Bergey Family - 8 kids and living in an RV

[Gimme a Free RV]

I noticed how none of the boys, IIRC, were described as helpers.  Of course, that's because menfolk don't do housework.  I was also taken aback by Selina's mentioning Ling's laundry skills.

To be fair, my grown children still call me "Mommy."  I didn't insist on it.  That's what they started calling me when they were old enough to talk and it just stuck.  They are welcome, at any time, to call me whatever they want.  In fact, I even sign cards to them "Mom."  I figure, if they are ashamed to call me "Mommy," they'll stop.  They let go of the proverbial apron strings long ago and, in their 20s, they know it all and are the wisest human beings on the face of this earth.  No one has an opinion or suggestion that could possibly be helpful, you know, because of how they already possess great insight and intelligence.  So...yeah.  

[paulypepper]

https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=3aeufK0XMTA&feature=share

not really a surprise, but they have a singing ministry to grift for funds.

In the first 12 seconds of that video you can see fear in the eyes of the kids as dad is telling Ling (Johanna) apparently to face forward..gives me chills as well as wanting to slap the #%*! out of him!!

[ladymissdiva]

No joy whatsoever.  Some of those kids look scared to be up there.   Others look bored.   The one I think is Johanna looks especially sad.  The song is patronizing and depressing. 

WhatsHisFace, the dad, has to poke her to make her look at the camera.

[iweartanktops]

I  really can't stand this woman. I've just read "In the Daze after the Diagnosis" and "5 ways to regulate a sensory child" here is the link to both.

http://perspectivesinparenting.com/?cat=7 

First of all every child is a sensorial creature, did you mean sensory disregulated Selina? Then, SPD (Sensory Processing Disorder) is a still very controversial diagnosis that isn't recognised per se in the ICD-10 nor in the DSM-V where it's recognised only as part of the Autism Spectrum Disorder. It's recognised as a diagnosis on its own only in the DC:0-3. Why? Because it's symptoms, especially if taken separately as she seems to do, can be explained by a whole shitload of other reasons and diagnoses. Does it tell you anything that it takes a multidisciplinary equipe performing a variety of tests and observations to diagnose it, Selina? Oh well, even if your child was never officially diagnosed you can always follow Selina's advice, you know. Also research says that causes are mostly unknown,  but very very probably genetic and neurological difference has been found in the brain of those affected.  Just like Autism with which it share a high comorbidity. Oh I forgot that probably this nut thinks that Autism is caused by modern medicine so why SPD can't be caused by early childhood trauma? Because what is caused by early childhood trauma is often called PTSD dear Selina, but you didn't like it, right? Too much awareness about it for people to follow your advice, so better choose a dx that your children probably don't have than one that they could have. Also, if my child doesn't pee for 24 hrs I would think other reasons before SPD.

And if they really have it? Reminding them to eat, drink and going to the loo is like using essential oils when antibiotics are needed. But why should I be surprised? Also, forcing on a child unwanted and unpleasant contact (bear hugs) may be more harmful than useful as with forcing sensorial stimulation without knowing exactly what you are doing. Oh but, you know,  being a christian adoptive parent makes you an authority on practically everything. 

"I will never forget the day we got the special needs diagnosis". We? Do you have any special need Selina? Throughout the entire post you manage to never say who got the diagnosis and what the diagnosis is. But how you suffered. Oh the sufference of being a special needs parent! It sounds like you're delighted of finally be able to labek yourself as such. Honestly the only diagnosis is that you are a narcissistic, selfish parent obtuse to your children real needs. Unfortunately it's not in the DSM-V probably because at the moment it's incurable,  you can't fix stupid.

 

I just read this garbage! Your post is right on! 

She's not the sharpest tool in the shed. Ever heard of hunger, Selina? If your kids can't get to sleep or wake up pleasantly (not sure why that's required) without a snack, it's not a disorder, it's hunger. And depending on the child's age, if they need reminders to empty their own bladder, perhaps they should be taken to a medical professional! 

