Hope Chests

[roddma]

We were talking about this on our writer's forum, and I wonder if Fundies do Hope Chests. They seem outdated to me. They come from a time when women were expected to marry.

[catlady]

i remember seeing magazine ads for them as late as the mid 80's, including Seventeen, but i never knew anybody who had one.  i agree that they're outdated and vaguely similar to a dowry or trousseau.  you're supposed to use them to collect linens and other textiles for your future homemaking career, because your best option in life is to snag a husband.   and if fundies tell their daughters that marriage is all they can do, i wouldn't be surprised if some groups still use them.

[CTRLZero]

Times have really changed.  I graduated from high school in the late 70s.  All the high school girls were taken on a field trip to be shown hope chests at a furniture store.  We were each given small keepsake versions of the hope chests courtesy of Lane furniture company!  Even then, we thought hope chests were old fashioned.  My daughter (now in her early 30s) boggles at the concept.  Memories...

[PennySycamore]

My sister may have had one, but I never did.  I was about to post the same thing about the small Lane versions as @CTRLZero. I still have my little hope chest.  It's on the shelf with my pets' urns.

[Loveday]

My mother graduated from high school in 1954. She went on one of those field trips and still has her little keepsake Lane box. I used to love looking in it at the things she'd saved: a corsage from a dance (it's still there!), tickets to a high school play, the tassel from her graduation cap. I always wanted one of the little boxes but it wasn't a thing in my area in the 70s, so I missed out. But  back in the '80s my husband got both me and my mom a real Lane cedar chest, just because we both had always wanted one (you can store a lot of stuff in those things!) and the furniture salesman gave him a keepsake box to give to me. I cherish that little chest.

[GenerationCedarchip]

I knew a lot of fundie girls in the early 2000s who had hope chests - me included. In our church circles, it wasn't so much a "homemaking is all you're ever going to do, so here, have a box" thing. It was more an emphasis on having a place to store special handmade items for your future home or a place to store family heirlooms.

My skills as a seamstress are beyond terrible (after years of training), so mine had a number of family heirlooms including a queen sized bedspread made by my grandmother and her sisters entirely of handmade lace. Oh, and a set of storebought sheets (gasp!  the scandal!) And since I cook, I had collected all my favorite recipes into a book.

My mom had one of those Lane boxes.  She still keeps letters and keepsakes in it.

[DaisyD]

I had a friend with a hope chest. I graduated in '99, and I'd never even heard of one. It was her mother's that had been passed down. I bought myself one to store linen in because the cedar keeps moths out.

[PennySycamore]

Cedar chests are a great place to store things you want to save as well as woolens.  When we went through my mom's cedar chest after she died, we found a flag with 48 stars. I'm not sure if we found her scrapbooks or not.

[Elvis Presby]

My mother told me about Hope Chests.  My parents both graduated at the very beginning of the 70s and I graduated in 1989.  I think most of the girls my age knew what they were, but no one had one.  It's not a bad idea to know how to make things, or get things on sale for use in the future; but doing those things and saving them until you get married (because that's when your life really begins) is an idea that does need to die.

My sister in law posted something on Facebook a few years ago about how finally after 20 whatever years of marriage she had finally gotten a quisinart.  I was pretty much done with her at that point!  You don't earn shit based on the number of years you have been married.  If you want a quisinart, then go get one.  :stepping off my soapbox now:

 

[nvmbr02]

I have one, as do both my sisters (we are in the 30-35 age group). We didn't grow up Fundie at all. We've always just stored special things it in. When my mom passed away we went through hers and found all sorts of special memories. Mine has a few items from my military days and a lots of mementos from my kids and other family members (newspaper clippings, hospital bracelets for when my babies were born, cards Dh gave me when we were dating, a rose from my wedding bouquet...those kinds of things.

It probably is very old fashioned but growing up all my female family members had one so it seemed quite normal. 

[FundieFarmer]

I have my grandmother's, and my own my mom made for me filled with my baby clothes for future Mini FFs. Both are full-sized Lane cedar trunks. It's less about any fundie thing for us than preservation of family heirlooms and also great storage pieces. A friend just restored her grandmother's and they are becoming trendier.

Plus I'm working toward an antique appraisal certification so I'm into that thing. So traditional trousseau, no. But yes, some people do still have and use them for things.

