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On 12/13/2015 at 8:22 PM, Buzzard said:

And so it begins...

Jessa - life over the past 4 months has been pretty crazy

Jill - everyone makes their own choices, but theyre not the only one that suffers the consequences (shot of derick hugging jill and izzy

Jinger - It was just seeing, all the pain (crying)

JD - I dont think thatany of us could have known that my brother was living such a secret life.

Anna holds Mer while Jessa sits on a couch. 

Anna - I'm ging to wake up and it will be OK.

Jessa - We never claimed to be perfect. You cant just say your prayers and everything is perfect.

Shots of all the J'kids crying

Jessa - Some tough days but each week it gets better

JIll - we will come out of this fire, stronger, as a family unit.

Shots of people taking pictures, baby shower, party to send off Jill and Derrick

Joy - Its scary that they're going there and its dangerous

Shot of Jessa in Labor, they play the 911 call and show her being taken out on a stretcher.  JIll is there on skype.

Still shots of Jill and Derrick

Jill - the last 4 months of my life have been different than what I had expected.  You expected at the beginning of the year what it will hold and it wasnt what we thoughtS

Still shots of Benessa

Jessa - life has been crazy.  We have endured a lot and its been difficult

Shot of Jill in the hospital after c section with izzy.  Jill says he is a good baby.

Benessa - We've been married for a year but its still the honeymoon phase.  They found out they were pregnant 4 months in.  It hit them "whoa, we're going to be parents."

Derrick - We're hanging out the night before my mouth surgery.  Jill looks at him funny when he says he may not be in pain.  He says that he doesnt want to widow her at 23.

Derrick - I got braces the day Izzy was born, then I needed to get my pallet expanded.  Broke his jaw and widened it. In the long run it will be good.

Jessa holds Izzy and they "talk." 

Jessa - I am 35 weeks right now and its a typical pregnancy.  Awesome second trimester, hearburn.. cant sleep... but its for a good cause.

Derrick (looks terrible) explains that they moved to do missionary work. 

JIll - one month was to get a feel

Derrick - then we go and do language immersion, then we go where we will be assigned.

Jessa - Ben and I had an ultrasound done and found out the gender. Havent told anyyone - its fun keeping a secret.  They want to surprise everyone.  She didnt have the patience to wait but he wasnt set so they compromised and they found out and it was a surprise for everyone else.

Ben - it will be fun

Derrick wears Izzy in a carrier and they waive bye bye

Derrick - Central america is a rough spot because of the violence and the drug cartels.  We arent naive but its our true calling.

Back at the brick house... they were planning on moving stuff out of the house, selling car etc.  JIll bounces Izzy and says "wanna go see papa?"

Derrick - the last 4 months of my life have been having just about every emotion you can have in that shortof time.

Jill brings the baby into the kitchen. Jill goes to get a nursing cover while Derrick eats breakfast.

Ben pulls eggs out of the fridge in his house. Its been a tough for months, but looking back I've learned a lot to help out marriage get stronger.  Its been tough.  

Ben cracks eggs, Jessa does her hair.  

Producer - as the last few months tempered the joy of being pregnant?

Jessa - of course not.  She curls her hair.


"Several moths ago, a police report was released containing allegations that, as a minor, Josh inappropriately touched five people."

Jessa - here I am, most joyful time... and people go digging up old bones. It was really frustrating.

Jill - Years ago when that, the situation took place, its not that like, something that should be hidden.  We had to go through lots of different steps including counseling and after that time it was a really hard time in our family.

Ben makes eggs

Jessa - at that point it was shocking, you dont ecpect something like that to happen... its your brother. There was a period of time when josh was not to be trusted.  He spent time away fom home getting counseling.  That was 12 years ago

Jill - The healing process started shortly after that happened and when something ahppens you go on with your life.  We've chosen to forgive Josh and thats an important part of our healing.

Jessa - During that time it was definitely a journey.  My parents would talk about, you dont instantly rebuild trust.  Its a journey to rebuild that trust and it was definitely over the next years, josh being abe to prove that he was worthy of being trusted.  It was restored with my family and my parents

derrick - I'm trying to gain weight for the mission field (eats a waffle, feeds Jill...

Jill - the police report was released to the world and I know that wasnt right.  Whoever released that, it shouldnt have happened because we basically had moved on from there and for this to be released roght after israle was born, all these happy occcasions in my life were thrown under the bus.  (fake crying) We had to work through it. Because as a victim you've already moved on and it want fair for everyone to see.