[Paperplate]

Along with what everyone else has already said about this family, I want to add that I really feel for Johanna Ling because she's so small and looks so young. It must be hard living with a sister who's 4 or 5 years younger, but so much taller and older looking (and presumably more proficient in English). Eliana, who's barely a teenager, but is called a "leader" and Ling, who's basically an adult, but gets to be "Mommy's laundry girl". Nice ...

(And this is just in addition to all the other stuff that going down in their family.)

[blessalessi]

Am I right in thinking there is more on the blog today, than yesterday?

It looks like she is moving nuggets of "wisdom" over from the closed blog, leaving behind the worst of it.

AHA.....Interesting. 

 http://perspectivesinparenting.com/?p=430

 

AN OPEN LETTER TO THE CRITICS

Some of you have noticed that I shut down the Bergey Bunch blog this past week. I had been planning to rearrange some things (and move some of the content over here) anyway, but the real reason I shut it down abruptly was because I was hurt.

You see, I found out on Thursday that our family was being attacked by an online  community. I noticed a huge jump in page views, so I followed a referral link and found my entire family being ridiculed, made fun of, nit-picked, and slandered. Every decision we’ve made the past few years as a family has been questioned.

They dug through my facebook and shared personal pictures and posts. They pulled bits and pieces from various blog posts and videos and garnered out-right lies from them. They found our ministry website and mocked our ministry, our pastor, our adoptions, our children’s singing, and much, much more.

And I’m going to be very honest here. The hurt of this nearly crippled me.

I couldn’t breathe as I continued to read the mockery and hate. 

I shut down my old blog and switched my facebook over to “friends only” in an attempt to hide in my imaginary turtle shell and avoid further ridicule and hurt.  

I didn’t sleep at all that night, and woke up the next morning in a complete fog.

I sat with my family and cried.

I very much wanted to defend our family, point by point by point. I wanted to remove all of our internet presence and lick my virtual wounds. I wanted to scream, “You don’t know my family and you don’t know the truth!”

But that’s ME.

It’s not my Jesus. He came to earth and taught us to love our enemies, to return evil with good, to walk 2 miles if we’re asked to walk only 1, to live peaceably with all men. 

I am so far from being like Him, but oh, how I long to see people through His eyes.  

Here’s my response to the critics:

Dear Friends,

I’m sorry we’re meeting this way. I would have rather met you ANY way but like this….

But since you’re here anyway, there’s something you need to know about the Bergey family.

We’re not a perfect family.

Brent’s not a perfect father. I’m definitely not a perfect mother. Our children aren’t perfect, either(but I think they’re absolutely awesome just the way they are). We’ve made many, many mistakes along the parenting way. We didn’t know it all when we brought home our girls, and if we could go back (with Johanna in particular), we would change the way we did many things.  We won’t be perfect missionaries, and  I bet when we are old and sitting around reminiscing about our life journey, we’ll all wish we could live our lives again and do a better job.

We’re not perfect, but we love each other unconditionally, and we love Jesus with all our hearts. 

I don’t blog because I’ve got it all figured out and want you to be just like me. 

I blog because I long to encourage other families to love big, parent connectedly, follow Jesus whole-heartedly, and live just a little bit more outside their comfort zone. 

The truth here is, if you look for the bad in someone, you’re going to find it. (If you look for the good, it’s usually there, too.) If you’ve decided ahead of time that you’re going to hate someone, it’s pretty easy to find enough reasons to follow through. 

I’m not hurting anymore about the unkind words you’re saying about my family. I’m not angry. To be honest, I just feel sad.

I’m sad because I bet if we met up in the mall, we’d have fun chatting while drinking our coffee and watching our children play together. I’m sad because I bet if you were my next door neighbor, you’d make me sugar cookies at Christmastime and I’d watch your children when you needed a night out with your spouse. I’m sad because I bet we’d really like each other if we saw each other through untainted glasses. 

