Josh and Anna Renew Vows

[DuggarsTheEndIsNear]

I think a vow renewal would be the ultimate humiliation for Anna, especially if there's another scandal.  What would she have to gain?

acceptance amongst her cult. After all, they believe his transgressions are her fault. 

[EmCatlyn]

I'm not sure.  I hope he was, I really would love to know what went through his head to cheat on his wife. & thinks it was ok. 

Ah, but how do we know that he thought it was okay?  He probably believed he could get away with it, but I bet he was afraid not only that he would get caught but that God would zap him if he didn't stop and repent.

Lots of us do (or fail to do) things we know we should without thinking it was "okay."  Josh knew he was doing wrong.  His referring to himself as the world's biggest hypocrite in his confession makes me think that he was conscious of how wrong his actions were in the light of the beliefs he professed.

To be sure, he will want to be forgiven when he returns, but that will be because he will believe that he has atoned enough.

[EmCatlyn]

I don't know why any of you believe that article is real. It's all totally made up. Anna would never consider such a thing after all she's been thru. It's BS.

I think the article is probably made up, but I could see Anna going along with it if Josh asked her to do it.  He is her headship.  If she is still with the Duggars she will continue going along with the circus.

[TheSilverTongue]

I really don't think it's implausible. Michelle and Jim Bob renewed their vows for the sole purpose of appearing on that wedding dress TV show. I think it's way more likely than them getting a divorce like other tabloids are saying.

[EmCatlyn]

I think a vow renewal would be the ultimate humiliation for Anna, especially if there's another scandal.  What would she have to gain?

This isn't about what she might gain. If she did it, it would be because it was asked/expected of her.   I don't think she would find it humiliating though.  She might even feel vindicated by his show of turning over a new leaf.

[HarryPotterFan]

Better yet, Rolling in the Deep. You're gonna wish you never had met me...

All I want for Hanukkah is a music video of Anna doing her own version of "Before He Cheats." Maybe TLC or Duggar Studios can help. 

[DuggarsTheEndIsNear]

Ah, but how do we know that he thought it was okay?  He probably believed he could get away with it, but I bet he was afraid not only that he would get caught but that God would zap him if he didn't stop and repent.

Lots of us do (or fail to do) things we know we should without thinking it was "okay."  Josh knew he was doing wrong.  His referring to himself as the world's biggest hypocrite in his confession makes me think that he was conscious of how wrong his actions were in the light of the beliefs he professed.

To be sure, he will want to be forgiven when he returns, but that will be because he will believe that he has atoned enough.

I agree with this, especially if (I am saying if, in not diagnosing or anything) his actions are driven by an addiction or some other mental/emotional issue. 

That said, I think we need to remember how stunted the Duggars are. Cheating is something a LOT of people do to varying degrees in their early years of relationships while their learning to navigate desires, commitments, etc. The difference is that most people go through that while they're in middle school to college, and unmarried. Josh was engaged to a girl he barely knew after 3 months of long distance courtships. He NEVER learned the valuable life lessons most people do before marriage that prepare you for marriage because he was never given the chance.

I am, by no means, saying he's right or his actions are excusable. But, Josh is emotionally and mentally stunted thanks to his upbringing, as is Anna, and is everyone else brought up in that courting only life.

Not to mention, Josh was married off quickly to solve the sex abuse issue. His marriage was all but arranged (or maybe even completely arranged). At best, Josh and Anna married while in lust with each other. At worst, his marriage was purely believed to be the way to save his soul. If it's the latter, and his "inappropriate" (that word is in quotes because it can cover anything from Gothard in appropriate to actually inappropriate) sexual desires didn't go away or got worse, I could see him ending up in a downward spiral which dumped him off in a real moment of self loathing fueled adultery. 

Finally, his all but arranged marriage is just part of a life it's clear he didn't want. Josh wanted so much from his life. He wanted to be a lawyer. He got an education that didn't even prepare him to be a car salesman. He wanted to be a politician. The only thing he could get close to that job was being a famous supporter of an organization that gave him a fake title so they could pretend he was useful. I doubt he really wanted to be married with 4 children by this point in his life, but he didn't really have that choice. Cheating was something he had control over. And while he may have hated himself every minute for what he was doing, that wouldn't be enough to override his feeling of freedom. 

Again, I'm not saying Josh is excused for his actions. There are actual, adult ways he could have handled this situation. BUT, his actions don't necessarily have to be ones he was ever proud of. 

[Furbabies]

How about they just go on Marriage Boot camp, Reality Stars?  I'd watch it.

[amster]

On 3 December 2015 at 2:11 PM, Rachel333 said:

Years ago I was invited to a vow renewal at the Duggars' house after the husband had committed a fairly major trust violation. The couple is still together so I guess it worked in their case.

I doubt this is any more than a rumor but I do think a vow renewal is probably coming for Josh and Anna since we know they're unlikely to divorce. I kind of doubt it's something they'll publicize, though.

 

Want to dish any further details?

[PickledPepper]

7 hours ago, amster said:

 

Want to dish any further details?

I was wondering this as well...

[Toothfairy]

Maybe some therapy. Real therapy instead. Maybe leaving their cult. Or maybe divorcing. All better options. 

[isarhenne]

On 3.12.2015 at 4:11 AM, Rachel333 said:

Years ago I was invited to a vow renewal at the Duggars' house after the husband had committed a fairly major trust violation. The couple is still together so I guess it worked in their case.

I doubt this is any more than a rumor but I do think a vow renewal is probably coming for Josh and Anna since we know they're unlikely to divorce. I kind of doubt it's something they'll publicize, though.

wow, can this cult be any better for men who are acutally psychopaths? I mean, you can cheat on your wife, molest little girls, never go to jail for it, and  still be completely accepted in their community because you can "heal" and you're the holy first born son anyway. But if a woman can not forgive that she is shunned immediately? these women must live in constant cognital dissonance and not even realise their own feelings or self. they truely are mere extentions of their fathers/husbands.

[Jana814]

5 hours ago, Toothfairy said:

Maybe some therapy. Real therapy instead. Maybe leaving their cult. Or maybe divorcing. All better options. 

I don't think any of this is going to happen.  I wish something like this would happen but I doubt it.