Derrick reads a bible quote... 

Derrick - even people who dotn read the bible know, pride comes before the fall. 

JIll - After the police records were released a judge ruled that it shouldnt have happened so the records were destroyed but it still hurts.

Jessa - I guess I was surprised by the, all the news outlets pickingit up. Probably understandably so because of the christian values my family has.  People were like "oh my goodness."  Ya'all arent perfect? We never said we were perfect. Maybe theres kind of an expectation that, well, this family doesnt have problems, but we've walked difficult roads.

Benessa sits and reads the bible

Jessa - at the time its really hard to see what good can come from it, but we know thtat god tells us that he works for good. Even if it seems impossible, god can do that.

Jill - we learned from that situation. We arent responsible for someone else's life choices.  It leaves a scar but you move on and you have boundaries and you move on and go on wth life but that was really hard.

Jill and Derrick take Izzy upstairs

Benessa goes outside...


On 12/13/2015 at 8:37 PM, Buzzard said:

Jill and Jessa - spewing shit - part 2

Derrick - they're putting together a presentation of what their ministry looks like.

Jill - we have some time and we'll have an event and put together a slifeshow and talk about our ministry

Benessa puts a sheet on the crib.

Jessa - Jill had extra bed sets so this is the most gender neutral.  Things were getting back to normal... and then another big news break that shocked and suprised us all because over the years Josh worked to repair out trust in him.  He really became someone we could look up to.


"two monts after the police report surfaced, another story about Josh was released in the media."

"Josh's name and identity were linked to an account on a website that connects individuals looking to have extramarital affairs."

Jessa - Josh eneded up confessing that he had gotten addicted to pornography and he had been unfaithful to his wife. We were devastated.  it seemed like it was a bad dream. How could this happen?

Jill - Just, thinking about like, um, what josh has been speaking for and just how our family believes as a whole, it was unbelievable, it couldnt be true.

Jessa- As we, as a family, looked into the situation, you have to wonder how does this happen.  How do you get from this point to that point? How do you go from being in this wonderful marriage relationship to living in a sort of double life and being unfaithful to your spouse.

Benessa puts together the crib

Jill - everyone makes their own decisions and everyone makes their own choices but they're not the only ones who suffer the consequences. Everyone around them does.

Jill looks online...

Producer - you defended josh, were you like "how could you do this?"

Jill - (fake crying) I did thin about derrick and I talked about how earlier this year when Jessa and I were talking with Megyn Kelly we wanted to say the truth.  I feel that we did that and I feel that, looking back, I still would have said that. BUT, knowing now what josh was hiding um, I feel like, you know, it wasnt right for him to let us speak our words without having the full knowledge of what he was hiding. 

Jessa - It was one thing months before when we looked back on the situation that happened when he was a teenager and said this was so long ago, but this is an issue happeneidng right now.  The other situation we had already brought closure, it was in the past, but yeah, it was really difficult to come to grips with that.

Benessa - puts the crib together some more... There appear to be flags with pictures of benessa hanging in the baby's room.

Jill - Now I think that we just have to understand that nobody is strong enough, thats why its so important to set boundaries and be accountable and just really focus on your relationship with the lord and not being a hypocrite. Yo u have to be real, open, and so, its really caused us to re evaluate things in our own lives too.

Derrick - Whats done in secret was done when no one is around is who we really are. If we meditatie on that we know who we really are.

They joke that they have a picture of everyone in central america holding israel

Jill - I think our faith has been strengthened.  By um, you know when the boat rocks you dont jump out, you cling tighter to it.  During this time its not easy, you dont say you prayers and everything works out.  That doesnt make things all beautiful and happy and cheery.  Its a daily struggle, daily battle.  

Benessa - still putting together the crib... they're somber.

Jessa - we pulled together and cried together but as each week goes by theres healing in this and wer're getting through

Jill - going forward, we will come out of this fire stronger as a family unit because life is full of challenges and struggles. Its one of them in the rest of our lives arent going to be easy and I'm greatful I'm a part of a family and we all love eachother and we want whats best for eachother even if its tough sometimes.


On 12/13/2015 at 8:48 PM, Buzzard said:
  Reveal hidden contents


Verbal Diarrhea Part 3 (I have no idea why there is a spoiler tag)

Cars drive

Jinger is coming to take Jessa shopping for a glider.