I don’t hate you.

Instead, I’m choosing love. You see, my Jesus loved as no man before or after has ever done, and He expects me to follow Him and love like He loves.

If you want to continue looking for the bad, keep reading. I’m sure you’ll find enough to keep you busy for a while. I’m not going to hide in my imaginary turtle shell. I’m just going to continue being me.

And while you’re here, I’d love to share my Jesus with you. You see, He saw through all my bad and even the very stinky ugly, and He loved me anyway.

And He loves you, too.

If you ever need a friend, you know where to find me. 

Blessings,

Selina

TL:DR. Selina is too hurt to answer the criticisms of her adoption practices but Jesus wants us to be friends  

[ladyaudley]

she's got a post for us! An Open Letter to the Critics, in which she is sure we'd ne best friends if we were neighbours, but in no way addresses the concerns that this board has thrown up. So, Selina. I'm asking nicely:

 

Why did you change your teenage daughter's eminently pronounceable name even though keeping her birth name would have been infinitely easier for her?

Have you ever considered that the phrasing of your descriptions for your adopted children makes them sound like they are more "useful" around the house than your biological children, the "leaders"?

Do you use spanking as part of your child training?

 

 

No hostility, just outright questions. Do me the favour of giving outright answers. Jesus would have. 

[ViolaSebastian]

I’m sad because I bet if we met up in the mall, we’d have fun chatting while drinking our coffee and watching our children play together. I’m sad because I bet if you were my next door neighbor, you’d make me sugar cookies at Christmastime and I’d watch your children when you needed a night out with your spouse. I’m sad because I bet we’d really like each other if we saw each other through untainted glasses. 

And while we're having fun chatting and drinking coffee, I would tell you under no uncertain terms that I find it unconscionable that you make your adopted children sing a song about dead mothers and starving children.  And I wouldn't let you watch my children, given what you the Pearlesque "loving correction" you espouse on your blog.  So there's that.   

[blessalessi]

Our children aren’t perfect, either(but I think they’re absolutely awesome just the way they are).

If you think all your children are all awesome, why did you leave the adopted ones behind when you went on each of your scoping trips to South Africa?  

Why is Johanna Ling, your 18 year old adopted daughter, described as a "servant" and "the laundry girl" on your blog, while Eliana, your younger child from birth is described as "gifted" and "a leader".

Can you recognise why we are concerned about this?

[chaotic life]

I just can't even....wow....she has completely missed PTSD and orphanage behaviors, food deprivation effects, after effects of malnutrition and ESL impact.

It's is NOT SPD!!!! It's the fight or flight response of PTSD. My god, I just did an IEP this spring where they wanted to try to label my kids ADD. I had to walk them through that they did not need a new label. They needed some education of what all PTSD entails because the sensory dysregulation and the complete lack of attention span is PTSD.

This was a team willing and wanting to learn, and it took the ESL teacher and I nearly an hour to help them understand.

Yes, those are the symptoms. Yes. It drives you BATTY sometimes. We had one I nicknamed Scarecrow for the longest time because despite how crazy bright he was, it was like he had no brain. They still all do brainless, not thinking, definitely not hearing things sometimes. But the longer they are in a safe environment, the longer they use coping skills and work at regulating, the longer they have had therapy and that fight or flight response subsides, the less you see the issues.

The absolute WORST thing you can do for these kids is insist that you regulate FOR them.

Saddest story I have is my last to join us. I am well aware all kids with this background need unfettered access to food, to the point often they need their own bag of non perishable food that they keep on their person at all times.

Because of the circumstances of the last adoptee's coming, CPS in the sending state queried CPS in our state to conduct a safety investigation and determine whether the abandoning family had dumped him in a safe environment with us. So, social worker wanted to know what were some of his behaviors I was dealing with. I explained I was having a horrific time convincing him to only hoarde non-perishable food in his backpack and room. I heard a guarded groan when she asked me how I was handling it. In frustration I said I didn't handle it. I gave up.....and put his own dorm fridge in his room.

