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Real Life Fundie Encounters - Part 3


happy atheist

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Just discovered that my most fundy friend from high school-- 6 kids, skirt wearing, homeschooling--has divorced husband #2 and moved on to husband #3.  : )

[she and husband #1 divorced because she wanted to be more conservative than he did, & he didn't want to have child #3. Haven't heard the story yet of what happened to husband #2]

 

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Oh, boy, did I ever have a fundie encounter.  I spent a few years living next to a family with 13 kids.  Kids were mostly sweet but the parents...not so much.  Most of the kids -- "homeschooled" of course -- can't read.  Mom tries to draw attention to herself, hoping for her own reality show -- apparently she thinks procreating is a talent.  She paints a completely false version of their lives -- it's all unicorns and rainbows, while the reality is naked babies outside in winter and chewed up diapers strewn about the junky yard.  Poor older girls get the child care and household duties.  An 11 year old girl told me, "I'm glad I got my hair cut!"  I asked why and she said "So it won't fall in when I'm cleaning the toilets".  Ack.

Rental house was utterly filthy and trashed.  They skipped on the last month's rent, you know, like Jesus would do.

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I had never thought of people as "fundie" before I started reading FJ. Where I live we have many Hutterite colonies and Mennonite communities. I grew up knowing they lived a different lifestyle than me but they are approachable and contributing members of our area. I realize now that one of my good friends in high school came from a fundie background as well as a man I used to work with. I used to think of them as being like Mennonites and yet they were not so I couldn't pinpoint what they might be. The women wear dresses or skirts. The young, unmarried girls wear their long hair down and the older and married women wear their long hair pinned up like in the early 1900's. The don't have a church but meet in a families home each Wednesday and Sunday. They don't celebrate Christmas but do gather together for a family meal on the day. They go to public school. They don't own TV's but allow their children to watch educational programs at school and aren't offended if a movie is played. The women will work outside the home if they want to. My friend's mom earned an arts degree when her kid's reached high school age. The men wear buttoned up western style shirts and jeans just as the Mennonite men do in our area. The boys would wear shorts in the summer and have hobbies such as skateboarding and skiing. My friend would answer questions very simply and didn't seem open to discussing their beliefs. She kept it to herself and we accepted her for who she was. She did tell me that divorce wasn't acceptable for them and that if it did happen it wouldn't be acceptable for the divorced couple to remarry. The family sizes range from 3 to 6 children.

I used to work in a farm supply store and Hutterites and Mennonites were a huge part of our customer base. I was the merchandiser and sometimes I would come into work and find random items such as gloves and tools that had tags on them from another store. My manager would barter and trade with the Hutterites for minor things because they are such good customers. They have a lot of money and own a lot of land and buy a lot of supplies and machinery. From time to time they would bring in their homemade 'wine' as a gift of appreciation. I took a taste of it once. I'm sure it was moonshine in a wine bottle!

My ex-husband's grandfather was extremely religious and of the Mennonite faith. He was abusive and strange. The family still suffers the effects of it. I learned that there was such a thing as spiritual abuse in my research of fundamental religion and now know I have witnessed it. My ex mother-in-law is now an atheist and has become quite strange herself in her old age (not because she's atheist, just to clarify myself). Two of her brothers had committed suicide, another one took off one day and returned a decade later expecting life to resume the way it had when he left it. The last one is in financial and legal trouble and is causing chaos and disruption with a local builder's board.

 

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In my long post above I forgot to add our craziest local fundamentalist. His name was Wiebo Ludwig. He's dead now but his clan is still in the area. His group of so called Christians has a grudge against the oil and gas industry. The grudge isn't the problem. The problem was the way he and his cult chose to deal with it. They decided to blow up local gas well sites because he claimed they were causing his 40 plus year old wife by the name of "Mamie" to suffer several miscarriages. He had a grudge against the oil and gas industry and yet he chose to move right into the middle of it all and enabled it by driving large, fuel guzzling cargo vans. To this day his spawn like to drive big, gas guzzling SUV's such as Expeditions. And never mind that blowing up gas well sites isn't exactly good for the environment either. Obviously they didn't care a whole lot if an employee happened to be out there checking the well sites and got blown to the moon, just as long as Mamie could have another child to add to the herd. I name this as my first experience with terrorism because it was definitely frightening to know that there was a crazy out there deliberately doing these things. He was convicted for it and spent some time in jail. There is also the controversy of a local girl being shot and killed on his property. An arrest has never been made.