Jessa and Jinger TH - we used to spend a lot of time together but now its just once a week.  When we get together its just like old times.

They're looking for a glider/rocker... then they'll browse

Jinger - we were always super close.  I cant believe she's pregnant. Its not the same girl I know.  Jinger checks that its jut one baby.

Jessa shows her the ultrasound on her iphone.  They discuss the detail in the ultrasound. Jinger cant wait to see what he looks like - duggar or seewald.

They head into the store...

Benessa - Its starting to hit us that we're about to be a family of 3.  We're starting to prepare for this.  Getting out the door is hard, got to pack all kinds of stuff.

Jinger and Jessa shop for baby clothes.  I'm guessing this is staged because we saw them on istagram posting at walmart... they are definitely not at walmart.

Jinger - the last 4 months in our family, I think that, when we first heard that these reports were about to be released we were like "why is this being released?" We worked through all of it and the forgiveness... the other kids that... with younger kids there its stuff I guess, it was just seeing all the pain (shes really crying) come back up so it was probably one of the toughest times in our life by far.

Back to shopping.. apparently Jinger bought her a swing.  They have 2 rockers. They sit in them.

Jinger  - a few weeks afer our faces werent on the magazines anymore we could go to the grocery store and it was more like a normal life. Then we got word that something new had came out, um, I think that when we heard all this stuff it was so unreal, we still have trouble comprehending it, but the reality of this person we thought we knew, this person we love greatly is still loved but just the hard pain that its caused (crying)...

Back to shopping... they discuss the two chairs and which is more cozy.

Jinger - when mom told us wer were so overwhelmed and so grieved, this person we knew istnt the same person so we just stopped and prayed. Asked god to help us get though it, its hard to knowwhat the do, continuing on in life is ard.

Back to the chairs... they discuss throw pillows

Jessa takes picturesof the chair

Jinger - on a daily basis we haveto work through that and knowing our future from here ot looks different.  We have to comprehend what that means.

Back to shopping, they're buying the white one.



On 12/13/2015 at 9:00 PM, Buzzard said:

Part 4

Jill and Derrick show up at Benessa's house.  Jill has a new doppler and uses it on Jessa.  Jessa feels big, and lays on the couch. They cover here with a blanket.

Jessa - growing up, jill liked to pretend she was a nurse. She'd listen to heart beats and give them drops of juice.  She always had that in her (too bad she couldnt be a nurse).

Jill feels where the baby is in Jessa belly.  Jill uses the doppler and they smile when they hear the heartbeat.

Izzy cries.  Derrick asks if Ben has any questions.  Izzy doesnt answer...

Ben - Jessa is going to be an awesome mom - caring and no nonsense.

Jessa - we compliment eachother on our parenting styles.  I'll keep them in line and he'll goof off with them.

Jill and Jessa make hot chocolate.

Jill - is it weird that your married and having a kid?

Jessa - yeah.  Its hard to imagine what life will be like with the baby.

Jessa - I'm at the point that I'm excited about seeing the baby but I'm not rushing it.  Its allright, I can be pregnant for another month and be ok.

They say the chocolate milk smells like a cow

Jessa - I'm not nauseated but I have a heightened sense of smell.

Jlll - i could smell really well froma mile away

Derrick - Its cool being a dad. Wanting to change a diaper, I had never done that.  For me, the learning curve has been vertical.  Its different when its you child.  In the beginning you have to remind yourself that you have a kid.  We'd get out and Jill would be like "are you going to get israel?" Sometimes when you've only had him for a couple of weeks you have to remember.

Derrick Bench presses izzy.  Ben thinks thats a good idea but not after feeding.  But not with a low ceiling.  Its mutually beneficial because you get your excercise in.  Ben tries bench pressing him, derrick tells him to have a good grip.  The girls look on and smile.

Ben - it was good to have an actual baby there to get some live experience.  its one thing to have someone tell you, its another to demonstrate.

Jill - are you prepared for the birth?

Jessa - I try not to think about it.  I'll probably cry.  I ask ben to give me a back massage but thats not helpful.

Jill - when it comes down to it, for me, every contraction, it wasnt super bad if I focused on that contraction.  Dont get focused on the big picture.

Jessa  - Its hard to think about how long labor can go. I cant imagine having some wihout a break.

Jill - you doget a break, long enough to catch your breath. 