She nearly cried. Said she cannot ever convince families to quit controlling the food for these kids and was afraid I was going to say I started controlling his.

This is one thing I DO have an advantage as a parent. I know abuse, and I know food insecurity. I don't know war but I know a little about cultural shock but I KNOW what it's like to go to bed hungry night after night. She can out pretty words on making her kids eat and drink but it's still control. The longer you keep controlling them, the more you impede their ability to control their own lives and even bodily functions. Just STOP. Let them make mistakes. Put a food waste line in your grocery budget. Yes, it sucks but they NEED the luxury of food to see it can be thrown away and there's still food there to eat. Give them a water bottle they can carry with them all day and leave them alone about drinking. These kids do not show up with these issues because no one ever controlled their world but rather because everything about their world was controlled. They need autonomy not more regulation and control.

[laPapessaGiovanna]

Ahh the righteous butthurt!

Listen Selina we don't give a s#@* about your butthurtedness. We are worried for your children, especially the adopted ones, particularly Ling Johanna. Did you have them assessed for PTSD? Did they have proper therapy (with trained, licensed therapists) to deal with eventual proper diagnosis and to help them adjust? When you diagnosed Ling Johanna with low IQ was an interpreter involved in the process? 

Answer our questions and we will stop wondering and questioning. It shouldn't be difficult, after all you have already splattered your children's lives all over the web. Also, we aren't trolls nor we have evil aims, we are only concerned with your children wellbeing, as you too should be.

BTW I probably wouldn't trust you with my cats never mind my daughter.  

[formergothardite]

Aww, she pulled the "we aren't perfect" line out of the bag to use instead of actually addressing any concerns. Classic really. That is pretty much what all fundies use when called out on their awful behavior. 

Selena, since you are reading here, if there are lies, please share them. FJ members do screw up, so I really want to know where people here lied. If you want to love us, show us where we lied, because people here try to give accurate info. If you don't do that, I am going to assume it is because YOU are the one that lied, not us. So show some love by sharing where we aren't giving accurate information. 

I know your Jesus. I was one of those real Christians, same brand as you, for decades. If your Jesus approves of how you are treating your children, then your Jesus is worse than useless. If you want us to think your Jesus isn't an awful, awful God, I would suggest you start by address the concerns people have shown in this thread. It won't be easy and it will probably force you outside your comfort zone(but isn't that what you want to inspire people to do?). The easy way out will be to ignore all these concerns and just convince yourself we are a bunch of haters. 

No, I wouldn't let you watch my children. I have very strict standards about who gets to watch my children and you would not pass the high bar I set. I don't think you would let me watch your kids either. I would make your cookies and offer to help you if you needed help, not because I have a god who tells me I should, but because that is just what decent people do. Even seeing you with these "tainted" eyes, I would offer to help if you were in true need. 

I don't think you would actually like me. I'm a liberal, feminist atheist who knows the Bible inside out and backwards so your chances of saving my heathen soul are pretty damn slim.  I have noticed that fundamental Christians aren't too fond of former fundamental Christians who can argue back. 

We all mess up and there are all things we look back and think that we would do differently, the thing is, there was/is nothing on your blogs that reflect that you regret how you treated your adopted daughters. Nothing that makes me think that you are putting your children's best interest first. It is easy to say children are a blessing, but when I look at your blog I don't see that reflected at all. Stop and think long and hard why no one here came away with the impression that this was a family that placed a high value on their children. You can tell yourself that it is because we have tainted glasses, but you will be lying to yourself to keep from facing the truth. 

Don't love us, love your children. Unconditionally. Treat your children with kindness and understanding. Put them first, even if that means you have to give up your missionary fantasy. Give them a stable, loving home where they are well educated and capable of following their dreams. 