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There was a fundie/hate monger (redundant, I know) who went to my university, he would stand out by the food court and try to stir people up, provoke people, spread hate and such, like Jesus wanted. He often had to have campus police there to protect him from the women on campus because he would tell them things like "you deserve to be raped". I was bored one day in between classes and decided to go see what he was yammering on about and that day it was something about how women needed to submit to him. Now I have what you might call an athletic build and stand just around 6' with shoes on so I figured I might get a little closer to this tiny man and ask him why exactly he felt I should submit to him. He informed me it was because he was a man. Ok, in the biological sense, I'll accept that you're male. Then I asked him if he thought his girlfriend who was standing by him should submit, and of course he said yes. Because you're a man? Yes. Well, do you have a job? This is my job. Do you get paid to do this? On the 15th will you take home a paycheck that you can use for rent and food? No, it's not like that. Ok, so no paycheck. Now I have a question for you, you say this lovely young woman here should submit to you because you are a man and a leader, but what I see is a little boy who can't care for her monetarily, you can't provide shelter or food, because you have no paycheck, by your own admission. you can't provide emotional wellbeing because you're emotionally stunted and say disgusting things to women, asking random strangers about their sex lives as the walk to lunch. You can't provide her with physical protection, since you have to have security to protect you from these teenage girls you've pissed off (at this point I'm enjoying invading his space just enough to make him step backward a time or two). So, you, the man and provider, can't provide food, shelter, emotional support or physical protection to this woman or, heck, even yourself. Tell me again why anyone should submit to you? Because your biologically male? You might be but you're a piss poor example of a man. 

Then he decided it was time for a lunch break and wouldn't talk to us any more. Sad day. I did hear his girlfriend broke up with him within the month though, so hopefully some of that made it into her head.

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Does a few hundred creationists count?

Probably not, since skirt-wearing is only at about 1%. About what you'd expect anywhere.  Even saw some 'so short they are barely visible' shorts.

OTOH there are lots of homeschoolers, and some anti-abortion sponsors, and even some folks involved in the Christian Democratic Party.

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16 hours ago, Muskrat said:

In my long post above I forgot to add our craziest local fundamentalist. His name was Wiebo Ludwig. He's dead now but his clan is still in the area. 

Was there a film made about him?  One of those Brian Dennehy true crime drama shows? I think I saw it on tv. Sounds like you live in an interesting area fundy-wise!

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You guys... my bff is a wine salesperson and she's doing market work in San Antonio right now. She sent me a text with a link to a story about Doug Phillips asking if I know who he is. Of course I say yes and she says "oh because the local rep I'm working with today was one of his interns!!!!"  She was walking into a meeting so I didn't get a chance to ask her his name but I'm SO intrigued.

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13 hours ago, Geechee Girl said:

@ladyamylynn I'm all ears! 

Ok so I found out the guy's name and neither him nor his family have ever been discussed here, so I'm not going to say who it is on the forum, but feel free to PM me if you want to know.

 

ETA I think my last post got my first downvote! I'm oddly excited about that, haha.

Edited by ladyamylynn
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Despite living in Texas, I've really only had one encounter with a family I'd consider Fundie Elite. 

So my mom's parents are very Catholic, and I've been told that they didn't get that way until they got older, sicker, and close enough to death that they felt the need to truly find Jesus and repent for being horrible human beings. My cousins and I don't see them often because our parents don't like them, but we see them for the occasional Thanksgiving or Christmas.

A few years back when I was an undergraduate in college, we went to their place for Thanksgiving. It was then that we met a family my grandparents had met at church. They consisted of the griftiest type father you can imagine, a mother who relied on her older girls to raise the rest of the rugrats, and her "eight" children. I use quotes because there were only 7 children - 5 girls and 2 boys, but they continuously referred to their family of 8 children which included a long-since miscarried embryo that hadn't made it to the second trimester. These people had started to take advantage of my grandparents' new-found kindness towards others, and they let my grandparents basically babysit their eightseven children several times a week for no money at all.

I tried pretty hard to not be weirded out by them, but it was hard. The kids were home schooled and had no friends but each other. They kept telling us how "cool" their school was because every lesson had at least five references to Jesus in them. I was also quite miffed about how my grandparents kept saying what a "blessing" these children are. Jesus was giving them a "second chance" to be grandparents since they didn't get to see us often. I guess our parents were evil for not wanting their abusive parents hanging out with their kids idk.

What finally made me unable to handle these people any more was when the surprisingly outspoken mother of the family started to insult my mother for having the nerve to spend actual human money on her dog when the dog needed to have surgery done on her knees. She told my mother and I that people spending that kind of money on animals is evil, especially when there are needy children in the world. Considering I was studying to become a veterinarian, I didn't take it well. So I told her that if people kept their legs closed once and a while, there might not be as many needy children.