[Elvis Presby]

I do love a cedar chest, don't get me wrong!  I have one now, but only got it 4 years ago a few months after I turned 40.

[CTRLZero]

15 minutes ago, daisyd681 said:

I bought myself one to store linen in because the cedar keeps moths out.

We bought one last year to store blankets, etc.  We are guessing it was from the late 1950s-60s.  We were impressed by how well-built they were, and we loved opening it and smelling the cedar after all this time!

[Just_Jane]

My niece is 17 and she has one but I don't think it's intended for marriage. she wanted to start collecting things for when she moves out into her own place. so her's is filled with things like really cool plates and a nice set of cookware she bought at a store closing sale.

[Cats B4 Quivers]

My mom was friends with a woman who was training her two daughters to be proper wives and mothers so both girls had a hope chest. If I recall, the girls when I met them were 6 and 8 years old and both had already made or embroidered things for their chests. I really hoped my mom wouldn't make me fill one because I utterly hated sewing, knitting, and crocheting. Sure, I'm glad I know how but those aren't pleasant activities, just chores. The last time I saw them, the eldest girl was 13 and had pretty much filled her hope chest with things she made (including a massive bedspread she embroidered by hand) and was saving her money for quality pots and pans. On the one hand, I respected the work she put into her hope chest. The part that bothered me and my mom was the girls were taken out of school after grade 8 and made to work with their mom cleaning offices at night. Neither parent respected education and were busy arranging marriages their daughters with men from the Old Country. 

This was my only experience with hope chests. I didn't like it.

[HereticHick]

I've also wondered about hope chests as well--I've always heard about them & personally had one of the mini Lane cedar chests--but just kept jewelry in it. Never  knew anyone who was actually assembling a collection of stuff for marriage.  I am assuming that fundies don't do it much--or we'd see some reference to it on social media. For example, I am surprised that the Seven Farmgirl Sisters don't do it--it seems like them, since they actually know how to sew. I can see the Bontrager girls, since they comes from an Anabaptist background having hope chests, but I've never seen a reference to it.

[meda]

I have my grandmother's Lane cedar chest from the 1930's. I'm thinking of refinishing it this summer since the finish on the lid is pretty scratched. When my parents gave it to me, the intended message was "here, have some more storage", not  "start saving stuff for when you snag a husband" 

[nickelodeon]

A lot of people think about hope chests as a thing of the grandma past (there was a review of the book Faking Faith that balked at one of the fundie characters having a hope chest, saying that only Amish people still do that.) But some fundie types do have them! There's one story on Homeschoolers Anon that details the author's hope chest pretty thoroughly, for instance.

[busdrivingmom]

My ex fiance's 2/3 wife (he married her, divorced her, waited (and dated other people for two years, married her again and divorced her again) got a hope chest for her shower when they got married the first time (second they just went to the court house).  My ex thought it was the weirdest thing, but then again this woman was a disfellowshipped JW who wanted back in.  She used it to store a family quilt and some mementos.   (My ex fiance was Catholic and now converted to LDS for his fourth wife.)

[SassyPants]

I am late 50s and I had one- still have the actual chest.

My own daughter, 28, did not have one, but we did gift her pots, pans and other useful home goods along the way. One Christmas, when she was in college, she asked for a KA mixer- she's always been a baker, so it was a great gift. 

She is now married and has a fully stocked home, despite not having had any showers or a big wedding.

[Anonymousguest]

I graduated in'89, and I got that mini lane cedar chest from a local furniture store. 

I never had a hope chest, I have known a few girls in their 20s who had them. Every one needs stuff to stock their own home though, whether they are marrying or not, right?

[FundieFarmer]

Mine needs refinishing- a friend set a martini glass down on it without a coaster and left quite the ring. My grandmother would be appalled [emoji23]

[roddma]

The 'hope' was hope you caught a husband. I have a book"From Pigtails to Wedding Bells" with a chapter on hope chests. I will have to look at it.

[Kate11]

I'm in my twenties and one of my best friends has a hope chest. Her mother and grandmother were very into sewing and most of the things in her hope chest were made by them. My friend also really likes historical fiction so I think that had a lot do you with wanting the hope chest. 

[lynn0810]

I'm 29 and I always kind of wanted one. My mom had one that I believe my grandpa made for her. It is beautiful.