[DaisyD]

I have to tell you Chaotic. I really admire you. You have taken pain and turned it into unconditional love. The ability to open your heart when most of us would wall it off is inspiring to me. It's not fangirl, it's very deep respect.

 

To Selina. You show more self awareness than many of the people we discuss here. That is good. You admit that you have made mistakes, and the point of your blogging is to encourage others. I pose to you that, perhaps, explaining what mistakes you made would be of great encouragement to your readers. You may help them to not repeat your mistakes in the process. As far as comments about your pastor and mission go, using children as a tool to convert others to your religion is bad enough. Using them in that way while you are in control of their basic needs is downright awful.

[Grimalkin]

The fundie concept of all children owing adults thanks gets ever so tiring. Whether you birthed them or adopted them, they had very little to do with entering your family. Why the great entitlement to praise for doing the same basic and ordinary responsibility ANY parent owes their children?

 

And it's just RUDE to get a treat in front of your kids and not get them one too! If you don't have the funds or don't want to get them one then just get yourself something when they are not around! It's really not a hard concept like it gets made out to be.

     Getting ice cream and not sharing, and then deciding they cannot have any next time sounds spiteful and petty and exactly how I would not want my child to behave. I teach my kids to share by example. 

[Palimpsest]

Here we go again.  Hi Selina.  As you know who we are and want to be friends you are welcome to post here yourself and explain some of the things we have got so wrong.  I would like to point out a few things that you might want to think about in your most recent post.

AN OPEN LETTER TO THE CRITICS

Some of you have noticed that I shut down the Bergey Bunch blog this past week. I had been planning to rearrange some things (and move some of the content over here) anyway, but the real reason I shut it down abruptly was because I was hurt.

You see, I found out on Thursday that our family was being attacked by an online  community. I noticed a huge jump in page views, so I followed a referral link and found my entire family being ridiculed, made fun of, nit-picked, and slandered. Every decision we’ve made the past few years as a family has been questioned.

No, your entire family were not being ridiculed, made fun of, nit-picked, and slandered.  Your public blog posts and your public facebook posts and some of your self-described and admitted decisions and actions were being analyzed and criticized.  Yes, your writing style was mocked a little.  Yours, not your children's.  We don't mock children here.

They dug through my facebook and shared personal pictures and posts. They pulled bits and pieces from various blog posts and videos and garnered out-right lies from them. They found our ministry website and mocked our ministry, our pastor, our adoptions, our children’s singing, and much, much more.

No we did not.  We read a few of your public entries, quoted a couple and gave links.  We found your public mission website and questioned whether it was a valid mission.  No-one mocked your adoptions.  Far from it.  People here who have experience with adoption and opinions on transnational adoption criticized you, your choice of music, and your ability to teach your children to sing well. 

And I’m going to be very honest here. The hurt of this nearly crippled me.

I couldn’t breathe as I continued to read the mockery and hate. 

I shut down my old blog and switched my facebook over to “friends only” in an attempt to hide in my imaginary turtle shell and avoid further ridicule and hurt.  

I didn’t sleep at all that night, and woke up the next morning in a complete fog.

I sat with my family and cried.

You set almost everything to private, which you should have done before for the sake of your children's privacy.  You were very upset at the criticism.  Did you cry in front of your children and tell them why?  I hope not.  It might have upset them.

I very much wanted to defend our family, point by point by point. I wanted to remove all of our internet presence and lick my virtual wounds. I wanted to scream, “You don’t know my family and you don’t know the truth!”

But that’s ME.

True.  We were only looking at things that you have made public yourself.  We don't know everything about you. No-one said you had to be perfect.  I think your children are all beautiful and adorable.  It is the decisions you are making that I criticize.

I don’t blog because I’ve got it all figured out and want you to be just like me. 