After that point, we never saw the family again. I'm sure they probably do have eight living, breathing kids now (if not more). 

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On January 11, 2016 at 1:14 PM, Archer said:

What finally made me unable to handle these people any more was when the surprisingly outspoken mother of the family started to insult my mother for having the nerve to spend actual human money on her dog when the dog needed to have surgery done on her knees. She told my mother and I that people spending that kind of money on animals is evil, especially when there are needy children in the world. Considering I was studying to become a veterinarian, I didn't take it well. So I told her that if people kept their legs closed once and a while, there might not be as many needy children.

After that point, we never saw the family again. 

Ha! You go girl. I would have told that lady off as well if she started in on why people should/shouldn't care about other living creatures malarky. I went off on a woman on Facebook that said her dog liked being outside in the freezing cold weather. Asked her if she would stick her kid outside in that weather. Didn't reply.    

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I used to have a driver that was fundie. He would come to pick up and would comment on the music I was listening to. Mind you the music was Cont. Christian. He said I should stick to the hymns.

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17 hours ago, manda b said:

I used to have a driver that was fundie. He would come to pick up and would comment on the music I was listening to. Mind you the music was Cont. Christian. He said I should stick to the hymns.

I hope you immediately switched to Black Sabbath or Slayer.

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On 12/20/2015 at 6:41 PM, Stickboi said:

Finally,we have bicycle missionaries here. Why do they only talk to the females? Is it a vulnerable thing?

I've noticed that too, we have a few show up at downtown festivals. They do seem to zero in on women, not sure why. I'm polite, however; if they're persistent, they probably wish they targeted someone else. Unsolicited proselytizing is never acceptable, in my opinion. 

On 12/20/2015 at 6:41 PM, Stickboi said:

First post here.

Welcome @Stickboi, I think you'll really enjoy FJ, I'm new too, and they are really nice.

Edited by ALM7
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On 1/6/2016 at 0:16 AM, Muskrat said:

In my long post above I forgot to add our craziest local fundamentalist. His name was Wiebo Ludwig.

Well, this is going to be a long and interesting read. There's a lot of information concerning the Trickle Creek raid etc. Thank you for sharing, I wasn't familiar with the Ludwig story. 

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6 hours ago, nastyhobbitses said:

I hope you immediately switched to Black Sabbath or Slayer.

I didn't have time or I would have.

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On ‎1‎/‎13‎/‎2016 at 9:09 AM, manda b said:

I used to have a driver that was fundie. He would come to pick up and would comment on the music I was listening to. Mind you the music was Cont. Christian. He said I should stick to the hymns.

 

Friends of my sister had a few kids that liked to hang out with me.  The kids, elementary school age, would accompany me to the beach, hiking, etc.  Then the family went near-cult fundy and tried to rope me in.  The last straw came when I picked the kids up to go to the mall.  I turned on the car radio, and one kid told me that Satan was in rock music and that I should change the channel.  I told him that I did not agree and instead, I'd change my mind and bring them back home.  Never saw or heard from them again.

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I just got home from a day trip to do a bit of shopping and more importantly sell my mom's car.  On the way home, I stopped by the grocery store (yes, there is snow in the forecast, no I'm not one of those that have to run to the store just because snow but this was going to be easier than going out tomorrow and well monday morning's temp is in the single digits).  So I'm not in at Hy-Vee or Walmart.  Or even Gerbes (Dillon's if your from KS, Kroger elsewhere).  I was at that store that someone took over next to one of the hospitals.  They've been remodeling so I haven't gone there and quite frankly was trying not to pass out from whatever chemical smell the remodel had fermenting in the store.  (i'm chemical fume sensitive but someone else walked past my complaining).  I turned a corner and stopped to grab lunch meat and noticed a pair of Mennonite young  women.  Identical dresses in a dark black/burgundy somber sort of pattern.  Black stockings.  Black shoes (modern but plain), Heavier black bonnets with the gauzy white bonnet peaking out from underneath and the ribbons peeking out.   Yes they are Mennonite nad not Amish because they checked out in a different line than I did.  They exited right after me and were parked next to mee in a simple black car with gray interior.  (this is how I know it was Mennonite, not Amish).  Not really suprised to see them since the small city I live in isn't far from Amish/Mennonite areas.  (and where I used to live there was a community of German Baptists that I put in the same sort of category).  

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On 1/14/2016 at 2:56 AM, nastyhobbitses said:

I hope you immediately switched to Black Sabbath or Slayer.

I'd go for Marilyn Manson myself.  

