he was 2.  My son-in-law's dad didn't start talking until he was 3 or 4.  He's a very active Toastmaster now.  Late talking is not a reason to panic.

[Imagine20]

Nevermind. Was looking on the wrong place! 

[lovemygsp]

3 hours ago, gilamomster said:

as far as Izzy's "black eyes", they could be allergy eyes. My youngest still has them at 17years.

Talking at @ 9 mos? Nah, he laughs, probably babbles etc. My oldest didn't talk until he was almost 3 and then it was in full sentences. 

Milestones and mileage may vary.

 

Per my pediatrician children don't develop seasonal allergies until they have been through a few seasons usually at least 2-3. (Aka 2-3yr old). So no their kid doesn't have allergies. No idea if/what but it's not that. 

[RoseWilder]

@lovemygsp: Allergy eyes can happen because of food allergies as well.