The Marriage Bed

[Pretzel]

Does anyone here remember the Marriage Bed? A few years ago it was a gold source for snark on christian sexual awkwardness, partly amusing, partly disturbing. It seems like it's banning the heathens from accessing it? I can't access the forum, does anyone else see the same error messages? 

[formergothardite]

Oh! I remember that! It was(might still be) one weird place. I can see the forum.

http://www.boards.themarriagebed.com/

 

[Pretzel]

Maybe they banned non-US IPs? I still get an error.  It might be better this way, TMB is one big, big rabbit hole. 

Oh, @formergothardite, do you remember the one with the  woman offering her then new-husband basically everything, and he was just.not.interested? It was priceless. I think her thread kept continuing on and on of people giving her godly advice and her husband just wouldn't cast an eye at her in, like, forever. Oww, the good times.   Several FJites were tempted to give her a hint as to why her husband might not be interested in sweet fellowship, but I'm afraid the mere mention of same-gender relations would get anyone banned from TMB for good. 

[keen23]

I can get in to that forum, but there's not a lot going on in there. At least in the public section. It's a lot of low T issues.

[SnazzyNazzy]

I peed in my marriage bed once. We had a soft-sided waterbed, and I was almost 9 months pregnant at the time. I had to pee really bad, and my pregnant butt, kept getting caught by a rogue wave in the mattress. I resembled a morbidly obese, stuck on its back, yet trying to flip itself turtle. I would make it to my side, then the bed would shift, and I'd roll over back on my back.

I peed because I was laughing so hard.

[purple_summer]

I've read through the boards before. Very very sad stuff. Lots of men giving women "advice" and being anything but helpful.

[princessmahina]

I peed in my marriage bed once. We had a soft-sided waterbed, and I was almost 9 months pregnant at the time. I had to pee really bad, and my pregnant butt, kept getting caught by a rogue wave in the mattress. I resembled a morbidly obese, stuck on its back, yet trying to flip itself turtle. I would make it to my side, then the bed would shift, and I'd roll over back on my back.

I peed because I was laughing so hard.

I literally LOLd in a quiet library when I read that.

[formergothardite]

Maybe they banned non-US IPs? I still get an error.  It might be better this way, TMB is one big, big rabbit hole. 

Oh, @formergothardite, do you remember the one with the  woman offering her then new-husband basically everything, and he was just.not.interested? It was priceless. I think her thread kept continuing on and on of people giving her godly advice and her husband just wouldn't cast an eye at her in, like, forever. Oww, the good times.   Several FJites were tempted to give her a hint as to why her husband might not be interested in sweet fellowship, but I'm afraid the mere mention of same-gender relations would get anyone banned from TMB for good. 

I do remember that and I wonder what happened in that situation. There were several situations where it seemed pretty obvious why the spouse wasn't slightly interested in having sex and the problem wasn't going to be prayed away. 

The virgin wedding night threads always read like someone was using the board to practice writing erotica.

I bet Ken Alexander is a member there.  

[SnazzyNazzy]

I literally LOLd in a quiet library when I read that.

One of the few times, that I have literally wept tears of joy, is when that damned bed sprung an unfixable leak.

[blessalessi]

OMG, that is a rabbithole I didn't need to fall down! 

[Pretzel]

I have never been a member there nor wasted a thought on registering, ever. I was merely reading, years ago. I wonder why I have issues accessing the site. 

[FoxyMoxie]

It's sad really, but for a young Christian from a particular background, TMB seemed pretty liberal and forward thinking in how much it seemed to show sex as a good thing. But then I also thought I'd be married by 25 to a Christian guy I met at uni, and I'm delighted that this has not happened.

[Iamhispurity]

Wow, thats quite a rabbit hole to go down...

[Fundie Bunny]

I peed in my marriage bed once. We had a soft-sided waterbed, and I was almost 9 months pregnant at the time. I had to pee really bad, and my pregnant butt, kept getting caught by a rogue wave in the mattress. I resembled a morbidly obese, stuck on its back, yet trying to flip itself turtle. I would make it to my side, then the bed would shift, and I'd roll over back on my back.

I peed because I was laughing so hard.

You fixed my day  And now i have to pee

[AlwaysExcited]

What does it say about me that the first section I opened was "sexual sin"?

[Pretzel]

I can see it,  now that I'm using another browser. Yeah not a lot has changed.   I remember a few years ago there was a guy complaining about his wife not letting him touch her breasts. Apparently she had just given birth, or was pregnant, I don't remember exactly and she just couldn't take it, whereas he was asking her to "take one for the team". 

Oh my, the misogyny. 

[Fundie Bunny]

Holy shit, i am reading this, and is awful. A man asking for advice to control his sexual desire before his wedding in 12 months. The responses are just marry sooner. Those people are plain stupid

[Iamhispurity]

Those sexual abuse  threads are awful...

 

[SnazzyNazzy]

I just found myself saying "oohh honey" to myself, on almost every random thread I opened. Ohh honey, can either be a sympathetic one, or a "you deserve a facepalm" one.

[AlwaysExcited]

Those lust & immodesty  threads are awful...

 

Hey, I can't open them, it says that I need to register.
I do not want to register, I just want lust!

[SnazzyNazzy]

Hey, I can't open them, it says that I need to register.I do not want to register, I just want lust!

I can't get into lust either. The plus side is the pornography section is accessible. I saw habitual masturbation, and just had to take a gander.

[Iamhispurity]

I meant the sexual abuse one. Copied and pasted the wrong thing....

[notfundy]

Huh.  Wow.   I looked through the wedding night threads a little bit ...  so, bring a towel.  Put a washcloth, kleenex, t-paper by the side of the bed.  
Bring lots of lube.   Lots o' lots o' lube.

Yes, another rabbit hole for sure.  

[princessmahina]

There are some areas I just won't venture into on that forum. Sexual Abuse is at the top of the list. I don't want to hear what kind of bullshit they have to say on such a delicate subject. 

[blessalessi]

I just read a really wtf but also very sad thread about a woman angry with her husband for accessing porn, because when she sees images of naked women it triggers her same-sex attraction....