Jessa - Ben said that he didnt think he couldbe in there.  I dont want to see you in pain, cant help you.

Ben - I hadnt thought about it

Jessa - it will be intense seeing me in agony but we went to these brith classes.  

Ben - its better for me to be there because it is helpful.

Jessa - Its good to have moral support.

The girls go back to where the menfolk are with izzy.  They talk about its different... JIll says "quincy adams."  Izzy pats Jessa's belly



On 12/13/2015 at 9:14 PM, Buzzard said:

Part 5

Ducks swim in a lake

Jana, Joy, Jill, and Jinger go to pick out clothes for orphans in central america.  Joy holds Izzy and says he's giant.  Jill explains they want white shirts, navy slacks... etc. 

Jana - this trip is mixed, jill wanted help, but we get to spend time together.

Joy doesnt like shopping.  Jinger looks at shirts that are clearly too big for babies.

Joy - its weird having her in central america.  We've always been together.  

JIll says they found clothes for the orpahns, but also stuff for jessa and ben.

Jana - the last 4 months have been really difficult. Things thrown into our path, whats that about? Shocking news... just a lot of stuff to work through. 

Joy - our lives have been very different.  A lot has going on, its been the hardest that we've gone though but we're getting through it. 

Back to shopping...

Jana - when we fiund out there was going to be a police report released we found it was a lot bigger than we thought it was going to be.  And I'm just [eople's reactions to it all... it affects us knowing this is out there and people know about the different situations.  Its been interesting to see how other have said "ive been thought this too." Its encouraging to hear that we're not the only ones.

Back to shopping... they get a football hat.  If its a girl they can get a red bow to put on it.

Joy - Just as the first wave was setting down and things were getting back to normal we got the news that there was something else coming out.

Jana - Jinger, my mom, and I were gone at a conference sharing when the news broke.  My mom was the first to hear about it, my dad called her. She sat us down in the room and (tearless crying) and um, just that, um, our brother had been living a double life and he wasnt who he appeared to be and, just that there was this, reports and news that had comeout about his lifestyle and how he was living. It was things we had no clue about.  We thought it cant be true, it has to be wrong.

Back to shopping

Izzy rides a horse

Joy - when the first thing happened it was a long time ago and over the years we had forgiven him and moved on with life and he was my role model and i looked up to him and it was hard to see that he was making bad choices again. And then nobody knoew about it.

Jana - and then to hear from my mom that my dad sat Josh down and talked with him and its true.  At that moment it was like, I dont know, just a lot of things going through.  WHo do you trust? Can you look out and see these people, re they who they appear to be or are they just, have these masks on or something that they really arent.

Back to shopping... they can always save it for the next one...

Jana - as hard as it is and as awful as it has been, it has been one of those things that god brings beauty out of ashes and made us think through a lot of things in our own lives.  You have your moments when its a good day and then others your'e discouraged and your down but we're all going through this grieving process, like you go through that place of grief of mourning and crying but then not staying there 

Joy - I think even though its beena while since it came out its hard to believe because hes my brother and I love him and I forgive him forit, but its tough and its hard to move on with life.

Back to shopping... they pay and leave.  No idea who's holding Izzy.


On 12/13/2015 at 9:22 PM, Buzzard said:

Part 6

Joy, Jana, JInger, and benessa are at the house with Izzy, and JIll.  No sign of derrick.

Izzy goes to ben (from jana)

Ben - when the girls got there I took the baaby.  that didnt make me nervous.

Jessa - Newborns are fragile feeling

They go into the nursery and look at ultrasound pics trying to see the sex.  They are taped so you cant see what the sex is.  

Producer (to jana and jinger) is this the first time you girls have kept a secret from one another?

Jana - probably not

JInger - I dont know

Joy - no, (to jill) you didnt tell me you were talking to derrick until a month after

JIll - laughs.. whoops

Back in the room they fight over looking at the pictures.

Jessa - its fun havinga secret.  Its also stressful.  We've heard eachother slip up.  She starts to tell something and he stops her.

The girls go through the baby clothes and coo.  There is a laundry maching prety much IN the nursery.

JInger - we tried to be creative with the gener neutral stuff, we could always throw a bow on it.

Ben likes the baby football.

They talk about who was the biggest baby

Ben thinks the baby is 7 pounds.  They kiss

Jessa thinks it was sweet to get the baby items together.  Jill gave her a stack of onesies. Ben is grossed out by things getting pooped on.



