Colorado with the Moodys

[fiery redhead]

Today while waiting in urgent care I took the liberty of reading the cringe worthy sample chapter of Colorado with the Moodys. My heart broke a little with every paragraph for Sarah Maxwell who has absolutely zero options in life.

http://www.titus2.com/book-10-colorado-with-the-moodys.html?utm_source=155&utm_medium=288&utm_campaign=423

 

[Lissa1481]

Omg. Stay out of my state,  moodys.

Reading that sample was freaking torture. I'd rather be watching the paint in my bathroom dry. 

[Lillybee]

Didn't you find the sock caper fun? That book was seriously awful.

[defraudingjezebel]

Holy God, that was awful. I looked up the "million dollar bill tract" and found this website, where they sell Star Wars (!) themed tracks. I'm dying of laughter. http://store.livingwaters.com/force-awakened-million-dollar-bill.html

[prayawaythefundie]

What did I just read? I don't think reading this book makes any kid any smarter but what else could poor Sarah Maxwell write about? Her life is boring. All she knows is hiking, fasting and praising the lord.

[Marian the Librarian]

That is just...painful.

[PartriarchydefyinValkarie]

Yeah, now I am glad that Goosebumps are becoming popular again. Reading that sample was torture, I was kinda hoping one of those kids would get sucked into the stream... something more exciting than.. "Oh poo, my shoes and clothes are all wet. Gee willikers." Ugh, so much...blandness...

[Cactus]

Christ, that was dreadful. 

Like Mitch, I have a hard time believing that this tripe is real, but if it was, that'd be incredible. 

[AlwaysExcited]

I'm not excited. Need to go and watch how grass grow in order to restore my adventurous mood.

[blessalessi]

So this family considers it normal to approach passing hikers and ask them outright to give you spare socks and plasters?! 

 

And to give them a death tract in return??!! 

[Sweet Fellowship]

I don't think I want to read it. It'll just make me feel even more sad for Poor Sarah.

[AmazonGrace]

Well there is a reason this book is self-published.

[Pretzel]

Does anyone here have troubles falling asleep?Some nights I'm turning from one side to the other, trying to calm down and getting to the point when my brain would finally hit that sleepy trance-state that makes me doze off to sleep....

I have no doubts that reading 'Colorado with the Moodys' is the best sleeping aid ever. I bet if they sold it in pharmacies as a sedative, the Maxwells could make a real fortune.

[anjulibai]

I bought the book. Should be getting it in November sometime. I'll let you know what else is as exciting as the wet sock.

[Naga Viper]

So nine books later and Sarah's showing zero growth as a writer. It'd be funny if whatever this new series she's planning turns out to be a quantum leap stylistically, but I think we all know the odds of that happening. Even some of the testimonials on the back cover read...less than naturalistically. Can't help yourself from editing, can you, Steve?

Thanks for taking one for the team, anjulibai! I'll be less interested in the "adventures" of the interchangeable kids and more in the portrayals of Dad the patronizing micromanager and Mom the hands-off depressive.

[SPHASH]

I bought the book. Should be getting it in November sometime. I'll let you know what else is as exciting as the wet sock.

Thanks for taking one for the team!

[twin2]

I bought the book. Should be getting it in November sometime. I'll let you know what else is as exciting as the wet sock.

Thanks for taking one for the team!

Yes!  Consider either donating it to a church library or somewhere else afterwards to really piss Steve off 

[Naga Viper]

I bought the book. Should be getting it in November sometime. I'll let you know what else is as exciting as the wet sock.

Thanks for taking one for the team!

Yes!  Consider either donating it to a church library or somewhere else afterwards to really piss Steve off 

 

Or would a public library piss him off even more?

I'm not sure what to make of Mary's art in the sample. It really is, to use Sarah's own term, just a sketch; it's almost too minimal for me to judge one way or the other.

[anjulibai]

A public library would really piss Steve off, but a public school library would probably give him a heart attack.

[Grimalkin]

I bought the book. Should be getting it in November sometime. I'll let you know what else is as exciting as the wet sock.

Thanks for taking one for the team!

Yes!  Consider either donating it to a church library or somewhere else afterwards to really piss Steve off 

 

Or would a public library piss him off even more?

I'm not sure what to make of Mary's art in the sample. It really is, to use Sarah's own term, just a sketch; it's almost too minimal for me to judge one way or the other.

My public library would add it to the used book sale pile. It would end up in a bin where you can fill a bag for $1.

Tell me I the hikers fill the wet sock with quarters and use it as a weapon.

[twin2]

Just read the sample pages.

Really want to know how many "rules" there are for hiking......

[Granwych]

I bought the book. Should be getting it in November sometime. I'll let you know what else is as exciting as the wet sock.

Thanks for taking one for the team!

Yes!  Consider either donating it to a church library or somewhere else afterwards to really piss Steve off 

 

Or give it to a high school English teacher for a "how NOT to write a children's book" (or any book) class---

[Terrie]

I'd love to hand these books to any high school student and a red pen and see what they do with it.

[salex]

A public library would really piss Steve off, but a public school library would probably give him a heart attack.

But, would most public schools keep it in their library?  The sample is pretty poorly written.  And around here, most books donated to the library are sold at their annual used book sale. 

I wonder if selling it for 3 cents on Amazon would be more amusing, though it would be a pain in the ass.

[PennySycamore]

I bought the book. Should be getting it in November sometime. I'll let you know what else is as exciting as the wet sock.

Thanks for taking one for the team!

Yes!  Consider either donating it to a church library or somewhere else afterwards to really piss Steve off 

 

Or give it to a high school English teacher for a "how NOT to write a children's book" (or any book) class---

That reminds me the end of the episode of I Love Lucy where she has written a novel and is to submit it to a second publisher after it was rejected by the first publisher.  Excerpts of the novel were to be used in a book for aspiring writers in a chapter titled "Don't let this happen to you."