It seems to me that you blog because you think you have a lot to teach and are not interested in learning.  You portray yourself as an expert on parenting, adoption, adoption of older children, and special needs children.  You think you have so much to teach you need to go to South Africa to teach others.  Don't you think that is rather arrogant?

I question your decision to go to South Africa, I really do.  I question your fitness to be missionaries, I really do.  Have you ever considered that three of your children have suffered enough disruption in their short lives.  They might best be served with a stable environment, a permanent home base, and a consistent education, utilizing available services here? 

While we are at it, they are all your children.  Some were adopted and some are your biological children but they are all your children. 

Do you intend to vaccinate your children before going overseas.  There are worse diseases than chicken pox.  Why pack them into a trailer and drag them around the country to serve your, and Brent's, ambitions to be missionaries?  Why not donate the money you are spending doing this to a South African Orphanage run by people who know what they are doing?

If you’ve decided ahead of time that you’re going to hate someone, it’s pretty easy to find enough reasons to follow through. 

No hatred here.  Dislike certainly.  Intense dislike of your arrogance.

I’m not hurting anymore about the unkind words you’re saying about my family. I’m not angry. To be honest, I just feel sad.

I wish you felt thoughtful and introspective.  I don't want to make you feel sad I want you to think about what you are doing and how your writings and actions are perceived.

Again, you are welcome to come here and discuss our criticisms at any time. 

[iweartanktops]

I have a few things to add, as well:

Selina, why is it so important to you that your children constantly yield to you? I understand wanting them to learn respect, but requiring them to yield, and taking every opportunity to break their will is not necessary. Please correct me if I'm wrong, but it sounds like you desire to control every single thing they do and say. 

Another question is, why can't your children ask why you have a certain rule, and receive an answer beyond, "because I said so?" It's perfectly healthy for kids and teenagers to want to know why. Do you not have an answer, other than, it's a way to control them, or do you really think they shouldn't be able to ask such questions? I would think you might want to use those questions as times to teach them. That's a great opportunity to tell them why you think certain things are important, etc. Giving them answers could open up some great dialogue with you and your family. 

Why do you insist on training your children, rather than teaching, guiding and nurturing them? 

How could you be surprised that we noticed the disparity between the way you refer to Ling vs your other older daughter? And why on earth would you take her name - the only thing that has always belonged to her - away from her? 

And in case you didn't know, dropping Ling at a residential treatment facility and leaving the country is absolutely abandonment! 

[laPapessaGiovanna]

Thanks @Palimpsest for being so calm, considerate and articulate.

[Mitz_]

I don't hate her. She just makes me sad. I went to her blog looking for something good but what I found was someone so arrogant and so self righteous, someone who assumes I don't know Jesus. 

 

[lawlifelgbt]

I don't either. Her views and politics, sure. The Christian right just wants to deny me and my family all rights in society, and depending on the level of right-wing/fundie, torture, imprison, or even kill me. But I can't go around hating people. That said, it's probably easier to fix being antigay than it is to fix problems with your parenting.

[Mitz_]

I am so bewildered by Selina's response, is it even possible that she has never experienced criticism before? It's as if she is so accustomed to being admired she has had the shock of her life to find out that not everyone admires her. I can't imagine. 

Criticism only hurts when you have doubts about yourself.  

If she is that delicate they should probably reconsider Africa. She might be a burden there.

 

 

[Grimalkin]

I would be upset to find FJ snarking on my blog too, which is why I don't blog. Nobody likes criticism, but when I get it I pause and consider what I hear.

         All this nonsense about teaching God's love. You teach God's love with harshness? Obeying without questioning? Do you want your kids to think for themselves? Sounds like they are just inviting predators to abuse them. Any person with authority that appears respected can really harm them, they could think to themselves this is not right but not be able to do anything about it. 

