New Year, Same Old Maxwells

[Dru]

12 hours ago, PennySycamore said:

That birthday cake of John's is probably the saddest, worst excuse for a b-day cake I've ever seen.  I can't tell if it has any frosting and it's not big enough for the Maxwell to have more than a teaspoon of cake apiece.  Of course, we are talking about the Maxwells.  Aren't they famous for 2 animal crackers? 

I play Go Fish with my granddaughter a lot.  We use Finding Nemo cards.  What the Maxwell girls are playing is not Go Fish

Btw, a link to the Maxwells' blog is now on my Frequenty Visited Sites at the bottom of the page (along with all my bookmarks, FJ and Google)  I get when I open up a new tab.

I don't think it's actually a birthday cake. It looks more like cookie bars of some sort?

[PennySycamore]

1 hour ago, Dru said:

I don't think it's actually a birthday cake. It looks more like cookie bars of some sort?

With as many people they have who would be eating that "cake", they could have had a real cake (2 to 4 layers with frosting) cut into reasonable portions and have eaten the whole thing up.

[danvillebelle]

I have never owned an 8 X 8 pan (which is what it looks like that "cake" is baked in....for 21 people? excluding Calia).  What the hell is the point?  I can eat a pan of brownies that size BY MYSELF.  I had four kids.  When I baked desserts I usually did two 13 X 9 pans if I wanted them to last more than a day!

How they subsist on what they eat is beyond me. John is eating real food on the sly, I know it.

[SolomonFundy]

They've made non-traditional cakes for others in the family. I'd like to think that this is a genuine (albeit shockingly out of character) demonstration of their wish to cater to an individual's preferences. Let us not forget these recent jewels (plus Mary a couple of years ago):

 

[Coconut Flan]

Could they possibly do a special dessert for the birthday person and then another dessert for everyone to share?  I know that would be a radical thought for the Maxwells.

[Elegant Mess]

19 minutes ago, Coconut Flan said:

Could they possibly do a special dessert for the birthday person and then another dessert for everyone to share?  I know that would be a radical thought for the Maxwells.

I was wondering that, too.  My guess is that they probably have more than one dessert but such photos aren't generally posted to the blog.

[elliha]

I was actually more surprised at 5 small pizzas for that many people and that one was not eaten. I guess everyone must have had dinner before because I would easily eat a whole one myself and so would my husband and I assume my 3 year old would eat at least a decent slice. I hope that there really were "countless breadrolls" because otherwise, what the heck did they eat? 

[Eternalbluepearl]

I just noticed we usually see the sisters doing the work for these types of celebrations for their siblings and not really Steve and Teri. What do Steve and Teri do all day? 

[iweartanktops]

38 minutes ago, Eternalbluepearl said:

I just noticed we usually see the sisters doing the work for these types of celebrations for their siblings and not really Steve and Teri. What do Steve and Teri do all day? 

Hear from God and deliver the messages? 

[PennySycamore]

2 hours ago, SolomonFundy said:

They've made non-traditional cakes for others in the family. I'd like to think that this is a genuine (albeit shockingly out of character) demonstration of their wish to cater to an individual's preferences. Let us not forget these recent jewels (plus Mary a couple of years ago):

 

That girl is a very young looking 21!

[EmmieJ]

16 hours ago, anniebgood said:

My Pentecostal relatives were card fiends. They played spoons, gin rummy, Texas Hold 'Em and 5 Card stud for hours. For those of us non card playing heathens, books and other games ...checkers, chess, chutes and ladders and operation were available. 

My MIL and my Mom would play dominoes for hours, talk about things with dots on them. My Mom taught both my kids to count playing dominoes on her breakfast bar. 

I'd play canasta with my folks when I was in college. Don't remember how to now, but it was enjoyable on dateless Fridays. 

 

My Catholic grandmother played cards all the time.  After my grandfather died, she moved in with my family.  She taught us grandkids a lot of card games (Crazy 8's, Fan-Tan, canasta).  She also played a lot of solitaire to pass the time.  However, I'm sure fundies would see that as further proof that Catholics are not Christians and are in fact, quite evil.  Reading various posts on this forum reminds me to be thankful that I was not born into a fundie family - so many fun things are considered sinful by fundamentalists.  It's like they go out of their way to find darkness in most everything.

[danvillebelle]

2 hours ago, Eternalbluepearl said:

I just noticed we usually see the sisters doing the work for these types of celebrations for their siblings and not really Steve and Teri. What do Steve and Teri do all day? 

Well, we know how Steve spends at least a little of his time.....hi, Stevie!  

[Eternalbluepearl]

15 minutes ago, EmmieJ said:

 so many fun things are considered sinful by fundamentalists.  It's like they go out of their way to find darkness in most everything.

I know. Really sums it up. Why be one? Yikes. 

[picklepizzas]

5 hours ago, SolomonFundy said:

They've made non-traditional cakes for others in the family. I'd like to think that this is a genuine (albeit shockingly out of character) demonstration of their wish to cater to an individual's preferences. Let us not forget these recent jewels (plus Mary a couple of years ago):

 

bahaha. and here i thought sarah's 33rd bday cake was as stark as it could get. now i see that's just par for the course. 