On 12/13/2015 at 9:43 PM, Buzzard said:

Part 7

(preview of next week - lots of Anna)

They decorate a house I dont know for Derick and Jill's going away (take 7) party

Its a thank you party, a time of fellowship and time to talk about their ministry work, to thank people face to face.

Sierra shows up.  She gives jill a shirt that says "world traveler" for Izzy

JIll  - its great to see the famly before we head out.  Izzy is passed around.

Jedidiah - its really neat after all thats been going on to come back together and have an awesome time to see friends and just get back together again.

JD - the past 4 months have been a difficult time, a lot of surprises, and somber a little bit.

Joseph - so, the day before everything broke loose on the police report and all that from josh's past I was about to head out on a mission trip and my dad called mein the room and told me. This is going to come out and will be a big deal, our family has put ourselves out there (shot of michelle decorating with full on krazy eyes) on the line and anything comes up they will question you on it.

Joy - lets out stuff on baloons.

Cierra organizes chocolate covered strawberries.

Josiah - I was not sure how it would influence our daily lives, would people just be staring at us and not want to talk to us.  It was that way with some people. but a majority just let us know they were praying for us.

Derrick starts the powerpoint.

Izzy is passed around more

JD - after everything started to settle down from the news about josh we got news of a second thing that was, that we had no clue about, that was more of a shock than the first stuff coming out because you look at your brother and your like, um, you want to think the best about him.

Joe? - Even after the first thing that came out when he was younger I never had close of a relationship as I did.  Over time it builds back up but when this next situation came up it blew my mind, I had no idea.  I dont think there is anyway that any of us could have know that my brother was living such a secret life, just, whenever sometone you respect the most is willing to get up and proclaim what we believve as christians about being true to your wife, (shot of michelle fluffing Jill's hair), you never would expect that person to be the one thats involved in it and it broke my heart. 

Back to the party...

JD - For me, making sure that I am the man I need to be, and I'm the example to those all around me. Its a big load, its a big weight upon me because you know, I have a lot of younger siblings looking up to me. I have to be an example to them because whatever I am thats what they want to be, thats the way that it was with me and josh. I wanted to belike him. One of the toughest things I had to tell my older brother was that I didnt want to be like you anymore.

Back to the party...

Derrick - we're really glad you are all here... Jill is wearing a similar shirt to Michelle's blue shirt.

Derrick - I know some people were cncerned about bringing a newborn to central america but I'm willing to do that and make that sacrifice, and protect my family, to go to those places because of whats a stake.  

Dan starts the show.

Joy - its scary that they're going there ,  its dangerous. They know the danger but they're willing to go.  Its really neat to see their boldness.

They show shots of israel traveling in july

Jessa - its not a safe place to be.  Taking israle with them, its not just the two of them.  They have a child they have been entrusted with.

Derrick - we're building relatiomships and trying to be a life and hope...

JIll - I'm not going to say its cool.  There are times you cry and talk through things but I know this is what I'm supposed to do.

Boob prays off camera... you can hear his voice, though.

Michelle kisses Jill

Joy - I think there is hope for our family.  We wont get back to that normal but there will be a new normal and there are exciting things coming up.

Jinger - Its amazing how Just everyone has come closer to eachother through this and I'm just so greatful

Josiah  - I dont think things can ever get back to the normal because of this situation.  But, I think we will have to stay together as a family and try to come out the other side of this

JIll - we feel like we are stepping on and lookin gforward to things that are ahead and yeah, there are exciting things and more challenges.  Once step at a time

Jessa - Definitely with all the difficult things my family has walked though theres still a lot of exciting miestones ahead and ben and I are excited to welcome our little one into the world.  Lots of exciting things going on.  SOmetimes there are moments when youneed to focus on those things going on gotta weep with those who weep but also wonderful times of rejoycing with those who are rejoycing

Producer - Hello anna

Anna - great to see you again, we've missed you.  She is wearing her wedding ring... they make a shot of it... then cut to next week.

Baby shower for Jessa... Jill says goodbye... Anna is back in the house, the "starter home."  

Anna is asked what her plans are regarding her marriage.

Jessa is in labor... 911 call... Michelle describes the blood. Jana was there.



What a HORRIBLY boring episode!

Discuss the shit-spewing here: http://www.freejinger.org/topic/25017-jill-and-jessa-duggar-special-sunday-dec-13-merge/?page=1

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