       I challenge Selina to show God's love as being unconditional and all consuming, no matter what. Love is patient, love is kind....not self seeking, not easily angered. There is no fear in love. God gives me blessings I don't deserve. I am aware of this. I don't see kindness or warmth in your blog. The example of love is spiteful and petty .You and Lisa Pennington have a lot in common though your wrath is a little better under wraps.

ETA - just watched those videos. If those people came to my church and sang I would surely donate money and pray on my knees fervently for them. Mostly out of concern. Scary, scary, Daddy! Sad kids!

[chaotic life]

I don't hate you, Selina. I hate that you are intentionally putting yourself out there as an adoptive parent mentor when you are failing at basic adoption issues, even as you give lip service to them to prove you aren't like so many of the fundie adoptive parents I mentor in crisis, you have actually HEARD the right information and still opt to disregard it.

I don't give a hill of beans about your hurt. I've been part of the adoption triad for 24 years now. I started mentoring adoptive parents my adoption agencies sent to me to help right around the point where you are NOW as an adoptive mother because it was an adoptive mother mentor who walked ME through those early days when all the book reading in the world wasn't keeping me from losing my mind actually parenting a hurting child.

Know what you won't find though? You won't find a blog detailing my children's struggles. You will only find anecdotal snippets in places like this. Sure, I share some really big challenges and fears and times I worried my boys would never overcome ONE ON ONE when it has been relevant to the mothers I mentor to help them. But I do not put my children's names, stories or struggles out there for the world to see. Because I may like blogs as much as the next person, but I have known for a very long time that hurting children need privacy to make their mistakes and learn and grow without it haunting them forever.

I don't criticize you because I have evil intentions or misunderstand you. Sadly, I understand you far too well. I left fundamentalist evangelical Christianity and like a previous poster I can quote that bible you thump backwards and forwards.

I criticize you because others who lack the experience need to have your poor choices balanced, and because maybe you'll set aside your arrogance and act in your children's best interest, though I doubt it. BUT, the Internet is forever and more than one adult adoptee has directly told me that they fought their own way to healing by heading my passionately advocating for how hurting older adoptees SHOUlD be handled to compare it to how they were treated. Because it was living with a healthy family for mere months as a teen that helped me find MY way out of abuse and into health. Someday your daughters will google themselves, trust me my teens all have, and Ling and the smaller two will be able to read for themselves something to contras your arrogance and heavy handed control of their lives. And hurting children are who I care about, not parents unwilling to seek and secure appropriate help for those hurting kids. And you cannot possibly be getting regular, trained, experience therapy for Ling cavorting around in an RV preparing to head off to South Africa this way.

And frankly, having forgotten a therapy appointment was moved to today for a kid and having to run fast earlier today to get there, and trying to keep three kids balanced on the same day even as they want activities and lives and TIRED after weekly treks to assorted therapies for multiple children with rare breaks non-stop for the last.....13?14? Years now, I have NO sympathy for parents who take in hurting kids and refuse to get them the professional help they need unless and until crisis hits, which is what I see you doing.

[busdrivingmom]

I'm Catholic with an Our Lady of Guadalupe statue on the porch.  She probably wouldn't set foot on my property to be "friends."  She probably wouldn't even wave from the safety of her car.  

[Childless]

Quite frankly, I really don't care what she thinks of me.  I criticize her actions because they deserve to be criticized.  Instead of reading this forum, taking our words to heart, and making needed changes, she pens a woe is me letter and learns nothing.  Just like her blog, everything is about her and how she feels when it should be about her children and what is right for them.

[Grimalkin]

The more I think about it the more ridiculous she is. She clearly states in her introduction that she sees herself as a mentor. She writes as if she were trying to teach/ inform others. Then some strangers on the internet write some disagreeing statements and she throws a dramatic tantrum, pouts and stomps off. Kind of like a spoiled brat who is used to being told how wonderful she is for adopting all those poor kids. which kind of goes against her whole parenting philosophy. 

 

        Tania Ferguson's dramatic "goodbye cruel Internet!" Was way better.