[bean]

This Onion article cracked me up - it's exactly how I think I would feel if I had been born a poor Maxwell child:

http://www.theonion.com/article/bedtime-story-from-fucking-bible-again-36381

[SolomonFundy]

8 hours ago, PennySycamore said:

That girl is a very young looking 21!

 Tina is just about the most adorable kiddo I've seen in Fundyland. She's still little enough to think that maybe, just MAYBE, that ice cream is meant just for her. 

[PennySycamore]

6 minutes ago, SolomonFundy said:

 Tina is just about the most adorable kiddo I've seen in Fundyland. She's still little enough to think that maybe, just MAYBE, that ice cream is meant just for her. 

She does have that delighted look on her face, doesn't she?

[church_of_dog]

13 hours ago, jiggleromp said:

But, but...where is the cell phone holster attached during sexy times?  Is he still wearing a belt?

Hold on tight Anna, you are in for a bumpy ride.

I will show myself out.

Anyone want to speculate what the various Maxwells use as their ringtones?  

 

10 hours ago, elliha said:

I was actually more surprised at 5 small pizzas for that many people and that one was not eaten. I guess everyone must have had dinner before because I would easily eat a whole one myself and so would my husband and I assume my 3 year old would eat at least a decent slice. I hope that there really were "countless breadrolls" because otherwise, what the heck did they eat? 

Actually they say that they had one slice of pizza left, not one whole pizza left.  Although that still doesn't seem like enough for that many people, but Maxwells do seem to be into heavy-duty portion control.

[CyborgKin]

How much cheesecake is the right amount?

http://blog.titus2.com/2014/01/19/happy-birthday-sarah-4/#comment-205365

Quote

Hi Sarah–I was so surprised to see that yesterday was your birthday. I hope you had an absolutely lovely day!!!! You didn’t eat too much cake did you??? Love, Mrs. P.
>>>>>>>
Thank you. Actually, it was delicious cheesecake and just the right amount.

Also someone asked the flavour, and the answer was "It was vanilla. Some topped theirs with caramel and others with chocolate." so there seems to be some level of choice involved.

[Iokaste]

Could all the fundies please stop the ridiculous "...and I"!  
It's everywhere lately "Anna and I in pink", "An old one of Jer, Jed and I". It's "me" you idiots and it doesn't make you sound educated or refined, quite the contrary. 
Subject and object, it's really not that difficult to tell the difference: if you'd say "I" if there were no one else in the sentence, it's also "I" if there is, likewise with "me".  

Okay, rant over, me had to get it of I's chest....

[Anonymousguest]

2 hours ago, Iokaste said:

Could all the fundies please stop the ridiculous "...and I"!  
It's everywhere lately "Anna and I in pink", "An old one of Jer, Jed and I". It's "me" you idiots and it doesn't make you sound educated or refined, quite the contrary. 
Subject and object, it's really not that difficult to tell the difference: if you'd say "I" if there were no one else in the sentence, it's also "I" if there is, likewise with "me".  

Okay, rant over, me had to get it of I's chest....

I wish fundies were the only ones to do this! My face book feed would be a lot less annoying.

[kpmom]

54 minutes ago, Anonymousguest said:

I wish fundies were the only ones to do this! My face book feed would be a lot less annoying.

I get mixed up with this and probably say and write it incorrectly all the time.

Honestly, "Anna and I in pink" just sounds better to my ears for some reason, although I know lokaste is correct that it should be "me".

[blessalessi]

23 hours ago, elliha said:

I was actually more surprised at 5 small pizzas for that many people anmd that one was not eaten. I guess everyone must have had dinner before because I would easily eat a whole one myself and so would my husband and I assume my 3 year old would eat at least a decent slice. I hope that there really were "countless breadrolls" because otherwise, what the heck did they eat? 

I initially thought the 5 pizzas were for the "immediate family" of 7, which sounded ok, if there were breadsticks and salad.  But for ALL 22 OF THEM?!?!  

I bet the last slice was left untouched because they were all still ravenous, but no one wanted to deprive the others of the last bit!

 

26 minutes ago, kpmom said:

Honestly, "Anna and I in pink" just sounds better to my ears for some reason, although I know lokaste is correct that it should be "me".

I only learned this as an adult too.

I was taught by a linguist friend to remove the other person from the sentence to check if it still spunds correct. So "Anna and I in pink" may sound ok, but "I in pink" not so much.

I grew up a decade earlier than her, so I wasn't taught grammar but went on many nature walks in school time instead.  My grammar is stll shit, but I like to think my blood pressure is lower on the whole for the exercise.

[nausicaa]

On 1/19/2016 at 7:41 PM, iweartanktops6 said:

What? I believe you, but this sounds absurd! I... Wow. 

Yep, some mainstream Mormons actually won't play games with face cards, only Rook decks, and some won't use dice, even for something like Yahtzee. Like other posters said above, Old Maid and special Go Fish decks are generally seen as okay. The music group The Pointer Sisters were raised by a very conservative pastor father and said they couldn't play any games with dice. Their only board games were checkers, chess, and Candy Land. 

I know, my Catholic-raised self was seriously shocked upon learning this as well. 

According to my Mormon friend, they also try to avoid raffles and things like cake walks because it is so similar to gambling. 

[CyborgKin]

I wonder whether Magic: The Gathering cards can be held up to ward off fundies?

 

(warning: large images of slaughter elves and demon wizards)

Spoiler