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Not exactly an encounter, but while indulging in a little BRB DYING ALONE Pinterest imaginary wedding planning, I came across a board of modest wedding dresses for a Godly lady...which included a picture of Wallis Simpson's wedding dress. Now, it's a lovely dress and it's certainly modest, but I just found it kind of hilarious that the dress from one of the most scandalous weddings of all time was being featured on a board filled with Jessa-esque confections and pictures of beaming brides in front of the Mormon Temple in Salt Lake City.

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I hit the Saver's 50% off sale yesterday in an Arkansas town about an hour south of where the Duggars live. Fundies everywhere! Of course, it's not unusual to run into them on a daily basis in this region, but there were quite a few more than normal.

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I live in Northeast US, so there aren't many fundys in my town - its not exactly the bible belt.  But it dawned on me recently that we have a fundy Baptist church in the next town over!  This occurred to me one day as I was driving past the place and saw a group of young men, probably HS aged, walking along side the road, dressed in dark colored suits.  There was only one place they could have been going since that area is not very heavily populated.  Then I remembered, my SIL used to attend that church!  She left after a few years.  I need to pick her brain about it one of these days. 

A few years ago a story broke in the local newspapers about the church, and there was a trial which brought everything into public light.  In 1997 a church elder (not sure if he was there while SIL was a member) raped a 15 year old girl, a student at the church's Christian school, who also happened to babysit his children.  She got pregnant.  He offered to pay for her to have an abortion (she said no), then he offered to punch her in the stomach as hard as he could to cause a miscarriage (what a guy!).  Her mother and/or the Pastor finally arranged for her to move out of state and place the baby for adoption (which she did), but not before she was made to stand in front of the entire congregation and confess her sin be shamed by the pastor and church elders for HER indiscretions.  The man was allowed to remain a member (maybe even an elder), but the girl and her family were driven out.

Although the church claimed they reported the rape to the state authorities, the man was not charged until a witness to the shaming wrote about the incident on a Independent Fundamentalist Baptist (IFB) cult survivors blog some 15 years later and it was finally reported and went to trial.  The man was convicted and sentenced to 15 - 30 years in prison, which he must still be serving.

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On 1/16/2016 at 5:37 PM, clueliss said:

I just got home from a day trip to do a bit of shopping and more importantly sell my mom's car.  On the way home, I stopped by the grocery store (yes, there is snow in the forecast, no I'm not one of those that have to run to the store just because snow but this was going to be easier than going out tomorrow and well monday morning's temp is in the single digits).  So I'm not in at Hy-Vee or Walmart.  Or even Gerbes (Dillon's if your from KS, Kroger elsewhere).  I was at that store that someone took over next to one of the hospitals.  They've been remodeling so I haven't gone there and quite frankly was trying not to pass out from whatever chemical smell the remodel had fermenting in the store.  (i'm chemical fume sensitive but someone else walked past my complaining).  I turned a corner and stopped to grab lunch meat and noticed a pair of Mennonite young  women.  Identical dresses in a dark black/burgundy somber sort of pattern.  Black stockings.  Black shoes (modern but plain), Heavier black bonnets with the gauzy white bonnet peaking out from underneath and the ribbons peeking out.   Yes they are Mennonite nad not Amish because they checked out in a different line than I did.  They exited right after me and were parked next to mee in a simple black car with gray interior.  (this is how I know it was Mennonite, not Amish).  Not really suprised to see them since the small city I live in isn't far from Amish/Mennonite areas.  (and where I used to live there was a community of German Baptists that I put in the same sort of category).  

Ah, someone else from "Gerbes country! Greetings, neighbor.

There used to be a fundamentalist college preacher here who would stand in the designated free speech zone and call out things like "masturbator" and "sodomite" to people walking by. Any attempts to engage him in reasonable dialogue would fail. However, he was well respected in the homeschool community and even was a leader in the junior high (if I remember right) age group. He finally moved on to another state and another college campus, but remains the butt of jokes.

I also saw an Amish couple at the east-side Wal-Mart Supercenter before Christmas. Looked as though they had never been there before. The man walked in the door and his jaw dropped and he was staring up at the ceiling then around the store in disbelief, repeating "oh my" to himself. 

On a recent drive an hour to the northeast, I saw a home that had signs either side of their mailbox to the effect of "God will judge all sinners with hell fire". Nice way to welcome visitors to your home. And an hour's drive to the southwest, nearly every town has at least one church proudly promoting symbols like "AV1611 ONLY" or "IFB KJV" on their signs.

I also grew up in one of the Gothard churches discussed periodically on this site and so know at least a half dozen of the prominent QF families though haven't crossed paths with most in years. Thankfully, fundie sightings now are notable exceptions to my life as opposed to the weekly norm.

Edited by formerlegalist
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